6. Second Chances

"How did I die?" he croaked, his voice as rough as sandpaper.

Lily smiled and pulled herself up into a sitting position facing him.

"Oh Sev, you're not dead. I promise." Lily reached over and brushed his hair away from his face. "It's really me. You've been unconscious for two weeks. I hope you don't mind, but I thought I'd brighten this place up a little. I figured it would help you recover."

Severus propped himself up a little higher and rubbed his eyes. Blinking, he took another look around the room.

"This – this is my bedroom," he croaked again.

"You collapsed in your doorway when you saw me. I managed to get you into an armchair before you fell unconscious, then when you did, I levitated you in here. Before you go getting too excited, you should know I transfigured the clothing you already had on."

For some reason, the only thought running through his mind was that Lily Potter was in his bed; a place no other woman had ever occupied.

"I don't understand," he whispered, "you're supposed to be dead."

He gazed into her eyes so he could be certain that it was really her, and felt his heart beat faster when he realized that this was no trick.

"So I've heard," Lily grinned back.

Severus began to notice the cauldron, vials and other potion making materials set up around the room.

"You-you've been nursing me here for two weeks?" Severus grunted, reaching up to rub a cramp in his neck.

"Yes I have, and you were a very demanding patient. Every time I nodded off for half a minute, you'd wake up screaming. When you weren't doing that, you were moaning my name, which I have to admit got to be quite flattering after a while." She stood up and retrieved a glass of water from the top of a dresser near the door. Severus frowned inwardly as her warmth faded from the thigh she'd been resting against.

Lily handed him the glass of water, and he drank it like a man who'd been trapped in the Sahara.

"Slowly, Severus; you haven't had anything in your stomach for two weeks but soup broth and potions."

Severus glanced up at her silently and she held his gaze. She resumed her seat on the bed, took his glass and reached across him to place it on his night stand. Slowly, he slid his hand across the blanket and onto hers.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I am so, so sorry… for everything. It's all my fault…"

His voice cracked and he could feel the tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He didn't dare let go of Lily's hand to brush them away. He never wanted to let go of her again.

"Oh, Sev," Lily smiled gently. "That was all so long ago. You've blamed yourself all these years?"

A tear fell out of his eye and made its way slowly down his cheek. Lily reached over and wiped it away, her hand lingering on his cheek for just a moment.

"Dumbledore told me that the Fidelius Charm was your idea. You did everything you could. Things happened the way they were meant to."

Severus's body began to shake with his sobs, and Lily leaned over, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug. He buried his face in her shoulder and cried until he ran out of tears. She still smelled exactly the way that he remembered; slightly smoky from standing next to a cauldron, with a hint of fresh parchment and rose oil.

"I remember – in my dreams – you were crying, calling my name," he whispered in her ear.

She pulled away just enough so she could look into his eyes. They were different than she'd remembered; unguarded and vulnerable now as opposed to how hard and cold they'd seemed as a teenager. She sniffed and swallowed hard around the knot that had formed in her throat.

"I didn't know what I'd do if I lost you again," she breathed, barely a whisper.

Severus's heart pounded. He reached up and brushed her hair behind her ear, combing his fingers through and resting his hand on the back of her head, "I've spent sixteen years thinking I'd lost you forever, and now here you are. Before another moment passes, I want you to know; I love you."

Lily took a deep breath and leaned forward. Severus had imagined what this moment would be like for as long as he could remember, but never, in any of his visions, had kissing Lily Potter felt like this. He pulled her tightly against him and parted his lips, fireworks exploding throughout his entire body and an electrical storm going off in his brain.