Chapter 12
"I am everything you want, I am everything you need, I am everything inside of you that you wish you could be, I say all the right things at exactly the right time but I mean nothing to you and I don't know why?" – Vertical Horizon (Everything You Want)
Dean couldn't afford to stay until New Year's; he felt that the longer they stayed the longer Ruby would have to disappear. He was busy packing the secret trunk compartment in the Impala when Sam and Gabriel walked out of the house with their things, Cas followed close behind and Bobby behind him. Dean watched his brother hug Bobby and thank him as did Gabriel, Bobby placed his hand on Gabriel's stomach one more time and smiled and laughed a little before patting their shoulders and letting them walk away. He watched Cas take the old hunter into a slight hug, an almost lonesome look in his eyes. Dean would've stared longer, but a slight kick shook him out of his trance.
The baby was kicking! He was almost shocked, Dean didn't know whether to cry or laugh or scream. He was finally feeling something within other than the "finger tap" sensation he'd been feeling before. He smiled and looked up.
"Cas." He said breathlessly.
"Yes Dean?" Cas seemed tired, like he could care a less about anything right now.
"Cas I," Dean hesitated when he saw the look in the angel's eyes. "Never mind…"
Dean and Cas both hesitated to move or break each other's gaze for a moment. There was a knowing look, as if each man wanted to tell the other something, but nothing was spoken before the angel got into the backseat of the Impala with his brother. Dean's pride found it impossible for him to say anything; he simply nodded to Bobby telling him thanks for Christmas.
"If you boys need anything," Bobby said. "Call me this time yah idjits."
Dean smirked, he climbed into the Impala's driver's seat and started the car, Sam hopped in the passenger side and the two angels were seated comfortably in the back. Dean hit the gas and the car sped off, leaving a cloud of dust behind it on the way out of Bobby's junkyard.
SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN
Tensions in the vehicle had actually risen about five hundred percent if that was possible. Sam had been actually arguing with Dean about leaving so fast and that every time they finally had a moment's rest Dean whisked them away again. Dean counter-argued meanwhile Cas remained silent. Gabriel had chosen not to speak since he had been annoying Dean earlier again this time about changing the radio station. The car literally would spontaneously combusted from the fuming rage that was radiating off of both Dean and Sam.
"That's great it starts with an earthquake…" the radio sang.
"Hey Dean-o Samsquatch," Gabriel smirked. "It's you guys' song."
Gabriel laughed; the brothers didn't seem to catch his attempt at humor. He huffed and tried again.
"You know cuz he's singing about the end of the world and all that?" Gabriel stated, cocking his head from the back seat.
"Eye of the hurricane listen to yourself churn," Gabriel sang along. "World serves its own needs…"
Gabriel sang his way through the first verse smiling and actually giggling at himself. Sam looked back in the mirror only once, he covered his mouth in an attempt to not laugh too.
"It's the end of the world as we know it." Gabriel sang, louder this time.
"It's the end of the world as we know it." Sam smirked and looked over at his brother, Dean finally met his gaze.
"It's the end of the world as we know it," Dean found himself smiling and singing along too. "And I feel fine."
The car suddenly came alive, Dean turned up the song. Gabriel proclaimed twice that this was his favorite band by far. Cas was only just surprised at the antics of the men around him.
"It really is our song Sammy!" Dean yelled over the music and drummed on the steering wheel.
Sam laughed, more than Dean had seen in awhile. It actually put the hunter at ease.
"The other night I tripped a nice continental drift divide!" Gabriel sang.
"Mount St. Edelite." Sam laughed his way through his line.
"LEONARD BERNSTEIN!" the trio practically yelled and laughed along with each other.
The trio sang the various parts of the song, laughing and smiling at each other. Cas even joined in a little, although he was at a loss for lyrics he certainly could laugh along with the boys and Gabriel. Before long all the tension was gone, if only for a mere moment.
SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN
The boys had made their way into another motel room, another night of crappy beds and cheap porn on the TV, home sweet home. Sam and Dean grabbed most of the vital bags and got inside before the storm was about to hit. It seemed to rain more now. Dean felt the eerie cold chill creeping up his neck again, but this time he refused to acknowledge it. He simply strutted forward wanting to get inside as fast as possible before it poured. All four guys worked diligently to secure the secret compartment and bring the other bags in. The sky suddenly opened up and everyone ran to the room.
All four of them were drenched. Dean shed his jacket and slung it over a chair. Sam hung his up in the bathroom to dry out and took Gabriel's with him. Cas even took his off and hung it up ever so neatly in the closet.
"M'cold Sammy." Gabriel shivered a little, the babies kicking due to his discomfort. Sam smiled and lay down with the archangel in his bed, spooning him close and playing with his hair.
"Is that better?" Sam asked.
"Much." Gabriel snuggled up under Sam's chin, so his head was on his chest; he rhythmically rubbed his stomach, trying to soothe the infants inside.
"There there babies," Gabriel cooed, the rest of the world seeming almost non-existent at the point. "Mama's here it's ok, sssh don't be scared."
Dean studied the scene before him with kind eyes. He wanted so badly to have this, what Sam was so desperately trying to establish with Gabriel, a life, a real life. But the war between Dean's hopes and his hubris was one that his hopes could never win.
"They feed off of your energy," Gabriel explained, mostly to Sam but Dean found himself listening. "If I'm sad they're sad, angry same thing, if I'm cold they're cold." He placed Sam's hand on top of his and moved it in sync with his hand. The babies kicked a little more, moving around and not stopping anytime soon.
"It's…" Sam said, smiling. "It's beautiful Gabe."
Dean sighed; he walked off into the other bedroom that he had claimed this time. Cas didn't really specify where he wanted to sleep, but then again he didn't sleep so Dean didn't really see it as a big deal. Dean stripped down to his boxers and an old grey AC/DC t-shirt. He pulled out his clothes for the next day and his toothbrush but not before his phone rang.
Caller ID: Bobby Singer
"Bobby?" Dean was confused.
"Hey Dean," Bobby said. "You boys make it somewhere ok?"
"Yeah," Dean cocked an eyebrow upwards. "Is everything ok?"
"Yeah everything's fine I just wanted to make sure," Bobby replied. "What with Ruby and all, you boys get some rest ok, stay alert, bye."
"Bye," Dean hung up. "Bobby…"
SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN – SPN
Dean woke up in a sweat and panic. He breathed heavily, gasping slightly at every breath as if he'd been drowning. The dream had been so real. It was as if he was there again…hell was really trying to catch up with him again. The blood and the demons and the horrors had been right there again.
Dean Winchester didn't cry, not unless he had a good reason. This seemed like a good enough one…
He let a couple of tears fall in the darkness where no one could see them. He didn't like feeling weak, not even in front of himself. It felt degrading like someone was trying to get him to surrender. Dean Winchester had three rules, he didn't cry, he didn't dance, and he most certainly didn't surrender.
Dean suddenly felt warmth on his cheek. He looked up to see Cas, the man sighed and cupped Dean's tear stained cheek, his fingers feeling just right upon Dean's cheek and chin bone. The touch was comforting; Dean felt lighter as if the weight of the world that was on his shoulders had somehow swept away into an ocean, never to be seen again.
He stared into Cas' blue eyes. They were calm and serene, almost begging him to step right into them. The gaze between the two was unbroken until Cas smoothed Dean's hair back and wiped a few tears with his thumb.
"Go to sleep Dean." Cas said, nothing more.
"Cas…" Dean pleaded.
"I'll be here," Cas nodded. "I'll be watching."
Turn's out, that was all Dean needed that night. He soon fell back asleep and was pleasantly greeted by no dreams of any kind what so ever.
Read and Review
Dean wants a family…bad…but will he let pride get the best of him?
Bobby, calling Dean? Unheard of, but alrighty then.
Nice bonding moment in the car with R.E.M I have a head cannon that it's Gabriel's favorite band :3 sue me.
More to come soon.