Author's Note: R+R as always, people, and enjoy!

Chapter Eight; Adjusting

The material of her socks made it easy for her to shuffle effortlessly across the kitchen floor, a luxury that she was grateful for in her extremely overtired state. She had grown up as an only child and had never had children of her own, so nothing had prepared her for the restlessness that comes naturally from a child snatched from his routine. Three times Henry had awoken during the night, screaming at the top of his lungs for JJ, and all three times it had taken her an hour to comfort him enough for him to settle back into a semi-peaceful slumber.

She knew the little boys pain, and as she'd watched him drifting off to sleep each time, she had found herself wondering what was worse – the confusion that he felt at not knowing where his mother had gone, or the anguish that she herself felt at knowing that she may not be coming back. She remembered vividly when she herself was in JJ's position, cut off from the rest of her team – and she remembered clearer than that that death had been the only way she was able to return to where she belonged.

Needing the comfort as much as Henry did, she had climbed into the guest bed beside him, and spent the next few hours of the night with a loosely strewn foot draped over her head and a small drooling mouth against her arm. At least though, he was sleeping. At least, he was peaceful. At least, for a few hours, he wouldn't have to search for his mommy.

If only the same could be said for herself.

Peering through one eye, Emily lifted the carafe and poured the freshly brewed coffee into her mug. She raised the mug to her lips and moaned in satisfaction as the hot, rich liquid bathed her mouth. She wasn't certain that she'd ever appreciated coffee more than in that moment, but one niggling thought at the back of her mind pulled her from heaven. I have no idea how I'm going to do this.

Henry had been with her for one night and she already felt that she'd failed JJ. How could she keep this up? And what if JJ never came back? How could she possibly do this long term? Nothing about her apartment was baby proof. It was true that Henry wasn't really a baby, but somehow that was worse – he was at that perfect age to be able to reach everything that he shouldn't, to be curious enough to dig through cabinets and drawers, but not wise enough to realise what was dangerous. She wasn't a mother, she didn't even have nieces or nephews – what did she know about taking care of a child?

The knock at the door ripped her from her thoughts, and she ran to open it immediately, afraid that the sound would wake the small boy sleeping in her guest room. She fought the urge to wrap her arms around Garcia as she opened the door and saw the redhead standing there, her arms full with two brown paper bags and a small backpack thrown over her shoulder.

"Morning, treacle." Garcia handed one of the bags over to Emily and followed her through to the kitchen before speaking again. "Don't take this wrong, but you look like hell."

Emily cocked her head to the side in a shrug, a small forced smile pulling at the corners of her lips as she tried to play down just how tired she really was. Garcia had offered to take Henry, and it had been her that had fought for her herself to take care of him – she didn't want the redhead thinking that she wasn't capable. "I'm doing just fine, Garcia. What's in the bags?"

"Just a few of Henry's clothes and favourite toys. I figured he could do with a few home comforts to keep him going until.." An awkward silence filled the room as Garcia trailed off, both women knowing exactly where she was going with her thought – and both knowing that honestly, neither of them really knew anything. "Um, I went grocery shopping too. I just picked up some of the things that I know he likes to eat when he stays at my place. And I got organic milk. JJ likes him to have it because he had some tummy problems when he was younger." Noticing the pain flicker across Emily's features, Garcia walked over and placed a hand against the taller woman's arm. "Oh sweetie, what's wrong? Are you missing JJ? Listen, I know the two of you were.. ya know-"

Emily's eyes widened. "What?"

"Emily, come on.. You were so close to this case, even closer than the rest of us. It doesn't take a genius to figure out why. Even though, ya know, I AM a genius." Garcia winked.

The brunette's shoulders slumped in acceptance. It wasn't like it even mattered now anyway – they had no idea where JJ was and any leads that they had had, had all reached a hopeless dead end. But that wasn't even why she felt defeated. She did miss JJ, she did want her back more than anything, but she also realised as Garcia bustled into her apartment that the redhead would be far better fitted to taking care of Henry. "It's not that Garcia. It's this." She gestured towards the groceries on the island in the centre of her kitchen. "I don't know what milk he can and can't have, I don't know what his favourite games are, I don't know what he likes to eat. If you hadn't showed up with this stuff he probably would have wound up with a sippy cup of Chivas and a grilled cheese for lunch. I don't know how to take care of a kid."

"He doesn't use a sippy cup anymore, he's old enough for a regular cup." The redhead spoke with mock seriousness.

Garcia's efforts to lighten the mood failed miserably as Emily rolled her eyes and slumped her shoulders further. "Thanks, Garcia."

"Let me tell you something, lady." Garcia pulled a reluctant Emily over to the sofa and forced her to sit beside her before looking her dead in the eye. "That little boy is JJ's entire world. She always thought that she had been weak after Will left. She didn't seem to recognise that she actually gained strength in his departure. She was always strong anyway, but as soon as she brought that child into the world she became untouchable – because nothing is stronger than her love for him."

Emily raised an eyebrow. "You're not making me feel better, Garcia."

"I'm not finished." The redhead shifted in her seat. "My point, Emily, is that JJ wouldn't let someone into her life if she thought for a second that that person wouldn't be good for her son. I've known her for a lot of years, and I know that after Will, she put up a shield around herself and Henry. She never even had one night stands, Emily. If she allowed you into her life romantically, and in-turn into Henry's, she must have a lot of trust in you. That's the very reason that I think he should be here with you instead of mine or Reid's place. Give yourself some credit honey, you don't realise how capable you really are."

Emily nodded her head and nibbled idly at her lower lip, tugging it into her mouth as she contemplated Garcia's words. She had been witness to JJ's change after Henry's birth and Will's departure, but she'd never actually thought of it that way. She had no idea what it was that JJ had seen in her to make her trust her, but she was glad that she had and in that moment, she vowed to never make the blonde question that trust, in any capacity.

"I have to get back. I told Hotch that I wouldn't be long." Rising to her feet, she kissed Emily's forehead before speaking again. "She'll be home before you know it, sweetie."

CM-CM-CM

A sharp breathe tore from her throat as her eyes flew open. Her hands were still gripping at the steering wheel of the car and the sunlight piercing through the windshield told her that she'd been out for a while. She winced as the burning in her cheek penetrated her foggy mind, the memory of what had caused such pain flooding back immediately, confirming that it hadn't been just a nightmare.

She stared; for a moment, perhaps longer, she just stared. There was nothing around her but trees, trees, and more trees, and she took a semblance of comfort from realising that she didn't actually know where she was. She approximated that she was about 60 miles outside of DC, but further than that, she genuinely didn't know.

Her foot hadn't left the accelerator as she sped out of the small area of woodland surrounding Percy's property, and the day had given way to night long before she had finally stopped, a sudden lack of gas being the only factor in her even stopping at all.

A small grunt of pain fell from her blood stained lips as she found strength to push open the car door, almost stumbling as she climbed out, the sunlight blinding her more than it had from the car.

She knew that she couldn't stay here, knew that every law enforcement officer in the state would be looking for her right now; which forced upon her a reality that, until this point, had refused to set in. How had everything gotten so messed up? She could have sworn that just 36 hours ago she was going about her simple yet perfectly happy life and now.. now she was trapped in some parallel universe where nothing made sense and everything hurt.

Reaching back into the car, a simple action that took far more effort than it should, she grabbed the keys from the ignition and moved around the vehicle to open the trunk. She always found it surprising how much they were able to fit into the trunk of a police car, but she was more grateful than anything else as she rooted through the items to find anything that she could use to sustain herself whilst she figured out a plan. She pulled out a bottle of water, first using it's contents to swill the blood from her mouth before downing almost the rest of the bottle. Next she found a police issue jacket – it was unseasonably warm out today but she knew that that wouldn't last, and she draped the black garment over the open trunk before rifling through the rest of the items.

Having dug through everything in sight, she grabbed a bag, emptying it of the rifles that she was sure that she didn't want to use – she wasn't certain that she'd use any gun ever again after yesterday - before filling it with the supplies that she had commandeered and dropping it to the ground. There was nothing inconspicuous about the giant words across the back of the black jacket that she'd found – she felt pretty certain that she'd be found in a second if she walked around with the name of the prison written across her back – so she improvised, turning it inside out before tugging it with difficulty over her small frame. Picking up the bag from the dirt, she tossed it over her shoulder, ready to go as it suddenly dawned on her. Where the hell am I going?

CM-CM-CM

"How are they?" Hotch asked, genuinely concerned, as Garcia bustled into the conference room.

"They're doing fine, Sir." The redhead began as she took a seat beside Morgan. "I think it's gona take some adjusting, but hopefully it won't be permanent." Garcia's eyes widened a little as she realised the implications of what she had just said. "I mean, not that Emily isn't capable, I just mean hopefully.."

"She'll be home before you know it, Garcia." Hotch spoke gently and Garcia felt grateful for the comfort, even if she did know that it may not be wholly truthful.

The redhead hadn't fully allowed herself to register the fact that JJ was gone, and had instead thrown herself into helping Emily with Henry whilst playing ignorance to the very real possibility that the blonde may never come home to them. It wasn't that she didn't care, far from it – it was because she did care, almost as though her own sister had disappeared, but the longing and ache in her chest each time that she ventured into those real possibilities were too much to bare; and so she had decided to focus her energy on something more productive, and conducive to ensuring that everything ran smoothly in JJ's absence. But as Hotch had spoken the same words that she'd used on Emily just forty minutes prior, she realised how much she had needed to hear them.

"So what are we gona do to ensure that happens?" Morgan spoke the question burning at everybody's lips. "Do we follow the same procedure we would with an unsub? Ya know, press conferences, a profile? Or.. what?"

"We may not need to. Look." Hotch placed a newspaper in the middle of the round table for his agent's to see before he spoke again. "JJ wouldn't have left if she knew that Henry was okay, even if she does think that she's facing time in jail. Which leads me to believe that Percy convinced her otherwise. I'm hoping that as soon as she sees this she will come home."

"She wasn't really in her right mind though, Aaron. After what she went through, she couldn't have been." Rossi spoke honestly. "And what if this has a backward effect? We all know that that boy is her life, maybe she'll think it's better if he never sees her again, especially if she genuinely does believe that she's going to jail."

"We should do a press conference, get word out to her that she's not in any trouble and that we just need her to come home." Morgan spoke logically.

Shaking his head slowly, Hotch looked away for a moment. The option had crossed his own mind, but it had been shut down instantly when he remembered that he couldn't actually promise JJ that. Strauss was on the warpath, and he knew too well that if she could wrap this up in a nice little bundle – throw JJ in jail and make an example of her – she would. "We can't do that. I can't promise her that she's not in any trouble."

"What, wait.." Garcia looked up as soon as Hotch spoke. She had just assumed that JJ really wasn't in any trouble. They all knew that Percy had been killed in self-defense – they'd known JJ long enough to know that she wouldn't hurt a fly if she didn't have to – so why would she be facing any kind of trouble? It had been her assumption that JJ had simply needed time to gather her thoughts rather than that she was on the run – or maybe she hadn't allowed herself to think farther than that. "Why would she be in any trouble, Sir?"

"That man raped her, and now she's the one facing jail time?" Morgan spoke, incredulous.

"I don't know that. I just know that even if she does come home, it isn't going to be as simple as everything just falling back into normalcy. It doesn't matter what we know, she kidnapped a man, and then shot and killed him with no witnesses. The prosecution is gona have a field day with that."

"Hotch, what prosecution? We shouldn't even be discussing this. Even Strauss knows that JJ is no killer." Morgan spoke as calmly as he could – he knew that this wasn't Hotch's call and he could see that his boss was struggling to come to terms with it as much as the rest of them.

"She probably does," Hotch nodded, "but the facts are the facts, and the fact alone that the press are already running with this is just making it worse. The more we can keep this out of the news the better. This," He gestured towards the newspaper. "is already out there, and I do genuinely think that it may be a blessing in disguise. But there will be no press conference. We need to do this subtly. Strauss has given us a little time to investigate this ourselves, and as long as we seem to be making progress and keep her and the Bureau out of the press, it will stay that way."

"So what are we gona do?" Reid finally spoke.

"Garcia, I'd like you to keep an eye on JJ's cell. Obviously it's no use until she turns it on, but it's something." Hotch ordered and received a quick nod from the redhead before he spoke again. "I've also notified several friends that I have in law enforcement across the surrounding states of JJ's description. If anyone turns up that is remotely a match, we will be the first to know."

"And if that doesn't work?" Morgan questioned.

"Then we'll have no choice but to hand this back to Strauss and allow the higher-ups to do their own investigation. But we can't let it come to that. I don't believe for a second that she wouldn't feed JJ to the lions if she had the chance."

"So.. you want us to just carry on like JJ isn't gone?" Morgan asked, his calm wearing thin. A part of him understood, but the majority of him didn't really want to. He simply couldn't wrap his head around the fact that his friend was gone, and that they were to continue on with their life like normal.

Nodding his head slowly, Hotch finally took a seat with his team at the round table and clasped his hands together in front of him. Looking around at each of their eager faces, he knew instantly that it would be a waste of his breath to even suggest that they continue on like normal – their dedication was why each of them had their job in the first place, and right now, it was also the reason that he opted to forgo any kind of rules and limits. "Anything you do, goes through me first, do you understand? We're on thin ice as it is, I can't afford for one of you to play hero. We'll get JJ back, but we need to do it as a team."