Emma

I'd had trouble sleeping ever since returning from the Scanren border. It had been a little easier when I was sleeping back in the old room I had shared Maira, but many of the Shang masters had decided to take their trainees up into the Gallan mountains for the winter. Since Randall had thought that I, like the young children, needed to toughen up, we had also gone along.

Randall was probably right, since I had half considered hightailing it to the Southern Desert after I'd been drilling barefoot in the snow for only a few hours. I did need to toughen up, and so I became quite acquainted with discomfort while the younger children and their trainers learned about winter survival and why not to walk around barefoot.

So even though I was exhausted, I couldn't seem to fall asleep. I tried to tell myself it was because I was cold, or the ground was too crunchy, but I know that I couldn't sleep because Maira was out and most likely not with her young trainees.

When she finally did come into our small tent, I pretended I was asleep.

"Em," Maira whispered, breathless and excited.

I didn't answer, of course, because I was asleep.

"Emma," She shook my shoulder gently. "Please wake up."

"Hmmm," I rolled over, rubbing my eyes.

"Oh, stop," Maira laughed. "You've never woken up like that."

I scowled in the dark and sat up. "What then?"

"Have you ever bedded a man?"

"Yes," I thought I knew what she meant.

"Really?"

Years ago, Randall had decided that I needed to have a talk. He had gotten the Shang Wildcat to explain monthlies and baby-making to me. I think Randall would have done a better job, honestly. I was still trying to work out the details of the confusing mess the Shang Wildcat had described and I had a sneaking suspicion that she left some of the really important parts out.

But I did gather that mature individuals could choose to bed with men, which was what Maira was asking about. I hadn't ever done that, but if she was asking about it, she'd probably tried it.

"Of course I have," I shrugged. "You haven't?"

Maira wrapped her arms around her knees. "Glenn and I are lovers now. I don't think I've ever been happier."

"Oh," I laid back down and closed my eyes. "That's nice, I guess."

Maira nodded. "I really like him, Em. He's sweet and kind and strong-"

I snorted. "Strong? His left fly sidekick is wobbly."

"His left fly..." Maira's voice trailed off. "What?"

"And his tumbles are clumsy," I added.

"Can't you just be happy for me?" Maira asked, sounding hurt.

Well, I was hurt too. "No. There's nothing to be happy for."

"Yes, there is!" She sounded angry. "You should be happy that I'm happy."

"Be happy that you're happy?"

"Because we're friends!" Maira opened her bedroll with swift, jerky motions.

Now she was just being ridiculous. "I don't have to be happy that you laid out for Glenn."

"Laid out?" Maira was shocked. "What's wrong with you?

"What? Nothing."

"Why don't you just tell me, instead of being a monster about everything?" Maira snapped, eyes flashing. She laid down on the bed, her curls splayed across the pillow.

I tried to search for the right words to say, but nothing came out. I couldn't help it, I reached out and softly brushed a strand of hair off her cheek.

Maira grabbed my wrist in a motion almost too fast for me to anticipate. I couldn't read what was in her eyes, but I was pretty certain she was furious at me.

My heart pounding, I twisted out of her strong fingers. I slipped out of my bedroll, shoving my feet into my fur-lined boots.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to sleep outside," I fastened my coat.

"Don't be stupid," She warned me, grabbing my blankets.

"Give me that!" I demanded, holding out my arms.

"Fine!" She wadded them into a ball and hurled them at my chest.

I took them and went, tying the tent door closed behind me.

Jedda

I tried to pull away from the knight but her grip on me was iron tight. Iron tight, like the solidness of the shackles that would be about my poor little ankles for all time if I didn't do something.

"I care for myself." I scowled up at the knight. "And I didn't do nothing wrong."

She raised an eyebrow. I had to crane my neck to look up at her. "You did nothing wrong?"

"No, milady, I sure didn't."

"Jedda, things go better if you're honest."

I sighed because she still remembered my name from the last time I was in trouble. "I sure don't believe that tripe."

She raised her eyebrows at me, then her face turned into the scary stone mask. "Who did that to your face?"

I wasn't falling for that cursed trick. "What's wrong with my face?"

"Jedda," She guided me by my shoulder. "You'll need to see a healer for that."

"I wonder what people done before healers," I muttered.

The corners of her mouth turned up.

I scuffed my bare feet in the dirt as we walked.

Erlie ran up beside me. "Lady Knight, can Jedda come play?"

The knight smiled knowingly at Erlie.

Erlie shrugged at me and ran off.

I frowned. That trick with Erlie worked once before with the hostler, but I guessed the lady knight was a mite smarter than a stablehand.

"Tobe!" She stopped her servant boy. "See her to the healers?"

"Mm-hmm, milady," He brushed the shaggy hair out of his eyes. "The scribes say they've got papers for you to look over."

"Alright," The lady knight nodded. "Thank you, Tobe."

"Yep," He answered casually.

I tried to wriggle away from his hand as soon as the knight was out of sight, but he was stronger than he looked. "Stop fidgeting, will you? You know, there's training you can get, so nobody can beat on you.

"Nobody?" I snorted. "That a sure promise?"

"Better than doing nothing," Tobe pointed out.

I made faces at his back as we walked through the healer's door.