"That's it?" Matt said dejectedly, giving a pout in the general direction of Hysees. The two were sat in Matt's house, as their group always seemed to be, though sitting was not what either of them were doing. Matt had just finished showing Hysees one of the Insane Clown Posse's music videos, expecting some sort of reaction from the Juggalo, especially since she had no clue of their existence. But after the video, Hysees had just shrugged off the experience, going back to doing pull-ups in Matt's home gym, while Matt sat down with his guitar in hand. He wouldn't admit it, but he enjoyed just hanging out with Hysees like this, sneaking glances at her athletic body and biceps as she exercised.
Hysees grunted as she pulled herself above the bar, "Yep, sorry to disappoint ya' buddy."
Matt fondled an exercise ball as he spoke, "Well that kinda' sucks."
"Well what exactly did you expect? That I was gonna' freak out and start murdering bitches? Puh-lease, I ain't that angry."
Matt pushed the exercise ball across the room, causing it to lightly crash into a pyramid of weights. "You couldn't just humour me or something? Like, smash a few walls? Kick me in the stomach?"
Hysees pulled herself above the bar and kept herself there for a second, giving Matt a smirk. "Man, the way you're talking, it's like you got a fucking fetish or some shit like that for getting hurt."
Matt blushed, and turned away, attempting to hide the fact that he did kind of get pleasure from the attacks, though Matt usually chalked it up to spousal abuse rather than BDSM. Once he'd gotten himself under control, he went back to plucking the strings of his guitar, eventually tuning his guitar and playing a light melody on his acoustic guitar.
Soon enough, he heard the door slam open, and a familiar cockney voice rang through the room, "God damn it, where the hell issssss sssssshe?"
Matt pulled his attention to Carthus, whilst Hysees continued her routine. "Where's who, dude?" Matt asked.
Carthus examined the room frantically, his head darting back and forth. "Tarlia. Sssssshe'ssssss sssssstarting to masssssster her powerssssss, and sssssshe learned thissssss ability where sssssshe could-"
"CARTHUS!" Tarlia screamed directly behind Carthus, a few inches from his ears. She had seemedly appeared out of thin air, and Carthus fell to the ground in shock.
"Holy shit," Hysees exclaimed, dropping from the bar, "Tarlia, where the hell did you come from?"
Tarlia shook her fists in excitement, a wide smile on her face. "Guess!"
Hysees sighed, "Can't you just tell me?"
"Nooooope! You have to guess!"
Hysees slid her hand through her braidless, curly hair. "I don't know, did you telepo-"
"I teleported!" Tarlia interrupted.
Matt chuckled, "Wait, you can teleport? Is that a troll thing?"
"Nope! It's an Space thing! As long as I know the location of someone or something, I can just teleport to it, like-" Tarlia disappeared from behind Carthus, who was still lying on the ground, and reappeared in front of Matt. "POOF!"
As Tarlia excitedly explained, Matt took the time to notice her seemingly recently cerulean dyed hair. "Oh hey, when'd you dye your hair?"
Tarlia directed him a large smile. "Oh, so glad that you noticed. I'm glad someone did!"
"Get off my back, I'm not your human internet girlfriend." Carthus snapped.
Hysees chirped in from behind Tarlia. "Well, your powers are way more worthwhile than a worthless piece of shit rust bloods."
Carthus raised his upper torso off the ground. "Matt, tell Hysssssseessssss to go sssssscrew hersssssself."
"Why can't you tell her yourself?" Matt asked.
"Stop trying to pull my boyfriend into an auspistice quadrant, asshole!" Hysees barked.
"Matt, tell Hysssssseessssss that that issssss not what I'm doing."
"What the hell's an auspitice?" Matt kept questioning.
"It's another god damn quadrant," Hysees replied, "but in order for you to be an auspitice, you'd have to stop being my kismesis. And this douchebag fuckwit is trying to pull you out of a kismessitude."
Matt glared at Carthus. "Stop trying to break up me and my girlfriend."
Carthus muffled a loud groan with his hands, before waving his hands to end the conversation. "Whatever. It doessssssn't matter." He pulled himself up off the ground, straightened his cap, and turned to Tarlia. "Sssssso you coming or what?"
Tarlia's smile didn't flinch. "Nope! Sorry, still got stuff to do, powers to learn. You know how it is!"
Matt intervened between the two, "Wait, coming where? What's happening?"
Carthus took his cap off and ran his hand through his messy hair. "I need to go create our paradox clonessssss."
"Our what?" Matt raised an eyebrow at him.
"Paradox clonessssss. I'm creating ussssss, and ssssssending ussssss back in time sssssso we can exisssssst. And I'm not doing it if no one comessssss."
"But isn't Jaloon there?" Tarlia asked.
"He doessssssn't count. He'ssssss not exactly the funnesssssst persssssson to talk to."
Matt stifled a sigh, feeling bad for the fact that Jaloon had a crush on that guy. "Well you obviously do, brah." He then said matter of factly.
"Fuck you. Don't usssssse logic againsssssst me, or I sssssswear to God I will doom thissssss entire timeline by not creating ussssss."
"Don't think that's how it works, dude. And I would know." Matt placed his guitar against the couch, and got up, stretching his arms out. "But whatever, you want someone to come? I'll come. Seen enough versions of myself anyway."
"Have you sssssseen yoursssssself assssss a wriggler though?"
"As a what?"
"Oh, uh, what wassssss it humanssssss called themsssssselvessssss assssss ssssssmall verssssssionssssss of themsssssselvessssss?"
"I think they were called babies!" Tarlia chimed in.
"WAIT WHAT," Matt placed his hands over his mouth, "I get to see myself as a baby?! Well what are we waiting for?" Matt ran past Carthus, practically bounding outside of the room. "C'mon, let's go let's go let's go!" Matt's excitement was interrupted by a chime from his Portable Computer, and held up a finger at Carthus. "Hold up. Be a second."
Carthus through his hands into the air. "Alrighty then, not like Jaloon'ssssss waiting for ussssss or nothing."
Matt made a clicking sound with his mouth, as he made guns using his one of his hands, and answered the message in the other.
VisualizingExpectation (VE) began Pestering DailySpelunker (DS)
VE: Uh
VE: This might seem kind of sudden
VE: But I felt like I should let you know that I'm still alive
DS: ok…?
DS: good for you buddy
DS: whoever you are
DS: really just proud of you
VE: Oh!
VE: I forgot I changed my tag
VE: Matt, it's me. Tara
DS: uhh thats not a funny joke
VE: No, really, I swear!
VE: I know, it's been, what? Half a year?
VE: But I've had a lot of time to think
VE: About myself
VE: My beliefs
VE: All the things I've done in my life
DS: holy shit, it really is you
DS: only the real tara would drone on like that
DS: so you're over it
DS: can we meet up or what
VE: Not exactly, sorry
VE: But I just don't think I'm ready to do that!
DS: really
DS: c'mon T I miss ya
VE: Sorry Matt
VE: But I can't trust myself right now
VE: But I'm getting there, one step at a time
VE: I've had this sweet guy, who I guess is a troll but not one we've met, helping me
VE: I think his tag was NotoriousCaptain or something like that
DS: wait
DS: you've been talking to jaloon
VE: Oh, you know him?
DS: dude I've met all the trolls
VE: So they actually are trolls then?
DS: yep
DS: theres actually like 5 of them right now
DS: excluding the god tier dude
VE: Wow
VE: Okay, noted
VE: But Jaloon is the only one I've been talking directly to since then
VE: The guy's actually surprisingly good at being a psychiatrist
VE: Though, I got to ask
VE: How is Tarlia? Is she okay since my outburst? I mean, is she even still into me anymore? I wouldn't be surprised if she was dating you now
DS: oh god no
DS: dude she is way still into you
DS: she's even trying to break her bad habits just so she doesn't scare you off
VE: Wait, what habits?
VE: Like smoking? Drinking?
DS: necrophilia
VE: Oh
VE: Uhhh
VE: That's just…
VE: Wow
DS: eh, they're trolls
DS: weird culture
DS: you know I'm in
DS: like
DS: a hate relationship
DS: like I hate her
DS: but I'm also bangin her
VE: Okay
VE: One- gross
VE: Two- can we scale it back to the necrophilia
VE: That was a joke right?
DS: uh
VE: RIGHT?
DS: yea sure
DS: let's go with that
VE: Sigh
VE: Darn it, what have I turned into?
VE: I'm already thinking of her as my girlfriend
VE: I haven't even met her!
DS: dude
DS: you're turning into me
VE: Gosh, I hope not
VE: A fate worse than death
DS: screw you
DS: but please don't go again
DS: I miss ya T
VE: I'm sorry!
VE: But I don't feel ready
VE: I still got some heavy stuff to deal with
VE: I just felt like I should let you know I wasn't dead
DS: I guess
VE: Hey Matt
VE: I hope to meet your girlfriend when we do meet again, right?
DS: what are you my mom
DS: but
DS: sure
DS: I'd be happy to
VE: :)
VisualisingExpectation (VE) ceased Pestering DailySpelunker (DS)