Chapter 5
My face is still flush from what had just happened with Beowulf. As I clear a table I could not help but feel pain slightly. Not only did my body feel sore from losing my innocence I felt oddly different. For some reason I feel more… confident and I feel as though my mind has just collected wisdom that is restricted for only a selective people who are allowed to gather.
I smile to myself as I cleaned the wooden table realizing that I am no longer a girl. When the table is so clean that I can deem it spotless I stand back up only to catch Beowulf who is grinning at me, no one noticing because of the celebration. I cheeks redden and I smile back and slowly move away and go to wait in the hall. Beowulf appears soon later and grins when he sees me sheepishly waiting for him.
He wraps his muscular arms around me and lifts me and I bite back a squeal. I lower my head and cup his cheeks with my hands and kiss him. It was simply to be a kiss good night but the kiss metamorphosis into something else. Something of passion and longing and need. He quickly puts me back down and I try not to pout like a child.
"We must stop here for I will soon need more. And I wish for you and your tired bod to sleep and dream of me this evening, not fill my desires. For you see we have a long journey the next dawn." Beowulf says. My heart and face fall and I try not to weep, at least not in front of him.
That is correct, the man I love and that has tainted me will soon be leaving. Beowulf just stares at me "By we I do not mean You and I or the men and I. By we I am addressing Grendal's arm, the men and you and I, Arietta." Beowulf says. At his words I let my tears fall and his face looks startled.
"Why do you sob? Had I said something to offend you?" he asks and I wrap my arms around him and hold him tightly. "Beowulf I cry in joy not sadness or pain. But in joy." I say between soft sobs. I face him and smile as he wipes away a tear from my face, our gaze an intensity that would make others uncomfortable. He leans back in and kisses me once more but this kiss is sweet slow passion. As our lips mold together our love for each other grows.
He pulls away and presses his lips to my forehead and whispers the words "We leave at dawn. Come of you wish, for there is a place on my ship and a place at my side." He pauses "Good night." He whispers. He starts to pull away but I hold him still and hug him tightly and kiss his cheek. "Good night my love." I say. He smiles at my words and thus we part.
When I go to my room, Beowulf's words start to sink in. Could I truly leave? Leave this dwelling of mine that I have grown since birth? As I cross the room I think can I really cross the same room the path to room everyday till death claims me? Someone pray every night to leave this hall but with lack of husband they can not.
When I reach my bed and see a sleeping Gretla my heart breaks. Can I leave Gretla, my mother all these women who are as if my family. As I lay in my makeshift bed, now in my garments of sleep I could feel an inner war breaking up my heart. Most women here have to watch as their first love of their lives have taken them, loved them and leave them. Having to be trapped here for the rest of their lives nursing a broken heart.
I toss and turn all night long hearing as the men's celebration dies down as the evening gets thicker. When I finally do fall asleep it is light and not to long later I wake up but my mind is cloudy. Why did I wake?
Then I hear it once more a loud bang but his time company by men yelling. I sit up seeing that I am the only one disturbed by the noise in the dark room. I do not even bother to put my hair back up. I just put on a skirt as I run the only thing on my mind is Beowulf's safety.
I loom in the hall's door seeing king Hrothgar on the floor near a bloody body. Before my heart may jump to conclusions Beowulf stands behind him already putting on his mail shirt. What has happened? But then my question is answered. The men speak of how Grendal's mother as come and murdered our king's best mate and of how Beowulf will fight to avenge him, retrieve Grendal's arm and kill the beast.
All the men leave the hall and I deiced I will follow.