I'd like to thank you all once again for your comforting words and lovely reviews. I am truly blessed to have you by my side. You gave me strength when I needed it to go on with my writing, something I always loved to do. Thanks.

Well, here's another chapter. Quite long…but, I hope you don't mind. I'd love to hear what do you think.

Chapter 47

"I'll try to be back till supper", said Matthew, collecting some items he needed for the day.

"Don't worry about us, we'll be fine. You go on and make sure that he's okay", pausing for a bit, Atlantis gazed at him, caressing him with her hazelnut eyes "Both of you."

For a moment, Matthew just gazed back at her, lost for words. Than slowly leaning forward, he placed a gentle kiss upon her lips, taking in the sweet scent of roses that played in her hair "I love you", he whispered.

She smiled lovingly, feeling how his lips lingered a bit on her lips "I love you too."

"Kiss Matthew for me", he said, glancing at still asleep child, his hand already on the doorknob. Atlantis nodded and gave him one last smile to encourage him for today. She knew that he needed all the strength he can get and she wanted him to know that she will be with him during the day throughout their special bond that grew stronger with each beat of their hearts.

As the doors shut behind her husband, Atlantis took a deep breath in and for a moment, just stood there, thinking. Slowly picking her hair in a tail, she decided to get dressed and collect the eggs from chicken-coop.

xxxx

"Mr. Bray got some fine new material, we could check it out for Katie's new dress, Ma", Colleen said as she cut in her pie.

"Sounds good", nodded Michaela, sipping on her tea "She is growing like a grass, practically outgrew all the dresses she has."

"Can I have a purple dress?", Katie blinked behind her plate as she tried to feed her doll Sandy with some of the food.

Michaela smiled, placing a spoon of food back into Katie's plate "What did we say about feeding dolls, Katie?"

"Don't do it", she gave her Ma a toothless grin.

"Precisely", Michaela smiled, taking her cup again.

"But, can I still have a purple dress?", Katie pressed on causing whole family to smile at the obvious similarity between Mother and daughter. Never give up until you get an answer.

"Sure, I don't see why not", smiled Michael;a "Lets just see does Mr. Bray has purple material, okay?"

Satisfied with Mum's answer, Katie nodded and swaying her feet, she continued to eat her breakfast, but in the next second her eyes went wide opened and she smiled at seeing a person who just showed up at the doors "MATTHEW!", before anybody could stop her, she wriggled down from her chair and catapulted herself into the arms of her beloved big brother.

"Hey, Katie!", Matthew welcomed her with his arms wide opened and gave her a big hug. Looking at the table, he nodded "Good morning, everybody", as he sat down with Katie in his arms, Colleen got up to get a plate for him, but Matthew stopped her "Thanks, I already had breakfast with Atlantis."

"Is everything all right?", Michaela asked.

"Yeah, I actually came to see you, Brian", looking at his brother, he added "You got any plans for today?"

Brian looked at the rest of the family and shrugged "Not exactly. Why?"

"Good. That means you can spend some time with your brother", he added with a soft smile.

Confused, Brian nodded, murmuring "Sure."

"Can I come?", Katie pleaded, looking up at Matthew.

"Not today, Katie. But, I will make it up to you", he winked at her, kissing her soft cheek and a little girl smiled "Okay?"

"Okay", she replied.

"Good. Now, you go, finish your breakfast", he put Katie down on the floor and stood up "You ready, Brian?"

"You wanna go now?", asked Brian.

"Yeah, lets go. I got food and drinks with me, will wait for you outside till you get ready. Bye, everybody", before anybody could ask what was this all about, Matthew left the house. Nobody noticed an understanding smile that shortly played on Colleen's lips before she continued to eat her breakfast.

Slowly, Brian got up and taking his jacket, he said "See ya", as everybody waved and greeted him, he went outside, curious what was this all about.

Matthew waited for him with their horses ready to go. Seeing curious and confused expression on Brian's face, Matthew joked "Come on, little brother, I ain't gonna eat ya."

Smiling, Brian approached him and Matthew ruffled his hair just like he did when they were still kids. Mounting their horses, they sent them into a slow pace.

The day was perfect, sun warmed the ground and the tiny flowers from the grass happily greeted the warm sun tracks. Their little multi - coloured heads peeked out of the green carpet dancing on a soft breeze. In a distance, water was singing its harmonic tune mixing with the melodies that various birds delivered from their happy little souls as they greeted the sun who smiled at them from the light blue sky.

Brian looked around himself, wondering where was Matthew leading him. He trusted his brother completely, but was curious about this sudden day-trip. As they took horses toward the creek, Brian's anxiety and curiosity grew.

But, before he could utter a word, he heard Matthew's voice "Lets sit over there", he showed a shadowed spot close to creek and Brian swallowed hard, recognizing that damned place.

His hands shivered as he pulled on the reins before they reached the place "No", Brian muttered, feeling a lump growing in his throat.

With one look at his brother's face, Matthew could see that Brian remembered this place. His little brother was frozen on his saddle, all blood drained from his face.

Matthew slowly stopped his horse and gave a hand to Brian, his face calm.

Through a fog it all came back; he was sitting on the ground throwing small rocks in the water, Pup sniffing around the bushes behind him. Caught up in his thoughts, Brian didn't pay attention to him until he heard his small whine. Blood. Running home. Coming back and finding raccoon dead in the bush.

It happened here, right here, right in this very same spot where Matthew brought him.

His eyes widened in fear and anguish "Matthew, no. Not here", Brian mumbled, not recognizing his own voice.

Matthew's heart was breaking into small pieces at seeing Brian like this. He never wanted to see his little brother crying, but in order to achieve that, he had to put stop on this whole thing. He had to make sure that Brian knows that it wasn't his fault.

Getting down from his horse, Matthew approached Brian's horse Taffy and practically pulled down his little brother from it.

"Brian", he softly started "Brian, look at me", as his brother avoided his eyes, Matthew whispered "Brian…it wasn't your fault."

As those words left his mouth Brian's head quickly turned toward Matthew. For a second, time stood still. Matthew scolded himself again and again for not noticing this inner battle Brian had for years. If Atlantis didn't alert him about it, he wouldn't give it a second thought.

He knew that Brian was petrified right now and that he won't get anything out of him. He needed to talk, assure his little brother that he loves him and doesn't blame him for anything.

"I remember when Ma called Colleen and me to look at you for the first time. You were the smallest, most ugliest little thing I've ever seen in my life", Matthew tried to joke, to give Brian some space to breathe. He did produce a weak smile, few tears escaping his eyes as he gazed at Matthew. Seeing that, Matthew knew that he was on a good track "Since you managed to crawl in the back of Mr. Bray's shop, you attached yourself to my leg and wouldn't let go. Miss Olive used to say that since I was the man of the house now, you were looking up to me and that I should give you a good example. I remember Ma saying that for some time you didn't want to sleep if I wasn't around. One day I was working at Miss Olive's and storm came in, so I stayed at her place for the night. I found Ma and Colleen back home with dark circles under their eyes. Ma told me that you cried whole night. They carried you around, sang to you, tried to feed you, but nothing worked until Colleen came up with an idea to wrap you in one of my shirt. It was at the very break of the dawn and it worked, you finally shut up and fell asleep when you felt the scent of me around you", carefully, Matthew continued "Ingrid used to say that you will be a very good man when you grow up."

At the mention of Ingrid's name, Brian swallowed hard, his chin began to tremble.

"She loved you like you were her own brother. She wouldn't want you to go on and blame yourself because of what happened to her. And neither would I", he spoke slowly, giving it time to all sink in Brian's heart. Fighting his own tears, Matthew continued "I was never so scared in my life like when I saw you standing in front of Pup with a riffle! It was matter of seconds, I didn't dare to breathe as I walked toward you. Any sudden movement could be fatal, Pup could have easily attack you and I could have lost you too", the tears grew heavier and rolled down Matthew's cheeks.

"I shouldn't have bug you to go to fishing with me that day. I shouldn't have brought Pup here after you declined. I was so mad at you for no reason. Stupid kid", Brian mumbled, his voice barely audible from the sobs that shattered it.

"Brian, I broke my promise that day; I told you I will take you fishing, but I didn't. And it was an accident. And it wasn't your fault Pup got bitten."

"BUT IT WAS MY FAULT THAT HE BIT INGRID! IT WAS MY FAULT SHE DIED, MY FAULT ONLY!", Brian broke down completely and when he tried to turn around and run away, Matthew grabbed him and enveloped him in his arms, hugging him tightly. At first, Brian tried to free himself from Matthew's hold, but his brother held him with a strength of a lion. He will stop this today, he will destroy the chains of guilt that held his little brother in an iron grasp. He waited patiently until Brian's sobs turned into a small hiccups and than tried again "Ingrid decided on her own to give Pup some water. She could have said that it is far too dangerous and lead you out of there. But, she didn't. She decided to approach to Pup even after Sully warned us all not to do that. She just wanted to…"

"She just wanted to calm me down because I was nagging about it", Brian protested.

"Did you know that Pup will bit Ingrid?"

Matthew's question froze Brian. He looked up at his older brother, his role model ever since he could remember. Matthew's face was calm, not a track of blame towards him could be seen there.

"No, but…"

"Would you stop him if you could?", Matthew gently pressed.

"Of course!"

"Colleen said something that day that actually woke me up. When we found out that you went to search for Pup with a riffle, I was on the edge, saying that you're stupid kid who never listens and she snapped at me. She yelled at me that I'm not the only one who lost somebody. It was than when it finally dawned to me that you thought that I hated you and that you lost me", Matthew swallowed hard "I can't forgive myself for yelling like that at you at the wake."

"You were sad, that's why", Brian muttered, not looking away from his brother anymore.

Matthew shook his head "But, this…this is even worse. I didn't notice that you still blame yourself for Ingrid's death. It ate you for years. If Atlantis didn't tell me about your talk before our wedding... Why didn't you tell me something?", he silently asked.

"I don't know. I was afraid", Brian hesitantly asked.

Matthew creased his eyebrows "Of what?"

"Of loosing you", Brian furiously wiped his own tears "I couldn't stand a thought of that. After Ma died and when Ethan…", Brian couldn't stop now "You were always there. I couldn't loose you too", he finished silently.

"You'll never loose me, Brian. But, please, promise me that you will talk to me when something is troubling you. It wasn't your fault that Ingrid died. Please, understand that. It was an accident. Don't let me loose you because of that", Matthew's voice shivered with tears. As those words left his mouth, Brian hugged him, sobbing…But, it felt like a huge rock fell down from his heart. Brian felt like he could breathe again. And he whispered "You won't, Matthew. Ever."

xxxxxx

Colleen was closing in the chicken-coop when she heard horses approaching. Turning around, she saw her beloved brothers riding toward her and as she saw their faces, she smiled. She was the only one beside Atlantis who knew what Matthew planned for today, he told her about it the night before when they had some apple pie at Grace's café.

As they came toward her, she held their horses reins as the two of them went down from their saddles. She just looked at both of them, knowing without even a word that everything was alright now. Matthew and Brian both looked at her with love and Brian asked "Colleen, was I really an ugly baby?"

Collen looked at Brian surprised, but than caught Matthew's wink at her and trying hard not to laugh, she nodded saying "True horror. Wrinkled forehead, messy hair, clumsy little, ugly creature", as smile broke on her face, she added warmly "But, you were OUR clumsy, little, ugly creature", at those words, three siblings laughed and hugged tightly. Not letting go. Whatever obstacle life put on their road, they won over it. And they always will. Because they had each other forever. Because they loved each other. Because they were a family.