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Warning...this chapter is rather angsty...sorry... :(

Enjoy! Happy Reading!

Chapter 6

EPOV

The lot of us arrive back at Godric's home together and I can't help the nagging worry that's pulling at the back of my mind as I notice my Maker's abnormally aloof and morose behavior. Why is it he closed the bond between us? And why is said bond closed down tightly even now that we've managed to free him from that awful place?

I had thought perhaps there was a possibility he could have been tortured by members of the Fellowship and had tampered down the bond between us in an attempt to save me feeling the mirrored pain, but he looks to be mostly unharmed, except for his obvious malnourished state. Something is obviously very wrong with him and I quickly realize I need to find a way to somehow make this better.

"Godric?" I question softly as the group of us make our way through his house together. My Maker glances up to me and the obvious sorrow he holds is shining within the depths of his emerald orbs. Sookie approaches us then, standing before my Maker and the two of them share a meaningful look before Godric glances up to meet my concerned gaze once more.

"Come my child, we have much to discuss," he says softly, taking hold of my hand as Sookie looks between us with a small frown. I can feel her swirling emotions consisting mostly of compassion and distress, managing only to worry me further as Godric begins pulling me forward. Sookie reaches up to pat my arm softly; looking up to me with a sympathetic smile and I give her a questioning look, still wondering about her wordless exchange with my Maker, before I'm being led away.

"What's going on, Master? Why are you shutting yourself off from me?" I question dismally as he leads me towards his large bed, sitting with a soft sigh before patting the bedding beside him, inviting me to join him. I lower to the bed, reaching out to place my hand upon his knee as he looks up to meet my troubled gaze.

"I have caused you much distress, my child, for this I am truly sorry," he tells me, his voice airy and somehow disconnected as I quickly come to realize this is not the same vampire I've shared centuries of love and companionship with, he's obviously deeply troubled and I want for nothing more than to find a way to ease his current sorrow.

"Open the bond once more, Master," I plead as a deep frown settles upon his face. "Let me share your burden, allow me to help you," I beseech as he lets out a deep sigh before nodding lightly. "Fuck," I whisper, falling to my knees before the bed as the bond is suddenly overflowing with overwhelming depression and utter despair.

I clutch my chest tightly, as the troubling emotions are heavy enough to actually be excruciatingly painful, even in a physical sense. I raise my face to meet Godric's sorrowful gaze once more as a deep frown settles upon my face. This is the pain he's been in for so long now? Carrying enough sorrow to bring him to these depths of physical pain? How is he even still standing? And why has he not said a word to me about this before now?

"This is why I have shut down the bond between us, my child," he explains softly as I nod absently, having to work to rise above the seemingly endless waves of desolation crashing over me. Dearest Odin, it's as if I'm drowning in this endless sea of sorrow that my Maker has apparently been carrying alone for who knows how long now.

"Why, Master? Why have you not reached out for me? Why have you been carrying this alone?" I question as he sighs once more, shrugging his emaciated shoulders dismissively. I would do anything for him, surely he must know this, including helping him to carry this painful affliction.

"It was not your burden to carry, my child. What you are feeling now is the weight of my personal sins, my own past discretions I have incurred over the centuries that weigh so heavily upon me," he explains as realization finally clicks in place. No, it can't be. There's just no fucking way, not that, please be anything else, just not that.

"How is it the Fellowship imprisoned you, Master?" I ask softy, fearing I already know the unpleasant answer to my query.

"I went to them willingly," he states firmly as my heart falls to my stomach. Fuck, fuck, fuck! "I had planned on meeting the sun this coming morning at that place, my child," he informs me as I feel bloody tears welling in my eyes. How could he do this? And how is it he's so callous about coming to such a horrendous decision?

"You meant to leave me," I state, shaking my head in disbelief as a deep frown forms upon my Maker's face.

"It was not you I wished to leave behind, my child," he assures me reaching down to brush his fingertips along my jaw, stroking my skin gently. "It is the love I hold for you that has kept me thriving for as long as I have." Hope flairs within me hearing his endearing words. Maybe there's still a chance for me to change his mind.

"So you'll stay with me?" I ask softly, taking hold of his pallid hand before placing a soft kiss to his cool fingertips as he shakes his head lightly.

"I fear I am done for this world, my child," he says as I shake my head, not willing to accept this. There is no way in hell I would let him willingly meet his end. No fucking way.

"I won't let you meet your end, Master. I can't lose you," I tell him as he gives me a sympathetic smile. "I need you, Godric, I love you," I inform him, rising up upon my knees to come face to face with the vampire who made me, the man who means more to me than any other in this world.

"And I love you, Eric," he assures me as I reach out to cup his pale face, running my thumb over the alabaster flesh of his cheek. I lean forward then, pressing my lips against his own to kiss him softly whilst running one hand through his thick, dark mane. An idea occurs to me then and I can't be certain if it will be enough to change these suicidal thoughts of his, but as I'm given little other choice, I decide it's at least worth a try.

"Come, let me care for you, like in our days of old," I beseech, rising to stand before pulling my distraught Maker towards the bath adjoining his room. If he truly is set on ending his life, I hope this may be enough to remind him what he will be leaving behind, hopefully giving him reason enough to stay. I can only hope the love I have for him is enough to ensure as much.

I reach inside the glass stall, turning on the steaming spray before turning back to face Godric once more. I slowly begin unbuttoning his white tunic, grazing my fingers softly over the exposed skin of his chest before trailing the light material over his arms. I lean down then, pressing a soft kiss to his temple as I tug at the strings holding up his pants and let the material fall to the tiled floor before he's helping me to strip away my own clothing, soon leaving the both of us bared to one another.

I take hold of his hand then, leading him into the steaming shower stall and proceed to fill my palm with shampoo before gently massaging the lathery suds into his dark hair, all the while pushing my love and devotion towards him, desperately hoping this will be enough, that these loving actions may somehow manage to prove to him just how much I love him, how much I need him.

Once I'm satisfied his dark locks are thoroughly cleansed, I lead him under the spray before running my fingers through his soaked hair and allow the heated spray to rinse away the sudsy bubbles. A small frown forms then, feeling no difference in his distressing emotions and I quickly shake away my fears, pushing even more of my love into him as I'm far from willing to give up all hope of keeping him with me.

I then lather my palms with his body wash before running my hands over Godric's too pale and emaciated body, having to choke back my tears seeing him reduced to such a pitiful state. I proceed with my loving devotions, running my soap covered hands over his tattooed chest before proceeding to wash the rest of him, caressing my hands gently over every inch of him before joining him under the spray once more to rinse away the white lathers.

"Let me in, Godric," I breathe against his ear, running my hands over the drenched skin of his back. "Let me help you," I plead, pressing my lips to his own, kissing him softly. Bloody tears are welling within my eyes feeing his yet unchanging malaise and I plunge my fingers into his wetted hair, holding his head firmly in place as I deepen our kiss, letting my lips and tongue communicate to him the depth of my emotions.

"I love you, my child, never doubt this," he says, pulling away to he look up to me with the depth of his depression still weighing heavily in his emerald eyes. "But I am afraid my thoughts on this matter remain unchanged."

"Why? Just tell me why you are so lost, so devoid of joy, Master, and we can work together to bring you above this, to bring you back to yourself once more," I find myself pleading once more, still unwilling to let him end his life.

"The reasons are many, my child," he answers softly. "You have felt for yourself the century's worth of regrets and of loss I carry within me, it is too much. I can carry this no longer. I've taught you all I know as your Maker and have every confidence you will strive even without my presence in your life," he tells me as I shut off the water, shaking my head as my anger begins steadily rising within me.

"You can't do this, Godric, I won't allow you to end your life," I inform him firmly, throwing open the shower door. "I will keep you with me by force if necessary," I assure him, grabbing a towel before working to dry his dampened skin.

"Even if you could, why would you ever be so cruel? Why would you subject me to a life of despair? That is not a life worth living and is not a life I care to endure any longer," he throws back as my jaw falls in disbelief.

"So that's it, you're just giving up, throwing your life away along with everyone in it," I spit back in anger, seeing my Maker completely unfazed by my outburst. He casually begins dressing himself once more and my body is trembling with anger to see his complete indifference concerning this grave matter.

"You must let me go my child, but know that the years spent with you made my two thousand years upon this earth worth living," he tells me, reaching up to brush his cool fingers over my jaw.

"Please, please, Godric, don't do this," I plead, falling to my knees before him, more crimson tears flowing down my face as he shakes his head lightly.

"I told you my opinion on this will remain unchanged," he says, raising his face towards the heavens. "Dawn approaches, I must go now," he says, trailing away as if pulled by some unseen force.

"No!" I cry out, jumping to my feet.

"You will remain here, Eric," he demands as I shake my head vehemently. "As your Maker, I command you," he states firmly, rendering my limbs frozen in place as he turns away, leaving me for what I fear will be the very last time.

"Godric, no! Stop!" I cry out, unable to move from my current spot, no matter how hard I try and fight against the unseen force. I continue my pleading cries, soon falling back to my knees in utter despair as I wait for the inevitable, breaking loss of my Maker's true end.

"Eric?" a soft, familiar questions softly. I raise my blood stained face to meet the concerned gaze of Sookie as she rushes into the bath to drop down before me.

"It's Godric," I tell her as her eyes widen in fear. "Please, Sookie, I need you to stop him, try to reason with him, please," I beg as her head bobs fervently.

"I'll do whatever it takes, Eric," she swears before she disappears from sight, leaving me completely helpless to do anything else but pray to the gods that the fey telepath can somehow manage to convince my Maker to live, to not end his undead life, to not leave me forever.