Chapter 9

James's POV

Ah, hell.

Crap, think of something romantic to say.

"Uh…"

Well done, James.

Bravo.

"I gotta go." Lily stands and grabs her things, and before I can object, she's gone.

Sirius returns with hands full of Treacle Tarts.

"Wheeres Ebans?" His says with his mouth full.

I lay my head on the table.

"She's gone."

Lily's POV

I run from the table straight back to my room. It was so obvious, we weren't together, but we were acting like we were… like I'm some play-thing.

No. I won't be that.

Not even for Jame-Potter.

Not even for Potter.

James's POV

I look on the Marauder's map, and Lily's in her room.

I grab my broomstick and fly up the stairs, and knock at the top.

"Lily?"

"Go away, Potter!"

That stung more than if she'd slapped me- but more than that- it worried me.

No, we couldn't be back to square one.

I wouldn't let it be.

Lily's POV

I wake up the next morning and my head feels like it's about to explode.

"Owwww…" I groan as I sit up.

I head to the bathroom and open up the medicine cabinet. I grab a painkiller and soon get ready for DADA.

I don't feel like going to breakfast, so I head straight to class. No one's there yet, which is fine, but albeit a bit annoying. I sit in one of the chairs, and quickly realize this is the room me and Jam- Potter spent our detention, where he 'tried to convince me otherwise'. I can practically see ourselves, sitting there. Laughing, talking and flirting, falling deeper into whatever we were.

"You're such a fool, Lily." I say to myself with a sigh.

"That I'm afraid you are, Evans." A voice says from the door. I hopefully glance up, only to find a Marauder I wasn't expecting.

"Sirius?" I inquire.

He nods. "Evans."

"You know," Sirius starts, pulling out a chair. He turns the chair and sits on it facing me, so his legs are around the back-rest.

"Though you might not have to deal with James after your" he gives a gesture "fights or whatever…" he hesitates and looks me in the eyes.

"I do." He finishes.

I squirm guiltily.

"So," He puts his elbows on the back-rest, and puts his head in his hands, squishing up his face "are you going to tell me what happened, and for Merlin's sake, why it happened?"

"Uh…"

He gives me a look.

"Well, I-um, he-"I stop, not seeming to be able to construct a sentence.

"You're breaking my boy, Lily. And I don't like it."

He hesitates, but I don't know what to say.

"So, I need to know, do you have feelings for James?"

I hesitate.

It's time to stop lying to myself.

"Y-yes." I stutter.

He smiles slightly.

"Thank Merlin; I've been waiting six years to hear that. And Lily,"

I look up at him, and he looks at me seriously (no pun intended).

"I think James has been to."

I suddenly form some Gryffindor courage, standing up as I speak.

"I really, really like him, Sirius! I want to tell him, but I'm afraid, okay! We haven't even gone out on a date, had our first kiss on a date, he hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend either. We haven't done anything conventionally, like normal people. And I'm afraid that maybe that know he's gotten to know me, maybe he doesn't think I'm worth asking out and actually following through, or that maybe I'm just a snog on the side and nothing more! All I want to know is where we are because if he asked me to be his girlfriend, I would probably say yes!" I all of shout towards the end, frustrated.

Sirius on the other hand is grinning.

"Evans, you truly are a fool." He says, shaking his head. He stands up and puts hands on either side of my shoulders.

"That boy is mad for you. He would do anything for you. And that, I admit, worries me, because he would break himself just to make you happy. And him not asking you out? If he thought you were ready, he would've already asked you to marry him! The only reason he hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend is because he's unsure of what you want. Make that clear to him, and he'll follow you round like an annoying puppy, I swear!" He laughs.

"And Lily, it doesn't matter that you didn't go on a 'date', because it isn't about the environment, it's about the people. Ew. I sound so unmanly right now."

I laugh.

"You guys are not 'normal'. You're better than normal! You guys smile at each over like you have shared some sort of secrets, and said things that has etched in each over's memories. I don't know about you, but it seems better than wearing matching T-shirts by my standards."

I give a small smile.

"Thanks, Sirius. I'll figure it out soon."

"Good."

James' POV

I head to DADA with Remus and Peter. The class is basically full, and I sit next to Sirius at the front.

"Where were you this morning? I woke up and you were gone, it's not like you." I say, confused. Sirius is the type of person who will get up ten minutes before class, and the only day he gets up early is Christmas morning.

He gives a small smile.

"Awww, my heart's touched. Did wee little Prongsie worry about me?" He says, eyelashes flickering innocently.

I nudge him and he snickers.

"Sirius, did you read the news? A wizard supposedly killed a three Muggles in London!"

"Crap." We mutter together in unison.

"Yeah, they're looking for him everywhere."

"Good morning, class. Today, we will be learning about Dementors. Can anyone tell who the Dementors are controlled by, and what they are used for?"

I look back, and Lily's hand shoots into the air quicker than her competitors. I smile.

"Miss Evans?"

"Dementors are currently controlled by the Ministry of Magic- they serve many purposes- but their main job is to guard Azkaban prison."

"Yes, Lily! Well done! Five points to Gryffindor!"

I dozed off, knowing how the class would run for a while. A question, Lily answers, a question, Lily answers. I always found that made me chuckle.

"So today, we will be trying to do a quite advanced spell for someone of your age." My head perks up.

"The Patronus Charm takes the form of an animal which represents your soul, and protects you from harm from Dementors. Though Dementors are in control of the Ministry, they are quite vicious if you get in their way. Okay, everyone. Standing up, wands away. Repeat the following; 'Expecto Patronum'.

"Expecto Patronum." Repeats the class.

"Very good! To form a Patronus, you need to think of a memory, a strong and happy one. The best you can remember! Everyone got one?"

I think of Halloween with Lily- in the closet, dancing…

"Okay, everyone find some space, and begin!"

"Uh, okay. Expecto Patronum." Nothing.

"Expecto Patronum!" Still, nothing.

For minutes nothing happens. I stand there, and close my eyes. I think of Padfoot, Moony, Wormtail and I in the common room, laughing. I picture kissing Lily in the closet; her lips and her neck. I remember dancing with her and the moment when I asked her out.

I smile. And she said yes.

"Expecto Patronum!" I all of shout, and someone- a girl- says it right before me. A wispy sort of light emerges, and out of it, a Stag.

I grin.

Prongs!

Prongs starts to run, and I laugh. It runs over to the other side of the classroom, where someone else had got it as well.

Everyone was clapping for me and the girl.

I get closer and see red.

Oh, of course it's Lily.

"Well done Lily! Thirty points to Gryffindor!" The teacher sees me, and Prongs.

"Alas, it appears another has done it! Well done, James. Twenty points to Gryffindor!"

When I make my way through the crowd, I finally see Lily's Patronus.

I suck in a breath.

A Doe.

Lily's Patronus is a Doe.

"But… that means…" I look towards my Patronus, which dashes towards Lily's. Prongs gently rubs his face on the side of the Doe's face lovingly.

Lily's my soul mate.

The class quietens, and the soon seem to realize.

I look at Lily, stunned.

She stands there in shock, her face contemplating what this could mean. Her head snaps up to our Patronuses, then to me.

She looks at me with wide eyes and says "You're...you're..." and bolts out the class.

I snap out of it.

"Wait! Lily!" I cry after her, but I react quickly.

I look at Sirius. "Map!" I say, and he throws it.

And I run.

Lily's POV

"Good morning, class. Today, we will be learning about Dementors. Can anyone tell who the Dementors are controlled by, and what they are used for?"

I quickly answer her question out of habit, because the fact is etched into my brain, I don't even have to think about the answer. My mind wanders to the things Sirius said.

'You're breaking my boy, Lily. And I don't like it.'

I wince at the thought.

Am I hurting him? I mean, how could I be? Well, I suppose we need to sort out a few things; where we are and some rules we need to establish. And by rules, I mean like… how far we could go…and stuff…

I must be blushing red by now.

'If he thought you were ready, he would've already asked you to marry him!'

But I'm not ready.

God, is he already there? How can we ever be on the same page if his feelings are so strong for me? How can we ever have the same feelings if he's already fallen in love with me?

Am I in love with him?

Well, I definitely have feelings for him, but I don't know about love.

I think I'm falling in love, though.

I have to talk to him about this.

Merlin, this will be awkward.

"So today, we will be trying to do a quite advanced spell for someone of your age." My head perks up.

"The Patronus Charm takes the form of an animal which represents your soul, and protects you from harm from Dementors. Though Dementors are in control of the Ministry, they are quite vicious if you get in their way. Okay, everyone. Standing up, wands away. Repeat the following; 'Expecto Patronum'.

'Expecto Patronum' I say, droningly with the rest of the class.

"Very good! To form a Patronus, you need to think of a memory, a strong and happy one. The best you can remember! Everyone got one?"

I know I do.

"Okay, everyone find some space, and begin!"

I've read so much about Dementors, I'm confident I'll get it within a few goes.

I smile, chin up. "Expecto Patronum." I say precisely.

Nothing.

Huh?

I furrow my eyebrows.

"Expecto Patronum!" I say again.

Nothing still.

After about ten tries and five minutes, I'm about to give up.

I take a deep breath.

I think of Hestia, Marly and I in our dormitory, eating Berty Botts and laughing at each overs dare. But more than that, I remember James.

James picking me up and kidnapping me, kissing me in Hogsmeade, the closet, dancing…

It had all been so good.

I smile and feel a sort of warth spread over me, and I know I've got it.

"Expecto Patronum!" I exclaim, and a wispy light comes out of the end of my wand, and emerges from it…

A doe.

It's beautiful.

"Expecto Patronum!" Shouts a boy, somewhere, and I'm guessing from his laugh, I suspect he's got it too.

People gather around my Patronus, clapping and muttering things like 'Wow!' 'Why couldn't I do that?' and 'Awesome!'

"Well done, Lily! Thirty points to Gryffindor!" She stops, sees something, and says: "Alas, it appears another has done it! Well done, James. Twenty points to Gryffindor!"

I try and fail to see his Patronus.

Damn my in-superior shortness.

James, however, manages to get through the crowd. He sees my Patronus and his jaw drops. He looks at me, back at the Doe, and then seems to think about something.

What's going on?

People give him space for some reason; even they look star-strucked (though Sirius is grinning like a Cheshire Cat, though worry flickers in his eyes). His Patronus dashes past me too quickly to see. I turn around, and I gasp.

James' Patronus- a Stag- cuddles up to my Doe.

I look at James.

I seem to be questioning him with my eyes, but he doesn't realize I am.

'You're- you're my soul mate?' Is all I can say; it doesn't all come out.

Finally unfreezing, I run.

AUTHORS NOTE: Dun dun dun!

Hahaha! It's kinda fun being evil :)

-Seeker