Chapter 6
Machines
6.40 a.m.
"What is this?"
The Computer saw a clearing in the forest and went towards it.
"Oh well, at least that's some form of civilisation."
The computer went into the 'hut' and found a trapdoor leading to the basement. Feeling curious, he ripped the trapdoor off its hinges (by mistake) and decended down a dirt staircase. In the middle of this basement was a variety of clunky machines. All were working but for one which was motionless in the corner. The Computer found it to be highly likely that there wasn't a socket to plug into anywhere.
He was just about to start up the stairs again when he heard voices. The first was the slightly squeaky voice of the old man. The second was that of Courage. None seemed to be hysterical or the least bit upset. What on earth were they doing together? Weren't they at loggerheads just a while ago?
6.41 a.m.
"Here is a the hut where I live in, and... WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON HERE?!"
The Computer went out through the hole in the floor and emerged to see a very irate old man. Courage had been conversing with the old man, but upon seeing the Computer, he turned to face him.
"Computer! Where were you?"
"Actually I was... "
"You! You again! You break my best spear, and now my trapdoor!"
"You see, I can explain... "
"Oh, I don't need you to explain!"
POW!
The Computer, caught off guard, was slammed with an unimaginable force by the old man's fist. He tubmled down the stairs and broke a majority of his screen. Shards of glass flew through the air while his casing nearly disintergrated.
"And you dog! Go join your friend!"
The ungrateful old man used his disproportionately large strength to toss Courage down the stairs. Courage was sure the old man had the same personality problem as the robber that had visited his family a long time ago.
The old man pushed a boulder over the trapdoor entrance right after.
Courage opened his bleary eyes to find the wrecked computer to be still mobile. The Computer was pulling and pushing levers, dismantling and re-assembling machines at a ridiculous speed. He dragged a unmoving machine and connected it to the all the rest. The Computer went over and pulled Courage to his feet.
"I am trying to build a primitive tank, so could you please help me out here?"
Courage looked uncomprehensingly at the Computer. The Computer just pointed to a hole in the contaption.
"Just take your crank and insert it there, but remove the metal parts."
Courage did as he was told.
"Now turn it as fast as you can!"
Courage put his best effort while the Computer kept setting and reseting columns of stone. The cilindrical stones at the bottom of the machine started moving. It made a laborious climb up the 'stairs', flattening them in the process.
6.57 a.m.
The old man was hacking away at a rock. He was trying to see if he could make a sword or some other lethal weapon with the stones he was going to get. Unfortunately for him, he mostly found fragmented stones. Finally, he decided to walk back to his camp.
He was greeted by the oddest invention on earth. A collosal contaption was chugging away, dismantling his camp wherever it went. It then faced him.
"Oh my!"
The machine was uphill, so it rolled down with an unimaginable speed down the slope towards him. The old man leapt aside, just a hair's breadth away from a bone-grinding death.
9.15 a.m.(Eqivalent time in Nowhere, Kansas)
Angry birds decided that humans were the cause of all their loss of habitat. The came down in great recruits from the skies above to reign terror on the people of Nowhere.
"We interrupt this programme to bring you a special report. Birds are now trying to peck our skulls open unless we accept their request to let them move into new apartment blocks with good furnishings! Owww!"
The Nowhere Newsman was being pecked by several birds onscreen.
Far away, the mayor of Nowhere was eating cereal when the news report was broadcast. His assistant, Floyd, was looking very concerened.
"Isn't this dangerous?"
"No. With the army and all, we will save ourselves from this impending crisis!"
Both men then entered their secret government emergency bunker.
At the military base in Nowhere, The General received a special message from the Mayor. The General addressed the Lieutenant.
"We have to do something!"
"What sir?"
"Hold this for me!"
The Lieutenant found himself to be holding a highly conductive siver rod. The General threw a switch that turned a tesla on.
9.17 a.m. (Eq. time NW Kansas)
The General took out a checklist. He ticked 'Took charge', 'Lost in Action' and 'Objective met' under the Lieutenant's profile.