"Stop laughing, Howler," Penryn grumbled.
"Laughing?" he said, clutching his chest over a mock wound. "I would never laugh at you, Penryn."
"You are definitely snickering. Giggling even."
"You must be hearing things. Maybe it was an owl, or a twig crunching. You humans have such bad hearing, I doubt you could tell the difference."
"It's amazing you angels can even bother to listen to anything, being so in love with your own voices and all," said Penryn. Despite the retort, she accepted Howler's help going over a fallen tree that had blocked the forest trail.
"There's the Maggot Slayer I know," Howler said. "So sweet of tongue and gentle of heart. I thought she had been swallowed by a wool monster."
Penryn wrinkled her nose at him and tugged her coat tighter around her body.
"Maybe you can frolic in subzero temperatures, birdboy, but I can't," she said. "Besides, you were the one who dragged me out to the forest in the freezing cold for some stupid surprise."
"Come on, it's not that bad."
"It's snowing," she complained. "It never snows in San Francisco."
"Well, we'd get to warmth a lot sooner if you stop waddling so slow."
"I'm not waddling!"
This time Howler couldn't hide his snicker. "You look like a penguin."
To that, Penryn might have to concede. Between the stiff, heavy jacket, her thick scarf, and the long johns under her regular clothes-all either black or white-she looked much rounder and fluffier.
She dusted some snow off her head. She tried beating off the cold by slipping a bobble hat over her beanie, but no such luck.
Whatever "surprise" Howler had in mind, she doubted it was worth tramping through the open space forest reserve after dark to get there. He had bullied and cajoled and annoyed her after dinner until she finally relented and came with him. It had practically been kidnapping because the only other escape would have strangling him to shut him up.
"How much longer until we get to wherever we're going?"
"Probably five more minutes."
"That's what you said five minutes ago."
"Well, we'd get there a lot faster if you'd just let me fly us there."
Penryn scoffed. "Not a chance."
"Oh come on, you're still not over what happened last month?"
"You dropped me!"
"I also caught you after five seconds. You never remember that part. It was just a little joke."
"We were a hundred feet up in the air. Hilarious."
"Don't be ridiculous," said Howler. "We were much higher up."
"Finally." Penryn took off both her hats and shook the snow out as she surveyed the room. "Hi, everyone."
The Watchers answered with a chorus of hello's. Half dozen or so of the soldiers were sprawled all throughout the one-room cabin. In the center was a table crowded with half-full bottles of vodka, whiskey, and tequila along with a couple pitchers of an unmarked substance.
Penryn raised an eyebrow at the set-up. "Having a party, boys?"
Several of the Watchers cheered and raised their glasses.
"No, absolutely not," Howler said, ignoring the boos thrown his way. "Although I see that you've already broken into the goods."
"You were taking forever," Hawk complained.
"We just thought it would be prudent to get a head start," Thermo said. He burped. "Excuse me. It takes a lot more time for us to become intoxicated than humans."
"Yeah, this human's not interested in getting intoxicated," Penryn said. "So if that's all-"
"As I was saying," Howler said loudly, cutting her off. "This is no party. This is a very serious occasion. For too long, we have let this fallen by the wayside, but now we must take care of the matter. All rise."
The Watchers dragged themselves upright and standing. Howler placed his hands on Penryn's shoulders and looked into her eyes gravely. He looked so serious that it actually had her worried.
"Penryn Young. Daughter of Man. Killer of Angels. You have fought beside us in the depths of hell and in the battlefield. In the face of certain death, you have walked into battle with sword in hand and head held high. With us and for us, you have shed blood and you have conquered. By all rights, you have earned your place amongst us a true warrior. You have joined our brotherhood and now we will toast in your honor and be merry."
Penryn's throat tightened. For a moment, she couldn't say anything even if she had tried.
Then she remembered the group she was dealing with and narrowed her eyes.
"You dragged me out in the snow so we could all get drunk together in a deserted log cabin?"
"More or less, yes."
She stared at them all for a beat.
"Okay, I'm leaving." She shoved her hats back on and turned to the door. "Also, I hate all of you. But mostly Howler."
"Oh, no, you don't." Howler and Cyclone grabbed each of her arms and frog-marched her to a seat in front of the table. They were tall enough to lift her feet completely off the ground and annoyingly tough enough to deal with her useless kicks.
"It's been months since Half Moon Bay," said Penryn said as she was shoved down to sit by the shoulders. "Funny you had to wait until the night that DeeDum wanted to hold their fireworks show to set this. Which I had explicitly said no to."
"Technically, you never said no," Thermo said. "You just laughed and told them 'in their dreams.'"
"We're just killing two birds with one stone," said Howler. "Those twins bribe generously and we get to conduct this rite of passage for you."
"Plus, Boss said that you'd never gotten drunk before," said Cyclone. "Which is absolutely unacceptable."
"And you've been so stressed out with your duties," said Thermo. "We thought we could help you unwind."
"Before you snap and murder someone," Hawk interjected.
"See? We're killing an entire flock with one stone." Howler poured vodka into a shot glass and held it out to her.
"No, I'm pretty sure I'm the one thinking about killing a flock right now," Penryn said.
She contemplated the glass in Howler's hand. Even if she left right now, it probably would be too late to keep DeeDum from potentially blowing up half the settlement with homemade explosives. Even though the snowfall was pretty light, it would probably be enough to shut down the event anyway and save her a trek through the cold.
And in the World Before, she had a pretty quiet social life. She had a couple friends, went to a couple parties, and spent one disastrous night at a club. But her life had really boiled down to her sister, her mom, and her survival training. It had been tough and it had only gotten harder when her dad had left. And then things took a straight nosedive into living nightmare territory.
Things were better a lot better now, but she was still an adult with adult responsibilities. For once, it would be nice just to be a girl, having fun with her friends.
Big deal if those friends happened to ageless demigod warriors. A girl's got to adapt.
"Oh what the hell." She accepted the glass and downed the shot in go.
The Watchers cheered even as she coughed and her eyes watered.
"Nope, nope, that was not a good idea." She scrunched her nose and shook her head. "That felt like swallowing nail polish remover."
"Then we should switch it up," Howler said cheerfully, refilling her glass with a shot of whiskey. He waved Thermo aside when he tried to offer her juice as chaser for her burning throat. "None of that for you, Maggot Slayer. Real warriors wash down their drink with more drink."
He raised his bottle of whiskey. "To the Maggot Slayer."
Thermo raised his own bottle. "To brotherhood."
And so each Watcher followed in a circle, reciting their own toast.
"To glory."
"To honor. Lost and found."
"To the fallen and the Fallen."
"To those still with us."
"To victory. Or," Hawk gave a wry shrug. "To not dying."
They had done this before. She could see it in their eyes as they went around-being here but not here.
And now they waited for her addition.
In the silence, she contemplated all they had lost and all they had endured.
To your Daughters of Men and your children.
To dumb luck, because I'm here and they're not.
To you, for not hating me and Raffe for it.
She cleared her throat to choke back the emotion. She smiled and shrugged. "To family."
"To family," they echoed.
She downed her drink and they took swigs from their bottles.
"Sap," Howler said, wiping his mouth.
"Shut up." Penryn coughed. "Oh, god, whiskey's worse. How can it be worse?"
Cyclone patted her head. "You really are terrible at this."
"I've made a horrible mistake."
"And you're going to make so many more!"
A little while and many drinks later...
"..and the hellions were all over Raffe and I knew I had to help so I started throwing rocks but I was nervous, you know? 'Cause I sometimes I have great aim but other times I've missed by sooo much. Anyway I managed to get some so I was thinking I was pretty good, right?" Penryn paused to breath. She was laying on the floor, with her jacket bunched up as a pillow under her hair. She wasn't cold or tired anymore. She felt all warm and bubbly inside and everyone was just so so so nice.
And she had tried candy-cane flavored vodka and it had been delicious! It tasted like syrup but Howler had taken it away because warriors don't drink candy and also something about alcohol poisoning but then he had drunk the whole bottle when he thought she wasn't looking so he was a dirty liar.
"And then, and then, and then, I threw another rock," she flung out her arm to demonstrate and hit Thermo accidently on the crotch. "And I hit Raffe right in the back and he was so mad but it was okay because he beat them all. Aw, what's wrong, Thermo? Why are you on the floor? Does your stomach hurt?"
"Something like that," he gasped weakly.
"Aw, s'okay. Come here." She pulled his head so he could share her jacket pillow and his head was resting on her shoulder. She tried to pat his cheek but ended up patting his whole face. "Just lay down for a little while. The floor is our friend."
She had come to that conclusion after she kept bumping into things and knocking stuff over. It wasn't her fault though. The world was just so wobbly.
"You've reached a new low, Maggot Slayer," Howler said. He was laid out on the couch next to her.
Cyclone chortled. "Literally."
"Guys, guys, guys, I want to make an announcement!" She grabbed the nearest bottle for the momentous occasion. It was empty but every time she tried to look for a full one they disappeared. Funny they always turned up again near the other Watchers. "I just wanted to let you that I was lying earlier. I don't hate you at all. I think you are such wonderful, beautiful, nice, amazing people and I love you guys so, so, so much. Except Howler."
"Boo, Maggot Slayer. Booooooooo."
"That was beautiful, Penryn." Cyclone sniffed. He laid his head down on her knees and patted her foot. "We love you, too. And the floor, too. We love the floor."
Cyclone was sooo drunk. Some people just couldn't handle their alcohol.
"We should do something to celebrate. We should make some snowmen." She gasped and sat up fast. "We should make snow angels! I bet you would make the best snow angels ever!"
"Whatever snow angels are, they sound offensive as hell," Hawk said. He was wearing her bobble hat and playing with the bobble.
"It's probably better than snowmen though," Howler said.
"They're both great! Let's go make some now!"
With great effort, she managed to scramble up to standing. Howler groaned.
"You can't run out in the snow."
"Yes, I can! I'm not cold anymore. I don't even need my jacket!"
"Actually, alcohol makes your blood vessels dilate so while you feel warmer you actually get colder-"
"Shush your face, Thermo," said Penryn. "We don't have time for your beautiful nonsense. We have snow angels to make."
"Of course you'd be a stupid drunk," Hawk said. "A stupid, happy drunk."
"Then she fits right in with the rest of you idiots."
"Raffe!" Penryn climbed over the couch (and a cursing Howler) to hurry to him. She threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly. "Raffe, Raffe, Raffe!"
"You think she's happy to see you, boss?"
"Shut up, Howler." Raffe kicked the door shut behind him.
"I am happy to see you!" She leaned back to touch his face. His beautiful, beautiful face. And his eyes. So pretty. She tried to poke them but Raffe wouldn't let her. She wrapped her arms around his neck. "My valiant pig farmer."
"Pig farmer? Is that some kind of roleplay?"
"Shut up, Cyclone." Raffe cupped Penryn's face and took a load of her dumb, goofy expression. "Jesus, how much has she had to drink?"
"Only a few shots," Thermo said from the floor. "We cut her off once she started getting all giggly and tripping over things."
"But she's managed to tell some very interesting stories about you, boss," Howler said, waggling his eyebrows.
Raffe swore to himself that he would exact his vengeance tomorrow morning, but for now he had more pressing issues.
"We're going home now," he said. He went over and yanked her jacket from under Thermo's head. He tried to help her put it on but it was made all the more difficult by her trying to take it off at the same time.
"I don't want to go home," Penryn said. "I want to stay here and be merry and drink candy cane vodka."
"And I don't want you to drunkenly wander out into the snow and die of hypothermia." He had finally wrestled her into the jacket but now she was missing one of her mittens. "We can't both get what we want, and since I'm bigger and sober, I win."
"You always win everything." Penryn pouted. "You even won my heart."
"I can't wait until you're sober, because I've going to hold that line over you for the rest of your life."
She could live without a glove. He snatched her stupid bobble hat off of Hawk and jammed onto her head. There-she wouldn't freeze on the flight back.
"Come on, let's go." He led her outside as she waved goodbye to the Watchers, scooped her up into his arms, and took off into the wintery night.
"Penryn?"
Raffe turned to Paige, smoothly pushing the bedroom door shut behind Penryn and standing in front of it, keeping a firm grip on the handle.
"Hey, kid," he said. "What are you doing out of bed?"
"I woke up." Paige rubbed a hand over the scars on her jaw-a nervous habit. Despite living in the same apartment for a couple months, she was still shy around him.
"Is my sister ok?"
"Of course."
A loud thump came from inside the bedroom, followed by a crash.
"...she's not feeling well." Something told him that Penryn absolutely did not want her baby sister to see her shitfaced. "She's feeling a little lightheaded. And she'll have a headache and be nauseous in the morning. Probably. I'm guessing. Let's not bother your mother about this, alright?"
"Alright."
There was an awkward pause.
Penryn always helped with her sister's bedtime when she had the chance. Raffe tried to remember what that entailed.
"Do you...need help brushing your teeth?"
"No, I already did that. And I'm eight."
"Oh. Good."
"Thank you for asking."
"Sure."
Paige, proving herself to be bolder than eons-old warriors in the ways that little girls were, went over and gave him a gentle hug.
"Good night, Raffe."
"Thanks-I mean, good night." He patted her head.
Mercifully, she kept it short and went back to bed.
Raffe stood in the hallway, wondering why it had been easier on him to deal with Paige when he thought of her as a flesh-eating monster instead of a little girl. It was probably a serious character flaw.
When he slipped back into the bedroom, he found Penryn sitting and wiggling on the ground, with the jacket stuck over her torso and her head. She had forgotten to unzip it.
He shoved it back down so he could unzip it for her. She broke into that dumb, goofy smile when he uncovered her face and she could see him.
"Found you." She kissed his nose and laughed.
"Give the girl a prize." He pulled off her jacket and maneuvered her arms up so he could ease her out of her shirt.
He lifted her up and sat her on the edge of their bed. She immediately flopped down to stare at the ceiling while he wrestled her shoes, socks, and pants off.
He considered digging up some night clothes, but decided that the strange, full-body underwear she had insisted on wearing for the cold would be enough. He could just pile blankets on her to keep away the chill and trying to dress her in this state was about as productive as trying to slip a wet noodle into a straw.
He would keep her from doing bodily harm to herself, get her to go to sleep, and then mercilessly tease her about this tomorrow. Simple enough plan.
"Raffe! RaffeRaffeRaffe!" She sat up and tugged him up by the hair to her eye level.
"Ow, ow. Penryn, I'm here, I'm here."
"So sweet. Sweet Raffe." She slung her arms around his neck. "I'm the luckiest girl in the world. I love you so, so much."
"I know."
"And you love me."
"Sometimes."
"Liar." She tried to bite his nose. What was with Drunk Penryn and her obsession with his face?
"Penryn." He held her firmly by the shoulders and tried to look serious, but it felt about as dignified as disciplining a puppy. "You're going to go to bed now. We both have a lot to do tomorrow and you have the council meeting early in the morning-"
"Nu-uh. I'm not going to that." She grabbed his hands, and stood up, dragging him up with her. "Dance with me."
She looped her arms around his neck and rocked side to side.
"This is a slow dance. You have to sway, Raffe."
"Is that what you're doing? You look like a broken upside pendulum."
"If it's so easy, do it, Mr. Know-it-all."
"You really need to go to sleep." But his hands were already curling over her hips, gently guiding her motions with his own. "Even if you're planning on taking a lazy day."
"Nope. Not a lazy day if you're out of a job."
"What? What happened?"
"I told the council to stuff it. Well, not really, but I wish I did tell them to stuff it. That's a weird saying, isn't it? You think that it would be more offensive if they were the ones getting stuffed..."
She couldn't look at him. She was staring at her feet, babbling to the floor.
"Penryn." He stopped swaying with her. He took her chin and tilted her face up to his. "Why did you leave the council?"
She shrugged. "Because I love you, silly. And you love me."
"I think we've already covered this."
"It's not just that, though. You make me happy. You make me so, so, so happy. I've never been happier than when I'm with you. Not even before...before everything."
Fragile wasn't a word that he associated with Penryn. Not after everything they had been through together. But inside the rundown building they called a home, in a world in near utter ruin, and with so much resting on her shoulders, it scared him that this was the best she's gotten out of life. His Daughter of Man was as tough as they come, but there was so much vulnerability that even he wasn't allowed to see.
"You're my family now, Raffe. And your family's my family now, too."
It all clicked in place. "The Watchers. The council wants them gone."
Penryn scowled at his chest. "Today in meeting, Paulson said it wasn't enough that the angel camp was returning to their world. He said that all the angels should leave the settlement, except you. 'Cause you're acceptable enough. And I told the council they could vote however they want, but if the Watchers so do I. And then I left and now they're probably going to tell us to get out tomorrow."
He studied her as she leaned against his chest. In the state she was in, she needed all the help she could get to stay standing upright just as much as she needed the emotional support.
His silly, sweet Daughter of Man. His brave and loyal fool.
He sat down on their bed, pulling her onto his lap. She tucked her head into the crook of his shoulder. Her fingers traced the outside of his wing joints.
"Looks like we're going to be homeless. Genius move."
"Sorry. Don't be mad, though. I didn't mean to mess everything up."
"So you're just a natural at being a screw up?"
She socked his arm. "You're a terrible boyfriend. You're supposed to make me feel better, not badder."
"I'm not your boyfriend, Penryn. I'm the idiot that's devoted himself to making the biggest pain in the ass that he's ever come across happy."
"Aw." She smiled and nestled closer to him. "Even when you're mean, it make me all gooey inside."
He pressed his lips to her temple.
"Seriously. Thank you for looking out for my team."
"Don't be stupid. They're your family and that makes them my family. You stick with family no matter what. We'll be alright though, won't we? You and me and Paige and Mom and the Watchers-we'll find somewhere nice to live."
"Wherever you want. Consider it yours." If the entire council had two brain cells to rub together, they would know they couldn't lose Penryn. Particularly over angels that had fought on the side of humans in the Battle of Half Moon Bay. But Raffe thought it'd be kinder to let the council's groveling be a special surprise for her.
"See? You're so so sooo good at making me happy."
"Of course I am." He kissed her smiling lips. "When am I ever not good at anything?"
Because that's what she deserved from him. The very best.
He was so stupidly, desperately in love with this foolish Daughter of Man and he wouldn't have it any other way.
He was going to kill her.
"Hey, Raffe. Are you religious? 'Cause you're the answer to all my prayers."
"Hey, Raffe. Do you sit on a pile of sugar? 'Cause you have a sweet ass."
"Hey, hey, hey, Raffe. Do you know what kind of vegetable you are? A cute-cumber!"
Nonstop. For the past. Fucking. Hour.
Just when he thought he had managed to wrangle her into bed, she seemed to get a second wind when her head hit the pillow.
They were laying on their bed, with his arm firmly on her waist to keep her pinned down. He'd hoped that if he kept her horizontal long enough, that she'd eventually just pass out from exhaustion, but no. Drunk Penryn was apparently a tireless source of lame pick up lines.
"Go the fuck to sleep."
"Hey, Raffe. Did it-it-did it-" Before she could even start, she dissolved into giggles.
A knot of dread formed at the pit of his stomach. She wouldn't…
"Hey, Raffe-"
"Don't do this."
"-did it hurt?"
"I will smother you, I swear to God."
"When you fell from heaven? 'Cause-"
"Goddammit, no."
"'Cause you're an angel." She burst into a fit of laughter as she buried her head in the crook of his shoulder. "Get it? Get it? It's funny because you are a real angel?"
"I hate you so much."
"Aw, don't be mad. I had to do it." She wiggled out from under his arm to straddle his waist.
"I bet I can make you happy again," she whispered, leaning in.
He groaned and used two fingers to push her head back.
"Christ, your breath smells like vodka and candy," he complained, but she simply moved to kiss and nibble his jawline. She didn't seem to be offended. Probably because his body was so used to her weight and shape that it immediately responded to her amorous attention. Particularly the parts of his body that didn't give a damn about her breath or how she was wasted out of her mind.
"Penryn, come on…"
"Mmm." She nuzzled his neck and pressed her body closer to his. "Feels nice."
"I know, but you really need to get some rest." But his fingers were already curling over her hip. Her breath, steady and hot, tickled his neck, sent a pleasing tingle down his spine…
...until she went completely slack and he realized why her breathing had been so steady.
"Now you decided to fall asleep," he muttered. He scrubbed a hand over his face. It wasn't as if he was going to let anything happen, but still.
He tried to gently pry her off him, but she only clung tighter. And so he lay there-tired, irritated, and horny-with Penryn sprawled on him.
He couldn't imagine where else he'd rather be than here.
That made him an idiot, but at least he was a happy one.
