setting: episode 4 "Killer Within"

Damnation

Chapter 19 - Reunion

Connor stopped the car right in front of the gates. It was suspiciously quiet this morning, and there were hardly any walkers by the fences. The Irishman turned his head to look at Daryl, who was sitting right next to him on the passenger seat. The hunter had put his feet up on the dashboard and stared out of the window to his right, watching the walkers tiredly. Connor switched the engine off and sighed.

"Looks like they're still sleeping" he murmured and tried to make out any member of their group.

Someone had to keep watch after all. Daryl didn't answer, which was why the blonde turned his head to look at his friend.

"Are ye alright?"

Daryl snorted and finally looked at the man next to him.

"I already told yah. Fuckers are dead. End of story. Move on."

"Aye, but.."

"I said shut up" Daryl spat and glared at the Irishman.

Connor was quite surprised because of this sudden outburst, but decided to leave it be. He snorted and opened the door.

"Alright. Fuck you then" he growled and walked up to the gate in front of their car.

Daryl stayed where he was and just watched his friend. Truth was that he wasn't alright at all. Of course he wasn't. He had watched how a bunch of psychos had raped and murdered an innocent girl right in front of his eyes. She had been just about Sophia's age. The second girl in a row which he hadn't been able to save. During the hour they had been driving back to the prison he had heard her screams and pleas over and over again. He remembered how he had just been sitting there. How he had failed to fight any of them. How Connor had taken out three of them. All on his own. And what had he done? Killed one of them. Just one.

Once again he felt like a complete and utter failure.

All them years I spent trying to make a man outta you, and this is what I get? he remembered Merle's words and got angry.

The hunter kicked the dashboard hard and cursed. He was so furious. So incredibly mad. Daryl hated Connor for making him go to this shithole, hated him for not being the one that had been strapped to the chair. How could this be? How could a whiny asshole, who had been so weak once that he had actually tried to take his own life, be the strong hero of the day? Why not him? He was Daryl Dixon. Everyone thought that he was a tough guy. Rick, T-Dog, hell, even Connor had always respected him because of his strength and will power. He was supposed to be the lifesaver here. He was supposed to be the one who had saved an innocent girl.

Just once he had wanted to be the one who was bringing a girl back home. And here he was. Tending his bloody wrists. Watching how Connor was the one doing all the work again. The world went to shit around them, and they kept losing more and more innocent, good people. And he was just sitting here, crying over some bloody fingers. He growled and clenched his fists. Oh how he hated everything right now. How he hated Connor for the fact that this whiny stupid depressed suicidal asshole was okay whereas he wasn't. This wasn't supposed to happen. His anger was all Connor's fault.

Daryl got up and opened the door. He saw the Irishman by the gate, with both his hands on the wires, trying to open the locks.
The blonde turned his head when he heard how his friend closed the door behind him and approached him.

"Rick 'n co locked it tight. Looks like we gotta make them notice us. What do ye think, should we risk honking te horn?
I don't wanna spend the whole morning out here in the open waiting fer walkers t'attack us.."

"You wanna talk?" Daryl growled and approached his friend.

Connor turned around and frowned.

"Well, aye, sure. If ye wanna..." he gasped when Daryl shoved him back against the fence.

"This is all your fault!" the hunter spat and shoved him again. His friend looked at him, confusion written all over his face.

"What?"

"We went to this fucked up mansion because of you retard! Because you wanted to go into town and I had to come up with an excuse to keep you from going there! And where did that get us?! This.." he spat and showed Connor his bloody wrists. "...and the whole bullshit with the girl wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you!"

The Irishman got angry as well and shoved his friend back.

"What te fuck are ye on about all of a sudden?! I saved yer ass! If it weren't fer me ye would be a human happy meal by now you fucking asshole!"

"They should've got yah instead!" Daryl spat and punched his friend in the face.

Connor grabbed his chin and gave his friend a death glare.

"Well, if ye really think that they should've killed me instead of tha girl then ye should've pulled the trigger when ye had the fucking chance."

Daryl narrowed his eyes and both men just glared at each other, and for a second Daryl considered throwing his friend to the ground and getting into a fight with him. It wasn't that he hated Connor. Now he realized that this wasn't about the Irishman at all. It was about his own failure and frustration in general, and he had to admit that he missed the old times when it had been so easy to let it out on his friend. Almost a year ago. When he hadn't cared about Connor yet. When it had been so easy to let the anger escape through his fists. Part of him was just waiting for the blonde to throw the first punch, and he knew that it just took one more sentence to make it happen.

"Yeah, looks like I should've. Cos you know what? You're the reason innocent 'n good people like the girl get killed. You're the reason I almost got killed. Because you're never fast enough! If you'd been running faster then you could have saved this stupid dog a couple of months ago. If you'd been running faster then you could've saved the girl from getting her throat cut and you could've saved yourself from this bite on your arm! And why'd you think your brother died, huh? Because you're always too fucking slow!" he said and this was all it took.

The Irishman growled and darted forward, making them both fall to the ground. "Shut up!" Connor spat and started punching him hard and mercilessly. For a couple of minutes both men were rolling around on the ground, throwing punches and insults at each other until Connor took over and grabbed Daryl by his vest.

"So maybe I was too fucking slow ta save them, but I saved your ass. You weren't strong enough t'get this shit done on yer own. Now get over it.
And don't you fucking dare talk about m'brother again or I swear t'god 'm gonna kill you next."

Daryl snorted and looked up at the man on top of him.

"Yeah, cos your gonna kill me."

Connor shoved him back against the ground and moved closer to give him a death glare.

"And ye think yer the only one who can try t'kill me and tell me that he wants me dead?"

"Guys?"

Both men glared at each other for a little while longer, then they turned their heads to see what was going on. They could see Glenn and Maggie walking down the road to the gate. Connor turned his head to look at Daryl again and got up with a final shove. Daryl remained on the ground for a second longer and stared up at the sky. He could feel how the anger was fading after their fight. His face and chest hurt because of all the punches, but somehow it was a good feeling. When he sat up he saw that Connor was talking to Glenn and Maggie by the gate.

"Sorry it's taken us so long t'get back here, can ye open the gate fer us?" he murmured and looked at Glenn.

He and his girlfriend were looking at Daryl for a second, then the man on the other side of the gate looked at the Irishman.

"What happened? We were worried sick. Rick wanted to go out and look for you today" he said and unlocked the gate.

Connor sighed and stepped back so they could open the gate.

"Long story. We got ambushed. But we're okay. Considering.."

"And what was the whole rolling in the dirt thing about?" Maggie asked and looked at both him and Daryl.

Connor snorted and turned around to head for the car.

"Just like I said. Long fucking story."

Daryl's mood eventually changed again. The bad thing was that he and Connor didn't talk. Again. Just days after finally talking again after all the drama with the bite and the group they were already back to this again. The silence. The not talking. The being pissed all the time. Daryl still didn't want to leave the group because he liked it here, but Connor was right about one thing. The whole being with the group but at the same time being close friends thing didn't work like it had worked back at the firestation, back at the house or wherever they had spent the winter together.

Soon after both friends had returned to the prison the rest of the group had come outside as well, since Rick wanted to get started on the whole moving cars and bodies thing early. Daryl decided to stay outside, whereas Connor made his way inside the prison to give Herschel the crutches they had brought with them. They moved the bus away from the gate, and the more the hunter thought about their fight the more he came to the conclusion that he had been an ass. It hadn't been his first fight with Connor. He didn't even know how many times they had managed to get into fist fights, but somehow this one felt slightly different.

The hunter knew his friend too well by now, and if there was one character trait that he liked about the Irishman then it was his ability to not be resentful for too long. Daryl looked forward to making it up again, simply because their idea of making it up basically meant not talking about it at all and just going back to their usual jokes and teasing. And maybe it could involve some smokes and some booze. He put the chains away which he had used to tow the bus. Yeah, he knew that it was his turn to make up for it. Especially for the whole brother thing. He hated himself for bringing Connor's brother up all the time. He knew how much it still hurt his friend after all.

"Okay, let's get the other cars in. We'll park them in the west entry of the yard" Rick announced and Daryl nodded and put his hands on his hips.

"Good. Our vehicles camped out there look like a giant vacancy sign" the hunter answered and looked at all the cars that were still surrounding them. He didn't like the idea of them being parked right there. For one because he didn't want anyone to steal them and also because he didn't want any other outsiders to be drawn to the prison, people like the ones he had met yesterday. Just thinking about any of them coming close to their prison, to their women and Carl, made him both angry and nervous. Rick nodded and walked up the hill to point at all the bodies of the walkers they had shot three days ago.

"After that, we need to load up these corpses so we can burn them."

"Gonna be a long day" T-Dog murmured and Rick nodded.

"Yeah. We'll get the others here as well. We need everyone to help so we can get this done today. We'll get firewood first, after that we're gonna pile them up."

Daryl nodded and turned around when he heard how Carol placed herself next to him and started talking.

"Where's Glenn and Maggie? We could use some help" she said and the hunter pointed at the guard tower in front of them.

"Up in that guard tower."

"Guard tower?" Rick asked and looked at the tower as well.

"They were just up there last night."

Daryl snorted.

"Yeah. They let me 'n Connor in this morn. Went straight back up there as soon as we set foot on the this ground. Glenn! Maggie!" he yelled because their whole hanky-panky was getting ridiculous. They waited for a while until Glenn opened the door. Daryl snorted and shook his head when he saw how the man on top of the tower was fiddling about with his pants, bare-chested and hair all over the place.

"Hey, what's up, guys?"

Daryl smirked.

"You coming?"

T-Dog and Rick chuckled, whereas Daryl wanted to mentally slap himself. He hated how Connor was rubbing off on him. Now he was getting started on the whole innuendo thing as well. Part of him regretted that his friend wasn't with them right now, because he was absolutely sure that the Irishman would have a field day this very moment.

"What?" Glenn yelled back and the others laughed even more.

"You comin'? Come on, we could use a hand" Daryl repeated and turned around again to get to their vehicles.

When Connor entered the cell block he saw that Carl was sitting on the stairs. He was working on his gun, and when he looked up the little boy started grinning and got up. "There you are! I thought you left us" he said and approached the Irishman. Connor let out a deep sign as he made his way down the hall. For the first time in his life he was glad to be back inside a prison, a place which he now considered their home. He smirked and patted Carl's hat on his way to Herschel's cell.

"Don't worry little man, I ain't going nowhere" he said and Carl went after him.

Rick's son took a look at the crutches in his hands.

"Where did you get them from? What happened?"

Connor looked at the boy.

"Doesn't matter where I got them from. What matters is that I got 'em, aye? Now, how's our old man?"

"I heard that" they could hear Herschel say from inside his prison cell. The Irishman chuckled and entered the room. The father of the Greene sisters was still lying on the bed, but when he saw Connor he sat up slowly and carefully. Beth and Lori where sitting by his bed, and when Rick's wife saw the blonde she got up and approached him. "There you are! We heard that you got ambushed, are you alright?" she asked and eyed him head to toe. Connor nodded with a tired smirk on his face and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Aye, we did, but it's okay. 'm fine. Daryl's pretty much fine as well. We got ye those, Herschel" he announced and showed the old man the crutches.

"Took you long enough" Herschel grunted and Connor snickered. Lori took the crutches.

"Thank you" she said to the Irishman and gave them to their doctor.

"Just take your time."

Herschel tried to sit up, but when he almost fell both Beth and Connor darted forward to help him.

"Daddy, don't push yourself" Beth said and the Irishman placed a hand on her father's shoulder.

"Woah, easy there, Herschman. Take it easy."

Herschel snorted and kept going.

"What else am I going to do? I can't stand looking up at the bottom of that bunk any longer" he grunted and Connor helped him up. Beth and Lori tried to help as well, with worried looks on their faces. The Irishman wouldn't stop smiling, though. He was proud of himself and Daryl for actually doing something useful for their group, that everything that had gone wrong hadn't been for nothing. He knew that Daryl was still mad at him because of the crutches, that he thought that they weren't worth the effort they had put into this, but the Irishman thought different. Connor knew that Herschel needed crutches if he ever wanted to walk again. He needed to walk in fact, because they could never be too careful and walkers could be attacking them any second now. Crutches could be real lifesavers these days, so of course it had been worth it. It made him angry that Daryl didn't seem to get that. This was also the first time the group really let him near them, and although this was a pretty silly thing it still made him happy. It felt like the group was adjusting to his situation and finally seemed to find his strange immunity useful instead of dangerous and creepy. Connor and Lori helped the old man for a little while longer, and pretty soon Herschel was confident enough and could actually move out of his cell.

"You know, think I'm pretty steady" the old man observed and looked at his helpers to signalize them that he wanted to go on his own.

"That's a good start" Lori said and smiled at both Herschel and Connor. The Irishman nodded as well and patted Herschel's back.

"Aye, that's the spirit. Yer a real fighter! That's what we need!"

"Do you want to take a rest now?" Rick's wife offered and Connor looked at her.

"Now come on, Lori. Look at te man! He's only getting started! I didn't get those crutches fer a five second walk, right Herschel?"

The old man nodded.

"Damn right. Let's go for a little stroll."