A/N: hello my lovely readers. Thanks again so much for reviewing and following! it means so much to me, really.
Sorry for the late update..
Chapter 10
I must've re-read Ron's letter a dozen times, before I finally my tore my eyes away.
Mistakes happen...
I hope you can forgive me...
He believes this is just a hurdle we will overcome one day and I... I will just magically jump back into his open arms and reclaim my love for him...
But I... I just can't. I see no qualities of Ron for me to actually love him. All he's shown is his jealousy and anger and with the way Harry looked at me as I confirmed the note had been from Draco, it leaves me no choice but to stay away as far as possible.
Another tear trails down my cheek, he really wished I said no. That I hadn't been with Draco, that I've been locked up here at home, focusing on getting better and let the connection between Draco and myself die like Theo said it would...
My heart winces of the thought. It can't go away now. Not when we spent so much time together. If anything, I say it strengthened our bond. Heck, I'm splitting with Ron over it, so that's reason enough that this should work. But I can't get Harry's expression out of my head.
He promised he wouldn't say anything, but I have a feeling Ginny might get it out of him one way or another... the girl is quite persuasive when it comes to her brothers. Ron especially since he's the closest to her by age. I just have to hope that Harry stands his ground...
"Oh Hermione, you're home!"
Mum calls from behind me. I toss the letter to the side and face her.
"Has Harry already left?"
I nod once, "Left about five minutes ago..." my voice is soft as I try not to let my emotions get the best of me, but seeing how concerned my mother looked, I hadn't done a good impression of hiding them very well.
"Bad news?"
Dropping my gaze down. I wait for her to join me on the sofa.
"It depends on how you look at it." Taking a deep breath, I turn to face her. I dread to think what she'll say after I tell her. But I have to. It's the first step if I want her to accept my relationship with Draco, I mean, it would make telling my Father a whole lot easier.
Mum takes a hold of my hand, "Hermione? What's wrong, dear?"
I watch her fingers rub mine, before I meet her eyes. No sense in prolonging it...
"No... nothing's okay anymore."
"You didn't have a set back did you? Did you want me to call the Healer?"
"Oh no, it's nothing like that... it's just..." I take a deep breath, "I've realized... I'm not in love with Ron anymore."
I don't know if Mum heard me, I said it so quietly.
Mum shakes her head, "Now dear you know the Healer said it'll just take time. It's just been a few weeks, you can't rush these things. You'll see."
"No, Mum, it's not... like that"
My heart picks up its pace. She looks really worried now. More worried than I am about my connection with Draco breaking. But I can't... keep this from her.
"Now Hermione, you know-"
"No" I said more forcefully, "It isn't." I regret sounding like I did, as Mum looks hurt. "Sorry, just... please, let me just explain."
Mum gives me a half-smile, and a nod to proceed. My throat suddenly feels dry, and my palms are sweaty. Oh, this was so much easier to go through my head...
"Remember when I said I was going out? Well, I went to see Ron..."
I can tell she wants to say something, but I don't give her chance.
"You know, wondering about Easter, but I... I had to turn him down, saying that I would need another week away. Of course Ron didn't take the news well, and we ended up fighting and be brought up... stuff I didn't want to talk to him about, so then I left. I had full intentions to return back home, but as I got to the Apparition Point, I collided with someone, and ended up landing somewhere else..."
I released a breath before continuing, "I um..." for a moment I debated on telling her the truth, but I quickly realized things wouldn't go well when she found out half my arm was off. I had to fib.
"I couldn't leave the place I arrived in, it had a ward preventing me from doing so, so I... I had to send you a letter,"
"And good that you did, your Father was in a right state when you didn't return home for dinner. Not that I am blaming you, as it was out of your control."
"Mum..."
"Right sorry, please continue"
The dull drum of my heart echoes in my ears, now for the hard part...
I cleared the tickle in my throat and went on, "Right, well the thing is... I was um... with um... a boy." I hear her take a sharp breath, "A boy by the name of Draco Malfoy."
I sit still, trying to gauge her reaction, but Mum remains stoic.
"Would this be the same boy your Healer often mentioned? The one you dreamt of?"
If I weren't so close to her, I swear her lips didn't even move.
I drop my head back down, "He's more than just a dream, Mum..."
Mum leans in closer to me, "What was that dear?"
Straightening my spine, I once again, meet her gaze, "Draco is more than just a dream. I..." my throat is dry once again, "I... I love him."
For the next few minutes Mum says nothing. I feared this would happen, but I couldn't bring myself to lie to her.
"And I get that everyone is trying to stay optimistic about this whole Ron thing... but after spending the weekend with Draco, I can't ignore what my heart wants."
Mum braced herself, "You know your happiness means the world to your Father and I, Hermione." She started to stroke my hair. "We both love you so much, and will always be behind you no matter what. But I think you're taking this... situation a little too much to the extreme."
"What?"
How can she think that and say she's on my side?
Mum studies me carefully, "You're just confused. What you think you feel is just what your Healer said. You may not love Ron now, but... I'm sure given time you will. And as far as the other boy goes... well, it'll pass."
Swallowing I try to will my rapid heart to calm down, she's not getting it!
"No, Mum you're not listening to me!"
"Now Hermione don't be like that! Your Healer told us your feelings for this other boy is only temporary..."
My body tenses at the word. No... not after what happened between us... it won't happen. I won't let it happen! She reaches for my hand again.
"Look, I'm sorry for sounding harsh, but I just didn't want you to get your hopes up Hermione. You have to know, this is temporary...the love you think you feel for this boy isn't anything. The love you have for Ron only trans-"
"I've already slept with him! So don't tell me what I feel for Draco isn't anything!"
Mum's eyes widened, and immediately I bowed my head, ashamed of my outburst. Shoot. I didn't mean to say anything about that especially with my own mother as she is the type to believe that couples should get married first before they are intimate...
But she... she was telling me how I should feel. I thought she understood my situation?
"Um... what was that Hermione? Did... did you cheat on Ron?"
For several minutes, I don't say anything. Cheating would imply that I... felt bad for what I did. For betraying Ron's faith in me, but I don't because I don't feel anything toward Ron. Yet now when you look at it that way, I find it very hard for Mum or Dad to take my side on this...
"Hermione, I asked you a question..." She says, her voice firm.
"I knew you wouldn't understand," I murmur, slouching slightly. She's acting like I'm twelve, not twenty-four...
Mum frowns at me, "I'm trying to, Hermione, I really am..."
"No, you just want me to ignore these feelings and concentrate on getting back with Ron because you believe them to being temporary." Even saying the word myself leaves a foul taste in my mouth. Bitter and grainy.
"But I'm telling you, I can't! It doesn't feel right when I try to do what everyone wants."
A tear escapes my eye, and Mum reaches over to me, "Oh Hermione, don't cry sweetheart"
My heart feels trapped in a vice. Tightening and clutching on each inhale, I fear my chest will capsize upon it, "But it hurts... no one gets it. He loves me!"
"What?"
I sniff roughly, "Draco... he told me he loves me, so... really I can't just, walk away from him, Mum. He wants me in his life as much as I want him in mine!"
"How can he, if you were the one that had the dream?" Mum said frowning. "Hermione you really are taking this way too deep, perhaps you should-"
"NO!"
"Don't yell at me, I'm your Mother!"
"Well you're not listening to me! I just told you he told me he loves me and the first thing you say, is I made it up?!"
"Well look at the facts, Hermione. You were the one with the dream. This... Draco character had no report of being in the hospital, so-"
"Actually he was there, he... he visited me after hours!"
Mum raises one eyebrow, "What?"
"But that's beside the point. You want to know how it's possible for him to love me, and I'll tell you. Really, I'll try to make it as simple as possible, and perhaps after the fact, you will understand where I'm coming from."
Mum purses her lips, her face turning sour. I take a moment to gather my thoughts. Licking my overly dry lips on a few occasions.
"We... as in Draco and myself, are magically connected. It happened at the accident. Usually in those cases, our Aura's, which is the ability for us to have magic, gets affected. Because of the dream I had, my Aura feels bounded toward Draco. And Draco... well he visited me so, he feels the same. But later on, I found out, he too... um... had a dream..."
Of course, explaining to Mum just how Draco and I had the same dream would be... saved for a later time. A much, much later time. Maybe even never.
"The same dream?" Mum says cautiously, "Very rarely people would-oh right, but being of magical status, I suppose it will be normal?"
I nodded once.
"Yes. And yes it's said it is only temporary, but after the weekend..."
I close my eyes. The stabbing ache in my chest subsides, albeit, barely.
"You think because you... were together, it will change?"
I hope so... I really hope so. I'll have to meet with Theo to know for sure.
Then, out of nowhere, I feel myself being pulled into a hug. Her hands run up and down my back, tickling my spine.
"Oh Hermione... I'm sorry, sweetheart"
"Is everything okay in here?" Dad hollers walking into the room. I sniff a few times before lifting my head from Mum's shoulder to greet him properly.
"Yes," Mum says, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear.
"Good, cause lunch is about ready"
And he leaves again. Mum rubs my shoulder gently.
"You don't think it'll happen do you?" I ask, drawing her attention back to my face.
Mum chews her lip, "It's hard to say, your magical world is a very complex place, anything is possible really. Well no, I shouldn't say that..."
"Just... not this, right?"
"Well you're my baby girl, and I feel for you sweetheart. Sex is a huge commitment and if... if the answer ends up being not what you want..."
"I know..." I bow my head and another tear escapes my eye.
"It will be all right, Hermione. I'm with you all the way."
Picking my head up, I stare at her with surprise, "So... you... you're not disappointed in me? You know, for cheating on Ron?"
Mum frowns, "I could never be disappointed in you, Hermione. You're my daughter and I love you with all my heart. We'll get through this, together,"
She pats my leg and then she catches the folded letter on the coffee table, "Oh, what's this?"
She takes the letter before I could reach it. Slouching slightly, I sit here with bated breath as she reads away.
"Why... this is from Ronald," Mum sighs.
I get up from the sofa, keeping my back to her, "It arrived a few days ago... Harry..." I gulp down the sudden nausea, swirling away in my stomach, "Harry stopped by and asked... why it's taken me so long to reply..."
"Is... um, is he aware about what happened on the weekend? With you and-um, Draco is it?"
My eyes fall closed, as I concentrate on my breathing to compose myself. In... and out. In... and out.
"Hermione?"
I jump a little from her sudden voice, before I turn back to face her, "Yes, Harry asked about it, but he... he didn't want to know the story, I guess I can't really blame him for that, he's Ron's best friend. Of course, he may suspect..."
Mum sets the letter down, then she gets up to approach me, "Hermione," she takes a hold of both my hands this time.
"He hates him, Mum. Everyone I know, hates Draco just because of what happened in school, it doesn't matter that he's changed now, all they see is this... immature boy that caused havoc at Hogwarts."
She tucks the strand of hair that fell before my eyes, behind my ear then uses that same hand to cup my cheek. I can feel the tears start to escape my eyes once again.
"It'll be okay, Hermione. We'll take care of this, one step at a time okay? Now... let's have some lunch your father made"
A Few Days Later...
Today before my appointment with Theo, I decided to return to Diagon Alley, to check out my shop with Lavender and Parvati. Running through the possibilities of what it could be. Going by Lavender's directions I am able to locate it without difficulty.
Imagine my surprise, when I see the beauty shop before me.
Strange. I, for one, never really cared for such a thing. I mean, yes, there been the Yule Ball and Graduation, perhaps Ginny and Harry's wedding... but that's pretty much it for me. I never really thought it necessary otherwise. We go to Hogwarts to learn not... pick up boys.
I entered the place and took in the surroundings. We have potions, books, robes, jewellery, the works.
"Hermione!" Parvati cheered. I didn't even realize she was there. "Oh it's such a surprise to see you! I thought... well, I mean with Ron saying you're taking another week off..."
Blinking, I raise one eyebrow to Parvati, "Ron? What do you mean... he... was he here?"
Parvati nodded, "He just left about ten minutes ago. Thought to um, keep us up to date about you before he set off to the Ministry."
"Right... of course" I say more to myself than her as I flash back to his letter... and of how... sorry he was for making assumptions about Draco... trying to convince himself that what we have is anything worth salvaging...
The response letter proved to being quite the challenge. Luckily I had Mum with me and she told me just to keep it simple.
"Well actually I am just stopping by before I head off to St Mungo's for my follow-up appointment. You know, he might let me work this week"
That had been a blatant lie. I haven't planned on coming back to work... not yet anyway.
"Hermione!" Hollered Lavender as she joined Parvati's side. She's grinning like the Cheshire Cat, "I found out about something very interesting..."
Staring at her, I'm not sure what to make of her expression, only to know it's never a good thing. Parvati's body shakes eagerly, "Ooh, do tell!"
She looks right at me, "Remember that harpy from Slytherin, you know, Pansy? She's one of our regular customers, and I mean by owl post only, anyway, turns out she was in Diagon Alley the other day... or was it the weekend?"
For a second, Lavender poised herself, tapping her chin thoughtfully, "Eh, I can't remember. Anyway, she was with that skank Greengrass, can't remember her name starts with a D or was it an A?"
"Daphne was in our year," Parvati added. "Astoria is her sister, two years younger"
Lavender rolled her eyes, "Whatever still not important! Anyway..." she gave me a sly smirk.
"She said Draco turned her away because, he was with Hermione!" Lavender grinned, "Remember how I told you she ran up and hugged him? Well... I suppose the feeling's mutual when it comes to the two of you if he turned Pansy away!" Lavender winked.
Parvati frowned, "But what about Ron? He was just here and said you needed more time off and..." she gave me a timid look.
Folding my arms, "It's... nothing really." Telling my Mum about Draco is one thing... these two, completely out of the question!
"Just had a little mishap, you know-"
"She said you were bleeding everywhere!"
I see both Parvati's eyes and mouth pop open. "Merlin's beard, are you okay?"
"Obviously if she's walking about!" Lavender snapped, "But the main question is, why did I have to find this through Pansy? We're your best friends, Hermione!"
That bit of information scares me. The only time I really spent with these girls in the dream were at on my hens night.
Parvati, "Well what I like to know is why are you spending time with Malfoy in the first place? Shouldn't you be focusing more time and energy on Ronald?"
Lavender drummed her fingers on her chin, "Yes, but have you seen Malfoy lately? Can't say I blame the girl!" Lavender winks at me again.
Parvati snarled, "You're not helping the situation, Lavender!"
"Oh hogwash! I mean Seamus did bring it to my attention just a few days ago and-"
I tune the rest of her babble out once I hear Seamus' name. Since when does Seamus know about my business? And why would he be discussing it with her?!
But wait... Ronald had mentioned that he worked with Seamus in Auror training... and he was rather annoyed after I forgot about his ring...
A ring I still have yet to wear...
Did he run his mouth off about our problems? It's bad enough I had to deal with Harry... I can only imagine what Ginny would do if she ever found out.
I am very grateful that the store isn't busy, nor are any of our customers nearby to actually hear our conversation...
"I believe it's about that time for my appointment," I grit, nodding off to Parvati and then to Lavender. She isn't that thrilled.
"Hey, don't you run off! We have important matters to discuss!"
"Well frankly, I don't really care what you want. I'm out,"
And with my head held high, I storm out of the place. Great, now I feel much more stressed since I woke up.
I take two steps before St Mungo's and then out of nowhere, my body tenses and I find myself frozen mid-stride.
I... I've been hit with the Body-Binding Curse. But... who? And why so close to the hospital?
"So Mudblood," Sneers a harsh voice. I know that voice from anywhere...
Pansy. She stalks around me like a vulture ready to attack, her head tilted and her eyes ablaze.
"You think you can traipse into my life and steal my boyfriend, huh?!"
Sucking on my own lips I really try to pry them open, but it's no use. My tongue's glued to the roof of my mouth.
Pansy took two more steps to bridge the gap between us, so close, I can see her nostrils flaring, "That because he helped you, gives you the right to put your grubby paws all over him?! Well let me tell you, Mudblood. Your little fantasy is over. Draco... Draco is mine. Always has, and always will be. And after today, consider yourself gone!"
She looks so determined when she says that... My eyes catch her fingers playing her wand.
She wouldn't... no... no she can't! Not with so many witnesses about!
"Best of all," Pansy said gleefully, raising her chin, "I can't wait to see the look on your face once he tosses you off like the grub that you are!"
She spat the last words so harshly, I even felt her saliva hit me in the face.
She brandished her wand back and forth like a metronome and giggled. The sound harsh and biting like nails on a chalk board. Irritating my ear drums and sparking the hairs on my neck. It reminded me of Umbridge, whenever she did her little 'coughs' to gain attention.
Pansy pushed back the fallen hair from her face. "Oh and don't even think about going back to him. I've already set up new wards so... " she shoots me an evil grin, that of a shark, "Tah-tah!" and then she stalks off.
The seconds tick by or minutes, I couldn't be sure, just that no one around seems to notice that I am frozen in time.
She didn't cast a Disillusionment Charm on me did she? I didn't think Pansy would be wise enough for such a thing...
Upon my wayward thinking, Pansy had released from the spell. My arms go slack and my knees buckle from under me, propelling my body forward awkwardly. A pair of hands wrap around my middle, preventing me from falling into the steps head first.
The arms tighten and I find myself pulled backward. I look over my shoulder at my saviour.
"Ginny?"
She rubs my shoulder, "You all right? You almost had a nasty spill there,"
"Oh... it was nothing. Just... tripped"
I didn't want to bring her my problems. It's bad enough having to deal with Lavender and Parvati... but I know from the look on her face, she doesn't believe me.
"What?"
Ginny folds her arms, "Okay Hermione, I get that you don't want to spend time with Ron or... Harry or any of us for that matter, but you're my best friend. I can tell when you're hiding something from me,"
"But I'm not,"
She raises one eyebrow from me, "Well Harry surely didn't want to talk about it, and well, we girls don't almost faint for nothing!" She looked around quickly and then leant toward me, "Are you pregnant?"
The word hits me like a bucket of ice. Chilling my blood and numbing my bones. Where the heck did she come up with that?
"Well it's obvious isn't it?" She points to the doors of St Mungo's. "Why else would you be visiting St Mungo's if it weren't for the possibility that you'll be a mother?!"
"How could I, if I've been in a coma for an entire month?! I doubt they would've given me any treatments if I was with child!"
I shudder to think, that I could be carrying Ron's baby...
"Those things are easily missed, especially early on, and well the only treatment you got was just a Calming Draught, which they recommend for regulating your stress levels!"
"I'm not pregnant!" I hissed, my fists tensing, "Nor will I ever become pregnant! I mean, not until after marriage you know, like it should be!"
Ginny's expression hardened, "Don't yell at me! I just happen to know the signs, you know being pregnant myself and such. So don't-"
"Pansy cast the Body-Bind Spell on me!" I snarled, I really didn't want to tell her this, but with the way she's going on about the stupid baby business, I have no choice in the matter.
"Okay? So no, I wasn't fainting. In fact I haven't been with Ron like that for... for some time, so stop it!"
It brought me back to the time in the dream when she voiced why I hadn't been pregnant after she announced hers with Blaise Zabini...
But now, she's pregnant with Harry's baby... weird how similar those situations are...
Wait, what if she brings this little incident to Harry? Oh God... no she can't! It would just... be really awkward, never mind the fact that Draco used the Contraceptive Charm, just knowing that Harry would find out...
No. He won't.
"Pansy? You... what?"
Ginny's voice breaks me out of my reverie. Acting casual, I fold my arms and sigh, "Yes, she was here, showed up out of nowhere and we had words... or rather she stunned me so she could sneer at me"
I'm worried of what Pansy would do to keep Draco close...
"Anyway I am here to visit my Healer, about my progress, you know... to see if I'm fit to go back to work and all that"
Ginny frowns, "Oh..."
Her soft words sadden me.
"Right so... there would be no need to mention any of this to Harry okay?"
"I never bring our conversations to Harry. It's not his business what we girls talk about!" She takes a hold of my hand, "Come on, I'll walk with you,"
"What of your appointment?"
"Okay so I'll walk you half way to your Healer then,"
Theo's Office
I'm worried. Very... worried. It's been five minutes and Theo has yet to say anything. To write anything. Had I been wrong in telling him about what happened with Mum and Draco? That leaving Ron would be the best?
Silence.
My ears are picking up on the smallest of noises. Let it be the gentle chirping of the birds outside, the harsh whipping of the ceiling fan against the ceiling, or the air entering through my nostrils... it all here, amplified, echoing around me.
I will myself to voice my concern, but... nothing but a high-pitch squeak, passes my lips.
Theo runs his hand over his face, as though pained, "Actually... your mother's right" he shifts uncomfortably, "Um, intimacy doesn't improve the bond, despite the emotions involved. Aura Bonds don't have that, it'suh, more complicated then that actually. And it pains me to say this but the bond is temporary, Hermione...and going by your recent Aura levels...you don't have much time"
He said that so casually and... disjointed, my skin feels riddles with spiders and my pulse stops, leaving most of my body colder than ice. Complicated...? How is it complicated?
"What? How long?"
Theo lets out a ragged breath, "There's no easier way to say this..."
At this, I feel the last piece of hope in my heart, shatter away. They always say eyes were the gateway to the soul, and Theo's mirrored my emotions.
"Twelve hours until your love for Ron returns."
I feel the sickness rush back full force. Less than a day?! I... I have... my head swirls and my vision blurs. Chaos. Complete, and utter chaos consumes my mind. My brain is throbbing.
"No..."
The tears well in my eyes and I curl my arms around my middle, quelling my swirling stomach. The tears are hot against my skin, like razor blades. Digging and scraping their way down my cheeks.
"No..."
"Hermione, I'm-"
"NO!"
E/N: Oi that conversation with her mother took the longest to sort out, so hope it was okay. Heck, I hope the entire update was okay..