What Shizuo's seeing can only be described as so ridiculously unnecessary that it either has to be fiction… Or Izaya. Unfortunately, it's Izaya. As he looks up at the burning warehouse with it's heat lighting his cheeks with a bright orange glow and reflecting in his eyes his next move is clear. This isn't a fantasy where the villains have master plans and the heroes are praised after tearing the city to pieces, this is real life and damn it Izaya, whatever's going on there is no way you had to light a building on fire you fucking nutcase!

There's no turning away from this. He has to go to wherever the hell Izaya decided to go to and knock some sense into him. He's going to meet Izaya on the level Shizuo is certain he escalated this to and drag him back down to Earth where he belongs. The real world where his sisters need him because his parents chose their careers over their own children. The real world where Shizuo's going to sneak him onto the roof to have lunch with his friends. The real world where Izaya's going to bring his sister's over to Shizuo's house where his mother can fawn over them and they'll have dinner as a family. The real world where he's going to spoil the ending of every mystery novel Shizuo picks up within the first fifteen pages for the rest of their lives.

If Izaya wants to be crazy, fine. Shizuo will show him crazy. He'll play Izaya's way tonight. But then he's coming home and they're going to tell his sisters all about the bad guys they beat. Mairu and Kururi are going to talk endlessly about their cupcake crime scene or whatever game they've gotten lost in and they're going to chase each other around the house until the girls crash from their sugar high. Then he's going to take Izaya upstairs and they're going to snuggle, awkward boners be damned because they're teenage boys and that just happens sometimes and it's okay. It's all going to be okay.

He just has to go into this burning building and catch a super villain first. Preferably before the police show up.

Vigilantes always have secret identities, right?

"Fuck…" Shizuo sighs shakes, his head, and starts jogging the rest of the way to the warehouse.

When he gets there what he sees is not nearly as bad as he was picturing. The doors are wide open, there are no pillars covered in fire with people trapped under them. In fact, it's almost empty and the fire is dying fast on the concrete with little to burn.

He slows as he approaches the front doors wondering where all the people are. Kadota said this gang was a big deal, right? Surely they'd be here to fight the person who set their clubhouse on fire? He looks inside to scan the room for any life. Maybe he's wrong. Maybe Izaya's not here and this fire is just an acciden-

Izaya's in the middle of the room… wielding a knife and wearing a skirt.

The next thing he sees is four boys, all younger but much larger than Izaya closing in. Three of them are carrying pipes and one is carrying a sledgehammer and Shizuo doesn't give a shit if Izaya set this building on fire because he's not going to let a single one of them touch Izaya. No one's allowed to beat some sense into Shizuo's villain except for him!

The boy with the sledgehammer swings at Izaya, shouting something Shizuo can't hear around the blood and fire in his ears. The entire world slows while Shizuo sprints towards the fight, but he isn't fast enough. He's not going to get there in time!

But Izaya doesn't need him there. Izaya ducks under the swing and goes on the offensive as fast as a cobra strike and suddenly the world is moving again and the blood isn't roaring in his ears quite so loud. Now he can hear something.

"He-Heiwajima! Oh fuck, wh-what are you doing here?!" The boy with the short pipe squeaks, revealing his real age. They're just kids. They're all just kids, what the fuck is all this?

"I'm here to take that crazy son of a bitch home." Shizuo snarls.

The boy holding the longer pipe whirls around, his eyes wide with terror and it looks like he's going to bolt. Only he doesn't. He charges Shizuo with a cracking battle-cry and swings over his head. This is nothing like the time Shizuo was hit in the head with the bat, he could see this clumsy attack coming from a mile away. It's easy to catch the pipe and thoughtless when he crushes it in his grip and before the kid can let go Shizuo's tossing him across the room. But Shizuo doesn't have time for this. He needs to get to Izaya now. He turns to the guy with the short pipe, expecting to push through him quickly to get to Izaya.

But what Shizuo sees makes his blood run cold. The guy with the short pipe is on Izaya before Shizuo can round the couch, yanking him off the guy with the sledgehammer. Izaya kicks and slashes wildly with his knife as he's pulled away from whatever he was doing to the sledgehammer guy but can't throw him off.

"You-you're here for him, right?" The guy squeaks, holding Izaya in a clumsy headlock while the guy who was using the sledgehammer gets off the ground and takes the knife from Izaya's hand. But not without getting a nasty gash on his hand. Izaya's like a cornered cat and they're ripping off his claws in front of Shizuo's eyes. "You can h-have him! Just let us go!"

His attempt at taking control of the situation is undermined by the panic in his eyes and the malice in his friend's. Whoever's gotten the bad end of Izaya's knife doesn't seem bothered by the cuts across his arms or the beast he's facing down.

"Sh-Shizu-chan!" Izaya cries, his voice pitching up in shock.

"No, he can't." This boy says, turning the blade towards Izaya with a disturbing amount of ease. It shouldn't be this easy to point a knife at another human being. They're just kids.

… Why can't they all just be kids?

"Not until I'm done with him." He grabs Izaya's face, his furious, beautiful face, and presses that damn knife to Izaya's cheek and Shizuo would feel a hell of a lot better if he would get thing away from Izaya already. "You a fag, Heiwajima? Or did this tranny screw you over too?" The boy grins, all mania and none of the reason Izaya possesses. "Maybe it's both, hm? Found out he was screwing with our boy Akihito? Not that it matters to me. You can have him in a few minutes. I'd let you join in, but this is a Blue Squares issue and I'd rather you didn't get too close. You understand."

Shizuo doesn't know what to say. Izaya's fate is dependent on his next move. What can he possibly do or say to get that knife away from Izaya's face? Can he possibly move fast enough to knock it away? Maybe he could-

"Five minutes."

Izaya suddenly speaks up, his eyes locked onto the boy with his knife. He sounds calm now. His eyes were so wide with panic when he was looking at Shizuo as if he was the one threatening Izaya.

"The police are almost here to take the last of the Blue Squares into custody. You don't have enough time to torture me and escape."

The boy holding Izaya looks to the boy with the knife nervously.

"Izumii…"

Shizuo has no idea if Izaya's bluffing or not, and he doesn't know which option he'd prefer. He's still standing on edge with his weight tipped forward, ready to cross the few feet between them and grab Izaya. All he needs is a moment of hesitation from that crazy Izumii kid.

But Izumii doesn't relent. Doesn't even spare a glance for his anxious friend. He drags the tip of the blade down Izaya's face and neck… and carves a slow, vertical cut down Izaya's left collar bone through the sweater like a tally mark. Izaya gasps and hisses in pain, trying to jerk back against the boy holding him to get away.

"That's one lie. Let's make a cut for all the ones I can think of…"

The knife moves again, down Izaya's body towards his skirt and Shizuo can't look away. But Izaya hasn't stopped talking even as the knife moves downward.

"Juvie might not be the same as prison, but that smear on your record will keep you from becoming anything more than a loser thug," Izaya says, obviously to the boy holding him who can be intimidated. "You think the system is against you now? Just wait. Crime is all fun and games when no one knows it's you."

Yeah no shit, Izaya.

Shizuo almost looses control and dashes forward as that knife starts to tip the bottom of the skirt up. But he holds himself steady. He has to trust Izaya knows what he's doing and isn't feeling as desperate as Shizuo is.

"You think your boys are on your side? You saw how they ran. And Izumii cares more about petty revenge than even entertaining the possibility I'm telling the truth and trying to save what's left of your little family."

This finally snaps the boy's resolve. All within the span of a second, he loses focus and that's just what Izaya and Shizuo have been waiting for.

"Izumii!" He cries, looking to his friend desperately for some sort of assurance that Izaya is wrong or lying. Izumii glances up just for a second to yell at his friend.

Izaya acts faster than Shizuo. He kicks the knife away, hissing as it accidentally scratches up his body. By the time it's pinging across the room and Izumii's rearing back to punch Izaya in the face Shizuo's on top of him and Izaya's stomping on the foot of the guy who's hold on him is failing.

Shizuo's easily wrenched Izumii's hands behind his back and is almost completely unaware of how he thrashes and kicks out his legs to escape because his eyes are still fixed on Izaya. Izaya whirls around to elbow the guy he's struggling against in the side of the head before he's able to spring away. He takes one more shot at his staggered opponent, a kick that only glances the side of his abdomen before he turns and sprints away. For a brief moment Shizuo thinks he's running away and almost drops Izumii to follow him, but then he realizes Izaya isn't going to the door. He's going for his knife.

Izumii's still thrashing and kicking and screaming every piece of profanity there is and Shizuo can feel that he's strong, but he's not Shizuo strong. The boy who had held Izaya doesn't seem to know what to do. He hesitates and Izumii starts screaming at him to grab Izaya.

"Get that FUCKING TRANNY!"

Shizuo is at a loss for what to do himself. This is his chance. He needs to drop Izumii, grab Izaya, and run. But… what is Izaya planning?

Izaya grabs his knife from the concrete floor without breaking his stride and grabs his knife before turning back when he gasps in pain and stumbles. He keeps running but now Shizuo can see him limping and that's enough for Shizuo.

Fuck it.

He throws Izumii at his friend. Their bodies collide painfully audibly but Shizuo doesn't see it because he's scooping Izaya up into his arms and heading for the door.

"Shizu-chan!" Izaya chokes in surprise as the wind is knocked out of him when he's thrown over Shizuo's left shoulder. "Shizu-chan, wait! Turn around I need-!"

"No! Shut up Izaya, I'm not taking you back into that!"

Izaya starts pounding on Shizuo's back with his fist.

"I don't want to fight I just- My wing!"

Shizuo was not expecting those words in this moment. They make him pause.

"I wasn't lying about the cops, they're coming. I don't want them to find it!"

Shizuo glances back and with a quick scan of the area he does, in fact, see a black lump of hair on the floor. What the fuck…

"Vigilantes need secret identities, right?" Izaya whispers quickly into the back of Shizuo's ear, digging his fingers into Shizuo's shoulder the keep himself upright. His words manage to cut through the other boys' yelling. Izumii is reaching for his hammer and Shizuo doesn't really get what's happening but…

"Fine." They need to make this quick.

Shizuo runs back towards the other boys and instead of going straight for the wig he makes a quick detour for the hammer that's about three steps away. He kicks it just to get it away from Izumii and keep away some of the danger, sending it straight into the warehouse wall, and then goes for the wig. Izumii jumps back in surprise, and Shizuo is just about to shift gears for the wig when Izaya surprises them all by tipping himself down over Shizuo's back and Shizuo almost trips in an effort to stop his momentum, thinking Izaya's falling.

But Izaya's not falling, he's going for Izumii. He grabs Izumii's face and arm, digging his fingers into the cuts.

"You're no king, monster, or god. You're not special. Remember how easily you fell when you thought you were on top." His eyes are wide and crazed and before Shizuo even has time to take in Izumii's livid face because he's lunging for the wig and running.

But as he turns to the door the sound of sirens cut through the night and the flash of lights of police cruisers round the corner. Everyone freezes in panic but Izaya.

"Shizu-chan, upstairs!"

Shizuo had no idea that there was an upstairs. He certainly has no idea why they would want to go upstairs. But he trusts that Izaya knows why so he turns on his heel and heads for the back of the warehouse.

He takes the steps two at a time and bursts into the top room. It's small and messy and Shizuo doesn't see a place to hide but-

"The window!"

Just what Shizuo was thinking.

Without a moment's hesitation, Shizuo runs for the window, loosening his grip just enough to allow Izaya to shift on his back so his arms are wrapped around Shizuo's shoulders and his legs are around his waist. He takes the wig from Shizuo's hand and speaks directly into his ear.

"There's another building that's straight ahead. Grab it and climb to the roof."

Shizuo thinks that maybe he should be scared or at least nervous. He's never jumped out of a window before and right now it's not just his body that's at stake. But Izaya's clinging to his back tightly. His grip is strong and his voice is stronger. Shizuo can feel the energy radiating from Izaya's chest and right now Izaya's not the shy bookworm who hides from the world.

There isn't any doubt in Shizuo's mind that they can do this.