"Courage is being scared to death... and saddling up anyway."

John Wayne

Kung Fu Panda

The Long Night

Chapter VII: Benkei

"Uhhh….." I moan.

While my eyes open slowly, the darkness in front of me vanishes. I begin to see details. A wooden roof…? I feel like I am moved.

I try to move my head….Ahhhh! Headache…I grab my head….it begins to subside….

Where am I? What happened anyway? …Slowly the memories come back.

This bear! Ow….again headache….It subsides again.

I force myself into a sitting position. I look around. I know this place.

It is my dark cabin on Sijna's ship. And guessing from the movements of it, we seem to be on sea.

How long have I been sleeping?

I want to leave my hammock – in this room is also a hammock for Aijna – while my headache begins again. I touch my head again and realize I have a bandage there. And by looking down I realize that I have a bandage around my chest as well.

I touch it and it hurts. The point where this bear has hit me…..I shake my head while remembering this….Ow….note to myself: Don't move your head too much.

I jump down from the hammock and realize how cold the wooden ground feels…..I am nude!

I look around, while hiding the important place, although I know no one is here.

I find my clothes on a chair. I almost run there despite the pain in my head.

While grabbing my vest, I hear a crackling noise behind me. I turn around and see Aijna in the door.

"You seem to be awake finally…..would have not thought to see you like this once." she says with a gleeful grin. I realize what she means and hide it with my vest.

Man….that is embarrassing…but at least it is Aijna.

"So dress up, little Princess and come up. We have something to discuss." She says while turning around.

"Hey, I am not a little pr…!" I want to respond, but she is gone already. Crap!

I dress up fast – also my glasses – and leave my cabin. The corridor outside on the deck is short, but the light of the sun is shining stronger than I have expected. I need to block my vision with my hand till my eyes refocus to daylight.

I see the Crew of Sijna wandering around the deck doing some duties, which are needed on this ship. I go to the railing and realize that my guess from being on the Sea was absolutely right. At least the headaches don't prevent me from thinking correctly. But now the question how long I was sleeping is getting more interesting once again.

"Hey, come up sleepy Princess. We are here." I hear Sijna's voice from the right. The almost identical sister of Aijna – she has purple hair – is on the deck above the cabins, where also the Wheel can be found. I go up the stairs while replying: "I am not a Princess!"

Beside Sijna I see Aijna with the staff, Pantu as well like an unexpected guest: the bear.

"What the hell is he doing here?!" I ask immediately.

"Oh you want to throw me over board…? I knew it!" the bear yells and seems almost close to crying.

"No, Benkei. No one wants to throw you over board." Aijna replies soothing. Then she glares at me.

I scratch the back of my head. "Can someone explain me….WHAT IS GOING ON!?"

The bear called Benkei winces cause of my yell. I think he begins to cry, but instead he is reciting the Mantra I heard already: "Don't be afraid. Fear is an illusion, which…."

"Please Stop, Benkei!" Sijna intervenes immediately. She glares at me: "Cien apologize to him and say you don't want to throw him over board!"

I still have no clue what is going on, but the unified attack of glaring of Sijna and Aijna as well that the Mantra begins to sound frightening is enough, that I bow my head: "I am sorry,…Benkei. And I don't want to throw you over board. I promise!"

First nothing happens, but then the voice becomes normal once again. And when the bear has ended reciting, he begins to look at me with sorrowful eyes….oh god….

Suddenly he falls on his knees and bows his head in front of me: "I am sorry! Really sorry! For knocking you out, while being on Berserk. Please accept my apologize!"

I look at him dumbfounded. I look at Aijna and Sijna, who nod to me. Pantu in the background is close to laugh, although I don't have a clue why he is not doing it.

Awkward I tap on the bears head. "I accept your apologize." I say a little unsure. Immediately the bear comes on his feet with a joyful smile.

"Thank the Goddess! You are accepting it!" he says before he takes me into a hug.

A monstrous hug. I feel like the pain is coming back into my head, but much more intensive. And I begin…..to react….on missing….air…..AIR!

"Benkei let him go! You smash him otherwise!" Aijna intervenes in time. After the bear lets me go, I fall on my ass. I begin to pant loudly. This guy had killed me almost!

"Oh, I am sorry. Really!" the bear tries to apologize again.

"It is okay. No hard feelings! But….please….don't hug me anymore." I mutter to him, while standing up again and simultaneously going one or two steps away from him.

"So…can you explain the one or another thing to me.", I say, turning my head to Aijna. I realize that my arm is still in a protective manner directed at the bear.

"Yes, of course. This is Benkei…." Aijna wants to begin, but I interrupt her: "Wait a minute….can you say me first, how long I was sleeping?"

"Two days." Sijna replies directly.

WHAT!

"Two days?! That is impossible! How could he sent me to sleep for so long?!" I say loud.

"I know, I am sorry….I am sorry." the bear begins to say once again. "Oh don't worry." I say with an acted smile, "I was only surprised how weak I am."

"Where is the surprise?" Aijna replies smirking.

"That was a low blow!" I reply a little angry, but still maintain my acted grin as long as this bear looks like he would cry every moment.

"So where was I, before you have interrupted me so rude?" Aijna continues her explanation, "This is Benkei, a Japanese Monk."

"A Monk?" I look at him properly, "He doesn't look like one."

"I know." Benkei replies, "I was banned."

"Banned?" I wonder, "Have you broken some rules?"

"Not exactly." Aijna intervenes, "His Order is an Order of Warrior Monks."

"Warrior Monks? Something like this Shaolin I have heard about?"

"Something similar." Aijna approves.

"The reason for my ban is that I am coward." Benkei explains, "As a Warrior Monk you need to be always strong, in body like in resolve. You are not allowed to hesitate even for a moment, because this could mean the death of many innocent people. But I am whiny, easy afraid, undisciplined and someone who flies after the first signs of danger."

To the first three I can't object, but the last one….

"But you have beaten up all the thugs in the tavern?" I object.

"Yeah this is because of my Berserk Mode."

"Berserk Mode?"

"Yeah, that what we wanted to prevent few moments ago." Aijna explains.

"But he has only recited some…Mantra."

"Not any Mantra. The Mantra of Son Goku." and he adds after he sees my questioning look, "The Japanese name of Sun Wukong."

"Sun Wukong?"

"Yeah. The hero Son Goku….Sun Wukong has left many Mantras behind after his death. Some to strengthen the resolve of the ones, who read it. This Mantra is about the fear. After I was banned, I searched for it and found it. Always when I am reciting it, the fear vanishes and is replaced by courage and strength."

"A nice thing you have there….and why have you attacked me?"

He gulps and doesn't dare to look into my eyes. He is really a coward. "When I am in this Mode, I am…not able to control myself. I am attacking everyone and everything, which I see as danger. I thought I would be able to control it, when I am training it, but….it has not become better. But still I wanted to use it for the right thing…to fight injustice wherever you meet it. Like I was taught. It was the first time I used it against innocent people and I feel ashamed cause of this."

"Hope you don't start thinking about Suicide once again?" Sijna asks him. Suicide?

"No you made your point clear.", Benkei replies weakly. Something happened while I was unconscious,...hmm…whatever. Instead I ask Aijna: "And how comes you seem uninjured?"

"I dodged his attacks." she replies, "And then I…", "She hit me with this staff at my head." Benkei replies instead of her. I look at the staff immediately. It is leaned not far away against the railing.

"So a direct hit at your head deactivates this Mode?" I ask to get sure.

"Usually not. But maybe it has something to do with the fact that this staff belongs to Son…Sun Wukong.", his eyes are looking joyfully, "Because the Mantra….and the staff…."

"…belong to Sun Wukong. I get it.", I finish the sentence.

Hmm…..somehow now I have more questions than earlier. I look at Pantu who has listened to us quietly till now. He doesn't look like a prisoner.

"And you….you have told us where we need to search already?" I ask him trying to get my cool self back again.

"He has. We are on our way." Sijna replies.

"Where to?"

"The old HQ." Pantu replies.

"We have been there already. It is empty."

"Only because it looks empty doesn't mean it is.", he replies enigmatically.

"What the hell are you saying? We were there and we searched it through. In this castle was nothing to find."

"Wrong. Aijna told me you have found a destroyed map on the ground."

"It was useless. Too destroyed to picture it enough."

"These maps are found in every Outpost of the Order. Usually they show the way to the HQ. The map in the HQ shows the way to all Outposts as well like Secret HQs. As long as you know for what you need to look at. No matter if it is destroyed or not, there can still be find clues about where the Order fled."

Somehow I can hear a sense in there. Crap!

"I get it. So in other way: We made this long journey for getting a decipherer instead of an Insider. You have no clue where these Secrets HQs are right now?"

"Nope. I had a higher rank in the Order, but only the Master knows all the Secrets."

"But still you know how to read these maps?"

"That was not a Secret although I have only read the ones in the Outposts."

"I see…we have no choice than trusting you what?"

"No choice at all, yes. And there for you protect me of the Order."

"That was the deal before you tried to escape. If it is still intact, I don't know." I reply with a grin.

"You…traitor!" he says angrily.

"Don't provoke me. For now we need you. So stay useful and I reconsider this matter maybe." I reply while leaving the wheel area of the ship. I hear the loud steps of a bear.

"Cien-san, I want to talk with you." Benkei speaks to me.

"What is the matter? I hope we don't need to apologize to each other again."

"No, it has something to do with this. Aijna-sama has explained me the situation and I want to help."

"You want to help? Why?"

"Because this is injustice against you fight here. Every injustice must be eliminated, that is the highest principle of my Order."

"But you were banned….?"

"That doesn't mean that I don't believe in this. I was banned for my cowardice and not for my disbelief."

I look at him precisely…..something is odd…above all how he says all this…I have an idea.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course!"

Too loud. "How is it possible, that you were banned for cowardice anyway? I thought normally you can be taught to overcome your fear in such….institutions."

Immediately he begins to avoid my eyes. He replies with a stammering voice: "No….not in my…institution. Cowardice is not tolerated there…and courage can't be taught."

I look at him more precisely. He seems to be nervous not afraid…..Hmm….what have I learned once: the best liar mixes the lie with the truth….he obviously hides something…Hmmm….have not thought that this guy could be a good liar….I chuckle…this could be interesting…

"You can stay." I reply finally. He can be useful with his strength, but….

"But you will not use the Berserk Mode without my allowance. Is this clear?"

"Of course…" he replies still with a happy face.

I turn my back to him and go to the bow. Somehow I feel uneasy.

Then I see it: A storm at the horizon is taking shape. Bad Omen.

Been a while since the last publishing :) I hope there are still readers outside to be found. ;)
No action here like you see, but I hope still that you like it. I appreciate it still when you would review this chapter.

A thing I need to mention: Because of different time shedules I have now, the publishing rate could end quite irregular from now on. I am sorry for this, but I don't see a way to change it for now.

"Kung Fu Panda" (c) DreamWorks Animation

I own nothing except for the written word.
Characters you don't know are from me. The Idea is also from me.