A/N Another update! Let me know what you think.
The material of the blanket feels rough and irritating against my damp skin. I've laid in this bed for what feel like an eternity. I'm suffering. The pain is like nothing I'd ever experienced before in my life. It was like my blood is boiling inside of me. I've tried to call out several times. I tried to make them stop and take the pain away. None of them would listen to my pleas.
It's been a weeks since the mission in Thailand. When we were finally informed of doctor Pavlov's progress, the guards took us down to the lower level of the Facility. They injected us with the Serum they'd created from the Formula Nathan Mathis provided. In the first handful of hours, nothing happened. Everything was as normal until the next few hours ticked over. My body started to tingle and my mind clouded with a haze.
Not long after that, I began to experience the changes. Sweat poured from me to wet the sheets of my bed. My temperature started to rise. I became agitated at both the leather restraints I'd been placed in and the constant pain. From that point on they separated us into individual rooms to keep us as controlled as possible. The four walls are small and concrete, and the bed is the only piece of furniture inside the boxed room. I'm completely cut off from everyone but the doctor or nurse that would come to check on me every so often.
My teeth grinded against one another as a wave pf pain flushed through my body from the tips of my toes and up to the centre of my brain. The throb in my head pounded with a sharp ache. My eyes were squeezed shut when I felt a damp cloth placed on my forehead. A nurse wiped away the beads of sweat. I didn't hear her come in; that's how unfocused I am.
Giving a sharp tug on my restraints, a growl slipped from my lips and the nurse jumped back in fright. I just want them to stop touching me. I just want them all to go away. Everything hurts. Kicking my legs, I shook my head against the pillow as I struggled. The guards must have heard the ruckus I was making as they rushed in to see what was happening.
"What did you do?" questioned doctor Pavlov with an accusing tone.
"Nothing" she stumbled out "I was trying to help"
Pavlov shewed away the nurse with a glare before coming to the side of my bed. Opening my eyes, he checked my pupils with a shine of his pen light. I started to shake "Katya?"
I screamed as all my frustration bubbled to the surface like an erupting volcano. Pulling my right arm free from the leather restrain, I pushed the nearby guard with my hand. His body reeled back to collide into the wall with a sickening crack.
"Get me out" I demanded as more guards stepped into the room to secure me. I pulled my other arm free and sat up. My hands reached for Pavlov's throat. I squeezed as hard as I could and I watched as his face turned purple and blue "Let me go" I begged.
I can feel Pavlov kicking his feet, his hands clawing at mine to try and free himself from my death grip "Katya" he gurgled out. I didn't stop. I can't think straight. I only know that this man is the cause of my torment. A sharp prick stabbed me in the side of my neck and I dropped Pavlov's body before I started to see black creeping into the corners of my vision. Darkness consumed me within seconds.
"I hope your feeling much better doctor Pavlov" spoke Krupin as he sat in his office, checking the monitors that held several camera angles.
"Yes, much better" rasped Pavlov. In Katya's sudden burst of ferocity, she'd managed to bruise the doctors oesophagus "We've kept her sedated for the time being to prevent further incidents. But this does make me question her future in the program. If she survives the process, there's no telling if she'll co-operate. Her mental stability will begin to deteriorate. It may affect her ability to follow orders"
"If our own assets can't follower orders, than what good are they?" questioned Krupin "I believe a fresh start is in order. When Katya's able, I want you to start the conditioning process. It's a harsh treatment, but it's worked so far. How can you fight what you don't remember?"
Nodding in agreement, Pavlov wrote down a few notes on his clipboard "I'll see to it personally" there was a pause of silence "I must be the one to inform you that Tatia died not long ago. The effects proved too taxing. There was nothing we could do"
Krupin sucked on his teeth "Unfortunate news. From now on, take every precaution. I want a firm eye on the remaining girls" it's only a matter of time in Krupin's eyes. He was told from the very beginning that not all may survive, but so long as it isn't his favourite.
When I woke up, the light above me beamed brighter than I usual. I'd lost track of time after they'd put me under, but I can still remember the soft flesh under my hands as I squeezed Pavlov's throat. The moment replayed over and over again; a constant cycle in my brain. Shifting on the bed, the worst of the pain had faded away. All that's left now is a raw ache in my muscles and bones, like growing pains.
I can't move too far. They've still kept me restrained even though I haven't caused any trouble since that day with Pavlov. I suppose they don't trust me not to act out again, and in truth, I don't trust myself that much either. Since being injected with the Serum, nothings been the same. My thought aren't as clear as what they were. I feel paranoid, and I'm afraid of my new found strength. It's all so incredibly foreign to me; to not be in control of my own body.
I feel lost.
Turning my head to the side, I heard the metal door open "Good morning" greeted Pavlov. A couple of guards filed in after him and I watched as they unbuckled the leather cuffs and hauled me up onto my feet. I wobbled a little. Supporting under my arms, they walked me out of the room. It's the first time I've left. I don't know where I'm going.
"Where are you taking me?" I muttered out as Pavlov walked ahead of us.
"Were taking you for a test" he replied simply.
Continuing on down the hallway, we entered a room filled with electrical equipment and a treadmill. There's another small split room with a glass window. I can see monitors and computers inside. It's some sort of observation room "Stand" said one of the guards as I was placed on the treadmill.
Stepping hesitantly closer, Pavlov attached several leads to my temple and chest before shewing the guards and heading into the other room. He spoke into the microphone and his pitched voice made me wince as I looked down at the running belt of the treadmill "Can you here me?" he asked.
I nodded "Yes"
"Good. Now, I'm going to turn on this machine and I want you to start running. We'll start of slow and work our way from there. Understood?"
"Yes" the machine made a humming noise before the belt beneath my feet began to move back and I started into a slow jog. The speed began to increase and soon I was running at an incredible rate. My legs felt almost numb. It's as if they working all on their own. I'm barely breaking a sweat and I never felt the distinct ache in my calves even after an hour of running.
The machine started to slow down before grinding to a halt. Pavlov came out of his section room and began to unhook the leads from my body one after the other. My chest panted, but there was no burn in my lungs or exhaustion "How do you feel?" he asked.
"Fine"
Pavlov nodded his head before turning to rustle through a few draws. I stepped off the machine when I saw him uncapping a needle. Stepping toward me, I moved back "No" I said firmly. I'll run miles, but I'm not doing any more of those tests.
"It's necessary" Pavlov went to reach for me again when I knocked him over. Crashing into a nearby machine, he fell to the ground with a crash. His hair dishelmed and his glasses askew.
"No" I growled. The doctor leant up on his hands and knees; a flash of pure fear in his eyes.
Barging into the room, the guards took a hold of me with a rough grip. Letting them cart me out the door, the doctor called out "Wait!" Pavlov got up onto his feet "She's not going back to her room just yet – take her to conditioning"
The guards looked at each other before nodding their heads. Shoving me down the concrete hallway, we turned several corners and I became lost. I was too busy trying to figure out what the doctor had meant. Condition? I've never heard of it. Whatever it is, I don't plan on finding out. Suddenly stopping, I pulled my arms free and punched the closest guard and broke his knee cap. I turned to face the other one. He tried to hit me with a metal bat before I easily disarmed him. I reached forward and broke his neck with a quick snap.
Glancing this way and that, I saw doctor Pavlov standing a couple meters way. He has someone with him – the Soldier. I don't care. I'm not the same any more. I can beat him. Striding forward, the doctor coward back behind the Soldier and when I reached him, I threw a punch. A metal hand encased my closed fist just before impact.
He twisted and as much as I fought to gain the upper strength, I was failing. Kicking my leg out to hit him, he swiftly blocked my attack. We fought against each other, neither one of us winning nor losing. Putting me in a chock hold, I elbowed the Soldier in the stomach and head butt him in the face. He stumbled back and I kicked him in the chest.
My eyes caught site of Pavlov and I went to approach. I wanted to finish what I started. But before I could reach the trembling man, I was yanked back by my collar. The Soldier punched me in the kidney and I gasped for breathe as searing pain shot through me. Coughing, he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. I felt my bones grinding under the pressure.
"Don't kill her" commanded doctor Pavlov as he stepped forward. He adjusted his lab coat before nodding his head "Follow me Soldier, and make sure she doesn't escape"
The Soldier picked me up in his arms. My feet squirmed above the ground as he carried me a few doors and followed Pavlov into a glum room. It's bare apart from a large machine. Forcefully pushed me down into a black leather chair. The Soldier kept his hand at my throat until cold metal restraints clamped my body still.
The wiring of the machine I sat in became louder. My lungs panted for air as I looked to see Pavlov standing at a control console not a few steps from me "What are you doing?" I demanded, but he didn't reply.
The cold metal of a hand clutched my jaw with a bruising grip. The Soldier squeezed until my mouth opened. Shoving in a rubber bite guard, I bit down. Staring at me with his cold steel eyes, I took the brief chance to really look – I saw nothing. There's something not quite right. The Soldier moved out of the way to stand back near the doorway.
The machine started to hum and move. A head piece moved down to rest just around my head and under my legs eyes socket "Doctors orders" spoke Pavlov as he pressed at the console "Bite hard. This will be incredibly painful"
For the first time in a long time, I felt fear.
2016, Bucharest
The windows had been blocked with newspaper. A single mattress laid on the floor with a sleeping bag and pillow. The apartment is small and a little worse for wear, and filled with only the bare essentials. Glancing around, the scuffed wooden floor boards creaked beneath Steve's shoes as he walked over to the cramped kitchen.
According to Agent Thirteen, this is the place where Bucky's supposed to be located, but Steve didn't see anyone else in site. Noticing a brown diary sitting on top of the fridge, he picked it up to flip through a few marked pages. There's a picture of Steve in his Captain America uniform wedged in one of the pages. A slight, almost inaudible intake of breath made Steve turn around.
Bucky stood a meter away, silent and still as he stared. He's dressed in civilian clothes and a jumper to hide his metal arm. Steve was the first to speak "Do you know me?"
Bucky nodded slightly "You're Steve" he replied "I read about you in a Museum"
Steve took in the information. Falcon muttered a few words over the inter-com. He needed to hurry before they go here "I know you're nervous and you have plenty of reason to be, but you're lying" spoke Steve.
"I wasn't in Vienna" Bucky defended "I don't do that anymore"
"Well the people that think you did are coming here now, and there not planning on taking you alive" Steve needed to get the message across. The situation there in is dangerous.
"That's smart" Bucky nodded "Good strategy"
Steve sighed "Why did you come here, of all the places?"
Bucky stared. He wondered if he could trust him. Maybe, if what he read at the museum is true, he could "I'm looking for someone"
"Hydra?"
Bucky shook his head "No. Someone else" metal fingers flexed into a fist as he squeezed "Things have started to come back. I've started to remember. All the things I've done. All the people that I've hurt – killed" Bucky paused. Maybe he shouldn't tell the Captain too much "I need to keep looking. I have to try and fix it, somehow – even if it's only one person"