A/N: So sorry it's taken me a while to get this posted. I always find the middle of the story the hardest to get through. And even worse when it's a little angsty and shorter than the other chapters. Oi.
Thanks for the reviews/faves/follows :) and of course, reading my creation!
Chapter 15
My jaw hit the floor.
Draco had created a new and improved Wolfsbane Potion, where it actually prevents the Werewolf transformation. Of course the person still carries the virus, but they won't ever change, they will stay human on the full-moon.
"Wow, that's amazing, Draco." And that's the truth.
His lips crack into a smile, and I feel a sharp pull in my stomach. God, have I missed that smile. Missed Draco actually.
There wasn't a day that went by where I didn't think about him in these past two weeks. I mean, with Ron out of the picture...
Ron.
Ugh even saying his name now still has me feeling rather... broken. Most of the time I've been okay with what's happened between us, that I can actually focus on my daily life. But the other days... the days I wanted to ignore, and cower away in shame from. I found the pain of my betrayal unbearable to the point where I find it difficult to crawl out of bed. Pleading to some non-entity to claim my life, as I miss having Ron in my life that much.
It was gutting, really. Foul to the point that I felt the rotten taste linger in my mouth for most of those days. Like Bellatrix was casting the Cruciatus Curse continuously all over again.
I shudder violently from that memory.
I never felt so weak in my whole life. Where in those fragile moments of my depression, I would find myself writing letters to Ron, barely legible and sodden with tears, all begging me for a second chance. Until my conscience gets the best of me, informing me how a cheater never gets that chance, and I end up burning those letters seconds after, feeling more disgusted with myself than when I started with.
It haunted me, truly. The whole situation just haunted me. Hurting the people I love to the point where Harry's written words of promise, would turn into some kind of cruel mockery, telling me how I'm dead to them, how much better they are without me in their lives.
It all just... drained me where nothing good left remained. Like a shell. At times, I didn't even want to look at myself in the mirror. I been that disgusted with myself. My stomach would turn and the bile would reach up my throat.
Yes, dark times indeed, where no amount of Calming Draughts would save me.
But it was thinking about Draco had been my saving grace. He and Theo both actually. Theo for obvious reasons, and Draco... the prospect of getting my chance with Draco greatly improved my mood. Especially with the Wand Oath set in place.
I still can't believe Harry and Ron went through with it. How it all been for my benefit.
Me.
Draco.
Draco reaches over and takes a hold of my hand, breaking me of my reverie, "Something wrong?"
My eyes lock on our entwined hands, his thumb is gently rubbing against my knuckles. It's so nice and soothing.
"Sorry," I mumble, watching as his smile fades away. "Didn't mean to worry you. I was just lost in thought for a moment there."
I stare into his grey eyes for a long moment. I can see his concern for me. The same kind I saw in our dream so many times.
"About what?" his voice matches his touch. Soft and gentle, sending electric jolts down my arm and straight to my heart-strings. My chest swells and I find myself gripping his fingers tightly between my thumb and forefinger.
I take a deep breath. I really didn't want to bring up Ron, not when we're having such a nice time. But I can't find the heart to just lie to him either. So I settled for the half-truth.
"Missing my friends."
I can start to feel the ache again. Like a moth drawn to a flame. But this time I quickly discard it. I will not let those dark emotions ruin my first evening with Draco. My... date with Draco.
Draco with his beautiful grey eyes and winning smile.
"And you," I quickly add, my voice is quite higher than normal, and I find myself blushing. "I've missed you a fair bit these past fourteen days."
I see his smile return and he squeezes my hand.
"I've missed you too,"
The waiter comes by with our tab, to which Draco pays without hesitation.
Yes dinner had been exquisite. He took me to my favourite restaurant! How he came about such information I will never know. Not even Theo knows this!
Draco gets up, offering me his hand, "Come on, there's somewhere else I want to take you."
"Draco..."
"Come on love, the night is young, I've been away for far too long and I want to make it up to you."
I take a deep breath in an attempt to calm my nerves. Where else could he want to take me? And since when is two weeks too long?
I slip my hand in his and he pulls me up to my feet. He further grabs my coat and slings it over my shoulders.
We are on our way out when two people walk in. Parvati and Dean.
"How utterly disgusting," Parvati said sharply, folding her arms, "You and Ron have split for what, two weeks and already you're having it off with Malfoy?"
Her words strung me. It's not wrong. Ron ended our engagement. I betrayed him and it's very clear, we won't get back together. So why should I refuse to live? I am no longer his.
Dean held Parvati back, "Hey, don't be hurtful," He said.
Parvati snorted and then rounded on him, "So what you actually approve of this mess?" She pointed right at me. "She broke Ron's heart and now she's off flaunting it like she doesn't give a damn"
No... it's Ron who doesn't - NO - I refuse to let those emotions attack me again. It's bad enough I let them tease me just a few minutes ago. No, this is how it is, and will be from now on.
Me and Draco. A man who truly loves me. A man, who I want in my life more than anything. If it costs me Parvati's friendship, then so be it.
I can't impress everyone. Not that I aimed to do such a thing.
"I'm not flaunting anything!" My chest has grown heavy and my heart hurts. Draco gives my hand another reassuring squeeze.
Parvati glared at me and then sneered at Draco. "And yet you are here with a man who ruined years of a good thing. You're a terrible human being, Hermione Jean Granger! A user and an abuser..."
"Back off, Patil," Draco growled. And I can feel the knuckles of grinding against one and other as my hand grows numb.
"Draco," I hadn't meant to sound as weak as I did, but it just hurt so bloody much, "You're hurting me."
His eyes flash right to my face and then down to my hand. Swallowed and being crushed by his.
"Sorry," he says and instantly relieves my hand of the pressure before he rounds on Parvati again.
Dean, however, stepped in before things could get ugly.
"Don't even think about it, Malfoy."
"Tell your idiot of a wife-"
"Draco!" I hiss, shaking my head vehemently, and cautious of the onlookers.
Parvati tsk'd, then her nose in the air, "Come Dean let's have dinner somewhere else. Away from this filth" and she turned back the way she just came.
Dean gave me a sympathetic look, "I'm sorry about that Hermione, I-"
"Don't," I whispered, unable to meet his gaze, "I deserved that." I turn right around and leave. The tears were tickling my eyes, and before I reached the Apparition Point, someone dragged me back.
Draco...
"Don't ever say you deserved that, because you don't." he said, but I didn't face him.
"Sure I do," I pull away from his grasp but Draco caught my hand once again. "I broke Ron's heart. I'm nothing but... but..."
My voice falters there, and all fight against his hands is lost. I collapse into his chest, hard, as my mind continues to torture me with those images of Ron. His broken expression, his anger... just everything about what happened with him numbs my entire being.
Ron...
My eyes close and I unknowingly release the hot liquid that pooled there.
Tears.
Burning hot tears, rake down my face like razor-sharp claws. Slowly and painfully, mimicking those grotesque torturing in the early Roman times. Where each cut progressively gets deeper and sharper.
Agony.
Godric, it's like I'm left broken and alone on the floor all over again.
So much for not thinking about him.
"Shh," Draco whispers, his arms enclosing around me like a vice. He combs his fingers through my hair and I find my legs wobbling from the sensation. "What happened wasn't done maliciously."
If you take into account that my love for him returned and I did nothing but rip it to shreds.
But I remain silent. I do not have the energy to divulge into this topic. Not again. In fact, having Draco just accept it is... so comforting in itself.
"Really, your... situation is really complicated to explain and understand. No one should point any fingers at you, nor should you just accept that they are right. The Hermione I knew, would not stand for such a thing."
Too busy on focusing on my breathing, I nearly missed what Draco said. But he's right. I shouldn't let what Parvati get to me. She, as Lavender said, is only sour because she can't have a baby...
But still I do work with the woman.
I don't have the strength to lift my head. It just feels so nice being up against him like this again.
"Right. You're absolutely right."
His fingers remain combing through my hair and I find my stomach fill with butterflies. Flipping and tugging. Such a wonderful feeling.
"Then stop this. Stop beating yourself up. It's not healthy."
Easier said than done. Ron had been a huge part of my life, fourteen years, this October to be exact. That's over half my life when you think about it. All those years through Hogwarts and after the War. Years Harry didn't want to throw off just because of my, um, lapse in judgement. Seamus' words, not mine.
But I'll try. For Draco and our, uh, budding relationship, I will try. I have to. He is the only good thing going on at the moment.
I take Draco's hand in mine, "Thank you," I pick up my head and give him a light peck on his lips, purely out of habit.
Shocked by my brief affection, I quickly step back and turn away from him.
"Oh. I shouldn't have done that!"
Licking my lips, I can still taste the wine he had at the meal against my tongue. My heart is pounding against my throat. But the tears... hadn't stopped.
I am viciously wiping away the wetness from my face.
"No need to feel ashamed" He murmurs. I feel his hands on my shoulders, and I find myself melting in his grasp. His breath is against my cheek, as his lips graze gently against my ear.
"Just let things be"
I can hear him inhaling against my hair. My eyes fall close. I swipe my lips for another taste of his kiss and hum softly.
"It's completely natural,"
Yes, it was natural. Like breathing. Much like how it feels to have him around me again.
But I cannot get Parvati's words out of my head.
"Flaunting it like she doesn't give a damn!"
"You and Ron have split for what, two weeks and already you're having it off with Malfoy?"
If only she knew those weeks had me a blubbering mess, and not as some shackled whore.
Draco's hand is on my hip and he swiftly turns me back around so we're facing each other. His eyes, they are like staring into my soul.
"I will find a way back to you. I promise"
Apart of me wonders if he's going to kiss me this time, and my heart pounds with anticipation. Kissing would be such a help to erasing these gutting emotions.
He raises his hand, and cups the side of my face, his thumb brushing away even more tears.
Gentle. It's just so gentle, and I find myself nuzzling into his hand. It feels so nice and warm against my wet cheek.
Will he kiss me? I'm not sure, but suddenly I feel very nervous. Scared even. Why, I'm not sure, we've done so already more than enough times...
"You have nothing to fear," he said, his hand never wavering. "We're not doing anything wrong. That little peck was just carefree and rather nice"
I smile at him, his words filling me up with such delight. Yes, it was nice to kiss him despite how brief it been. The taste already present on my tongue is teasing my senses to a maddening level of need.
A need of something much, much deeper and incredibly satisfying.
The words leave my mouth before I give them another chance to stop them.
"Take me,"
His eyes soften, but I felt his body stiffen up.
It's just like that day at the Manor in his bed. Memories that have me blushing to no end, thank Godric it's dark out here. He'd been so mad at himself for hurting me and landing me in the coma, coupled with all those emotions that wrecked havoc on my person, I needed a distraction. Something to make me feel alive.
Much like he did.
Yes, it would be safer to just not act on it. but Heaven knows I need this. I need him.
Draco closes his eyes and shakes his head, "No, it wouldn't be fair or right."
"Draco... please"
"No Hermione. It's not what you need."
His hand takes a hold of mine, "All you need is to go to your home, down some Calming Draught and sleep..."
I much rather sleep next to him, after throwing this overwhelming chaos in my head into a repeat of those blissful hours in his bed!
I nuzzled my head against his shoulder, "No. Not without you."
"Hermione, listen they made Calming Draughts for a reason... so one doesn't do something so... so extreme-"
"Wanting you isn't in any shape or form extreme." I snarl back at him, irritated by his rejection.
Curse his nobility.
"Trust me," he whispers, urging me to walk toward the Apparition Point. "It's the right choice."
No. He's wrong. Sleep won't heal me. Neither will some potion! I need... I need him. I need to feel wanted!
POP
Once we land back on the ground, my knees buckle and I fall on top of my ankles.
"Just go home," I mutter. I'm too ashamed at myself to even look at him. Rather I make no effort to even get up and instead curl myself in a ball. "Obviously you don't give two shits about my feelings, so leave!"
Not true, obviously. Rejection just stings. And I thought Ron's foul treatment of me was terrible.
He clicks his tongue and takes a hold of my arm, dragging me to my feet, "Congratulations Hermione, you've managed to perfect a splitting rendition of a five-year old in a snit!"
"Oh piss off!" My throat burns and my voice is unrecognizable. I managed to yank my arm from his grasp and stalk off down the street.
"Hate me all you want," he hollers, if only for a moment before he's at my side again. "But you know that... that... sex isn't the answer here!"
I cringe from the words. Must he say them like that? Cold and detached?
I shove him away when he gets to close to me, "I said go away! I don't want you around me anymore!"
Again, not true. He'd been the only sane thing I had!
"Can't, sorry. But I am not about to have you walk these streets alone."
"It's not even ten." I inform him sharply still refusing to look at him. "I have my wand so-"
"You're not in a state to defend yourself!"
This time I face him, "Well whose fault is that?!"
With a scoff, I stroll on. I hear him growl, and immediately pick up the pace. Away. I need to get away from him now. If he won't sleep with me then... then... I don't want to be around him at the moment. I'm too embarrassed.
Trying not to cry, I can see my apartment complex just a few blocks ahead, if only for a second before I'm twirled around, facing Draco again.
"Don't!" I hiss, recoiling from him. "Don't touch me!"
But Draco doesn't listen. He firmed his grip around my wrist and holds me steady. His steely gaze renders me paralyzed.
"Stop" was all he said to me. The slight chill in the air, has the hairs on my neck standing on end. "Hermione, just stop okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you again."
I'm shaking my head, not wanting to endure this conversation. My heart... can't take the abuse.
"It's just... you had it wrong. It's because of your emotions, that I care. Your well-being is and always has been my main concern since you woke up from that bloody coma! So yes I was in a bit of a state when you said I didn't care."
His hands shift to my shoulders and he steps in closer. He's right again. It been poor form on my part. Very poor form.
"Granted, sleeping with you is quite lovely, I would really like to build up to it this time, and not just jumping the gun as it were."
Well yes. I mean in those dreams we um, we hardly did much else.
I see him staring at me with a wicked grin, which can only mean one thing...
"I said that out loud, didn't I?" I mumble, the blush returning to my cheeks.
He nods once, "Yes. Yes you did."
"Bollocks," I step out of his grasp and turn my back on him. My fingers running through my dishevelled hair.
Clearly I'm in dire need of some sleep.
His hand is holding mine again, and I shyly turn back to him, "What?"
"Come on, let me take you home,"
Yes, that does sound so lovely. But something's missing.
I halt my steps, watching him sigh before he turns his head back to me. "Yes, love?"
I'm staring at our hands for a moment longer before I meet his gaze, "What was the other place you were going to take me?"
"Still wondering about that?"
"You know me. I'm always wondering about things."
He hums and then shoots me a sly smile, "Dancing."
"Dancing?"
He tugs my arm and does an impromptu twirl, before bringing me flush against him, like in those dance shows my Mum often watched.
"We never had that chance in well, during that time, did we?"
And it's here, I am suddenly reminded of that one evening. The night I confessed I loved him before we - before I woke up. My sad thoughts were quickly erased when Draco twirled me again. I'm glad he didn't ask why I was silent...
I can't believe we are here, out in the middle of the street dancing away to no music of any kind!
"Not bad, Granger." He says, pulling me back in and rubbing my back now. I half wished I wasn't wearing my coat so I could feel his fingers against my skin.
"Back to Granger is it?"
My tiredness from my whirl-wind of emotions, takes over and my head finds home to his shoulder once again.
"Love, you're always Granger to me."
I tighten my grip around his torso and sigh slowly. "I'm sorry for cutting our date so short. I always wanted to dance."
"We're dancing now"
My lips twitch and I have to lift my head to meet his gaze, "I mean how you planned for us to dance."
He rolls his shoulder, "No problem. Pansy owns the place so no need for reservations"
"Pansy?"
I stepped out of his grasp and frown.
Draco taps a finger to his chin, with a pondering look, "You know, she's a very good teacher, and quite easily the best physical work-" he broke off in a harsh male grunt.
GOOD! Serves him right for being such a prat!
I'm just sorry my heels weren't sharper.
With a sharp roll of my eyes, I stroll on.
Two blocks away now.
I cannot believe he would-no wait, of course he would!
Bloody bastard.
"Wait!" He hollers, but I pay him no attention.
One block away now.
I'm nearing the gate but before I can lay my hand on the latch, I'm pulled right back.
"Sorry," he says, sounding like he's trying really hard not to laugh, "it was just too good to pass up."
"Of course you would say that."
"Well yeah I mean I just love it when you get all jealous."
Ugh. Not this again.
"But truthfully speaking. Her family owns one of the best dance studios in the Wizarding World. If you desire lessons, the Parkinson's family joint is the place to go."
And I would've agreed if it weren't for the idea of him and Pansy doing the horizontal been planted in my head! The very same I wanted just a few short conversations ago.
"Friends," he said with a smile, after a long bout of silence.
I turn back to face him, not fully comprehending what he meant by that statement.
"What?"
He clears his throat, "Pansy and I, are just friends. Very good friends, nothing else" he proceeds to open the gate of the complex and motions me through, "After you my lady."
Yes it's official. Draco Malfoy certainly triggers a whirlwind of emotions through me. It's hard to think I started off the evening put off and depressed.
Five days later...
I'm busy doing the May Inventory Report, when the chime rings alerting me someone has entered the shop.
"Be with you in a minute."
Lavender is away on lunch and Parvati... as annoyed as she is with me, she won't let our business suffer. Thank Godric for that! So she's in until later. When my shift is over.
After completing the final line of potions, I make way to greet my customer.
It's Harry.
And he looks like complete hell. Dishevelled, hair. Hollowed cheeks and sunken eyes. Almost like death.
Something tugs inside me, but I'm not sure what. It's nowhere near my heart but it feels just the same. Sharp.
Death?
Has someone died? Oh... oh God... I don't think I can handle-
"What is it?" I say, inching my way over to him. Fearing the worst. Who could it be? Nothing's been reported in the Prophet, I can thank Lavender for that. She's always the one I can count on for those reports.
Harry takes a deep breath, "I'm sorry Hermione. Sorry that I... I hadn't talked to you in ages, like I said I would."
Why he suddenly feels guilty when obviously he's troubled is beyond me...
"Harry it's fine. Really, Harry don't feel-"
"It's just... it's Ginny."
Ginny?
What could have happened to her?
"She... she been in a Quidditch accident..." he sniffs, his voice barely audible.
My body becomes riddled with goose-bumps. No, please Lord. Not Ginny.
"Took a Bludger to the head, so..."
I reach over and wrap my arms around Harry's neck.
"She's... she lost her memory, Hermione." His voice is small.
His grip tightens around my waist, holding me close. "She doesn't know who I am or that she's pregnant."
E/N: I sure do like my zinger's don't I?
Anyway, I don't believe Hermione would be out of character for this chapter.. emotions ran high for our girl and well, being rejected by the one person she thought would accept her, kinda stung. Especially when she knows he loves her!
Draco is a joker, so apologies if that Pansy part was odd. Humor folks, that's all it was for ;)