12

I sat on my hotel bed staring at my Pip-Boy. I have read the names of the holotapes about a hundred times. I play the first one named Better Days. A woman's voice plays.
"That batch of tests was inconclusive, but Madison and I are convinced it's a problem with the second filtration system. We're going to recalibrate the equipment and try again tomorrow so that... James, please, I'm trying to work. Now's not the time! ...So that's the next step. Assuming we get the results we need, we'll move on to… James!" she says. She laughs when she says my father's name and then I know that this was my mother. I sulk.
"Stop, I need to finish these notes!" she says with a laugh. "We'll move on to diagnosing the issues with the radiation dampeners that should... Owww! James!" she continues to laugh. "Now? We really shouldn't!" The tape ends.
Dogmeat howls. He might be laughing at me. My eyes go wide. For some reason the thought of my parents having sex and hearing my dad initiate it, grosses me out. I know that's normal. In the Vault, when two parents kiss it was hell for the kids. I bite my lip. I rather not have to sit through another tape that could possibly have sex sounds on it. Disgusting.
I leave the hotel room and head to Gary's Galley. The Muddy Rudder might have Tammy Hargrave sitting at the bar, and I rather not have to resist the urge of shooting someone. Today I wasn't in the best mood. Actually I was in the worst mood I have ever been in. And it didn't help when I saw James Hargrave walking down the hallway.
I make the mistake about looking at him. He glares and stops walking in the other direction. He isn't in the happiest mood either.
"What do you want?!" He yells. I cross my arms and raise a brow.
"You know now I know why you are such a brat." I say. I can see his eyes get darker. "Because your mom is such a bitch."
"What the hell did you say about my mom?!" he asks. He is literally shaking in anger. Fists are up ready to hit, and I think he is going to try and fight me.
"She doesn't give a shit about you all she can do is drink and hope you'll just go away." I say. He tightens his little fists.
"Oh, we'll see about that! I will show you! I know she cares about me!" He says and he runs away. I roll my eyes. What a fucking idiot.
After the incident with James I leave to go back into my room. Drinking doesn't sound as tasteful anymore, especially after talking about Tammy.
I sit down next to Dogmeat. I play another tape called Project Purity #1. I hear my father's voice and my fist turn into balls.
"We're back at work after a full week of delays. The Brotherhood Soldiers were able to repair the sentry guns, much to my relief. I know Madison isn't comfortable having them here, but there's no denying that we'd be lost without them. We're still waiting on the full analysis of the last three small-scale purification tests.

Catherine hasn't been feeling well, and it's slowing down our research. I don't mind, but I can tell it's bothering some of the others." The tape ends and my eyes become as big as the moon.
Did I hear a tape of my conception? Oh my god I am going to be sick…. I play another tape which is number 3. As the tape before it is dad who is talking.
"Well, there's no more mystery behind Catherine's health problems. The news of her pregnancy has lifted the spirits of everyone here, and given us a renewed interest in making the purifier work. We now have a future generation to provide for.
The latest tests show that our methods are horribly inefficient, but I think we're on the right track. Catherine refuses to rest; she insists on spending all day in the lab. I've never seen her more driven. She's determined to resolve the power problems before the baby is born. I've tried to reason with her, but it's no use." The tape concludes.
Hearing that my mother never stopped because she wanted me not having to wait for a better life makes my skin tense. She really loved me, even before she knew me. I play the fifth tape. Dad is again talking.
"The team has made plans to scale back our work once the baby is born. We're also trying to compensate for the increase in mutant attacks; no one is really talking about the implications of it. There are more of them than before. We know it, and the Brotherhood soldiers know it. Our relationship with the Brotherhood is straining.
They're concerned by the lack of concrete results from the project, especially in light of the mutant attacks. They haven't come out and said it, but we all know what's going on. They're questioning whether their involvement in the project is worth the trouble it's causing them. They lost two good men this week, with three more injured." The tape ends.
If only I was there. I play the seventh tape.
"I am at a loss. My beloved wife is gone. In her place is my daughter, small and helpless. As much as this place means to me... As much as it meant to Catherine, this is no place for an infant. Especially an infant without her mother." The tape ends. I take a deep breath.
I immediately play the eight tape.
"It's time to go. The project was in trouble before, both internally and externally. Progress has come to a halt, both because our re-calculations have gotten us nowhere, and because the mutant attacks occur several times a day. I regret it has come to this. I know that if I leave, our work may come to an end. Madison has never been on the best of terms with the Brotherhood; aside from Scribe Rothchild, she'll tolerate none of them. If she's the one dealing with them, who knows what will happen. It breaks my heart to go, but I must put the needs of my child before my own." The tape ends.
I play the tape that I found in my father's office in the Vault.
"Well, here we are. Nestled all safe and snug inside Vault 101. It's so cold down here. Colder still with Catherine gone... Oh, Catherine... I so wish you were here with me. How the hell am I supposed to do this by myself? Live down in this hole. Take care of our child... But this is our life now, so I guess I'd better get used to it. The Overseer who runs the place is an overbearing bully, but I've dealt with worse." The tape ends and that is the last tape I have.
I bite my lip. You did amazing, dad. You took care of me better than anyone else.
I cry. I don't even try to stop myself. That's when I think of James Hargrave. He doesn't deserve what I have said to him. I think of what Angela said to me before a few weeks earlier.
"He just needs someone who appreciates him, someone who understands him" Maybe that's all he really needed. Maybe that's all Butch really needed. I rise and try to go find James.