Chapter 4

I found a nice country inn out in the country. I checked in and hid for the night. I found myself crying for the third time that day. It killed me. Leaving like that, but I had too. Deanna was smart enough to connect the dots after a while. If she found new cuts after being with Fred, after everything that has happened, she would ask questions, and she wouldn't have taken me falling as an answer. She would have gotten herself in such deep crap that she would get herself where I am. Scared shitless. I hoped to God that she didn't start blaming Fred. The last thing I wanted was to have Fred turn on her.

I didn't sleep much that night. Just enough to keep me going the next. I ate at the inn and left. I called Deanna on a pay phone.

"Hey Deanna."

"OH MY GOD! Jill, is that you?" she sounded worried. Not scarred. I praised God for a second.

"Yeah. It's me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving. But I had to. You wouldn't understand. Just trust me its for the best."

"If you're sorry, come back. Everyone is worried. Even Sam. Dean got Cas and Sam after you as well as the three of us. Please, Come back."

"I cant. I'm sorry. Can you put Dean on the phone?"

"I guess." She was so sad. It broke my heart. But I was doing this for her. I started to cry.

"Jill? Jill? You there?" Dean's voice was enough to calm me down a little.

"Hey, Dean. I'm sorry for leaving like that. I had to. If I didn't…"

Dean cut me off, "What did Fred do to you? He is what you're terrified of. Never in my life have I've seen such horror on a face. What did that Bastard do to you?"

"It's complicated. Just know I'm ok. And that I stay away, no one gets hurt." I started to cry again "Please tell Deanna happy birthday from me will you?"

"Of course." His voice cracked, like he was sad as well. I could hear Deanna crying the background.

"I'm sorry. Goodbye Dean." Then I hung up real quick before I cry more. When I finally stopped, I started to walk again. I knew of a bus stop up head. I headed for it.

It was starting to get a little late when I heard an engine behind me. A loud one. I hoped to God it wasn't Dean's impala, but it was.

He pulled over, but I kept walking. I heard the open and the close of the driver side of the car and Dean yelling for me to stop. I kept going. Sadly, I was so tired that I couldn't run. But I went as far as I could. He ran up behind me and turned me around.

"What did Fred do to you?" Dean was so gentle but stern at the same time. I broke. I just broke. I fell down and I couldn't control myself. Dean came down with me, catching me. He just held me. Comforting me like he did the day before. When I had some control back in me, I tried to get free, but he wouldn't let me. He just held me there. Still comforting me. He started rocking me like I was a little kid.

When I had calmed down. He asked me again. "What did Fred do? What did that bastard do to you?"

I had been wearing my sports bra that day, so I showed him. I took off my t-shirt. The first time I ever took off my shirt in front of someone for them to see the scars that covered up scars. The scars that covered my back like a blanket. The scars I was always afraid to show.

Dean looked at of them. The ones that weren't covered by my bra. As he looked at them, I told him. Everything. Scared what would happen next.

"I was afraid that if he started up again, Deanna would connect the dots. I was afraid of her asking too many questions and he would go after her as well. This was the only solution I thought would be the less painful." I started crying again. "I'm sorry Dean. I thought I was the right thing. I'm sorry."

"Shut up. You have nothing to be sorry about. Do you want to put your shirt back on?"

"Yes please." He handed me my shirt back and I slipped it back on. But we didn't get up after. He held me for a bit longer. He kept whispering something. I couldn't make out what. I didnt understand why the hell he was taking it so hard.

He finally spoke again. "I'm going to make that sorry son of a bitch pay."

"Dean. Please. No. He'll…"

Dean cut me off, "He will do nothing to anyone. I'm going to kill him before he has the chance."

"Please. Don't. Don't stoop to his level. Please."

"It's my fault."

"What is?"

"You getting hurt like this. You being so afraid of this guy. It's all my fault."

"How is your fault?"

He didn't say. Hey just kept holding me there. We just sat there for a few minutes. Waiting for the other to say something.

Dean was the one who broke the silence. "Hey, don't you have a party to get to?"

"Do I have to?"

"Yes. You promised your sister. Now if we start heading out, we will be at the hotel in a couple of hours, which leaves you two hours to get ready."

"Fine." We got up and started walking to the Impala. He grabbed my bag for me and put it in the back. I sat shotgun with him. He turned on some music and I reached in my bag to get a book from it and started reading. I always keep a book in every bag for that reason.

It was a couple of hours before we finally got to the hotel.

"We're here. Your sister is already with Fred doing the setting up of the decorations."

"OK. Deanna gave me make-up this morning. It's in my book bag." I can hear Dean chuckling to himself. "Yes, she won that argument. Shut up." Dean started laughing more. "Lets just get this night over with." We started getting out of the car. Dean was already to the room door when I yell "Wait. Can you unlock the door? I need something from my bag."

"Yeah." He came over and unlocked the door. He watched me to make sure I wasn't running again.

"Wow. So trustworthy." I laughed as I grabbed a small, wrapped box from my bag. He laughed a little too. I got out and closed the door.

"What's that?"

"Deanna's Birthday gift."

"Can I see?"

"Dude. I already wrapped it." We both laughed a little and we went into the hotel room. I took a real quick shower and got ready. Took me a little less than an hour altogether. While I was getting ready, Dean called Sam and Cas to stop looking.

When I was done, Dean was trying figure out what I got Deanna. "It's a locket that belong to our mother. I took it to a jeweler to get it all cleaned up and fixed."

"That is really nice."

"Thanks."

"I'm ready."

I came out in a black dress with a yellow and red plaid skirt. My shoes were black heals and I had a black purse to with the outfit. I curled my hair and pinned it to the side. My make-up looked natural except the gold eye shadow and the red lipstick I was wearing. I had a gold necklace and a gold bracelet that Deanna let me borrow.

"You look beautiful, Jill."

"Thanks Dean. Lets just get this night over with."

"Happy birthday."

"Thanks." And with that, we left. I snuck in to try to find Deanna. I didn't want my arrival announced. It took me a few minutes before I found her.

"Hey Deanna."

"Jill?" she said has she turned around to face me.

"Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She hugged me to tight. So tight I could barley breath.

"I'm so glad you're back. I was so worried. Why the Hell did you leave." She let go of me so she could look at my face.

"It's complicated. I'm so sorry I hurt you. I thought I could keep you safe."

"Stop trying to protect me. You're only a few minutes older."

"It's a habit. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

"Just don't do that again."

"I'll try." She hugged me again and showed me where everything was. We talked with people she knew. It wasn't so bad. We had cake and danced. It was fun. When the party was over, we had to help clean up. It didn't take to long. Fred didn't talk to me for the rest of the night. I didn't know to be relieved or more scared. We both rode with Dean. Fred took the gifts. I got mostly money, Deanna got money, jewelry, make-up, clothes, and you know, extremely girly things.

"Hey. I never gave you my gift."

"You got me something?"

"Yeah. Here," I pulled it out of my purse and gave it to her. She opened it and was surprised.

"Is this?"

"Yeah. I had it fixed up for you. Cleaned mostly. Open it."

"It's Mom."

"Yeah. I thought you would want it."

"It's perfect. Thank you." She hugged me and put it on. I smiled sadly. No one said anything after. I pulled put my book and read, and Deanna just studied the locket.

We where back at the hotel in no time. Fred was right behind us. We all meet at the door, when Fred turned to me.

"Can I talk to you in private?" I could tell Dean was getting prepared for the worse.