Today is the official foundation day of micronation known as Uzupis. It is on April 1st, so today would be Marijus's birthday. Gah! I have so many OC submissions for Hetalia Modern Day. That will keep me busy. I got bored in the middle of nowhere and decided to reread my old stories. i look back and i think: ... THIS IS SH*T! Honestly, early in Defiance and in some parts of my Halloween special are soooooooooooo schmalzig! I want to create a DeviantArt account and rewrite everything! I'll make it in less chapters too if i knew what i was doing. Just tweek it a little bit. I really wish i could draw. I am slowly learning. I hate drawing hands! HANDS! I don't draw hands, i eat hands. I do not own Hetalia.

~Kolko

10 months after Belarus returned home.

The two were coming home with lunch. In the car ride, Poland was bored. He decided to snoop around the car. He gasped.

"Lithuania! You bastard!" Poland gasped. He looked like he was about to cry.

"What did I do now?" he asked. Poland held up a pack of cigarettes. "Those aren't mine!" he said quickly. A little too quickly.

"Nice try," said Poland, "Liet, you promised you were going to quit after Bel came back. And now you like, knocked her up again and this has to like, stop! You promised me! You promised!"

"I know I promised! I'm sorry! I only started again two years ago," he said, "besides, it's not like you don't have any bad habits." He put the pack in his coat pocket.

"Don't play that game with me Liet! You promised!" Poland said, "And Bel is going to like totally kill you you know how she is with that kind of stuff! She will have you decapitated!"

Lithuania sighed.

"I know. I'll try harder," they went inside the house, "just please don't tell Belarus."

"Tell me about what?" said a voice. The two froze. Belarus looked rather angry. She glared at Poland.

"What?"

"I found your stash of porn upstairs under sink!" she said.

"How do you know it's mine?"

"It was in big pink box that said 'Poland' on it! And there's ponies in almost everyone of these magazines. It's full of Hetalia yaoi too!"

"What?! Let me see that!" Lithuania got the box on the stairs. He looked through it. He then gasped. "WHAT?! RusLiet?! REALLY?!" Poland blushed. "What if Marijus found it?!" Lithuania scolded. She then smacked him in the head. "Ow!"

"Speaking of which, I found YOUR stash of porn at Poland's house!" she scolded.

"I swear I haven't looked at that since we've been going out!" She rolled her eyes. "And once when you were having Marijus." She crossed her arms. "And while you were gone. But I swear that's it!"

"You also forgot to clear your history on Internet!"

"That is NOT me!" he swore. Poland blushed.

"Eww! I thought you were gay!" she said.

"Who said I was gay?" Poland said.

"You are pervert! Normal people don't look at porn on the Internet!" she said.

"Oh?" he said, "You have like, NO idea! Do normal people include: Germany, Japan, America, England, France, Russia, Australia, Cuba, Denmark, Estonia, Greece, Korea, Prussia, your precious husband, and Netherlands?! And that's just to name a few!" She was bright red.

"… That's… just… gross…" she said., "Wait, Russia?!" He nodded. Poland had now mentally scarred her. He smiled at his success. "You can keep this trash at your house. I am very mad at you," she said.

"Mad at ME?! You have like, no idea!" Poland said, "Liet is-"

"Okay, that's enough," said Lithuania covering his mouth.

"I'll like, collect the rest of it before I leave," he said. He left. The two were finally alone. They smiled. Then, their lips made contact, as usual. But something was different. She pushed away.

"I smell something," she said. She sniffed again, "is that smoke?" Crap!

"I had a meeting with Greece," he lied. She nodded. He hated to lie, but as a Baltic, you learn it's better to lie than die. Poland came back downstairs. He smiled.

"Okay seriously, like, when are you two not sucking face?" he asked.

"Honestly I didn't know how much of a pervert you were until today," said Belarus.

"Well, not everyone has a hot wife like you Liet!" he said. Belarus blushed. "Liet is lucky he has a beautiful woman whom he lives with and oh, A PACK OF CIGARETTES!" Poland then left. Her expression changed.

"What did he just say?!" she growled, "Toris…"

"Poland you bastard," mumbled Lithuania. He wish he couldn't see Belarus's face. It looked too terrifying. He didn't want to describe it. He trembled. "Natalya I-"

"Sit!" she commanded. He did so. She only made him act like a dog when she was really angry. (AN: His name is a dog's name. He also looks and kind of acts like one too, so I thought this would be funny.) Lithuania was now nothing but a dog now. He was puppy at his master. He had to do whatever she pleased when she was really angry. He whimpered. "Toris, how could you?! Speak!"

"I'm sorry! It started two years ago when I was getting pressured by my boss about… something. And I missed you so much and-"

"Don't give me that 'Oh I missed you so much' excuse! You know I can't stand the smell. Plus it slowly damages your insides!" she lectured. He hung his head. "Okay Toris, I am going to give you three options," she said. He gulped. These were always very weird punishments like dancing in the streets naked or something like that. "You are not sleeping here tonight, that's for sure. So here are your options. One: I call Russia and tell him everything. Then, you sleep in his house," she said.

"No! Please! Anything but that!" Toris cried.

"Two: you sleep outside tonight in doghouse," she said, "Or three: you can sleep here, but I will scrub your entire body and mouth until it is raw and red. Maybe bleeding," He bowed his head.

Transition...

It had begun to rain. She had taken his spare set of keys and locked him out there. She had also locked the car, the fence, and set the security system so there was no escape.

"Natalya! I promise I'll be a good husband! I'm sorry!" he begged. He scratched on the door. She saw him. She closed her eyes to avoid his cute face. She then shut the blinds on him.

He sighed. He was happy it was April where it wasn't freezing. He went to the small doghouse and crawled inside. He was freezing, wet, and muddy. I deserve it, he thought. He then curled up and eventually fell asleep.

End flashback.

"Ugh, men!" said a voice. She didn't look up. "Hey girl, it'll like, be okay. I promise the bastard will like totally get what he deserves," said the voice. She looked up. She then gasped when she saw a familiar face staring back at her.

"Poland? Is that you?" He looked different. He was wearing a uniform with a white apron and had his hair tied back. His name tag read "Feliks". He had a pocket with a comb in it. He sighed.

"Many nations like, are in a rough spot right now. Sometimes we like, need a second job to keep us going because our paperwork was like, way too late," he said, "By we I like, mean me."

"I figured," she said.

"What like, happened?"

"It's nothing I can't work through. I'm fine," she said.

"You like, don't look fine," said Poland, "I have never seen you upset before. What happened?"

"It's hard to explain," she said, "But I could use your help."

"You need MY help?!" he sounded shocked, "Like, what do you need, a make over for Russia? Or a new look for Liet's stupid wedding?"

"I need your help to win over someone."

"Russia?"

"Lithuania." His eyes widened. "This is going to sound weird," she said, "But this isn't my life. Back in my real life, Toris and I are married-"

"Wait wait wait!" he said, "You're from the future?" She sighed. This was the only way she could get Poland to believe her.

"Yes Poland. I am from the future," she said.

"OMG, like, no way! This is like totally awesome!" he said, "But first lets like, go inside. Lets not like, get sick." She nodded. They went inside the salon. It reminded her of Lithuania again:

It was pouring rain. It was raining so hard, he could barely see. He then saw one lonely person outside in the rain. He could just barely make out a figure through the massive downpour that sounded like it would rip through the large umbrella. He went up to the figure who was just sitting on a curb. He went up to the person.

"Hey, if you sit out here in the rain you'll catch a-" he stopped. He saw that it was Belarus. She didnt seem to hear him. The rain was too loud. He sat next to her. His umbrella shielded her, even though she was already soaked. She looked up. He smiled. "Come on, lets get you home," he said.

"No!" she said. Lithuania was puzzled. She explained what had happened. "I never knew Russia was so aggressive. I never knew he'd hurt anyone that he wasn't fighting with," she said, "He said he-he HATED me. He never said that before. He never said he hated me before. Or used violence." Lithuania sighed.

"Well, he does that. A lot. Mostly it's vodka, but other times he-" his phone started to ring. "Sveiki?" he answered the phone, "…Oh, um sure. Of course…So how long will you be gone?…Okay d-do you need anything else sir-… Ok I will… Well have a nice time, I'll see you tomorrow…Yes, I hope she shows up too…You are welcome. Kas nors nesvarbus." He clicked off his phone.

"Russia?" Belarus asked. Lithuania nodded.

"He has a meeting with Finland and asked me to take care of the house and find you," he explained, "Lets go home now so you don't get sick."

End Flashback.

"Yes and someone interfered with the past so I had to travel back in time," she lied, "But dont tell anyone, its top secret." He nodded. Poland's attention was on her.

"Tell me more about the future!" he said.

"Toris and I are married. Ukraine is engaged-"

"Woah, slow down!" Poland said. He sighed. "I'll help under one condition."

"Thank you! You know Lithuania the best," she said.

"Tell me, What am I like in the future?" he asked. She told him the truth.

"You're not working in a place like this. That's for sure," she said.

"Really?" he asked, "Yes! I have to earn a little extra cash because I like, have none. I couldn't like, keep up with all my work because I like, didn't have Liet to help me." He sighed. "My boss always dumps way too much on me. I like, can never keep up. A normal person would like, be exhausted. I'm like, a very powerful and famous country. Liet wasn't able to see me at ALL for like, a year! And that's Lina's fault. She like, doesn't want me anywhere near her or Liet! It's so unfair! She like, has this weird thing with me."

"Weird, you're a daily part of our lives," she replied, "You always walk in and eat whatever you want like you own the place." The last part was said with a slight tone of frustration. Poland smiled. He then stopped. He sighed.

"Oh. You saw them…"

"Kissing? Yes I did. And that woman also almost broke us up last time," she said. She then told him the whole story, that took over an hour.

"i feel kind of bad if I like, ruin something like that," he said, "I must think of a plan." After a while of thinking, Poland face then brightened. "I like, know exactly what to do!" he said. She sighed.

"Does it involve ponies?" He shook his head. He then blushed. "What?"

"You have to like… um… um… like… oh how do I put this?" his face was bright red.

"I get it," she said. She smiled. "That's perfect!" He smiled in pride.

"Well…" he said with a grin. He then turned to a serious smile, "okay! Lets get to business. We have to make you look, how they say on Tumblr, f*ckable!" The last line mad his face more red. "Oh ladies!" A bunch of women appeared. "She needs a make over. We really need her to look gorgeous!" The women began to take her away.

"Poland you bastard! This wasn't part of the deal!" she yelled.

"Next is to teach you how to act like a totally different person," he said, "We are going to make you act nice."

"Poland!"

? ﾟﾒﾅ? ﾟﾑﾙ? ﾟﾑﾖ? ﾟﾑﾚ? ﾟﾑﾛ? ﾟﾑﾠ