Sorry it took a little while! Please forgive me! I have been so busy but im doing my best to update more often! I think im slowly developing writers block. I have a few ideas but they arent very good, and i dont have enough creative juices at the moment to write good enough chapters. If you have any ideas, PM me or leave a review!
Can I just say thankyou SOOOO much to everyone who reviewed :)
Chris looked at him for a few seconds in complete shock. Was Darren serious? He took a second look into Darren's eyes. Wait, of course he was serious, Darren joked about many things but homosexuality he knew, was something Darren would never joke about. Ever.
Chris knew that right now was probably not the best time to start hitting on his best friend. He knew exactly what was running through Darren's mind right now. Was Chris going to hate him? Would he ever talk to Darren again? Chris knew what he was going through, which meant he also knew that having his best, gay friend trying to fuck him senseless wasn't the best option. He knew that right now, every possible negative outcome was going through Darren's head. He knew that every move, every flick of his eyes, and every fidget was being analysed so carefully for any signs that he might react badly. He also knew that when he had come out, what he needed to hear was that his best friend would treat him the same way as ever, not try to get further away from him as if he were contagious.
"That's great!" Chris blurted out. Horrified, he looked down at his hands resting lightly in his lap. What the fuck? What was he thinking? That's great?! Brilliant, genius.
Darren looked at Chris expectantly terrified that Chris would blow up, thinking it was a joke. Would Chris still want to know him? Would he hate him? All Darren wanted in that very moment was for Chris to say that everything would be alright. He needed to know that if all else failed, and everyone left him, he would still have Chris.
"That's great!" Darren looked at him. That's….. Great? He thought to himself. Well, it was better than it could have been. Darren was still a little confused. "Well- I mean- I- Uhh. Yea, that's really fine that's all." Chris managed to force out an embarrassed laugh.
"So… you still want to know me? You're cool with it and everything?
'Hey,' Chris said to Darren, 'I know this is going to be hard for you to deal with, believe me. But you have to accept yourself first of all. This is who you are. You can't change it, no matter how hard you might want to.
Darren looked as if he was going to interrupt. 'I know, you are completely fine with gays and lesbians and all that jazz, but being one is different. This makes you who you are. You don't have to act or speak differently. You just have to be you. That is who all the fans have fallen in love with. They don't care what you look like, or what your sexual orientation is. Your family and the rest of the glee cast will, of course, support and love you no matter what. Out and proud, you used to say to me.' Chris added with a smile. Darren was still struggling within himself
'But what about the headlines? The paparazzi?' He whispered.
'Who said you have to tell them? And to be bluntly obvious, most people who aren't fans of glee, or Starkid think you're gay anyways. You don't exactly act like the straightest guy on the planet.' Darren laughed and nodded. He let his head rest on the back of the sofa, his eyes falling closed. Chris smiled affectionately at the man beside him, unbeknownst to Darren. Darren slid further away from Chris and rested his head in Chris' lap. Chris tangled his fingers into Darren's curly, black hair and let his head fall back onto the sofa behind him, content with the closeness that Darren provided him with.
Darren couldn't meet Chris' eyes. He knew everything
Chris was saying was true, but it barely made him feel any better. He knew that ultimately, he would have to accept himself, whether he liked it or not. But why was it so hard?! He was completely okay with homosexuals, it's not like this should be any different! He took a few deep breaths and listened to Chris as he finished up. But the headlines! And the paparazzi! They were going to have a field day with this. He could imagine the headlines. 'Darren Criss lies about sexuality...', 'Darren Criss-A flaming homosexual?' But Chris was right! Why should he tell anyone? He could just keep it a huge secret. No, he couldn't do that to his family, and the rest of the glee cast for that matter. And Starkid! Argh! They would be okay with it right? But what if even Joey didn't want to know him? No that wouldn't happen. Couldn't. They would stick by him. He knew it.
It wasn't like all these thoughts hadn't run through his head before. But now that he had told someone it made all these thoughts look alarmingly real and possible. A great anxiety ran amok through Darren's chest. Darren chuckled, and let his head hang back, closing his eyes. Chris was right, he acted like a flaming gay anyways, why let the fact that he now actually was change the way he acted. He was still him. He smiled inwardly and moved so he could rest his head in Chris lap. He waited for Chris to wrap his fingers in his hair and sighed contently when he felt the slighter than slight tug of his hair as Chris tangled his fingers in it.
The slight movement on his lap jolted him from the warm envelopes of sleep. Darren moved his head again in his lap and brushed against his erection. Shit! Now was NOT the time! He groaned quietly. Not now! Any time but now! He couldn't let Darren know that he had a boner while his head was still in Chris' lap. He gently shook Darren. No response. Chris gritted his teeth. Darren was a notoriously deep sleeper. He shook harder.
'What? What's wrong?' Darren mumbled sleepily.
'Nothing, Uhh, my neck is getting sore from sleeping like this. Let's move to the bed instead.' Chris lied smoothly.
'Mmm kay' Darren responded before getting up and heading towards Chris' bedroom.
Darren had woken a few minutes before Chris. He supposed being repeatedly poked in the head might have something to do with it. He was about to tell Chris to stop, but he realised the poking was coming from the wrong side. He let a huge grin plaster itself onto his face. He kept on shuffling around, knowing that he would keep brushing Chris' boner. He felt Chris wake above him and forced himself to stop smiling. He felt Chris shake him and was about to wake up, but remembered his reputation as the heaviest sleeper most people knew. He forced himself to stay still and not smile. He nearly grinned in spite of himself but covered it up with a yawn as he pretended that he just woke up.
'What? What's wrong?' he mumbled in his best i just woke up voice. He nodded as Chris pleaded his case and agreed quickly. He stood up and pretending he was still half asleep, stumbled towards Chris bedroom, flopping down on the bed as he heard Chris walk in behind him. Chris, not to Darren's surprise, went to the bathroom muttering some excuse about needing to go to the toilet. Darren smirked to himself in the dark and wondered what exactly Christopher Colfer was doing in said bathroom.
Chris shut the door and breathed a sigh of relief. He then took another few deep breaths to calm his breathing and will his unfortunate erection away. He shoved his hands down his pants roughly and grabbed his now aching cock. His hand gripping his leaking member felt incredible but he had to remind himself that the man of his dreams was only a thin door away and if he walked in, or heard him, it would be so incredibly awkward. He turned the tap on gently and splashed the cold water over his cock. He winced as the water hit him, sending a shiver down his spine. It was so cold it almost hurt, but to his reluctant relief, his boner slowly went down, leaving him shivering slightly from the cold. He dried himself off and pulled his pants up. He walked back out into the bedroom and Darren turned to look at him.
'Alright?' He asked, noticing the way Chris' arms were wrapped around himself.
'Yea, the tiles are cold in the bathroom.' He gave a shaky laugh. Darren lifted up the covers and shuffled backwards, giving Chris some space to get in next to him. Chris jumped in making the bed bounce violently. He snuggled up close to Darren and made sure there were no gaps where the cold air could get in. He soon drifted off into a light sleep, knowing that he and Darren had all morning to sleep if they wanted.
Darren woke to the inviting aroma of pancakes and bacon. Swinging his feet over the side of the bed, he jumped up and walked into the kitchen, still stretching and yawning. Chris turned around, smiling as Darren padded into the kitchen and walked over to the bacon, resting on a plate, sniffing and then nodding in approval.
'I'm glad you approve.' Chris said mockingly, a smile playing on his lips. He put the plate of pancakes in front of Darren and brought out two plates from the cupboard beneath the counter. He sat down on a stool next to Darren and helped himself. He nodded to Darren and continued eating. Darren laughed to himself slightly but proceeded to pull two pancakes off the plate and the crispier bits of the bacon.
'So how are you feeling?' Chris asked him. He tilted his head from side to side as he replied.
'Yeah, alright. Not so anxious or anything now, but I'm still nervous about telling everyone else.' He gave a weak laugh.
'You only have to tell them when you're ready. You'll always be their son. Remember that.' Chris told Darren. Darren felt some of his nerves disappear. He rested his head on Chris' shoulder and sighed again.
Soon after getting ready, Darren and Chris went to the movies. They had both been dying to see Ted.
'Popcornnnn!' Darren sang as he walked over to the candy bar. Chris turned the other way, pretending he had no idea who this 25 year old man singing about popcorn was. 'Popcorn pops, and tastes yummy and goes into my mouth.' Chris promptly turned bright red. You would never guess that Darren was a star song writer by the lyrics being made up at the moment. He would have to work on his impromptu skills.
'Come on Darren, we have to go pay now,' he said slowly and carefully, as if he were speaking to someone with a disability. 'We don't want to get in the nice peoples way.' He said, smiling apologetically at a mother and her two children. Darren turned to him as they entered the cinema. 'Seriously? What was that about?'
''Well I had to give them a reason you were acting so strange, plus, there weren't any fans around, or the paps for that matter. You're just so weird sometimes!' He laughed. He could see Darren trying not to laugh and knew he wasn't mad at him. 'C'mon. I don't want to miss the beginning.'
They were laughing and giggling together as they left the cinema. They turned a few heads but they were too delirious with laughter to care at all. They walked outside into the parking light and Chris blinked a few times and squinted his eyes, turning his head down. The sun was shining bright and strong and was shining directly into the eyes of anyone who was walking out of the cinema at the time. Darren grinned at Chris as they got into the car.
'What?' Chris asked.
'Nothing, nothing at all.' Chris shot him a suspicious look and turned back to the steering wheel, putting the car in drive and driving off. Darren looked out the window. A sad look was cast over his face suddenly and Chris glanced concernedly over at Darren.
'Don't worry. They'll be fine with it. Promise.' Chris said to Darren reassuringly.'
Darren looked out the car window. He ought to tell his parents. It would be a good start. He knew that much. Growing up in an extremely accepting neighbourhood family meant that he was sure his parents would accept him. It might take a bit of getting used to for his dad, but he knew that ultimately, his dad would be cool with it. His mum and his brother of course would have no qualms whatsoever, when he got home. That's when he would tell them, and Joey. He would start off with Joey. Joey had always said that he'd love Darren no matter what.
'Don't worry. They'll be fine with it. Promise.' Chris said to him, completely reading his mind.
'Darren laughed, choking back a sob, of happiness of course. How was he so lucky to be surrounded by so many incredible, loving people?
Soon after they arrived home and they both went into Chris apartment.
Darren looked at Chris, smiling genuinely, his smile widening as Chris gave him an affectionate smile back.
He loved him.
Chapter End Notes:
Ahhh! I hope you enjoyed it! I enjoyed writing it hehehe. Leave a review. Please?! With a cherry on top?! Yes?! Okay good. You see? You have to now :)
