Daryl woke up the next morning sprawled on the couch with a pot on his chest. He had to piss, really badly. "What the fuck?" he grumbled, moving the pot to the coffee table beside him. It wasn't until he stood up that he realized he was completely naked. And it wasn't until he'd taken a few steps that everything came flooding back. The party. The alcohol. Carol dropping him off. The flirting. And the worst of all… Had it really happened? Was he really that stupid? Had he really let her see him naked?
His face was burning as he leaned over the toilet and relieved himself. Halfway through his pee the phone rang. Daryl didn't rush to finish - he had no plans to answer it. He didn't want to talk to anyone - especially not her. Oh God… how am I ever going to face her again? he wondered.
He was going to have to face her of course since they were going to be working together. He could only avoid her so much. But the worst part of it all - he didn't want to avoid her. The thought of not spending time with her was heartbreaking. But he couldn't. He just couldn't. Why not? A voice popped into his head. You've seen her naked too. You're even now.
Daryl finished peeing, flushed the toilet and immediately turned on the shower. He could hear the phone ringing again, but of course he ignored it. By the time he stepped into the tub his dick was already getting stiff because he was having flashbacks of Carol, naked, in the very same shower. He put his body under the hot water and grabbed his dick. If there was ever a time he needed to relieve some stress it was right then. He knew he shouldn't but he pictured Carol's amazing tits and imagined what it would be like to hold them, suck her nipples, and rub his cock between them over and over again.
Daryl stroked his dick and let the feelings of guilt and embarrassment float away. He focussed on how good it felt and even allowed himself to imagine what it would be like to fuck Carol. It had been a long time since he'd had sex but he was no stranger to masturbation. He could make himself come quickly when he needed to, but Daryl decided to have a lingering shower and enjoy jerking off while fantasizing about a woman he really shouldn't be thinking about in that way.
He soaped up his dick and enjoyed the way his hand glided easily up and down his shaft. Carol's pussy would feel wet and slick too, he was sure of it. Hot, tight… As his fantasies got dirtier and more vivid he started to stroke faster and faster. He bent and braced himself against the shower wall with one arm, beating off furiously. "Oh," he grunted as he finally came, pleasure rippling through his entire body.
Daryl quickly finished up his shower, brushing his teeth while he was in there. Merle thought it was gross but Daryl didn't give a fuck. He got out, towelled off and then wrapped the towel around his waist. It was probably the longest shower he'd had in a long time and he'd really hoped it would help him forget about what was stressing him. It worked - until he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and saw… his scars.
"Fuck," Daryl hissed. Why hadn't he even thought of that? He was so concerned with his damn dick that it hadn't even crossed his mind that she had seen the scars on his back. No one had seen them in years, not even Merle. Daryl had kept them hidden and kept his story to himself. That was why he was so angry with Merle for telling the producers. He should have been preparing himself for the truth to come out as part of his character's story on the show, but Daryl had been hoping and praying they wouldn't use that information at all.
Now Carol knew. Would she look at him with pity? Would she be angry with him for not telling her when she shared her abusive past? Daryl was catastrophizing. All he could think of was every single awful possible reaction she could have. In the end it came down to one thing - he was going to lose her friendship. It was over. It was all over now because he was an idiot. His mind didn't even consider the possibility of her empathy and understanding. He could only see the bad.
Daryl looked at his face in the mirror and all of a sudden in a moment of rage he punched the glass. "Fuck," he yelled, both in anger and pain. The mirror shattered and when it did it sliced a deep gash in his arm. Blood. A lot of blood. And a searing pain. He could handle the pain and blood didn't bother him but he hated hospitals. He had to get the bleeding to stop.
Daryl grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his arm tightly on his way to the kitchen. He had to find gauze and bandages but before he made it there was a knock on the door. "Dammit," he growled. He couldn't answer wearing nothing but a towel so he ignored it and went into the kitchen hoping whoever it was would go away.
"Daryl?" A voice called out. "Are you here? Are you okay?"
Oh this day just keeps getting better, he thought. Carol. She was here. And clearly he hadn't bothered to lock the door last night so she was inside the house. "Go away," he snarled.
"Oh thank God, you're alive," she replied, actually sounding relieved. "So you were just ignoring my calls."
"Go away," he called out again, hoping she would just damn well listen.
"Don't be an ass," she replied, sounding closer. "Oh my God… is that blood?" All of a sudden there she was in the doorway. "Jesus, Daryl… what did you do?" And now she was right beside him, touching him - deep concern etched on her face. "Can I see?" She asked.
"Told you to go away," he grumbled. But it was meek this time and he found himself unwrapping the towel to show her.
"Oh it's bad," she said, quickly covering it up again. "Come, sit," she ordered.
"I need clothes," he mumbled, hoping the towel would stay put.
"Didn't seem to need them last night," she teased. Daryl felt his face burn. "I'm sorry," she added quickly. "I won't tease. I want to so bad… but I'll behave - I promise." Carol held the towel on his arm, putting pressure on the cut. "You're gonna have to go get stitches," she said.
"No," Daryl snapped. "No hospitals. I ain't going."
"I'll go with you," Carol offered. "I don't like them either," she added, giving him a look. What was that? Understanding? She didn't like hospitals either… she knew how he felt? Nah, he had to be reading her wrong. All the bad stuff would come out soon. Just as soon as they dealt with his stupid arm. She was gonna be mad. She was gonna leave. He was trying to push her away so he didn't have to deal with the pain and disappointment.
"I ain't going to the hospital," he said again.
She didn't argue. "So what did you do?" She asked.
"Cut it on some glass," he mumbled.
"Where's the glass? I'll clean it up," she offered.
"No," he said quickly. A little too quickly.
"Daryl?" She narrowed her eyes. "What happened? Tell me."
"I punched the mirror," he said really soft and really fast. But it didn't matter, she heard every word.
"What? Oh my God. Why?" She gasped.
"I was mad," he shrugged.
"Please tell me this has nothing to do with last night," Carol said, pressing harder on his arm. He didn't know what to say so he didn't reply. "Daryl, seriously?" She snapped. "This was pretty damn stupid."
He was starting to get angry. "Just go," he growled. "I'll deal with it." He tried to pull his arm away.
"Stop it," she insisted, holding him tight. "You're gonna make it worse," she snapped. "Don't move." They were both silent for a few minutes. "Got any medical tape? I can try making butterfly stitches if we can get the bleeding to slow down enough."
"Cupboard above the sink," Daryl replied. "You really think that will work?" He added shyly.
"I've done it before," she replied. "Ned split my forehead open once. I got so sick of going to the hospital and making up stories that I started to look things up on the internet and patch myself up on my own." Daryl felt sick to his stomach listening to her story. He wished he had beat the shit out of that fucker when he had the chance. "I watched a video and tried it. Surprisingly it worked and I barely have a scar." Daryl couldn't see one at all. She lifted the towel. "Oh good, it seems to be slowing. Hold that," she instructed him. Daryl took over putting pressure on his arm while she got up and found the medical kit.
"I wanna make a deal," she said, as she sat back down and started to root through the kit. "If I do this for you and save you a trip to the hospital I want something in return."
Daryl eyed her, wondering what it could possibly be. He grunted, "What?"
"I just want to talk," she replied. He watched as she lifted the towel off and started to work. The alcohol stung as she cleaned the wound, but he held still. "I don't want what happened last night to ruin our friendship…" She paused and looked at him. "We're friends?" Carol was looking for confirmation. He nodded. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. But I just need to know we aren't going to lose the friendship we developed." Carol started working with the tape. "I've lost a lot in my lifetime… I can't lose you too."
When she looked up and he saw the tears in her eyes he found it hard to breathe. This was the last possible way he would have ever expected her to react. Why wasn't she angry with him? Or looking at him with pity? He was exposed again, sitting there with no shirt on, but the urge to cover himself was slowly fading. "'Kay," he replied. "Deal."
They were both silent while she finished patching him up. "Well here's hoping that will work," Carol said. "I'll have to change it in a couple days." Daryl didn't mind. It meant they had a reason to see each other.
"It was a pretty fucking dumb move," he mumbled softly.
"Why were you so mad?" Carol asked him gently. "Can you at least tell me that?"
Daryl shrugged and sighed. She was going to think he was stupid if he told her. Oh what the hell she probably already thought he was stupid. "I thought you were gonna be mad at me."
"What?" Carol gasped "Why on earth would I be mad at you?"
The way she was so shocked made him feel even more stupid. How could he possibly get things so wrong? He shrugged and mumbled. "'Cause I didn't tell you about stuff…"
"Oh my God, Daryl…." She reached out and touched his hand. "I would never expect you to tell me anything you don't want to. I would be happy to listen and support you if you ever do tell me, but I don't have to know. It doesn't change anything."
"It doesn't?" He asked, risking a quick look at her face. Everything that came out of his mouth sounded so stupid.
Carol continued to hold his hand and for once in his life he didn't feel like pulling away from someone's touch. "I spent a lifetime hiding things from people. My family. The few friends that I had. I pushed everyone away to protect my secret. I get it. Trust me. So that's why I don't need to know. I don't want you to push me away."
Daryl didn't know what to say. But he didn't feel like he had to say anything. She squeezed his hand and then released him.
"Go get dressed," Carol said, standing up to put back the first aid stuff. "I have a feeling you're not gonna be impressed with where we're going, but you can indulge me just this once." She smiled. "I'll owe you one sometime. Hurry though, I don't want to be late."
Daryl found himself getting up and doing exactly what she instructed. He had no idea where they were going and it wasn't like him to just go with the flow like that. It wasn't like him to let someone else tell him what to do and react without the least bit of resistance. But Carol - she could do it. And he... Actually enjoyed it. Anyone else… anyone else and he would have fought it. But not her. Never her.