A/N: I want to thank Guest, Guest and Noh-chan for my first ever reviews!

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Chapter 2

Rhys dropped us at the bottom of the steps to Tamlin's manor. Tamlin stood stiffly next to the doors and Azriel was at the bottom of the steps, awaiting us. They didn't take their eyes off each other. I glanced at Elain, who'd grabbed my hand as soon as Rhys had let go, and gave her a reassuring smile, then I turned to Tamlin.

"Hello Tamlin."

He was about to say something to me as he tore his eyes from Azriel, but as he saw me, his words seemed to catch in his throat and he stood completely still, as if in shock. Azriel stepped in front of me, his hand on a handle of one of his daggers.

Elain looked between the three of us and took a tentative step forward and said to Tamlin "I remember you, you were there in Hybern, with the Cauldron."

Tamlin seemed to un-freeze and looked at Elain, seeming to take in her too thin appearance, pale skin, the dark circles under her eyes and I wondered if he was remembering me in those months after Under the Mountain, before Rhys had rescued me. He started walking slowly down the steps to us, Azriel not moving. When he got to us I stepped out from behind Azriel and Tamlin looked me up and down then turned to Elain.

"Yes, I was in Hybern, but you weren't supposed to be. I'm sorry for what happened to you and your other sister. I've prepared some rooms for you, but feel free to go wherever you want whilst you're here."

Elain murmured her thanks as Tamlin once again turned to me. It felt like he was having an internal dilemma, not knowing what to say.

He composed himself and said, "you look good Feyre. It suits you." He didn't wait for my response, he turned and walked up the steps and went into his study, shutting the door behind him.

A servant showed us to a suite on the 2nd floor. There was a large room with comfy chairs, dining table and three doors leading from it to the bedrooms. I'd never been in here before: A large portion of the manor had to rebuilt after the war.

I was helping Elain to settle into her room when there was a knock at the main door and I heard Azriel go to answer it. The voice I heard had me darting into the main room.

"Alis!" I cried, grabbing her in a hug.

She chuckled, then remembered herself, backed up and bowed to me, "High Lady."

I grabbed her hands and pulled her straight, "I've missed you Alis."

I introduced her to Elain and Azriel, and Alis explained that Tamlin had had her tracked down in Summer to come back to Spring for the week to assist us.

After introductions Azriel went out to scout the grounds again and Elain retired to her room for a nap. Alis and I sat in the chairs with hot chocolate.

"You look well my dear and so lucky to be with child so soon into your bond." She looked down at her hands and asked, "how did Lord Tamlin take it?" so I told her.

She nodded her head sadly. I wasn't sure how to respond, so I asked if her nephews had accompanied her. When she said they had I told her I wanted to meet them, so we arranged for me to meet them tomorrow.

Elain and I dressed in formal gowns for dinner whilst Azriel wore his usual Illyrian fighting leathers. Tamlin was waiting outside the dining room for us and we went in together in silence. Dinner was mostly quiet, with stilted conversation. Every question I posed to Tamlin was answered in one word. I glanced across the table to Azriel and honestly wished I could surround myself in shadows just like him. Elain kept her focus solely on her plate, not talking to any of us, pushing most of the food around.

After dinner Azriel offered to take Elain back to our suite whilst I went for a walk. Just as I was leaving Tamlin came up behind me.

"What's wrong with her?" It was the most he'd talked to me.

"The Cauldron and Hybern happened. She's not adapted to life as Fae. To be honest, Nesta hasn't either, but she's coping better than Elain."

Tamlin looked at his feet and shifted uneasily, "what can I do to help?"

I sighed and threw my head back, "I don't know," I answered, tears starting to spill down my cheeks. "I'm so worried", I continued, "she cries and barely eats, sleeps or talks. I'm scared that changing somehow broke her mind. Yes, she's a seer, but that still doesn't explain everything else. Sometimes she seems to be a bit better, but she's still so vulnerable."

Tamlin looked at me, and seemed shocked at my silent tears. I made to turn away, to go back to my room, but he caught my wrist and I stopped, "I'll do anything I can to help her."

He let go of my wrist and I thanked him as I returned to the suite; a walk the last thing on my mind now.

The next morning Tamlin surprised us by being more open at breakfast. He went out of his way to talk to Elain, and seemed cordial with me. He said he'd be out for the day, attending to preparations for Calanmai and attending meetings, so we were free to go wherever we wanted. Azriel offered to take Elain to a meadow he'd seen yesterday, and I decided to go for a walk.

As I was leaving the manor I saw 3 horses saddled up at the bottom of the steps. Bron and Hart were on 2 of them with Tamlin's horse ready for him. They saw me leaving the manor and dismounted to bow to me. They'd just stood up when Tamlin came striding down the steps.

He climbed into the saddle and I turned to leave as he called, "Feyre, do you…do you want to come with us?"

I said yes, but then Tamlin then looked at me, "are you going to be able to ride?"

I snorted back my laugh as I went to the stable, and got the stable-boys to get me a horse ready. I grabbed a bow and quiver and jumped on my horse and went to meet Tamlin, Bron and Hart.

Tamlin and Hart were in front with me and Bron following, all of us riding in silence. As we were trotting along Rhys called down the bond to me;

How's your day?

Ok. I'm riding out with Tamlin to check on the preparations. Az took Elain to a meadow – tell Nesta and Lucien she seems a little bit happier.

Will do. Listen, I'm sending Cass down later, I need Az back here.

I groaned, and Rhys chuckled. You don't need to send Cass, we'll be fine by ourselves.

Feyre darling, we had an agreement that someone would stay with you. If you don't want Cass, I can send Amren instead…..

"No!" I yelped out loud. I could hear Rhys laughing down the bond as Tamlin, Bron and Hart all stared at me. I held up my hand, indicating that I'd answer them as I told Rhys, Fine, but tell him to behave.

I could hear Rhys chuckling as he withdrew from the bond. The 3 males were still staring at me.

I took a deep breath, looked at Tamlin and said "Azriel needs to leave later, so Cassian is coming instead."

Tamlin gave a curt nod, but Bron and Hart looked shocked.

"What?" I asked, looking between them.

Bron answered. "General Cassian is coming here?"

I gave a perplexed nod and could have sworn I saw awe and apprehension cross their faces. Oh Gods, I thought, Cassian was going to thrive on their hero worship!

At the celebration clearing Tamlin and I wondered around talking to the faeries and inspecting the preparations. We walked in an uncomfortable silence, and eventually I couldn't bear it any longer. I grabbed his elbow and stopped so he'd have to face me.

"Tam, we need to talk." I stopped, suddenly unsure where to begin. Tamlin just stood there looking at me, so I took a deep breath and ploughed on. "I want you to know how sorry I am for everything that happened, especially when I came back here after Hybern…but I wanted to thank you, for what you did for Rhys and Elain…and me." He grunted and made to move away, but I held firm, not letting go. I needed to talk, and he could drag me along if he wouldn't listen! "You hate me, I get that…"

"I don't hate you." He barely spoke as he interrupted me, "I still love you Feyre, and I always will. It destroys me to see you so happy and know that it's because of him and not me. I see how you are now, carrying the Heir of Night and would give anything for it to be Heir of Spring instead. It should be me that puts a smile on your face, it should be me that wakes up next to you in the morning and gets to come home to you in the evening. I failed you after Under the Mountain and when you originally left I felt like half of me had been torn away. I missed you and I wanted and needed you, but you were gone. I wanted to protect you, but I see now that I smothered you instead."

Tears had started streaming unbidden down my face. Tamlin cupped my cheeks in his hands and wiped the tears away with his thumbs. He then pulled me into a hug. "I should be saying sorry to you," he said into my hair, "I failed you and I let you down. I just hope that one day you can forgive me".

He sounded so down that I pulled back and looked at him. He was truly broken, both from that bitch Amarantha and then me leaving and also losing Lucien. He now had no-one, and that was why I was here, to try and build bridges, however hard that would be on both of us.

"Let's be sorry to each other and try….try to move on," I said. He nodded, looking at the ground. But, there was something else I really wanted him to understand – my gratitude. "Tam, there is something else." I let out a shuddering breath, the memories going through my head springing fresh tears. "At the end of the war…" I began. He looked at me and held up his hand to silence me.

"You don't need to thank me. I saved him for you. I couldn't bear to see you so upset and in so much pain. Hearing you scream his name as you held his body brought back memories of Under the Mountain and I remembered hearing him shouting your name as I held you. I felt so numb then, just looking at you. I couldn't see you inside, you'd gone and left an empty shell for me to cradle in my grief. Seeing you with him reminded me how I felt, and I didn't want you feeling that forever." At that I grabbed him in a tight hug and sobbed on his shoulder until I couldn't cry any more.

I didn't realise just how broken almost losing Rhys had made me. After I'd got him back I'd never confronted the feelings until now, and hearing Tamlin echo my thoughts, I decided I was going to do what I could to help him, to get his Court back to strength, to repair his friendship with Lucien and help him heal. I owed him that. We had a difficult past, but now it was time to look to the future.

After I'd composed myself we headed back to the manor. Tamlin and I took the lead and our conversation, whilst not as free and easy as it once was, flowed. I was hopeful that we had taken the first steps to repairing the split between us, and whilst we'd never be together again in the way Tamlin wanted, hopefully, we could at least be friends.

After a lunch back at the house with just Tamlin, myself, Bron and Hart (Azriel and Elain had taken a picnic), I met with Alis to meet and play with her nephews.

We were in the ornamental gardens, watching the boys run around playing when we heard an awful racket from the front of the house. It sounded like someone was trying to get in and I was just getting up to investigate when a huge roar rang through the house and gardens.

"FEYRE!" I knew that voice and hurried around the front of the house to see at least 10 of Tamlin's sentries trying to keep Cassian from entering the house. He wasn't overly trying – otherwise he'd have removed his sword that was strapped down his spine. I hurried over as I didn't want this to turn to bloodshed; I wasn't sure how I'd explain 10 dead sentries at Cassian's hands to Tamlin.

As I neared the ruckus one of the sentries saw me and tried to keep me behind him to keep me safe. As I couldn't get by I whistled loudly and they all stopped. Cassian saw me, and a huge grin spread on his face and he came striding over, pushed the sentry in front of me out the way and gave me a bone-squashing hug.

I tried to bat him away, "too…..tight….Cass," I wheezed, "you're….squashing….us!".

As if to make my point known the baby used that opportunity to give an almighty kick, and Cassian laughed, "sorry baby Rhys," he said, addressing the bump, whilst gently placing one of his big hands on it, getting rewarded with a kick for his efforts.

I strode towards the doors to the manor with Cassian falling into step just behind me. As I approached the doors they eyed Cassian warily as they bowed. "What was the meaning of all this?" I asked as levelly as I could.

"My lady," one of the guards responded, "we were not told who he was or why he was here."

"This," I gestured over my shoulder, "is General Cassian, Commander of the Night Court Army and he is here as part of my retinue and with the knowledge of your High Lord. Next time you would do well to remember who is here visiting your Court." I then turned on my heels and started walking back to Alis. "Come on Cassian, we're having cake," I said grabbing his hand and dragging him with me.

As we approached the table Alis turned toward our approach and jumped out of her chair. "I take it that brute is the reason for the kerfuffle," she said eyeing Cassian. He just grinned at her and I knew she'd pegged him for the troublemaker he was. We continued with our tea whilst Cassian wrestled with the boys then Azriel joined in when he arrived back with Elain.

Dinner that night was very different from the previous night: It was very loud with lots of conversation. I'd asked if Alis and her boys could join us and had also asked Bron and Hart – who were trying to get themselves stationed near the manor to meet Cassian.

"…and so, we were all downstairs when suddenly Feyre screams for Rhys, he winnowed to their room whilst the rest of us ran up the stairs. When we got in there we noticed she was HUGE! I mean, she went to bed normal and woke up with this huge bump," Cassian was saying, regaling them with my 'oddity'.

"But, you're ok?" Tamlin asked, looking concerned.

I rolled my eyes "yes, we're fine," I answered. "Rhys went and fetched Thesan and he checked us out. Neither he nor Helion know what caused me to skip a few months overnight."

"'Fetched Thesan,'" Azriel scoffed, "more like dragged him from his palace!"

"He didn't?!" I asked, exasperated, although I already knew the answer. Cassian, Azriel and Elain nodded. I groaned.

"Oh, don't worry!" Cassian laughed at me, "Thesan was pretty happy about it; that he's got something out of the ordinary to study. Why do you think he's took charge of keeping an eye on you?"

"When did he tell you lot this?" I demanded.

"When he and Rhys came down to breakfast after making sure you were ok," Azriel explained, adding, "you were still upstairs with Mor, attempting to find something to wear."

"You should have seen what she had to wear that morning," Elain gently said. Azriel, Cassian and I froze in shock. Elain barely spoke, let alone contribute to conversation, and here she was, talking without being prompted. She took a deep breath and continued, "she came downstairs wearing Rhys' clothes as hers wouldn't fit. The shirt barely fastened, the tunic was undone, and the trousers had to be rolled up several times as they were too long. She looked so sorry for herself." Elain gave a little smile as she finished and Alis was trying – and failing – to stifle her laughter.

"I'm sorry my lady," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Yeah yeah. Let's all laugh and Feyre and her weird magic that does weird things to her body," I moaned.

After the laughter at my expense had died down Bron looked at Cassian.

"General Cassian, the men were wondering if you'd like to train with us tomorrow."

The resulting grin on his face told me that he would like nothing better…nothing better than showing up Spring's guards. I shot him a glare that told him to behave, he merely shrugged his shoulders and looked to the boys.

"Hey boys, do you want to join us, if it's ok with your Aunt Alis?"

The boys had big beaming smiles but Alis looked unsure.

"If you're busy tomorrow but don't mind the boys going to the training ground, Elain and I can take them, if you'd like," I offered.

Alis reluctantly agreed, much to the delight of her nephews. They then proceeded to ask Cassian and Azriel about the swords they had strapped down their spines, between their wings. Never one to miss an opportunity to show off Cassian drew his great broadsword out right at the dinner table.

"This," he said, holding his sword with something like reverence, "is Viktorious. Az's is called Truth-Teller," at this Azriel drew his sword, "and High Lady Feyre has one called Arco Iris".

The eyes around the table fell on me again. I sighed, snapped my fingers and Arco Iris appeared in my hand in its scabbard.

"I can't believe a Lady has a sword!" one of the boys exclaimed in awe.

"Me and Az gave to it her after she splattered the Attor on the streets of the Rainbow; the name of the sword means Rainbow, although Rhys said we should have named it after him and Feyre said that she didn't want a sword called Prick!" Cassian beamed.

"Cassian!" I hissed mortified, "this is hardly dinner table conversation, especially with children present".

"You don't mind us talking about gory stuff at home".

"We're not at home!"

"You're fighting a losing battle Feyre" Azriel said.

I nodded in agreement and Cassian beamed that he'd won, and I could hear Bron and Hart chortling at our exchange, even Tamlin was trying to hide a grin.

After dinner Azriel left, heading back to Velaris and we were just about to return to our suite when Tamlin came over to Elain. He produced a satchel and went to give it to her, but she didn't attempt to accept it. She didn't even look at him as he started to talk to her.

"Your sister told me that you like gardening and flowers. I have a patch of land that requires tending and it's yours to plant up or do whatever you want with."

She still hadn't looked at him, just stood by my side, staring out the windows. I could see that Tamlin was trying, so I tried to help him.

"What's in the bag Tamlin?" I asked, attempting to get him to keep going with his side of the conversation. He looked down at his hands at the bag.

"Oh, yes," he looked at Elain again, "in this bag are seeds and bulbs from all parts of Prythian, that you can either plant here or take with you to plant at home."

Elain seemed to snap back to herself and noticed the bag. Tamlin saw her looking at it and held it out to her and she took it with great care. She undid the flap and a genuine smile spread on her too thin face; a smile I'd not seen in many years. Inside were lots of brown-paper packages, with pictures of the flowers and a description.

"Thank you," Elain whispered, staring at the bag.

"You're welcome," he responded, then bid us goodnight as he turned and left.

I felt the familiar tug on my bond as I was getting ready for bed.

How goes your Spring holiday? Rhys asked. How's Elain doing?

Elain is Elain, still in her own world most of the time, but she spoke at dinner today without being asked a question. I could feel Rhys' surprise. Tamlin gave her a plot of land and some bulbs and seeds and she seemed genuinely happy. It was nice to see her smile.

That sounds promising. How're you?

Fine.

Really?

Yes, really. I'm fine.

You're not fine Feyre. You were upset earlier, I felt it through the bond.

I'm fine Rhys.

Feyre…

I just…got upset when talking to Tamlin earlier, that's all.

What did he do? I could almost feel the growl.

Nothing! I could sense his doubt. I mean it, he did nothing. We were talking, trying to clear the air, and my damn hormones got the better of me is all.

There's more to it. What aren't you telling me?

I don't want to talk about it.

You don't have to talk, we're not talking; merely thinking.

I rolled my eyes and groaned at his attempt at levity, but I really didn't want to get into what happened to Rhys when we fixed the Cauldron together. Confronting almost losing him earlier had left me feeling drained, but I knew that Rhys wasn't going to let up. I sighed and took a deep breath.

We were talking about what happened between us and….. I trailed off.

And? He prompted.

And what happened to you after we fixed the Cauldron. I was thanking him, and he explained why he did it. It brought it all back, all the feelings and memories that I haven't thought about and it….it overwhelmed me.

Right on cue I started sobbing and could feel Rhys sending soothing thoughts down the bond. The next thing I know my door opened and Elain came running in and grabbed me in a tight hug, making me cry harder.

I don't know how long we were like that, but I must have fallen asleep as I woke up tucked up in bed with Elain asleep next to me, just like we used to.