Wow, thank you for the great response last chapter! Your reviews really mean a lot to me. Special shoutout to Sgdp1261 and insertnameherex - it was great to see you guys over in 'A is for Arlene'. So here's the next chapter, and don't forget to let me know what you think. :)

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December 20th

He didn't look ashamed. He didn't look remorseful. He looked startled at being interrupted, but that was it. And that made Spencer furious. The emotional side of her brain gave the logical part permission to take a long sabbatical, and she charged at him, clawing at him, letting out a strangled wail as she tried to inflict as much pain on him as possible.

She got in a few good shots, but he reacted quickly. Her outrage gave her strength, but it also made her clumsy. He grabbed her shoulders and shoved her against the wall, knocking the breath out of her and making her double over in pain. By the time she recovered enough to open her eyes, he was already gone. For the briefest instant she considered going after him, but she was needed here.

"Hey," she said softly, dropping to her knees beside Aria.

The smaller girl blinked at her through her tears, a trickle of blood running down her face. It broke Spencer's heart to see her like this, to feel so powerless. And to know that she may have been the reason for it. If only she hadn't let her leave, maybe this wouldn't have happened.

"You're going to be okay," Spencer promised, and she tried her best to make that true.

But as horrible as that day was, what followed was even worse. Spencer called 911 and waited with Aria until the ambulance came. She gave her statement to the police, rode with Aria in the ambulance, stayed with her until the nurses told her to go home. She made sure to visit Aria every day after that, even though she went back to Rosewood, which was a forty minute drive away.

Spencer did everything she could to help Aria through it. She became a shoulder to cry on, a friend to talk to, anything that Aria needed her to be. She went grocery shopping for her, picked up assignments, and grabbed a few things from Aria's room that she couldn't bear to live without. She kept a sympathetic smile on her face the whole time, but it killed her to see her girlfriend change before her eyes.

She tried not to notice the way Aria flinched when she touched her. When Aria asked her to leave so she could get some rest, she tried to remind herself that Aria had been through an ordeal and needed time alone. And the day that Aria woke up screaming, and Spencer had tried to calm her down, but Aria had been so frantic that in her confusion she'd slapped her across the face – well, Spencer took it in her stride. Aria needed her, and she was going to be there for her.

She was never quite sure whether to talk about it or not. People started referring to it as 'that night' or 'the incident', and when the police had done a follow-up interview and used the word rape around Aria, Spencer couldn't help but notice that Aria averted her eyes and mumbled something incoherent.

Of course, Spencer still loved Aria. She couldn't imagine life, or even a day, without her. She wanted to be with her, but more than that, she wanted to mean something to her. Aria was… there was no other word besides broken. When she looked at Spencer, her eyes were dull and lifeless, not even a flicker of love or light. Spencer's girl was slipping away from her, and she blamed herself.

If only she hadn't initiated that fight. If only she'd gone after her sooner. If only she'd been stronger and smarter and better, she could have stopped this. And she wouldn't have to sit there and watch Aria look at her with those dead eyes, hear Aria answer every question in a monosyllabic monotone, feel her slipping further and further away.

Days melded into weeks, and there was no change. Spencer knew she was going to have to accept the fact that it was over, that she'd never get her girl back, but something kept her hanging on. Some faint stirring of delusional hope, something the emotional part of her clung to while logic was still on vacation. She wasn't entirely sure what she was doing, but she knew why.

People always do crazy things when they're in love, after all.

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