Kelly sat on the sofa waiting for Kevin to return to the room. It had been a nice visit. Zane was doing well in school, so well in fact that he'd been chosen to attend a summer program in Venice. He'd known about it for a few weeks, but he'd chosen that night to tell them. He wanted to wait until he could tell them together.

They were both so happy and proud that they couldn't turn down his request to go celebrate with friends even if it did mean they wouldn't be having dinner together.

The sound of footsteps shook her from her thoughts.

"There's an awful lot of food in there," Kevin smiled, gesturing back towards the kitchen

"We'll just do it tomorrow night," Kelly smiled, standing and walking towards the coat closet.

"Come on, Kel. Neville has already cooked and you know how he hates wasted food. Besides it will give us a chance to talk. It's been forever since we've had any time alone."

Kelly sighed, feeling the familiar tension return to her body. That, she thought silently, was no accident. She loved coming to London and visiting Zane, but every time she saw Kevin there was a pull there, a pull she constantly fought because she knew it only led to disaster.

"He can save it til tomorrow. It'll be fine," she protested.

"Leftovers, Kel? You know better than that." He reached out, his hand grabbing hers before the thought better of it. She jerked back immediately.

"I'm sorry," she stammered, catching the hurt look in his eye. "I didn't mean...I mean...you just...you startled me...that's all."

Kevin stepped back, turning away from her. "You can say it. You can say that you don't want to be here with me. It's obvious every time you walk in the door-the way you rush over to Zane like you're desperate for a distraction, the way you talk to Neville like he's your newest best friend, the way you'll go to bed while it's still light out if it means you can avoid spending any time alone with me."

Her expression softened. He didn't understand and she couldn't expect him to. "I don't mean it like that," she whispered, moving around in front of him. "It's just that I know how...I know how we..."

"You know how I am," he said. "You know how I was...you know what an ass I was, what an idiot I was, the mistakes I made. I get it, ok?"

"Kev," she started, reaching out her hand, desperate to soothe the pain she'd caused.

"You can go now," he whispered, turning away from her again.

The hurt and fear and resentment gave way to anger and before she knew it she grabbed his shoulder and whirled him around to face her.

"Dammit, Kevin Buchanan, don't you get it?! You're right, I do come here and throw myself into Zane's life because I'm trying to distract myself and I talk to Neville to keep myself away from you and yes, I would go to bed in the middle of the afternoon if it meant I wouldn't spend time alone with you but you're dead wrong about why!"

The sudden change in her emotions had taken him completely off guard. He stood in stunned silence as she continued her tirade.

"It's not because I don't want to be with you, it's because I want to so much that it scares me. It's because I'm afraid if I give myself even one inch with you that we'll go right back down that road and we'll end up hurting each other again and I don't want to see that happen to you or to me and especially to Zane."

"Kel," he said softly, reaching out to her and taking her hand in his. "I..."

She pulled away again. "We don't work, Kev. We just don't. I love you and I know you love me, but that's not enough...not for this...not for us. We're toxic. We hurt each other and I care too much."

He took a breath, swallowing hard. The hardest part was hearing the truth-a truth even he couldn't refute. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

Reaching up she covered his hand with hers. "If I didn't know better," she whispered, "I wouldn't even hesitate." Bringing his hand to her lips, she kissed it gently, grabbed her jacket and walked out the door.