Chapter 11

He was taking simply forever and Rapunzel didn't like it. She didn't like him, either. Dr. Fredrics. She was sitting, waiting beside the window, taking in the sunlight and making that be sufficient when she wasn't allowed to let any air in. The way he had taken his jacket off and laid it aside had reminded her eerily of when he came in to preform a surgery. She shuddered at the thought of it. Of course with Eugene it happened more often than she cared to recall. the wort had been a hunting accident a few yesrs before. It had been a nightmare then, seeing Eugene's leg split open and not being allowed near him, seeing the doctor stall when he should have been sewing it up because theremay have been an arrowhead inside. There hadn't been. As if Eugene wouldn't have noticed something like that! As a result of that he had lost a ridiculous amount of blood before the wound was finally closed up and spent longer recovering because of infection. If that horrible little know-it-all had had his way Eugene would have completely lost his leg since Fredric's had wanted to cut it off instead of sewing it up. Rapunzel didn't know what kind of men he must have been used to, but they were nothing like her husband, whoever they were. Dr. Fredric's finally stepped off to the side and washed his hands before approaching her. Rapunzel slid from the window seat, crossing her arms and holding her chin high. The doctor knew that look well, though he rarely saw it on the princess. He sighed and shook his head.

"I've given him a sedative so perhaps he will rest better." He told her, crossing his own arms. Rapunzel nodded, but she wasn't satisfied. She knew that there had to be something else coming at her.

"And will it help?" Rapunzel asked stiffly.

"I- can not say." He answered, blowing his cheeks out. He looked nervous. "Princess."

"What?"

"It would be best for you to - prepare yourself." Rapunzel looked up at the balding little man with disdain.

"What are you saying?" She demanded before she could stop herself.

"Princess he can not hold on for much longer." The physician admitted, trying to sound as if he were completely within reason. "I can do only so much, Princess. There are funeral arrangements to be made, and for you to be prepared for such-"

"No. No, I will not! I will do no such thing!" She cried out. Hang dignified formality, this is Eugene he was talking about. She remembered what she had told her father, but when it came to it...when Dr. Fredrics actually told her that there was hope...it couldn't be. Never. Her face was blank, staring at the ground, trying to see past all of this. Rapunzel had expected to hear him say that. Those words that sounded like a curse. She knew they were coming since in the last week Eugene had only gotten worse. She felt as if the little man had whaled her chest with a frying pan.

"Princess, he has fought longer then most, but I fear your husband's strength is giving out. He can not last for much longer." Rapunzel was about to shout something put, but instead she closed her mouth tightly and shut her eyes. She didn't know how much longer she could take this. Eugene would come out of this, he would come back. He had to.

"He will." She answered, his voice trembling in a quiet rage of emotions. "Just wait and see."

There was another day come and gone, too fast and too slow. Watching her husband struggle for every breath was one of the worst things that she had gone through. If one of the children had been this ill she wouldn't have known what to do. She couldn't live without him. She knew that she couldn't.

"Rapunzel, stay - stay away from..."

"Eugene! Shhhhh. Shhhhhh. It's alright, it's alright." Rapunzel rushed to his side. "I'm right here." She gasped, her voice weary with sorrow. "Baby, there's nothing wrong."

"R-punzel!" he groaned.

"Mama?" Rapunzel heard a small voice behind her and turned sharply to see Matthew standing behind her, his nightgown half tucked into his breeches and his little face was screwed up with scared tears.

"Cap!" Rapunzel gasped, falling back to the familiar nickname. "What are you doing up here?!"

"Mama, I wanted to see daddy."

"Cap, you can't be in here!" She answered stepping away from Eugene and turning her son toward the door. She felt tears coming on and she didn't want Matthew seeing that either.

"Mama, what's wrong with dad?" He sobbed, disobediently turning and seeing Eugene's wild stare.

"Baby, you know that he's sick-"

"Mama, he's not saying my name."

"It's alright, Cap, he didn't see -"

"Mama, daddy's looking right at me!" He shrieked.

"Matthew, quiet!"

"He always says my name!"

"Matthew!"

"Mama, he didn't see me!" He screamed. His eyes were scared and confused. Rapunzel wrapped her arms around him and pulled his head into her chest as he kept crying.

"Shhh. Shhhh, Matthew, it's going to be alright. It's gonna be alright." She cried, kissing his head and holding him even closer. Eugene was groaning something again, and for the first time Rapunzel felt a twinge of annoyance at him for his delirium. He couldn't do anything about it, it wasn't as if he had chosen this, but in that moment she couldn't help it. Her baby boy was hurting and scared and sad - all because of Eugene! Then came the guilt in a fierce stab. How? How could she ever think of Eugene that way? Maybe if he had been neglecting his own children by going to the orphanage, but he hadn't been. A familiar hard lump came up in her throat and she started weeping with her five-year-old. He was far too young to lose his father! Just because neither her nor Eugene had grown up with a normal family didn't mean that their children didn't deserve to! Oh, she could just die of the pain. Would she? Would she just pine away, whither and die without him? Would she be stronger than that? She had the strange impression that Eugene did believe she was stronger then that, that she would all be alright, but Rapunzel didn't ever want to find out. Matthew's sobs kept on in a steady flow and Rapunzel felt her dress getting soaked. She didn't care. she kissed his hair again. "It's gonna be alright, baby." She crooned softly. Finally Matthew's sobbing died down to little hiccuping breaths that turned into snores. Rapunzel kissed his head and stood up slowly, walking to the living room.

"Conli?"

"Your highness?"

"Conli, could you put Matthew back for bed for me?"

"Yes, mam." He answered quickly, laying his spear aside and putting his arms out for the little boy. "But how - I didn't see him go in."

"No." Rapunzel sighed. "I think I have Estelle to thank for that. Just get him to bed, he'll be alright." She sighed, brushing Matthew's soft tousled hair. Conli nodded, adjusting the little boy in his arms and sneaking out down the hall. Rapunzel let out a moan when he was far enough away that he wouldn't hear her. She hoped that Matthew wouldn't remember that night, or that he would think that it was just a nightmare. "Oh Eugene!" She gasped, running a hand through his hair. "Eugene, I need you. Just come back. Come back to me."

The church was dark, reflecting the mood that everyone felt. Rapunzel was holding her youngest daughter close. She didn't want her running around and she didn't want to let her go.

"Mite wanna see dada." She hissed in a baby whisper.

"You can't, Estelle." She whispered back, tears burning in her eyes.

"Yup. Dada's sleeping in church."

"No, baby. No he isn't." Rapunzel sobbed softly. "Baby, daddy's not there. You can't see daddy any more. Sweetie, he's gone."

"But mama-" she insisted, pointing to the open casket.

"No!" Rapunzel heard herself insist harshly to the two year old. This was too much. She couldn't take it. Why hadn't her mother insisted on keeping the children with her today so she could grieve alone? "That's just - it used to be - once." She whispered, her eyes downcast as so many memories flooded into her head. So many many...just memories now. They were all that was left...

Rapunzel heard her own screaming sobs and woke herself up. It was dark everywhere, the candle had gone out and her face was wet. She must really have been screaming. She slipped off of the chair, basically falling onto the bed as she clambered to get to Eugene. He moaned quietly when she came close to him because she was shaking the bed back and forth as she went. Rapunzel didn't care. If he moaned, he was alive. If she woke him up and listened to his delirious ravings for the next five hours, she didn't care. He was alive, he was still alive, and he was hers. She was sobbing again by the time she came to him and scooped him up onto her lap. Eugene moaned again, gasping half of her name as she wrapped her arms around him and held him close. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the doors fly open and her mother race into the room.

"It's alright, mama. We're alright." She gasped. Her hands were clasping and unclasping in his hair, her face resting on his forehead. She was just looking forward, staring at nothing while Eugene moaned in her arms with his brow creased deeply. The queen sighed, sitting beside Rapunzel. As she touched her shoulder she wondered if her daughter would have preferred to be left alone for the moment. Rapunzel still didn't look at her. "It was just a dream." She whispered, more like she was reassuring herself than talking to her mother.

"Of what?" Her mother inquired softly as she moved her hand along her daughter's back as if she were still just a child. How bad could it really be?

"Eugene...of..of no Eugene. I was in the church." She whispered. Her mother could hear that her lip was trembling in the dark. "Oh mama! Eugene was gone!" Rapunzel wailed quietly. "Estelle just wanted to see her dada and she couldn't. She thought he was sleeping! Mama, she thought he was just sleeping! Its killing me, mama! He was gone. Mama, he was gone!" She sobbed. "I can't bring him back now."

"Rapunzel -"

"Maybe - maybe if Leora could," she continued, not pausing to hear what the uneven had to say. She wondered if Rapunzel was even listening to her. "but I can't do that to her. I don't want to use her, and Eugene would rather die than see that happen to her."

"See what-"

"I don't want him to die, mama. He can't! I-I can't watch him die again." Rapunzel sobbed. Her face turned down to Eugene, who she could barely see in the dark. "Mama, I want to see his eyes bright again - feel his breath on my neck, feel his arms around me to tell me everything's going to be alright even when it can never be the same. Mama, I want him so bad!" She blurted, her sentences all running together before her sobs took over once again. "And...and in the dream, I even shouted at Estelle, mama. I shouted at a two-year old because she wanted to see her daddy. I can't do this. Mama, he has to be alright...tell me he'll be alright!" The words left her lips almost as screams before she cut herself off, her sobs redoubling as she buried her face in his chest. The queen looked on, tears streaming down her face for both their sakes as she stroked her daughter's head and heaving shoulders comfortingly. She didn't tell Rapunzel that everything was going to be alright.

Queen Isabell crept into her daughter's suite early in the morning. Rapunzel had dozed off again. Very well, she was used to that. Any move that Eugene made woke her immediately anyway. She opened the drape just a little to let the light in and looked back at the couple. Eugene looked terrible. His skin just looked - thin. It made the queen shudder when she stepped closer. Even through the thick matte of hair that half covered his face she could see that he had worn himself out in the delirium. His was emaciated, his once thickly muscular arms had lost their bulk. He looked...looked-

"Mama?" Rapunzel yawned. "Mama, what are you doing in here?"

"I'm sorry, dear. I didn't mean to wake you." She whispered, stroking her mussed up hair.

"It's alright, Mama." She sighed wearily with her head still laying on the bed. Suddenly her eyes flashed open and she sat bolt upright, looking immediately for Eugene. He was still there. Rapunzel relaxed only a little after that, covering her face with her hands and leaning on her elbows.

"Has it been a long night? I mean, besides - you know." The queen asked patiently.

"Oh, mama! It was terrible." Rapunzel sobbed quietly. "Mama, Matthew came up here!"

"We'll, what of-"

"And Eugene was awake. He saw Matthew, and he didn't know him either!" Her voice was airy with emotion and she kept wringing her hands together. The queen's eyes widened.

"Is Matthew alright?"

"I - I think so. I guess I'm not sure. He fell asleep and I just put him to bed."

"Poor little dear." She whispered. "And then your - dream?"

"Yes. I...would rather not remember that." she whispered, though now that she had remembered it she couldn't make herself forget it. "Mama, could you watch the children today?" Rapunzel asked, not even looking up. She was staring at Eugene in the faint light that was creeping in through the open drape. Then suddenly her voice took on a note of vehemence. "I don't want the maids or anybody anywhere near my children today."

"Yes, Rapunzel. I'll keep an eye on them for you." Isabell whispered. "Rapunzel." The princess waited, but her mother didn't say anything. When she looked up she saw her head down and her hand to her forehead.

"What, mama?"

"I think I should call in Doctor Fredrics."

"Mama!" Rapunzel moaned. She didn't want him there. She didn't want to hear what he had to say.

"Dear, please?"

"It's not as if he can do anything." She grumbled, reaching forward at the same time to put a calming hand on her husband's chest when his lips started moving. "But if you wish, than send for him."