A/N: *peeks out from behind laptop* Heeeey… I really meant to have this up sooner. Life decided to hit me hard in the last two months, and it's been hard to find any time or motivation to write. I'm starting to get back into it, though!

This chapter is based on the refrain of Kenny Chesney's song I Lost It. The rest of the song doesn't really fit with what I wanted to have happen, but if you give it a listen it may hint to what may happen in the next couple chapters ;)

Maya trudged her way down the hallway as she struggled to keep her eyes open. To say she was happy to get away from her world for a bit and crash at Riley's was an understatement. While she enjoyed being an artist in residence, it was a lot of work. Working with other artists in the area was great, but every single artist she worked with, including her host, pushed her to her limits, and not always in regards to her talent. However, Maya knew it was to help enhance and hone in her gift – that much was evident by the amount of paint she had smudged on her white tee shirt and jeans right now, but at the moment, she didn't care.

Ready to collapse from exhaustion at any moment, Maya unlocked the apartment door and tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge. After raising a confused eyebrow, Maya tried to push in on the door again. Still, the door would move ever so slightly before going back into its original position. What in the world… is there something blocking the door? she thought as she ran her hand through her hair. "Riley?" she called out, hoping her best friend would hear her. "Riles, is there something blocking the door?" Maya asked as she pushed on the door one more time – this attempt proving somewhat fruitful.

The door opened about a foot before it refused to budge again. Maya stuck her head through the door and saw Riley curled up in a ball on the floor, quietly sobbing into her hands. Quickly, Maya squeezed through the door and pulled Riley into her arms, allowing her best friend to sob into her shoulder. "What's the matter, honey?" she asked. "Who did this to you?"

After a few moments, Riley was able to suppress the sobs enough to allow her to answer. "M-Me, Maya. I-I did this. I-It's all m-my f-fault," she choked.

Concern laced Maya's features. "Riley, what are you saying? You aren't making any sense. What happened today?"

However, Riley wasn't able to respond. Her sobs racked her body as her lower lip trembled. Instead of trying to get her to talk, Maya stood her up, lead her over to the couch, and headed over to the kitchenette to make her some hot chocolate. It didn't matter how warm it was outside – hot chocolate was one of the few things that would help Riley feel better.

Once it was warming, Maya eyed her best friend. The sobs dissipated to tears gradually streaming down her cheeks, but Riley was just starting off into space – as if one of the worst things imaginable had happened.

After it was ready, Maya grabbed Riley's favorite purple cat mug and brought it to her. When Riley took it, Maya probed her again, "So, what happened today."

Riley let out a sigh after she took a sip of her hot chocolate. "I ran into Lucas," she replied as she stared at her mug.

Maya nodded her head. "Okay…" she trailed. While she knew those two hadn't spoken in years, she couldn't imagine what took place to warrant this kind of reaction. "Did he hurt you in any way? Did he say something?"

Riley merely shook her head as she continued to drink her cocoa.

"Riles, you're going to have to tell me more. Unlike what most people think, I'm not a mind reader. In those instances, I'm just good at getting information."

Again, Riley sighed as she placed her mug on the coffee table. "All day, there was something in my heart telling me to reach out to him. I don't know why, but every time I went to send him a text or call him, something in my mind would say, 'What if he doesn't want to talk to you?' I mean, after what happened that night freshman year I wouldn't really blame him… I could see the pain in his eyes after the words fell from my mouth, and I haven't exactly reached out to apologize. Anyway… the battle between my head and heart continued to when I boarded the subway. And, well, you know clumsy me. I wasn't paying attention and the subway stopped abruptly and sent me flying backwards – right into Lucas' lap."

Maya's eyes widened in surprise. "Again?!"

Riley groaned. "Yes, again! For the first time in over three years we actually talked to each other, and it was so nice," she continued, wringing her hands. "It was as if no time had passed between us, and we picked up right where we left off after a couple of awkward moments, but who doesn't have those, honestly?"

"Did you get a chance to explain yourself from that night?" Maya asked. She knew how much Riley regretted that night.

She shook her head. "Didn't get a chance to. I mentioned meeting up at some point to talk and catch up, to which he agreed. But before anything else could be said… his girlfriend appeared," Riley finished, trying not to break down in tears again.

Maya sat there and blinked at Riley. "His… his girlfriend?" she asked. Maya had to admit, ever since Riley and Lucas broke up, they weren't as close as they once were. It wasn't intentional; unfortunately, time has a tendency of pulling friends apart without any reason behind it.

"Yeah… his girlfriend," Riley echoed.

"How is this your fault, Riles?"

Riley couldn't help but shake her head. "Don't you see, Maya?! If I hadn't pushed him away that day, none of this would have happened! I was the fool that broke our bond, despite not wanting to lose it in the first place! Instead of breaking things off right then and there, I should have told him my fears and hoped that we could get through them together, and leave us parting ways for a time if it was absolutely needed, but I didn't. And after all this time, I still love him! No one could ever replace what we had. Whenever I was with him, everything was right. I could see us getting married and raising a family. No one could make me laugh, smile, drive me mad, or make me cry like he does. It's like he's a curse that's also the cure. All I know is that I love him, and I don't know what to do. I lost him, Maya… I lost him," she finished as more tears streamed down her face.

Maya pulled Riley into her arms and quietly soothed her as Riley's tears soaked through her shirt. "I don't know what to say, Riles. I wish I could say that everything will work out in the end, but it's so cliché. Life isn't always fair. Sometimes it takes away things we think we want or need."

"It makes me feel ridiculous for hoping…" Riley muffled voice replied, sending a sharp pain through Maya's heart.

"Riles, don't say that. I know what your hope is – to have a love so strong that it rivals your parents'. You're going to find that; however, it may not be with Lucas."

Riley sat up as she wiped her tears away. "But I feel like I blew my chance for that kind of love, Maya. How on earth am I going to find something even remotely similar to what we had?"

Maya shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know… one thing that hasn't changed is that I don't have all the answers. It'll happen, though. You'll see." After a few moments, Maya changed the subject, "So, how about I go pick us up a pizza, and then we can watch a movie. Try and help get our minds off of what happened."

"Sure," Riley replied, faking a smile that was clearly forced, especially to Maya.

"Alright," Maya said as she stood up. "You stay here, I'll be back in a bit."

After getting a silent nod from her best friend, Maya headed out the door and towards the pizza shop. While heading down the sidewalk, her mind tuned out the world around her and focused back on Riley. Needless to say, she was worried. Maya had never seen Riley like this before, and she wasn't sure what to do to help.

Not really paying attention to where she was going, Maya's shoulder knocked into something, nearly throwing her off balance. "Hey!" she barked out of instinct. "Watch where you're –" she started, but stopped mid-sentence when she realized who collided into her. "Lucas?" she breathed, not able to believe what she was seeing. Her friend was standing right in front of her, but she had never seen him in this state before. His shoulders were slumped and dark circles had formed under his lack luster eyes. What the heck happened to him? He looks terrible! Maya thought.

"Hey Maya," Lucas muttered. "Sorry about that… I'll see you later."

As Lucas walked away, Maya remained standing where she was, confusion lacing her features. Why is he like that? Part of her had half a mind to call out to him and ask what was wrong, but he disappeared amongst the crowd before she had the chance to decide if it was a good idea or not.

A moment later, Maya turned back on her heel and headed into the pizza parlor. After ordering a large pizza, she chewed on her lip as she pondered whether or not to tell Riley what she saw. Maya shook her head as she grabbed the pizza and grabbed a couple of drinks. She had no idea why Lucas was like that, so what would be the point in telling Riley? It could do more harm than good. But Maya had a feeling she would find out what was wrong with him – despite not having a long conversation with him in years.