his chapter is rated "M" for mature due to the short, opening scene.
Chapter 38: Shopping in Chi-Town
*******Friday*******
Friday morning, Veronica awoke to find Logan's arms wrapped around her. She turned in his arms and faced him. He was still asleep. Veronica debated on whether or not she should let him sleep. However, she knew if she left without telling him he'd be hurt. She put her hand to his cheek; he didn't stir. She planted a kiss on his lips. They stretched into a smile. His arms tightened around her indicating he was awake. She kissed him again. Suddenly, he moved onto his back taking her with him. His eyes opened, and he gazed at her with a sleepy smile.
"This is how I want to always awake—being covered by you."
Veronica laughed. "Not sure how that will work. Should I just climb on every night?" she asked.
"Works for me!" he exclaimed. "You can climb onto me anytime you want!" He kissed her and smacked his lips. "I'm addicted!"
Veronica giggled and sat up, her legs straddling him. "Well, we can start treating your addiction as soon as I get back," she said. When she felt him hardened beneath her, she gasped.
He smirked. "Why don't we start right now? I'll be quick!" he said. His hands reached and slipped inside her panties. When he felt her wetness, his grinned widened. "I see you're a bit addicted yourself."
She stretched her legs, so he could have better access. "It's a Pavlovian response," she said a bit breathlessly as he plunged his fingers inside her. He pumped in and out until she was dying to have him inside her. "Please, Logan. I need you!"
He pulled his hand out and ripped off her underwear. Then he pushed down his own until his erection was free to rub against her. She moved her body against him. He allowed her to create the friction she craved, causing his own body to get even harder. When she reached out and wrapped her hands around him, it was his turn to gasp.
"Okay, no point in dragging this out. You got places to be," he said with a wolfish grin. He put his hands around her waist and lifted her until she was directly over him. Then he eased inside her.
Much to his delight, Veronica reached down and pulled off her long t-shirt, exposing her breasts. Then she began moving, riding him the way she knew he loved. She kept her eyes locked on his. His hands reached out and began fondling her breasts.
"Faster!" he moaned, his eyes closing as she complied. He moved a hand down and began rubbing her clit, making her clench around in him response. It didn't take long for her to explode, causing her body to lock onto him. He gave in and finally released with a shout.
"God! I love you!" he exclaimed as he pulled her mouth to his, kissing her ruthlessly.
She pulled back, smiling at him. "Don't get in the habit of the two-minute foreplay," she admonished.
"Hey, you're the one with the busy schedule today. I was just being considerate," he insisted.
She moved off him with a snicker. "Since I'm feeling so good, I'll let that one slide," she said. She walked to the bathroom and turned on the shower. "Are you going to join me?"
Logan's eyes lit up at the invitation and he hopped out of bed.
******The Kanes*****
Parker arrived at Duncan's without her roommate. Mac had stayed the night with Dick, so she drove over with her car. Dick and Logan both were going to drop off their girlfriends, so Parker's would be the only car left at the Kanes'. For some reason, it was decided they meet at Duncan's instead of the airport. Parker hoped she wasn't the first one to arrive. She didn't think spending time alone with Duncan was a good idea.
She rang the doorbell. Lily's nanny answered the door.
"Who is it?" Lily called, obviously running to the door behind her.
Parker stepped inside, greeting the nanny and Lily.
"Hey, Parker! You came to see me!" Lily exclaimed excitedly.
Duncan appeared. "Actually, sweetie, she is here to meet Veronica and Mac. I'm taking them to the airport to use Grandpa's plane," Duncan said. He smiled at Parker.
"Hi," she said to Duncan.
"Where's you going?" Lily asked her.
"They're going to Chicago to visit Jazmin and to buy dresses for Veronica and Logan's wedding," Duncan said.
Predictably, Lily's eyes lit up. "Dress for me? I's the flower girl! I wanna go!" she insisted.
Duncan knew this would happen. He'd planned for it. "You can't, honey. Remember? You have your first play date with Sara today. And she's coming over here tomorrow," Duncan said.
Lily looked crestfallen. "But, Daddy, I gotta be bootiful for the wedding!" Lily said.
Parker laughed. "You are always beautiful, honey. I promise we will pick you out the best dress!" Parker assured her.
When she started to protest, Duncan gave her nanny a look. She reached for Lily's hand and said, "Come on, Lil. Time to get dressed for your date."
"We'll send your daddy some pictures of the best dresses, and you can tell Veronica which one you like the best, okay?" Parker suggested.
Lily smiled. "Okay!" she said. She hugged Parker's legs and then let her nanny lead her away.
"Would you like some coffee? We have some in the kitchen," Duncan suggested.
"I'd love some, thanks," Parker said. She followed him into the kitchen.
He stopped suddenly and turned back toward her. His abrupt pause had her inches from him. When she moved to step back, he reached out and grabbed her hand. "Is it really over? Should I give up on you and move on? Is that what you want?" he asked, his eyes imploring her to say no.
Parker was caught off guard but his words. "I want you to be happy," she said quietly.
He moved closer, pinning her against the kitchen counter. His hand pushed her hair back off her shoulder and rested on her cheek. "You make me happy," he said.
Parker closed her eyes a moment. Why was this so hard for her? She opened her eyes and faced him. "I am sorry, Duncan. I never meant to hurt you. I care for you, but you need to let me go," she said.
Duncan knew she was right, but he could see in her eyes that she was torn—a far cry from indifference. He had to know. He had to know if she had really done that. Had she let him go? Determined to find out, he pressed his lips against hers. Instead of pushing him away, her lips opened slightly allowing his tongue entrance. He kissed her like it was the last time he'd ever do so, wanting desperately to imprint himself on her in some way.
Parker was swept away by his kiss. Her mind froze, forgetting everything but the feel of his lips, the taste of him. In spite of her love for Piz, her arms went around his neck, returning the kiss with fervor. The kiss was hot and wet. It destroyed her. The ringing of the doorbell broke through the fog of lust and longing that had engulfed them.
When Duncan pulled back, he looked at her with regret. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to see if I'd imagined it. How good we were together," he said. He stepped away from her. "I'm going to do what you want. I'm going to move on. Attraction can't trump love. If you love Piz, then I hope you'll be happy."
He turned and walked away to greet the rest of his guests.
Parker felt like crying. How could she respond to him that way? Shouldn't her love for Piz keep her from such attraction? What was wrong with her?
A short time later, Duncan was in his limo with Veronica next to him. Parker and Mac were across from them. The girls were chatting excitedly. Daisy was driving down and meeting them at the San Diego airport.
He shouldn't have kissed Parker. He knew that. But he just had to know if she was indifferent to him. If she was truly committed to a life with Piz, she wouldn't have been able to kiss him like that. He stared silently at her while she pretended that he wasn't there. She said she wanted him to let her go. However, her kiss said everything but that. It was obvious to Duncan that she was conflicted in ways she didn't realize. He cared too much about her, though, to torment her with their attraction. So he'd do what she said. He'd let her go. At least he'd give the appearance of it. If that was really what she wanted, then she'd be happy. Either way, they'd both know where they stood. It wouldn't be the first time Duncan didn't get what he wanted.
******Chicago*******
"So have you ever been to Chicago?" Parker asked Daisy. They were in a car Jazmin's dad had waiting for them at O'Hare. She thought she should get to know her soon-to-be new roommate.
"Yes. I came one summer for their Blues Festival they have every year. Lots of free live music. I saw B.B. King," Daisy shared.
"Really? Piz would be so jealous," Parker said.
"There's so much to see here. Logan and I went down to the Navy Pier when we were here. It's the biggest tourist attraction. There's like a giant Ferris wheel like on the Santa Monica Pier and a stain-glassed museum. It was really cool," Veronica shared.
The car stopped in front of the Jalenos' Oak Park residence. They got out, and the door opened. Jason came down to greet them. Michael was behind him.
"Hey, ladies. How was your flight?" Jason asked. He reached out and grabbed a bag out of the trunk. Michael grabbed one in each hand.
"We didn't bring much. We can carry them," Mac said.
"Speak for yourself," Daisy said with a smirk.
"I guess most of these bags are yours," Jason said, smiling at her.
"Of course," she said without apology.
Veronica threw her arms around Daisy's shoulder. "You know our girl is high maintenance," Veronica said, teasing her.
"And unashamed of that fact," Daisy said airily.
Parker laughed. "Hey, I also brought more than Veronica and Mac. Those girls only brought one tiny bag," she said.
"It's all we needed for two nights and days," Veronica said as they walked up the stairs.
Sebastian came into the foyer to greet the girls. "We have rooms prepared for you upstairs," he told them.
"Are you sure you have enough room? We can stay at a hotel," Veronica said.
"Nonsense. My mother-in-law would never let me hear the end of it. Nor would Jazmin," he said. "We have two guests' rooms, and Jason has agreed to give up his room. Would one of you mind doubling up?"
"Not at all. Mac and I can share," Veronica said.
Jason led them upstairs to their rooms. Mac and Veronica were given the largest guest room since they were sharing. Parker was led across the hall. He saved Daisy for last. He led her to his room, feeling immense satisfaction at the thought of having her in his bed even if he wasn't going to join her there.
"So let me guess. I get your room?" Daisy asked with an arch of her eyebrow. He led her down the hall.
"Jazmin's room is across from it. My parents' room is downstairs, so you all will have lots of privacy. I'll be downstairs in the pullout couch in the library," Jason said, stepping into his room.
Daisy looked around his room with interest. She was unsurprised by the shelves full of trophies. Nor did the tidiness of it surprise her. The bookshelf full of books did surprise her. She knew he was highly intelligent, but she never saw him reading. His bed was covered with a black comforter. She pulled it back and put her hands on the black silk sheets underneath. "Nice," she said in approval.
"I've dreamt of you in that bed. I never thought the dream would come true," he said, smiling at her.
She turned and faced him. Giving him a coy look, she stepped up and put her hand on his chest. "You dreamed of me alone in your bed? I doubt that," she said knowingly.
He stepped closer and put his arm around her waist, pulling her against him. "No, in my dreams, we started like this," he said, bending his head and kissing her ruthlessly. He gave her no chance to do anything but accept his kiss. When he pulled back, her eyes were glassy. He pushed her backward until she fell onto his bed. Jason laid down next to her, looming over her.
Daisy stared up wide-eyed at him, unable to process what had happened. For some reason, she never expected him to make a move. At least not so soon or so effectively. "What do you think you're doing?" she finally spit out.
"Reminding you of how much you want me," he said with determination. He put his mouth to her throat, knowing it was a sensitive area.
The will to push him off her left her as he began kissing and sucking on her neck. Then his lips captured hers again.
Curious to see all the rooms, Mac stepped into Jason's room. Her mouth fell open in shock as she saw Jason on top of Daisy kissing her passionately. "Oh, God! I'm sorry!" she exclaimed. She turned to leave, slipping out the still open door.
Her interruption was enough to bring Daisy back to her senses. She pushed against Jason's chest, breaking off his kiss. "Stop! Mac just walked in," she said.
"So? She's seen two people kissing before," Jason said dismissively as he kissed her neck.
"We're not doing this," Daisy said breathlessly. God, why was it so hard to make him stop? She didn't want him kissing her. He had hurt her too much.
"Of course, we're not," he said easily. Then he captured her lips again. This time the kiss was so sweet and so gentle Daisy wanted to cry. The knowledge of how deeply he affected her gave her the resolve to finally slip away from him.
Jason turned on his side and looked at her, feeling good that she'd responded so well to him. "Are you sure you don't want to finish this?" he asked, grinning at her.
"No. I don't," she said firmly. She was disgusted with herself. She wasn't going to let him back in. Turning her back toward, she took a deep breath.
Jason got up. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. He got up and moved behind her. He put his arms around her waist, dropping a kiss on her neck.
She turned quickly and glared at him. "Stop doing that!" she exclaimed.
"I miss you. Why won't you forgive me? I love you. You said you loved me," he reminded her.
"Yeah, well, I say a lot of things," she said with a careless air, determined to not give him an opening.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jason asked, narrowing his eyes at her. "You don't love me anymore?"
"Why would I love a guy who is incapable of loving me back the way I deserve?" she said crossly, folding her arms across her chest.
"Just like that?" Jason asked in disbelief.
"I didn't come here to fight with you, Jason. Go away and leave me alone," she said coldly.
Jason shrugged, pretending like her words and attitude didn't cut him to the core. "Okay," he said. He turned and walked out.
Veronica stopped by a few minutes later. Mac had told her what she saw. She wasn't trying to be a voyeur, but she wanted to make sure Daisy was okay. She had seen Jason walk by their open bedroom door, so she knew Daisy was alone.
"Are you okay?" Veronica asked as she stepped in Daisy's room. Daisy was sitting on the bed staring into space.
Daisy blinked and looked at her. "I'm fine," she said.
"Mac told me you and Jason were having a moment," Veronica said.
"He found the appeal of me in his room too much to handle," Daisy said, rolling her eyes. She stood up. "Is it time for lunch? I'm hungry."
"If you need to talk, I'm here," Veronica offered.
"I know. I'm okay. Just a momentary lapse. I sent him packing," Daisy said.
"It's okay to forgive him, you know," Veronica said.
"I don't want to," Daisy said firmly.
"Okay, so lunch it is," she said, not wanting to ruin the day with bitter memories.
They went downstairs. "Jazmin will be here this afternoon," Jason told them. "My mom got us all tickets to see Wicked tonight. The seats are great."
"Really?" Veronica asked, her eyes lighting up. The rest of them were equally excited.
"She knows someone in the arts district. It's her thing," Jason said.
"We're hungry," Veronica said.
"I know a great Cuban cafe down the street," Jason suggested.
"I've never had Cuban food before," Parker said.
"It's yummy. You'll love it," Daisy said.
"Cuban it is," Jason said.
After they had their very tasty lunch, Jazmin arrived at the house. Her mother brought her in. "Jazmin, if you're not up to all the activity, I'm sure your friends will understand," her mom said.
"No, seeing them is the best medicine," Jazmin said, smiling at her friends. They took turns hugging her.
Daisy even smiled at her. "How are you doing?" she asked.
"Good. Much better. Thanks," Jazmin said. She glanced at her brother, who had neglected to mention Daisy was going to be there. Was it an oversight or were things still not good between them?
She never got a chance to speak alone to her brother. The girls talked wedding plans until it was time for the four o'clock performance of Wicked.
Their seats were about five rows from the front in the dead center. Jazmin and Jason had both seen it before. However, it was the kind of show you could watch more than once. Jason managed to sit next to Daisy. He watched her more than the performance. At half time when the show stopping song "Defying Gravity" was sung, he watched the pleasure and excitement on Daisy's face. He wanted desperately to inspire that expression on her face. The fact that she'd barely look at him since the kiss rankled him to no end.
As the lights came on for the first act intermission, Daisy ignored him and turned to Parker on her other side.
"That was incredible!" Daisy gushed.
"I still can't breathe! Live singing of that caliber is so much different than listening to it on a CD," Parker said.
"Are you liking it?" Jazmin asked Mac and Veronica.
"Are you kidding? It's amazing!" Veronica enthused. "I wish Logan was here!"
"Dick says he hates musicals, but I think he'd love this one!" Mac said.
"Of course, he would. There's flying monkeys!" Jazmin said, grinning. Mac laughed in agreement, knowing Dick would love the flying monkeys.
"Do you ladies want to go get a glass of wine or something? Intermission is a full half hour," Jason said.
Veronica followed her friends. She watched Jazmin talking intimately with Mac and felt relieved to see her doing so much better. The horror of losing Lilly would never completely fade, and she never wanted to lose another friend to violence.
*******The Next Day*******
The next morning was a perfect day for shopping. There wasn't any snow on the ground even though the temperature was much colder than the Californian girls were used to. Parker was the only one not fazed by the upper forty degrees temperature. She was used to cold winters since she was not a native Californian.
"I'm not sure I can deal well with this cold," Daisy complained as they stepped outside.
"Well, we could ask Jason to come along. He seems to get your temperature rising," Veronica teased.
"Not necessary," Daisy said with a glare. Mac and Veronica laughed.
"If it was summer, we could just stroll down Michigan Avenue," Jazmin said. When the girls look at her like she was insane, she laughed. "I know. I didn't think that would fly. Dad loaned us his driver for the day. I have a list of several shops I know have the dresses we'll be looking for."
"Great! Can we see something fun to start the day?" Veronica asked.
"That's the plan," Jazmin said as they climbed into the car.
Jazmin had decided to start the day at Millennium Park. The girls had fun taking pictures.
"Why is there a giant metal coffee bean on Michigan Avenue?" Parker asked.
"It's the coolest thing!" Mac said. "Dick would go nuts!"
"It had a much fancier name when it was first made, but everyone kept calling it the Bean because it does look like a coffee bean," Jazmin said. "I don't think that was the intention, though."
They watched the fountain spouts and the changing faces. "Wow!" Parker said. The giant brick walls faced each other. Various people would flash on the screen. Only one person at a time. Then the person would smile and out of their mouth would shoot water.
"In the summer, kids will stand under the waterspout and get some relief from the heat," Jazmin said.
"What's those lion statues?" Mac asked pointing northward.
"That's the front of the Art Institute," Jazmin said. "It's one of my favorite places in the world."
"So if we find the dresses today, maybe we can go check it out before we leave tomorrow?" Mac suggested.
"Sounds great to me!" Veronica said. "We went to the Fields Museum when we came here last summer. It was where Logan wanted to go. We spent an entire day there. There was too much to see."
"Yeah, it's a great place, too," Jazmin said.
They headed back to their car. The first dress shop they went to was a bust, so they went on to the next one. Veronica had decided that instead of picking colors she just wanted the girls to agree on one dress, and they'd each pick a different color. Getting them to agree on one dress was the problem. Daisy refused to commit to any dress until she'd seen all the options.
"Do you want some Chicago style pizza for lunch?" Jazmin asked.
"Absolutely!" Veronica exclaimed. "Giordano's?"
"Actually, I prefer a place on Ohio. Pizzeria Uno. Its sister restaurant is on Wabash if it's too crowded. The other one is called Pizzeria Deux," Jazmin said.
"We'll trust you," Mac said.
"Can we drive by the Christmas tree?" Parker asked.
"It's not as big as the one in New York City, but it's impressive. There's a German Village near it that's pretty amazing," Jazmin said.
"Why don't we take a break from dress shopping and go there after lunch for a bit?" Veronica suggested.
"It's your shopping day," Jazmin easily agreed. It was great spending normal times with her friends. The only thing that could make the day better was if Eli was here, too.
They each ordered a personal pan deep dish pizza. Mac couldn't believe they actually had broccoli as a topping option. For an appetizer, they ordered the Chi-Town Tasting Plate that had a little bit of everything: Buffalo Wings, Crispy Cheese Dippers, an Avocado Egg Roll, Chicken Thumbs® and fries. Mac loved the avocado egg rolls so much that she and Veronica flipped a coin to see who got the last one.
"You won't have room for your pizza!" Jazmin warned.
"Oh, I'll have room," Veronica said confidently.
"I've always wanted to try the famous, authentic Chicago pizza, so I don't care if I finish," Mac said, grinning.
When the pizzas arrived, they dug in with relish. No one could finish more than two of the four slices. Mac only managed one.
"I am never eating at Cho's again!" Parker exclaimed. "There's pizza and then there's pizza!"
"Cho's is okay," Jazmin said.
"You are really well-mannered," Veronica said, patting her hand. "Cho's isn't even close to this!"
"Well, once you get used to Chicago pizza, all other pizza tastes inferior except for New York City's," Jazmin said.
After the girls finished lunch, the driver drove them over to the Christmas area where the German Village was. They strolled around, impressed by it. Mac found the perfect Christmas gift for her parents. They ended up spending a full hour there looking and buying things.
When they made it back to the car with their purchases, Veronica groaned. "I found lots of great stuff, but we still have to find the perfect dresses!"
"We'll go to Nordstrom. They have a lot of choices," Jazmin said.
They split up and began browsing. Finally, Veronica found something she and Mac agreed was both lovely and appropriate for a beach wedding. It was a Donna Morgan strapless silk chiffon with a sweetheart bodice. The salesclerk assured them that any color they liked they would have the size.
"I think this one would be great on everyone," Veronica said.
"I like this purplish one," Mac said checking the sizes. "Grey ridge is what the tag says, but it looks purple to me."
"Me, too," Veronica said.
Parker came over and admired the dress. "Oh, this one is great. The light pink is my favorite," she said.
"Ladies, how about you all grab a different color you like in your size and try them on?" Veronica said, hoping they'd all like it.
Daisy was disappointed that it didn't come in red, but she grabbed the midnight black one. "A girl can never have enough black dresses," she said with satisfaction.
"I like both shades of blue. The amethyst color and the beach glass," Jazmin said.
"Try on them both, and we'll help you decide," Veronica suggested.
Since Mac and Daisy were going with darker colors, they decided that Jazmin should go with the sea glass blue. Parker's dress was a lighter color. Veronica thought they were perfect, so she snapped pictures to send to her mom and Alicia.
They all agreed that the dress was the perfect choice. It fell a few inches above the knee with a pleated skirt. The dress did a lot to accent their bosoms. Daisy flashed Veronica a wicked grin. She was the most endowed in that department.
"Jason's going to have a heart attack if she sees you in that dress!" Mac said.
"I think you may need to get it altered a bit. I don't want you looking like a porn star, spilling out of it," Veronica said with a snicker.
"My mom can alter it," Daisy said confidently. Black was a good color on. With her dark coloring, it made her look sultry and mysterious.
"So can we all just agree that this one is it? I'm sick of looking at dresses," Mac said.
"Yeah, me, too. I've got my dress," Veronica said with satisfaction. "I still need to pick out Lily's dress, though."
While her friends were changing, she went over to the toddler section. They had a lot of adorable choices. The ballerina dress she knew Lily would love, but she didn't think it'd fit the beach setting.
Veronica snapped pictures of two flower girl dresses she liked the most. One was an ivory satin tank dress with a splash of color around the waist. It had a belt that tied around the waist in various colors. Then the second was a sleeveless empire dress with a flower on the waist that she knew Lily would like. She thought the lavender would be nice in the second style. She sent the pictures to Duncan. Then she called him to find out which one Lily liked best.
Duncan called her. "She won't pick. She says she has to try them on and see how she looks," he said with a sigh. His darling diva was such a girl!
"So I'll just get both in her size. She can wear the other to church or something. Or save it for the next wedding," Veronica said, grinning at Mac who was standing next to her.
"That's fine. I'll pay you back," Duncan said.
"You let us use your plane. I think we still owe you. Don't worry about it," she said.
"So are you guys having fun?" he asked.
"A lot," she said. They said goodbye, and she hung up her phone.
"So are we done?" Jazmin asked.
"Are you okay? I know this is more activity than you've had in a while," Veronica said.
"I'm okay, but I am wiped. We have my parents Christmas party to get through tonight. If we get home by four, we can rest a bit before it starts," Jazmin said.
The girls agreed to their purchases and had the dresses put in garment bags, so they wouldn't get wrinkled or smashed.
*******The Christmas Party******
Jazmin was not in the mood to deal with her parents' friends, but she knew she had to put in an appearance. Next week would be her last week at the clinic. Learning to cope with stress was a big part of her recovery. She was pinning her hair up when there was a knock on her door.
"Come in," she said, expecting it was one of her friends. However, it was Joseph. He closed the bedroom door behind him.
"What are you doing in my room?" she asked warily.
"Hey, you asked me to do you a favor. I thought that meant you'd forgiven me," Joseph said.
"I am working on it, Joseph. But I have a lot on my plate to work through these days," she said.
Joseph hated to see the lack of fight in her. "I don't like seeing you defeated," he said.
"I'm not defeated. It's just been a long day of shopping. I'm pretty wiped," she said. "I'm doing much better."
"Good," he said, flashing her a genuine smile. It'd been such a long time since she seen it that she was startled for a minute.
"You're smiling at me," she said in bemusement. "I'd forgotten what that was like."
"I'd smile more if you'd stop hating me," he said sincerely. "I relive that day all the time in my dreams. Except sometimes I'm sober, and I don't hit you. Sometimes, you don't fall down the stairs. Sometimes, it ends in our baby in my arms."
Jazmin had the same dreams for a long time. However, she knew it wasn't healthy to dwell on what could've been. "There's no point in torturing ourselves with the past or what could've happened. You made your choice. I had to live with the consequences."
"We both did," he reminded her. "I could let go if you'd forgive me."
Hating anyone wasn't really in her nature. As Jazmin gazed at his pleading face, she realized that her heart had only room to hate one person at a time. Right now, all her hatred was reserved for David. She didn't seem to have any left for Joseph. "Okay. I don't have the energy to keep hating you anyway," she said.
He grinned and stepped forward to hug her. Then he kissed both her cheeks. For the first time in a long time, she didn't feel the urge to vomit at his touch. She supposed that was an improvement.
Joseph knew not to push her, though, and quickly stepped away and gave her space. He reached inside his jacket and pulled out something in a small paper bag. "I got what you wanted," he said soberly.
Jazmin's eyes widened as he pulled out a very small handgun. "It's a baby Glock-a G26. It's small enough to fit in your purse. It has ten rounds and is extremely accurate. It's a common back-up weapon for officers," he said. He showed her the safety. "I want to take you to a firing range in Indiana, so you can practice shooting, and we can go over how to take it apart and clean it."
"How long of a drive?" she asked.
"Less than two. Can you get an afternoon pass this week?" he asked.
"I'm only there five more nights. I'm going back tomorrow, but I check out Friday for good. I'll go twice a week for counseling until I move back to Neptune for classes," Jazmin said. "I can get a pass for Wednesday. It's the best day."
"Okay. That'll work. I think you should tell your brother, though. He'd understand," he advised.
"No. I can't risk him taking it from me. He feels it's his job to protect me. But I need this. I need to feel safe. He broke into my own home and hurt me, Joseph. You can't know what that's like. You can't know what it's like to feel so victimized, to hate yourself so much you can't look at yourself in the mirror most days," Jazmin said, her eyes filled with pain at the memory. Turning, she put the small gun in her nightstand drawer.
Seeing her pain made Joseph angry. He was going to have to go to Texas and find this guy. He didn't have to let anyone know. But the guy who did this to her didn't deserve to live. In a moment of weakness, he could never take back, Joseph had hurt her—the only woman he'd ever loved. Nothing could change what he did. He knew she'd never feel the same way about him. But her and her brother had been his family his entire life. Losing them both had been awful. He'd do anything to make it up to her. If he could get rid of the man who'd raped and hurt her, maybe it'd somehow make up for what he did. Or at least let her know how much he really wanted her forgiveness.
"Okay, I won't say anything," Joseph said quietly. "I'll see you downstairs. You may want to tell your dad you don't hate the sight of me anymore. He's been cold since your boyfriend attacked me when I was in Neptune."
The memory of that made her smile, but she wished Eli was there.
Veronica was coming out of her bedroom and glanced up in time to see Joseph coming out of Jazmin's room. She blinked at the unexpected sight. Concerned for Jazmin, she walked to her room. The door was slightly a jar. She pushed it open. "Hey. Are you okay?" she asked.
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" Jazmin asked.
"I saw Joseph coming out of here and thought he might be harassing you," Veronica said.
"No, he wasn't. He was apologizing again, begging me to forgive him. Dad's been angry with him since they both were in Neptune," Jazmin said.
"I don't think you need to worry about him now. You have enough on your plate," Veronica said.
"Very true. That's why I've decided to forgive him. It's too much work holding on to my hatred for him. I don't have the energy to spare," Jazmin said.
"I can understand that," Veronica said.
Jazmin felt guilty for hiding the full truth from Veronica. She'd vowed not to lie to her friends again. She knew Veronica may be the only one that understood her desire to feel safe again.
"Can I tell you something and you promise not to tell a soul? Not Logan or Mac or my brother. No one," Jazmin said. She didn't want to lie anymore to Veronica.
Veronica could see she was completely serious and nodded. "I promise. I can keep a secret. It used to be a hobby of mine," she said, smiling.
Jazmin went to her nightstand and picked up the small gun. "Joseph was getting this for me. You can't have these legally in Chicago," she said.
Veronica's eyes widened at the sight of the gun. Her dad carried one, so she was more comfortable around them than most. However, the sight of it in Jazmin's hand was startling. "Do you know how to use that?" she asked.
"No. Joseph's going to teach me. I need this, Veronica. I need to feel safe," Jazmin said.
"I can get you a Taser. You can carry that in your purse," she said.
"Until I know David isn't coming back to Hearst or he's in jail, I need this," Jazmin said firmly.
Veronica nodded. She did understand. She couldn't blame Jazmin. However, she couldn't help but worry that having the gun would end badly.
"Promise me you won't accidentally shoot yourself or feel like ending your life again," Veronica said pointedly.
"I swear the thought never crossed my mind! I have no intention in using this gun on myself or anyone unless I feel my life is in danger," Jazmin promised.
"Okay. Your secret's safe with me. But don't carry that thing around until you feel confident in how to use it," Veronica cautioned. She watched Jazmin put it back in her nightstand. She said a silent prayer that her friend would never need to use it.
******Chapter End******
All the Chicago stuff described in this chapter is accurate to the best of my memory. It's a great city to visit. The pizza ruined me for any others. I don't miss the weather, but I do miss the food.