Kakashi had been resting in bed when he heard someone pounding on his door. He was under doctors' orders to rest for a day or so, but he got up and went downstairs to see who it was. It's probably Guy again, trying to get me to do more ridiculous training with him to build back up my strength. Kakashi rolled his eyes at the thought and opened the door, surprised to find, not Guy, but Shi; who he hadn't known was released yet.

"Shi?" She doesn't look too good.

"K-Kakashi…"

Shi suddenly collapsed and Kakashi quickly caught her, keeping her from hitting the ground, but very confused and concerned, not knowing what was going on.

"Shi! Hey! Can you hear me?"

He tried to wake her up, but there was no response and he went into shinobi mode, doing his best to try and figure out what was wrong. Her chakra really is low. He touched her face and frowned, feeling just how warm to the touch she was. A fever too. Just what is she doing here? He picked her up, expecting some difficulty since he's been out of commission, but was shocked at how little she weighed. He brought her upstairs and laid her down in the spare guest room he had, going ahead and removing the flak jacket and scarf she was wearing. A new flak jacket? She's been promoted then, but that doesn't explain why she's here or where she's been for the past couple months. Wherever the council has had her, they obviously haven't been treating her well.

Kakashi frowned, reaching out and searching for any weapons that Shi would normally have on her, but found nothing. She's normally laced to the teeth with weapons, but she doesn't even have her sword. Just what is going on? He took notice of her form then, concern lacing his features at just how gaunt she was and the way he could see her clothes hanging off her instead of the way they used to hug her curves and muscles. She's far too thin. She's always been fairly attractive though, as much as she goes about trying to hide it. She's not someone I'd normally go for either, but I can't say I don't have some feelings for her... I need to focus. He then went and got a small towel from the bathroom, wetting it and ringing it out, returning and placing it on her forehead. I should probably get some medicine for her while she's still asleep since I doubt she'll appreciate it if I take her to the hospital. Kakashi smiled a bit at remembering what happened last time she was at a hospital and headed out to stop by the hospital pharmacy for some medicine.

When he returned, he went upstairs and was surprised to find her not in the bed.

"Shi?" He called out, senses searching the room for any sign of her.

He went quiet and heard the very soft shuffling sound coming from the closet. Unsure what Shi could be doing in there, he slowly and cautiously approached, opening the door and finding her curled up in a ball on the ground, hands covering her ears with her eyes clenched shut. He reached out towards her carefully.

"Shi?"

She flinched, curling up tighter and mouthing the words 'too loud'. Understanding what she was trying to say, Kakashi tried to find a way to help. Something must be wrong. This happened before, in the Land of Waves. I believe she mentioned everything being too loud and something about her senses. Kakashi went into his room and managed to find some earplugs after searching a while, returning and holding them out to Shi, watching as she hesitantly opened her eyes and stared at his hand. Kakashi gave her a small smile and she reluctantly took them, putting them in her ears and letting out a small sigh.

"T-Thank you." She said quietly, but not leaving the closet.

Kakashi nodded and held up the bag with the medicine, grinning and encouraging her to come out and return to the bed.

"So what are you doing here, Shi?" He asked, knowing that she could probably still hear him despite the earplugs.

She took the medicine, swallowing it along with the cup of water Kakashi handed her, and stared down at the cup silently for a while. Her guard's back up. Kakashi thought. She's retreated back inside herself again. It's to be expected, considering the circumstances, but it… bothers me a bit… I miss her smile already. Kakashi shook the thought from his head and instead went about pulling out the miso soup he'd bought from a restaurant on his way back.

"It should still be warm." He said, dropping the previous question since Shi apparently didn't wish to speak about it, and handing her the bowl of soup.

She took it, holding it in her hands, but not eating it. Kakashi was concerned and thought that perhaps it was because he was there watching, so he got up to leave, but Shi spoke just as he did so.

"N-Naruto said that you were… hurt."

Kakashi turned, smiling a bit. "Well, I'm alright now. You're the one who seems to be worse off in this case."

Shi nodded, head bowed and she drank some of the soup, bringing the bowl to her lips carefully. Her voice was pretty raw. I wonder how long it's been since she spoke… or if she's been—Kakashi pushed the thought from his mind and went downstairs, putting away a few extra groceries he'd picked up. After a moment though, he felt Shi's presence behind him, as weak as it was, and turned to see her holding her bowl; scarf back around her face.

"Thank you." She muttered again as he took the bowl from her. "I apologize for bothering you."

She made to leave, but Kakashi could see how much she was struggling and stopped her with a hand on her wrist.

"Now, now, Shi. You and I both know you're not exactly in the best shape."

"I can make it home." She said, though Kakashi could feel her arm shaking from exertion in his hand.

"You'll make it there, but what should happen if you collapse again? Hm?" Kakashi smiled as she looked back at him and she seemed to give in.

"What would you suggest…?" She said, dropping her head and rubbing her temples with her free hand.

"Stay here."

Shi lifted her head with a frown, hardly noticeable under her scarf. "With you…?"

Kakashi continued to grin innocently, visible eye closed in a u-shape, and Shi reluctantly sighed.

"Very well."

"Good! Now head on back to bed. You'll need your rest. I'll wake you up tomorrow morning for breakfast."

Shi grumbled quietly, but headed back upstairs, leaving Kakashi to chuckle to himself. She can be so cute sometimes. It's a shame we're both ninja. Relationships don't work out very well. That… and I doubt she'd fall for my advances. Kakashi went ahead and headed upstairs to his own room, preparing to sleep as well, removing his forehead protector and other extra clothing; leaving him in a pair of boxer shorts and his usual sleeveless shirt-mask combo. He climbed into bed and let out a slow sigh, a small grin still on his face. Doesn't mean it won't hurt to try though. Who knows, maybe I can get it to work out.

The next morning, I awoke feeling much better. My fever had gone down quite a bit and my senses were back to their usual level, and waking up to the smell of food wasn't too bad either. Kakashi hadn't yet come to get me for breakfast, so I headed into the bathroom to shower. It felt great to get off the grimy clothes I had been wearing and wash off all the dirt and sweat I had accumulated over the past two months in solitary confinement. What's more, I actually felt very at home here. I wouldn't have expected Kakashi's house to be so… comfortable. It's the first time I've felt so at home since I've been in Konoha.

I sighed quietly, getting out of the shower only to stare down at myself with a miniscule frown. I had lost a lot of weight. Enough so, that my hips and ribs were showing rather boldly on my gaunt body. I was most certainly underweight now, and could tell just by looking that my muscle mass had gone down slightly as well, despite my previous attempts to keep in shape while in the cell. My hair was longer now as well, reaching just past the bottom of my ears and brushing the back of my neck. I pinched some auburn hair between my two fingers and let out another sigh, before staring at the pile of clothes on the ground, practically radiating a stinky smell. Do I really have to put those back on?

"Shi?" A voice said, following a couple of knocks on the door. "If you want, you could borrow some of my clothes. I doubt yours are going to be pleasant to wear…"

I nodded, realizing that he couldn't see me and replied quietly. "Okay."

"I'll leave them by the door."

I heard him leave and hesitantly opened the door and pulled the clothes inside. It was just a simple pair of boxer shorts, some pants that cut off just below the knee, and one of his sleeveless mask-shirts. I put them on and frowned as the edge of his pants reached my heel, but the shirt fit fairly well. It wasn't as tight as it was on Kakashi, but the mask still hid my face and it wasn't hanging as loosely as his pants were. Once finished, I gathered up my dirty clothes and headed downstairs to find Kakashi smirking at me.

"Well don't you look cute." He said, chuckling.

I flushed red, looking down at the pants as they dragged on the floor, before looking back up with a small glare.

"Shut it." I grumbled, walking over to the table and sitting down.

Kakashi placed some food in front of me and I heartily dug in, mentally questioning how Kakashi knew how to cook. Because I can't cook very well at all. I can only do the basic things like udon and rabbit… Kakashi seemed to have read my mind.

"I learned how to cook when I was younger. It comes in handy when you live alone and have a low budget."

I nodded, holding my plate out for seconds which had Kakashi chuckling.

"It's good to know you still have your appetite."

I caught the hint he threw out and went quiet once more. He knows… I guess it's pretty obvious, but… am I allowed to even talk about it? And more importantly, do I even want to talk about it… Kakashi returned with my food, but instead of plowing through it like I had the first time, I sat there and stared at it for a while.

"Hey."

I looked up to see Kakashi's worried face.

"You okay?"

I slowly nodded and brought some food up to my mouth, only to stop and set it down.

"I… was in an underground cell." I said, feeling his eyes on me. "I only got water on occasion and food… was even scarcer."

He continued to stay silent as I went on.

"I was… I thought Orochimaru had me at first… Then I remembered the Hokage and…" I swallowed thickly and looked up at Kakashi, feeling tears pricking the corner of my eyes. "I couldn't save him, Kakashi. I-I was right there a-a-and…"

I clenched my eyes shut as the tears finally fell, the guilt of letting the Hokage die in front of me when I could have done something had been eating away at me for two months. And for some reason, I wanted to tell Kakashi. I wanted him to know because… perhaps he could understand. There was always that chance that he would hate me, but this pressure in my chest told me he wouldn't. That Kakashi could never hate me. And I took comfort in that, even more so, when he came over and just held me. He let me cry on him and murmured softly to me, telling me it was okay. That it wasn't my fault and I did everything I could.

And as he did this, I held him tightly, hugging him like a lifeline and I suddenly realized that he was my lifeline. He was one of the three people I trusted enough to show my weaknesses around; Naruto and the third Hokage being the only others, but one was dead and even with Naruto I hadn't done anything like crying in front of him. Kakashi was someone I genuinely cared for and in this moment, I vowed that I wouldn't let anything happen to him like what had happened with the Hokage. And maybe, just maybe, I would open myself up a bit more to him.

That afternoon, Kakashi left on a mission and I headed out as well. I would admit, it was nice being with Kakashi, but I also had other things to do, and one of those was checking up on Lee. Assuming that he would be at one or two places, I started walking to the hospital. That's right. I said walking. I knew I would get lost, but I needed the exercise after two months of static and walking to one place would do me some good. And it was about four hours later that I had realized once more how useless I was with directions.

Great. Just great. I sighed and brought my hand to my mouth, letting out a high pitched whistle to call a friend of mine. Not a few seconds later, a rather large owl landed on my shoulder and I scratched his head before asking him to find the Lee and lead me to him. I already wasted four hours trying to find the hospital. I don't need to waste more time being lost should he not be there. The owl flew off and returned a little while later, leading me to my second choice of location, which had me worried. I sent the owl off, promising a mouse for his troubles later, and hid my presence as I hopped up onto the roof of the building and laid down, staying quiet and listening to Lee and Guy as they talked.

So Lee has to get some surgery done. 50/50 chance of success with the other 50 being death… I'm worried for him, but perhaps Guy will help him make the right choice. I stared up as stars began to show up in the night sky, allowing their discussion to drift over to me.

"But just this once… it doesn't look like I'll get anywhere even if I try, even if I believe in myself! Guy-sensei… Please tell me!" Lee cried. "Why does something like this only happen to me? What should I do? Tell me!"

Lee sobbed and I felt my chest clench as I remembered everything Lee had gone through after what happened at the chunin exams. He was so strong. He kept trying and struggling to do push-ups and other exercises that he should even be trying to do in his condition. He helped push me forward with his determination and now… he's so broken. He's lost hope and may just lose the one thing that means the most to him… Being a ninja…

"For the one who never stopped working hard, the surgery will most definitely succeed!" Guy shouted, me having missed a good chunk of their conversation while worrying. "It will call forth a heavenly future. If by one in a million chance the surgery fails, then I shall die with you! Ever since I met you, my ninja way became to raise you into a great ninja. That's a promise!"

I smirked to myself as Lee wailed, most certainly having hugged Guy, and I went to get up and leave, when Guy called out from below.

"You shouldn't eavesdrop, my youthful friend. Though I'm sure Lee and I can over-look it this time."

I smiled under my scarf, rolling my eyes, before adopting my usual blank look and hopping down behind the surprised Lee.

"S-Shi?"

I pulled a hand out of my pocket and waved. "Yo."

Guy, though, immediately wailed. "No! My youthful companion! You've become tainted by my arch rival's laid-back attitude!"

I raised a brow, before finally understanding what he had said. Oh, he's saying I'm acting like Kakashi… I ignored him and went over to Lee, putting a hand on his head and messing up his hair as he stared up at me with teary eyes.

"You'll be fine." I told him, reaching up and pulling down my scarf so he could see the small smile I gave him. "You are strong."

Lee's eyes widened and I pulled my scarf back up just before he tackled me with a hug, tears soaking my new flak jacket.

"S-Shi! You're so kind! I-I will do my best! And I most certainly will not give up!"

I was unsure how to comfort him, but upon remembering what Kakashi had done, I did the same and patted his head hesitantly, telling him it will be okay though my face was a bit red in embarrassment about remembering this morning. Guy though, was immune to my obvious discomfort and pulled the two of us into his own hug shouting about our youthfulness.

"You two are the most youthful students I have ever had the pleasure of teaching! Now." he pulled away and gave us a thumbs up. "What do you say we treat ourselves to a good meal?"

Lee's eyes lit up and I shrugged, willing to go, but once we started walking, Guy spoke to me, out of Lee's earshot.

"I'm glad they finally released you, Shi."

I nodded. Me too.

"Are you alright though? You are not quite as… youthful as you should be."

I understood what he was saying, but continued to stare forward at Lee. "I am… working on it. Food was not something plentiful."

He nodded in understanding and we soon joined Lee at his favorite place to sit down and eat. The whole night, we enjoyed ourselves; Lee and Guy making it a game to try and get me to laugh by doing ridiculous things with their chopsticks and food, none of which got more than a chuckle from me. Once we had all finished and went our separate ways, I let out a sigh and scratched the back of my head before heading to the Hokage's office. I had a bad feeling nagging me in the back of my mind and, as much as I would like to ignore it, I knew there was something I needed to do. Perhaps she can help me… This… new Hokage.

The rest of that night and the next day, I had spent under the tutelage of one of Konoha's medic ninjas, learning as quickly as I could some easy healing techniques that could help postpone the death of anyone I come across. I figured it would be something handy to have and learned fairly quickly, though the first few times I tried it, I didn't do well. Once the woman had deemed me 'passable' I was summoned to the Hokage's office via a small bird.

The first time I had met her face to face, I could say I wasn't too surprised. The sake smell seemed understandable as did the pork smell, coming from her assistant's pig. The only thing that seemed odd was the woman's physical appearance. She's supposed to be Jiraiya's age? Was the first thing I thought, until I noticed a small purple gem on her forehead. I had immediately connected the dots, realizing that this was one of the seals I had encountered in my reading that the woman before me had invented. It preserved her youth though and healed her at a quick pace, from what I understood, whereas my tattoo seal was nothing more than an extra chakra container. She had proven to me quickly though, that she was not to be underestimated and her harsh attitude had me quickly respecting her as I should.

Today though, I was a bit more laid back, realizing that as harsh as she was, she was also very relaxed. That is, when she didn't have a huge pile of paperwork on her desk to go through. I guess it's a good thing I brought her this. I thought, pulling out the brand of sake I had smelled on her and placing it on her desk, earning a suspicious look.

"You better not be bribing me, Shi."

I just blinked back at her silently and tucked my hands into my pockets calmly.

"No. I like sake too."

"Hm." She hummed, putting the sake out of sight and grabbing a piece of paperwork, flipping through its pages with a long sigh. "You're not going to be pleased to hear this, but I need you to do something for me."

"A mission?"

She nodded, setting the paperwork down and pulling a hand through her hair. "Seems Sasuke has tried to leave the village and I am sending a rookie squad to retrieve him."

I swallowed, eyes narrowing seriously. "I am to assist?"

She nodded. "But not in how you think. From what I know, he's gone to join Orochimaru and has been taken by at least four of his possible experiments. As much as you believe you are capable of taking them out, Shi." She narrowed her eyes at me, obviously seeing how my hands had fisted tightly at the sound of Orochimaru's name. "I'm going to need you to get them some back up."

I nodded, not liking what I had to do, but understanding. I was still very weak from my stay in prison and I doubted I could handle all four enemies, let alone if they were in different areas.

"Who am I getting?"

She perched her chin on her hands. "Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari from Sunagakure."

They're the ones who…

"Very well."I replied, knowing better than to question their integrity to the village when my very own was also in question.

"I'd send someone with you, however the jounin are all out on missions, so you're my last option. It's a speed mission, so time is of the essence. The three of them should be able enough to help the rookies, so you are to bring them all to where they are fighting. It doesn't matter if they split up to get different enemies, but you are not to engage them. Understood?"

I nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

She scoffed. "Don't call me that… Now, there is one other part to your mission. You not only have to retrieve them and direct them to the enemies, but you must also retrieve any injured and treat them as best as you can before bringing them back to the village hospital. I am entrusting this task to you, so you better not screw it up. Got it?"

I nodded. "Yes, sir."

She gave me a look, not liking the other pronoun I had said, but she just sighed and waved her hand. "Hurry up then. Don't bother packing anything more than essentials. You need to complete this task within the day."

I bowed, and quickly left the office, poofing to my apartment and gathering water and energy bars as well as a few soldier pills and other necessities I may need for both, myself, and the injured I was going to pick up. Once finished, I hurried out of the village and began my trek to Sunagakure. Sasuke turned traitor… I understand the need for revenge, but one would think he would wait for the best opportunity. That, and I have no doubt Naruto would have helped him should he ever be attacked by this person he wanted to kill. The only thing Orochimaru has to offer him is… I trailed off, gritting my teeth as I sped through the trees. Power.

I pushed all thoughts from my mind other than getting to where I needed to be, pushing chakra into my legs to get me to Sunagakure as quickly as possible. Normally, it was a three day walk (something I had learned from my many travels), but I pushed myself and reached the edge of the forest in a few hours, legs burning as I took in the sight of the sand dunes. Now the fun part. Trying not to get lost in the dunes before reaching Sunagakure. I swallowed thickly and pulled out a single scroll from inside my pack, staring at it and hoping, praying that it would work.

Biting my thumb to draw blood, I did the hand signs and slammed my palm onto the paper seal and called out. "Summoning no jutsu!"

Poof of smoke appeared and I was more than shocked by the rather large animal that appeared before me, causing me to fall onto my backside in blatant shock. W-What the… The animal let out a snort, hoof pawing at the ground, stirring up sand as it shook its head, black mane swishing around on its neck. I-I've never seen something like this before… I-It's like the oxen that carried the caravans except… leaner and less bulky. The animal turned its long face towards me and scoffed.

"You going to just sit on the ground like an idiot, or are you going to get on. I don't have all day."

My mouth dropped open in shock and, though hidden behind my scarf, the animal seemed to understand my obvious confusion.

"Great, I've been summoned by an idiot… Look, kid, I'm a horse, alright? It's not often we get summoned so you're lucky. I'll give you that. But I'm not going to stand here all day, so hurry up and get on my back before I just leave you here in the sand."

I hesitantly got up and stepped towards the large animal. My head only went up to its shoulder and I was very confused as to how to get on it, but I soon placed my hands on its back and jumped up and onto the animal. It was odd, but for some reason, it felt almost natural to be on its back. Looking at it better, I took in just how muscular this animal was and the way its coat shined a dark brown, instead of the black I initially thought it was. I-It's a very beautiful animal… But I'm still very confused.

"Oi, you're going to need to hang on unless you want to fall off."

I looked for something to hold on to, but found nothing, obviously annoying the horse.

"Kami… Grab my mane, you idiot."

I did so, not holding too tightly for fear of hurting the animal, but when he took off, I held on for my life. It took a while before I calmed down enough to relax on the animal and actually enjoy the ride. It was far faster than how fast I could have gotten through the sand and the horse seemed to know where we're going, which was another plus.

"Hey, kid. What's your name? I can't keep calling you idiot." The horse said, eyes glancing back at me.

"S-Shi."

"Hm. I'm Shoji."

I nodded, closing my eyes and pressing my face into the back of Shoji's neck, spreading out my senses and just listening as we thundered through the desert sands. It wasn't long though, before he slowed his pace, letting me know that we were at Sunagakure. I lifted my head and as soon as we reached the gates, he stopped and turned so I could give my message to the two men guarding the gates, who also seemed shocked at the horse I was riding.

"The Hokage has sent me for Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari." I said, handing a man the scroll that Tsunade had given me, requesting the three's assistance.

He immediately ran off and delivered it, returning not a few minutes later with the three sand siblings. Gaara, the red-haired boy stepped up first, the other two gawking at the animal I was riding.

"You are the messenger from Konoha?"

I nodded. "I am to escort you to the genin team that has engaged enemies in the forest nearby."

He looked up at me. "Do you know where they are?"

Hadn't thought about that… I thought, but gave a firm nod. "I can track them."

He nodded and turned to the other two. "We must hurry."

They also nodded and we all soon took of across the desert sands, myself and Shoji taking the lead due to our speed and me having to track where everyone was. I can't find Naruto's scent quite yet, but I found Shikamaru's and… is that Lee's? I grew more concerned and headed off towards Lee's first, Gaara being the first to notice my new found eagerness.

"Do not worry." He said, not far behind me, but catching my attention. "Trust in them. They are strong."

I had a sudden flashback to me comforting Lee not more than a day ago, telling him just how strong he was, and I nodded to Gaara in understanding and relaxing once more.

"Shoji. When we reach the forest, you may go."

The horse nodded and once we reached the forest, I jumped off his back up into the trees, leaving him to disappear in a puff of smoke. Technically, I could have probably kept riding him, but the forest was narrower and tracking was going to be more difficult if we were traveling at that speed. I've located Shikamaru, Lee, and Kiba. All three engaged with an enemy. I quickly turned my head and began giving out orders.

"Shikamaru is engaged with an enemy five meters on the right and is within inches of said enemy."

"Got it." Temari said, hurrying off towards that direction.

"Kiba and Akamaru are fighting another enemy and are injured ten meters north west of our direction."

"Looks like that's me." Kankuro announced, going that way.

"And it seems Lee is combating an enemy twelve meters straight ahead of us, also with injuries."

Gaara nodded and began to go past me, but I stopped him.

"I have yet to forgive you, but perhaps Lee is kinder than I."

He hesitated then nodded, before heading off and I went around where their battle was, heading towards the other two scents I had just caught hold of. Neji and Chouji are both very hurt. I need to hurry. I grit my teeth against the pain in my legs and pumped chakra into them to push myself to the limit. Hurry, hurry, hurry. I reached Neji first and upon catching sight of his injury, I swallowed, quickly doing some hand signs and putting my new skills in first-aid to work. I managed to slow the bleeding, but this injury was far too much for me to handle, so I did my best, pulling out bandages and patching him up as good as I could before placing him on my back and hurrying to Chouji's scent.

Not good. I thought, feeling my chakra reserves getting far lower than I expected after trying to heal Neji, and I managed to reach back and pull out a soldier pill, chomping down on it and feeling slightly better. I located Chouji not far from a recently destroyed patch of forest and found him, not so much injured as completely chakra exhausted. His chakra levels are so low… not good. I did my best to siphon off some of my chakra into him and picked him up as well, before heading back to Konoha as quickly as possible. The forest was denser in this area, so I couldn't use Shoji, but I knew I could make it if I just pushed myself a bit further.

After a while, I began slowly taking chakra from my tattoo seal, using that to help me make it to the gates where I informed the men there to get the Hokage and bring her to the hospital to take care of the two I had. They hurried and did so as I pushed my legs to their limit and reached the hospital the same moment my legs gave out. The nurses quickly relieved me of the two genin I had carried and they went to treat me as well, but I shook my head and used some of my sealed chakra to 'poof' into the Hokage's office.

"Shi?"

I huffed, collapsing onto the ground exhausted, and managed to look up at Tsunade and Kakashi, who I hadn't expected to be there.

"S-Sorry for interrupting." I gasped out, leaning my head back against the wall behind me and pulling my scarf down to try and get some air into my lungs. "I-I brought them. Two critically injured. Hospital."

Kakashi immediately hurried to my side, Tsunade coming over as well, hands glowing green as she placed them on my legs.

"She okay?" Kakashi asked, looking me over for possible injuries.

Tsunade let out a long sigh. "She's over worked her legs and has minor chakra exhaustion. She'll be lucky if she can walk for the next 24 hours."

I let out a chuckle, surprising them both. "I-I can summon."

Tsunade rolled her eyes and Kakashi let out a short chuckle as well.

"That's great, Shi. Now come on. Let's get you home."

Kakashi lifted my arm over his shoulder, carrying me towards the door, only for Tsunade to call out to him.

"Your mission has already been decided, Kakashi!"

Kakashi waved on hand over his shoulder. "Eh, when I'm finished, I'll come back. There's no need to worry."

We left and Kakashi quickly poofed me to my apartment, helping me in and getting me situated before heading towards the door. This time though, I stopped him.

"Kakashi…"

"Yeah?"

"It's not your fault." I said, watching as he turned his head slightly towards me in the doorway before he turned back and closed the door quietly behind him. I hope he understands… Sasuke leaving isn't his fault… just as the Hokage's death isn't mine… I thought, quickly and easily drifting off into a deep sleep.

It rained that evening, both in actuality and in my nightmares. I dreamed of Sasuke killing Naruto and of Orochimaru laughing in the background, using me to kill Kakashi and destroy Konoha. I dreamt of pain and blood, of overwhelming darkness and the deep, heartfelt pain of abandonment. I dreamt of people crying, of myself crying, of death and scars, torture and grieving. But there was something else I dreamt of. I dreamt of God, standing there watching it all telling me it wasn't supposed to be like this. I dreamt of him painting a scene of two brothers and a big misunderstanding, a family who was torn apart by a demon fox, a son wishing so much to not be his father, and a man with a red eye wanting absolute peace in the world after watching his friend die by the hands of another friend.

It's not supposed to be like this… So much pain and sorrow… So much hurt…

God began to cry and I did as well, wishing there was something either of us could do about all this, but there wasn't. People were meant to die, to live, to be reborn or sent into another world. Without these things, the world wouldn't move on. Without those two brothers' misunderstanding, the younger wouldn't have met the boy from the family attacked by the fox. And without that fox, the boy wouldn't have become such a strong person. He wouldn't have effected so many people. The boy who didn't want to be his father wouldn't have understood just how important camaraderie is and he wouldn't have grown up the way he did, able to pass on that knowledge to the fox boy and the revengeful brother. And without the red eye man, the fox boy wouldn't have understood just how important peace would be and how ideas can become corrupted over time, trailing darkness over the hearts of different people.

Everything had a purpose. Every event, no matter how painful or heart wrenching, happened for a reason. But what is my purpose? Why was I brought here? God just smiled, tearfully, handing me the paintbrush and pushing me towards the easel.

"You are here to mark the hearts of people. To join them together and help them understand what their purpose is. You are…"

He said the last word, but I couldn't hear it. No sound came from his mouth, but what he said brought a smile to my face nonetheless and everything felt calm, peaceful even. This is how it's supposed to be… I thought, before waking up to see a blurry ceiling and sunlight shining through the window beside me, as tears continued to fall slowly down my face. And I smiled. A bright, grin that stretched across my face, causing me to laugh because, for once, I was genuinely happy. I knew what I was, why I was here, and what I planned to do now that I was.

"I am… a survivor."

The next few days passed in a blur of training and eagerness. I had bumped into Jiraiya who had told me Naruto and I would be doing one-on-one training with him for three years, which seemed a bit much, but I understood and was more than willing to do so. I had also trained a bit with Lee who was much better after his surgery, even surpassing Guy in his youthfulness on occasion. What's more, I was greeted and thanked by Choji and Neji as well as their sensei, Asuma and Guy. They had thanked me profusely for being the first on scene to bring back their students for medical treatment (at least, Guy did. Asuma was far calmer.) and it seemed someone has passed the word around about what I had done and I often got patted on the back by other jounin, thanking me. Kakashi found it amusing, however I found it as nothing little more than annoying.

He and I had actually been on really good terms since what had happened and, although he hadn't expressed himself as to what may be bothering him, I gave him my silent support and didn't push him on the issue. I knew he still blamed himself for what happened with Sasuke, my suspicions confirmed when I saw him at the gravestone talking to a dead comrade about what had happened, but I didn't disturb him other than occasionally going out of my way to drop by his house for dinner, claiming that I liked his food better than the take-out I normally get. He probably knew I was worried about him too, but he never said anything, so I assumed we had a mutual understanding. He wouldn't have to tell me and I wouldn't bring it up, but we both knew what was going on. It's too bad I'm leaving today.

I let out a long sigh, packing my things away in a scroll and stuffing that into a small pack on my back with a few other scrolls and necessities. Jiraiya said to meet him at the gates and he'd bring Naruto, so I was about ready to go, when I caught sight of a glint of light on my dresser. When I headed over, I couldn't help but smile at the paintbrush, and picked it up as well, heading out to drop by an art supply store before I went to the gates.

Once I had those things packed away in a scroll, I poofed up at the gates and waited calmly for Jiraiya and Naruto to arrive. I didn't have to wait long before they did show up and Jiraiya smirked as Naruto bounded up to me with a big grin on his face.

"Aren't you excited, Shi?! We get to go off and see the world and learn some super cool jutsus and stuff! I can't wait!"

I gave him a small smile and ruffled his hair before the three of us headed out, Naruto throwing a fist in the air with a loud shout.

"Yosha!"

I shook my head and rolled my eyes, looking up at the blue sky with a small smirk on my face. Three years, huh…