Previously...
"Alright, here goes." Elliot flashed her a nervous grin and took a deep breath, causing her to let out a light laugh. "Olivia Benson."
"Elliot Stabler." She mimicked, squeezing his hands.
"I love you, so much and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." He paused, his eyes looking straight into hers. "Will you marry me?"
Chapter Sixteen
Family
There was a moment of silence and Olivia could tell he was nervously waiting for her answer. She loved him more than life itself in this moment because, in his insecurity he was baring his soul to her and she could see everything from his loves to his needs to his wants and they were all for her. It cemented her answer even more in her mind.
"Of course." As the words left her mouth she saw his whole body immediately flood with relief and it made her laugh. "Did you honestly think there was a chance I could say no?"
"I'd be a fool not to." He answered with a smile leaning in to kiss her.
She kissed him back softly, savoring sweet slow caress with which he addressed her lips. When she pulled back he was smiling like an idiot and she was sure the grin on her face matched his. She tugged on his arm gently and he got the message, moving from his kneeling position to the spot beside her on the couch.
He pulled her close and took the open box off of her knee. She readily offered up her left hand and watched as he gently glided the ring down her finger. It was a perfect fit and as she gazed at the beautiful blue diamond she knew the ring wasn't the only thing that fit perfectly.
She looked up into his eyes that so resembled the diamond on her finger and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "It's perfect, El."
He smiled brightly at her, "Good, I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks so."
"Where did you find it?" She asked.
"I didn't have to." He answered and she looked at him quizzically. "It was my grandmother's. She had my mother save it until I found the right woman."
"Oh, wow." Olivia said, glancing back at the ring.
"Yep." He said with a smile. "She wanted my mom to keep it for me because she always thought my eyes were almost the exact same color as the diamond."
"I agree with her." She smiled, and they settled into a comfortable silence for a few minutes until something occurred to her. "Can I ask you something?"
"Yeah, what is it?" He replied, looking down at her.
"Why didn't you give this to Kathy?" She asked, the apprehension in her voice audible to both of them. "I mean, I'm definitely not the first serious relationship you've had with a woman. Shouldn't this have been hers?"
He was quiet for a while and when she almost couldn't take it anymore, he finally spoke. "Yes and no."
He took her left hand in his own and she leaned her head on his shoulder as she watched him study the ring. "I asked my mom for it when we found out Kathy was pregnant, but she wouldn't give it to me. She said we were getting married for all the wrong reasons and that even though I thought Kathy was 'the one', I was too young to understand what it really meant to be in love with someone."
"But you still got married?" Olivia asked when he didn't continue.
"Yeah." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "We were both scared kids, suddenly facing this huge responsibility and I guess we both thought getting married would make things easier. I love all of our kids and Kathy does too, but after everything that has happened this year, I think I finally agree with my mom."
He pulled away from her ever so slightly so he could look into her eyes. "I didn't know what it was like to really be in love with someone. I didn't know that being in love meant that every minute of every day of my life would be focused on making sure that everything I did was about making them happy. I had no clue that simply waking up in the morning to find myself laying beside the most amazing woman in the world would be the favorite part of my day for the rest of my life. I had no idea that with one look you would be able to take my breath away and make me love you even more."
By the time he had finished his impromptu speech she wasn't all that far away from bawling like a baby. "Is it your mission to make me cry as much as possible this Christmas or something?"
Elliot chuckled quietly and wiped away her tears with his thumb, "No, I'm sorry."
"Don't be, you were just telling the truth." Olivia said wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her robe. "It's just these damn hormones..."
"Are really annoying, but are also a good thing." He finished, giving her a small smile.
"Whatever you say." She said smiling back before she stood up and offered him her hand. "Come on, now it's time to see if I can make you cry."
"That doesn't sound like a very exciting invitation." He joked, but took her hand anyway.
She lead him back to the bedroom where she had been hiding his gift and pushed him towards the bed to wait while she dug for it in their closet. After half of her clothes and shoes littered the floor and several boxes had been stacked outside of the closet, she finally found it and turned around with a triumphant grin on her face.
Elliot looked like he was trying really hard not to laugh and she scowled at him, "What?"
"I didn't know you had gone to that much trouble hiding my present." He answered as she walked over to the bed.
She sat down beside him and placed the wrapped object in his lap. "I didn't want you to find it."
He gave her a brief smile and then wasted no time in ripping the carefully wrapped paper off of the gift to reveal a large, black, picture frame. The background was a collage of pictures, each from a various party or just hanging around at the squad and they all contained the couple both before and after they had become romantically involved. In the center was a larger, black and white picture of them that had been taken at Elliot's birthday. It was a candid shot, meaning neither of them had even known it had been taken, and Olivia had decided it was her favorite picture of them to date. They were walking away from the camera, hand in hand, seemingly without a care in the world. It was perfect.
Below the picture was a square of textured card stock and printed in big bold letters at the top was one word.
Partner.
Underneath that she had added the definition.
A person with whom one shares an intimate relationship : one member of a couple.
In the corner of the frame she had tucked a small hand written note and she smiled when he picked it up and began to read aloud.
"Partner. It's such a small word, but that's what you are. You are the other half of me. That one person who makes me feel like my arm is missing when he's gone. I couldn't do any of this without you and I would never want to. Thank you for being my partner and letting me be yours. Merry Christmas. I love you, Liv."
She looked up at him when he had finished and felt a little accomplished when there was a slight glistening in his eyes. "So?"
"I love it." He answered before kissing her softly. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." She said just before a loud yawn escaped her lips. "Can we go back to sleep now?"
He laughed and nodded, setting the picture on his bedside table. "Yes. Sorry for keeping you up so late."
"S'okay." She answered snuggling into him after he had laid back down. "Goodnight, Stabler."
"Goodnight...future Stabler." He whispered kissing the top of her head.
"I like the sound of that." She answered, falling asleep a few minutes later with a huge grin on her face.
"Nothing fits!" Elliot heard Olivia yell as he was coming out of the bathroom later that day.
She was standing in front of the full length mirror in the far corner of the room, next to the closet, poking her belly accusingly. Clothes were strewn on the floor around her and the part of her stomach she was poking was sticking out of a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.
"Just because we figured out you were in there doesn't mean you get to suddenly start acting like a baby." She addressed the bump, the frustration evident in her voice.
Elliot laughed lightly, coming to stand behind her so he could wrap his arms around her waist and put his hands on her stomach. "I'm actually pretty sure that is exactly what the baby is allowed to do."
She huffed, "Well, that's great for the baby and all but unless you know how to sew, I am going to your mother's like this."
He turned her around so her shoulder was resting against his chest, "I thought you had kept all those maternity clothes we bought in August?"
Her eyes widened happily and she immediately abandoned him to start digging in the back of their closet. She came out seconds later with the trash bag she had stored her clothes in and a huge smile on her face.
"Have I told you how much I love you recently?" She asked before kissing him happily on the mouth.
"Not in the last..." He looked at his watch. "Thirteen hours or so."
Olivia laughed, "Well, I really, really, reaaalllllyyy love you."
He kissed her forehead, "I love you too, Liv. I'm going to wait in the living room while you finish, okay?"
"Okay." Her voice was muffled as she had already started rummaging through the bag.
Elliot shook his head in amusement as he walked out into the living room. He sat down on the couch and closed his eyes, still remotely tired from last night's activities. Though his eyes were only closed for a few seconds before a thousand memories began to fly through his head without any real reason.
The first time they made love. How beautiful she looked, how loving and vulnerable. When he came over to find her looking so nervous and scared, believing that being pregnant was one of the worst possible things that could've happened. Another visit to her apartment that had been encouraged by his daughter and had finally made things turn out the way he wanted for once. The devastation of losing a child and how consuming the grief had felt initially, but they had conquered that too. Finally, her face the night before, when he had gotten down on one knee, between the couch and the coffee table and asked her to marry him.
When he felt like he had finally absorbed all the emotions, images, and thoughts that came with each memory, he opened his eyes and was glad to find it hadn't all been a dream. He sighed happily just as Olivia walked into the room and her presence alone was enough to make him grin ear to ear.
"What're you smiling at?" She asked, quirking an eyebrow at him.
Elliot stood up, taking in her appearance. Her brown locks hung in soft waves just above her shoulders and she was absolutely stunning in a long sleeved, blue, wrap-around dress that tied together just under her chest.
"My beautiful fiancé." He answered, pulling her towards him. "Am I not allowed to do that?"
"Of course you are allowed to." She smirked, kissing his cheek. "Ready?"
"Yep." He answered, following her over to the door so they could slip their coats on and head out into the blustery afternoon.
The ride out to Long Island was relatively quiet for the holiday weekend and they made it there with a little time to spare and decided to sit in the car for a while and relax before braving the storm that was his mother and children on Christmas.
"Do you think they'll like everything?" Olivia asked nervously, glancing back at the various gift bags and wrapped boxes in the backseat.
Elliot touched her shoulder so she looked back at him. "I'm sure they will. We picked out everything together and I think my lack of knowledge on present picking and your over abundance of it balanced out pretty well."
She looked at him skeptically. "Lack of knowledge, huh? It's not like you gave me am engagement ring for Christmas or anything."
"Just wait until next year, it's only downhill from here." He joked causing them both to laugh.
"And we'll have a baby; double the chance for you to mess it up." She said with a sarcastic smile.
"Speaking of, what do you want to do?" He asked jerking his head in the direction of the house.
"You mean, about telling them?" She questioned and he nodded. "I think...I think that we shouldn't say anything unless someone asks or figures it out. I know I'm already in the second trimester, but I'm still a little nervous. I don't want to get everyone's hopes up again."
Especially my own, was left off of the end of her sentence and they both knew it.
"Okay." He said, giving her a quick kiss. "Sounds like a good plan."
"I am known to have those every now and then." She said smiling at him in an attempt to diffuse the serious tone the conversation had just turned to.
"I guess we should probably go in." He sighed unbuckling.
Olivia laughed as they both stepped out of the car. "Don't sound so excited, you might give people the wrong idea Mr. Scrooge."
"I'm not a Scrooge...I just don't exactly share the same enthusiasm for Christmas as my mother and children do." He said opening the back door on his side. "The bags just have clothes in them right?"
She nodded, "Yep."
"That's all you get to carry then." He said, quickly scooping up the four wrapped presents before she could protest.
"Elliot." She said, a little too firm for his liking.
"What?" He asked innocently as she followed him up the sidewalk with the gift bags.
"I'm not an invalid, I can pick up a box every now and then." She said, and he could feel her scowl boring into the back of his head.
"Could you get the door bell?" He asked, conveniently sidestepping her comment.
She rolled her eyes at him, but did as requested. "I know I'm not supposed to be doing any heavy lifting, but I don't think a two pound Christmas present qualifies as heavy."
Elliot smiled as his mother appeared in the window of door just in time and quickly opened it for them. "Hey, Ma."
"Goodness you two brought a lot of stuff, come on in its freezing out there." She greeted, ushering them inside and directing them towards the Christmas tree.
After they had finished unloading the presents Elliot wrapped his arm around Olivia and smiled warmly at his mother. "Mom, this is Olivia. Olivia this is my Mom."
Olivia nervously stuck her hand out and Elliot stifled a laugh as the hand was ignored and his mother engulfed her in a hug. When they pulled back his mother kept hold of Olivia's elbows.
"It's great to finally meet you." Bernie smiled.
"You too." Olivia answered, a grin on her own face.
"Now I only have two rules in this house." Bernie began and the serious look on her face made Olivia nervous. "One, we never say no to more desert and two, you call me Bernie, none of that Mrs. Stabler stuff."
Olivia laughed, relieved that she wasn't really 'laying down the law' in a manner of speaking. "Those are definitely some rules I can follow."
"Good." Bernie, patted her elbow. "Elliot, why don't you go get the kids. I think they were hanging out in the tv room downstairs."
Elliot looked at Olivia with a question in his eyes and she gave him a slight nod, letting him know she was perfectly fine on her own. "Alright, I'll be right back."
"Take your time, it's Christmas, there's no hurry." Bernie called after him as he walked down the hall and turned into the last door on the left.
She turned to Olivia. "I've still got a few things to finish for dinner, wanna come keep me company in the kitchen?"
"Absolutely." Olivia smiled, following her down the hall into the kitchen, surprised at how quickly she had taken to Elliot's mother and vice versa.
Olivia took a seat at the small eat-in kitchen table by the wall, opposite the stove, and watched as Bernie began to roll out what she assumed was a pile of pie dough. She was starting to run through a list of topics she could start a conversation with, but didn't have to as Bernie spoke first.
"So, I see my son finally decided to propose." She commented, glancing briefly at Olivia.
"Oh, yes, just last night actually." Olivia answered, looking at the ring on her left hand. "Thank you, for giving him the ring, I mean."
Bernie laughed lightly, "Well thank you for saying yes, I know he was probably nervous you wouldn't."
"Yeah, he was."
They fell into a comfortable silence, the only sound in the room being the wooden rolling pin against the dough and the slap of the dough on the counter when she turned it over every so often. Olivia was hesitant to break the calm atmosphere of the room, but there was a question that had been nagging her ever since Elliot had proposed.
"Do you mind if I ask you something?" She said, trying to keep the nerves out of her voice.
Bernie sat down the rolling pin and wiped her flour-coated hands on a dish towel, "Of course, as long as I get a question in return." She answered with a smile.
Olivia nodded, gave her a small smile and took a deep breath, "Elliot told me he asked for his grandmother's ring when he wanted to propose to Kathy and you wouldn't give it to him. He said it was because you thought they were doing it for the wrong reasons and that he wasn't really in love with her. The only thing I don't understand is how could you give him the ring to propose to a woman you've never met, when you didn't give it to him when you'd already known Kathy."
"Ah, well." She crossed her arms and leaned against the counter, "First of all, I never really took to Kathy. One because she was stupid enough to let my son get her pregnant,"
Olivia laughed at that, causing Bernie to as well before she could continue. "Sorry, go on."
"Two, according to the kids, she never gave Elliot any credit for working a full time Police job to support their family and instead just complained about it the whole time." She finished, shaking her head. "Aside from not liking that it hurt Elliot, I'm rather glad that she filed for divorce."
"Now, as to why I gave him the ring without ever meeting you..." She paused, looking around momentarily before settling her gaze back on Olivia. "The way the kids, Maureen and Kathleen especially, talked about you and how much happier you had made my son, it was more than enough to know that you were someone very special. And not just to Elliot, but to them as well. And now that you're here in front of me, I'm even more sure I made the right decision."
Olivia gave her a teary-eyed smile, "Thank you. That means a lot."
"You're very welcome and now it's my turn for a question." She said, setting the circle of dough overtop an already assembled pie.
She stuck it in the oven and set the timer before walking over and setting down beside Olivia so they were facing each other. "Now, I am not asking this to sound rude or intrusive, but as soon as you walked in I noticed that motherly glow about you. Are you...?"
Olivia smiled warmly at her and answered her unfinished question. "Yes. We just found out the day before yesterday. We by no means were trying so it was a little overwhelming and definitely surprising."
Bernie patted her knee with a comforting touch only a mother could give. "Congratulations. I'm happy for the two of you and I know that you're probably nervous because of everything that happened, and I want you to know you can call me any time you just need someone talk to. Elliot can be great, but no once can give advice like a mother."
Olivia picked up Bernie's hand from her knee and squeezed it briefly. "Thank you, again."
"My pleasure." She said, with a small wink and a nod.
They both heard several pairs of feet suddenly bound up the stairs and turned their attention towards the doorway to the kitchen as first Dickie, then Lizzie, and then Kathleen and Maureen, and finally Elliot arrived in the kitchen. The kids looked pretty excited, if not wound up, and it surprised Olivia to see that even twenty-year old Maureen was practically bouncing with excitement.
"What's going on?" Olivia asked curiously, glancing at Elliot who simply shrugged.
"Oh, nothing, just that you're engaged to our Dad, that's all." Dickie said, earning a glare from all three sisters.
"Dickie." They hissed in unison.
"What? What did you have planned?" He retorted defensively.
Olivia let out a small chuckle, immediately(and accidentally) focusing everyone's attention back on her. She was instantly swarmed by the kids, receiving many congratulations and hugs, and though it was the slightest bit overwhelming she wouldn't have had it any other way. She finally felt like she was part of a family, like she belonged somewhere, and it was the best feeling in the world.
A/N: First of all I want to apologize for the late update. I was totally planning on updating last Saturday like I had mentioned in my author's note, however my iPad thought it would be fun to delete this whole entire chapter after I had finished it last Thursday. So after two days of felling VERY angry with my iPad and finding out if I wanted to get it back I had to restore the whole thing, I finally just sucked it up and started to try and piece things back together. I am sorry for the delay and to ensure that this never happens again I will only be entrusting my chapters to a pen and paper until I am ready to type everything up.
Alright, now that, that's out of the way... Thank you to all of you who still continue to read and review even with my crazy and irregular updating. I really appreciate it!
Thanks,
Katie