Just a note about the lyrics in this chapter. I'm not fond of song lyrics in fanfic, but this song actually was what motivated me to write this story.

A Season in Purgatory
Chapter 59

How long have I been in this storm
so overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form
water's getting harder to tread
with these waves crashing over my head

Karen stared blankly at the front door, oblivious to the blanket that Dan was attempting to tuck around her. Worried, he sat down on the edge of the worn coffee table, blocking her view of the door. "We knew this wasn't going to go well, Kar," he diplomatically offered, knowing that their son's words had rocked her to the core.

Sniffling, she finally met his eyes. "I knew he wasn't going to take it well, Dan, but I didn't expect him to suggest I get rid of my baby." She slowly inhaled, trying to calm her nausea. She'd not been able to eat much more than soup for the last week and the constant stress was sapping her energy.

He looked up at her words. "Our baby," he sharply reminded her, afraid that he was losing what tiny grip he had on this child. "It's not a good sign when you can't even include me theoretically."

She leaned forward, getting closer to him to emphasize her words. "I think our son's actions just underscored why I'm not repeating the past," she coolly replied, seeing first hand what damage her past decisions had created.

Dan gave her a wary smile, knowing that she was being honest with him. "I guess he's not coming back tonight," he offered. "There goes that grounding." While he'd never managed to enforce that particular parenting skill with Nathan, Karen seemed to take it very seriously.

"He's totally out of control, isn't he?" she asked, knowing the answer before the words were fully formed. Her smart, hardworking, contentious son was becoming everything she'd feared.

Dan leaned back and honestly assessed the situation. "I'm sure he feels we're more out of control than he is." It didn't take a master's degree in psychology to see that Lucas wasn't coping well.

"He hates me," she whined, not comfortable with the distance that had infiltrated the relationship with her boy.

Dan laughed at her words. "He's a kid, Kar. What teenager doesn't hate his parents? We hated our parents when we were his age," he gently reminded her, not anxious to repeat the parental strife of his early years. Part of him had been secretly relieved when Roy and May moved to Florida.

She wrapped the blanket tighter around her small frame, a feeling of dread coming over her at Dan's words. "My parents were abusive alcoholics and you were just a miserable son. Your parents are lovely people."

He smiled at her naïve words. "I didn't think so at the time. I thought they were horribly old fashioned and intrusive," he reminded her, knowing that she'd spent nearly as much time in his house as he had. His parents were devastated when Dan had unceremoniously dumped Karen when he went to college. He reached out and grabbed her hand. "We've put a lot on him lately, Karen. Give him time and some space and maybe he'll lose some of the anger." There wasn't much wrong with his son that Valium couldn't fix, he reasoned.

She thought about his words for a moment, torn between chasing after him and dragging his ass back to his room and grounding him for life. "Where do you think he went?" she ventured.

"Well, I gave Brooke the key to my house and where Brooke goes Lucas usually follows," he surmised. While Dan was happy that Lucas had someone to confide in, he wasn't sure that either teen was particularly good for each other. Lucas was an emotional maelstrom and Brooke seemed to be falling apart on a daily basis. He was fond of Brooke and wanted her to be happy but he seriously wondered if Lucas could make that happen. His son seemed to be determined to be miserable.

"Wait, if Brooke is at your house and Lucas went after her, doesn't that mean there's a chance they'll see Nathan?" she asked. The last thing Karen wanted was for her son to blindside Dan's son.

Dan considered her words a moment before pulling her up and out of the chair. "We've got to tell Nathan before Lucas does."

if I could just see you
everything will be alright
if I'd see you
the storminess will turn to light


Brooke slid into the leather front seat, tossing the baggie of Ecstasy toward the passenger seat. "I can not believe he tried to sell me heroin. Do I look like a druggie to you?" she indignantly asked her silent passenger before she noticed the tears coursing down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Lucas," she said, tentatively reaching over and touching his tear soaked cheek. Brooke had only been gone 15 minutes. She'd left Lucas in the parking lot next to the beach so that she could meet Tim's brother. After a few minutes of discussion and his persistent attempt to get her to buy the heroin, she'd raced back to the car.

She could feel him shaking under her hand. "Please talk to me," she whispered, cajoling him with both her voice and her touch.

He pulled away, groping for the plastic baggie she'd tossed into the car earlier. Grabbing the nearly empty bottle of gin, he swallowed the X tablet and leaned back in his seat, praying it would take affect as quickly as usual. Sighing, he looked over at Brooke in desperation. "What am I supposed to do now?"

Her heart broke as she watched his absolute despair. "I have no clue, Luke. Sometimes I think our families are so screwed up that there is nothing we can do to fix them," she admitted. The idea of Dan and Karen having a baby was too much to comprehend.

Lucas pointed toward the baggie, where three pills remained. "There are days that I think this is the only fix," he revealed, anxious for the rush of adrenaline to hit him. The best thing about X was the powerful surge of energy followed by a nearly euphoric state. It might not solve all the issues he had, but at least he'd not think about them for a good six hours. Remembering that Brooke had been depressed the entire week, he glanced over at her and took her hand, saying the one thing guaranteed to make her happy. "Let's go find a party."

and I will walk on water
and you will catch me if I fall
and I will get lost into your eyes
and everything will be alright
and everything will be alright


Karen paused impatiently behind Dan, waiting for him to get the front door open. "I don't see Brooke's car," she noted as they stepped into the spacious foyer. Her mind raced at the implications of where her son might be. It was hard not to worry about her son when he'd been so erratic the past few weeks.

"She only lives a few streets over, Kar," he explained, ushering her through the foyer into the spacious kitchen. "Maybe she parked her car at home and walked over." Dan knew that Brooke's parents rarely knew where the girl slept. He wasn't shocked at anything she might do to cover her absence from home. As Karen listened to him, she took in the kitchen with greedy eyes. She'd longed for a space like this in which to create new menu items for the Café or to prepare a meal for her son. Running a hand over the green granite counter, she turned toward Dan. "I hope you are right, Dan. Otherwise, we have no clue where our son ran off to."

"Maybe Nathan knows something about where they went," he suggested, craning his head to see down the hall toward the media room. "It's too quiet in here." He grabbed Karen's hand and pulled her through the kitchen and down the hallway. He pushed open a set of double doors. "Where the hell is Nath…" his words died off as he flipped the light on and found his son on top of his girlfriend on Dan's favorite leather chair.

Nathan awkwardly jumped off the chair at the sudden flood of light. His shirt slipped toward the floor, its fall broken only by a tangle of clothes on Haley's body. Haley immediately began tugging her shirt down and her hip hugging jeans back to their normal resting place. Blushing, she was grateful that Nathan's roving hands had merely misplaced rather than dislodged her clothes.

Dan glowered at his half naked son. "Please tell me that Haley has her clothes on." Thankfully, the small girl was hidden by the large sculpture on the end table next to the chair.

Blushing furiously, Haley pulled up her low rise jeans before moving off the chair and moving over to stand by her boyfriend. Through her humiliation, Haley was shocked to see Karen standing behind Dan in the doorway to the media room. "Hey Karen," she greeted the woman even as she wondered what she was doing there.

Nate took a more direct approach. "What's she doing here?" he asked his father, feeling somewhat protective of his mother's house. Karen being there seemed to…violate his mother's memory in her own home.

Dan grabbed Karen's small hand and pulled her into the room. "We'll discuss the nakedness later," Dan replied, waiting for his son to put his shirt on before continuing. "We need to talk."

Nathan pulled Haley down with him on the black leather couch. He looked over at his girlfriend, knowing that something big was about to go down. Nathan watched as Dan and Karen exchanged uneasy glances. "Just say it, Dad," Nathan demanded, growing alarmed at Dan's nervous demeanor.

I know you didn't
bring me out here to drown
so why am I 10 feet under and upside down
barely surviving has become my purpose
cause I'm so used to living underneath the surface


Taking a deep breath, Dan mentally readied himself for the brewing confrontation. He knew he had to tell his son before Lucas used the information against him. He didn't want Nathan to get blindsided by a vengeful Lucas. He and Karen agreed that they needed to be honest with their kids and answer any questions about the pregnancy that they had.

He cleared his voice and forced himself to talk. "Karen and I have some important news that we need to share with you."

Haley stood up, growing uncomfortable with the signals that were rolling off Dan and Karen. "Perhaps I should leave you all alone," she began, realizing that this was a private Scott issue.

Karen motioned her back toward the couch. "You'll eventually hear this, so you might as well stay." Karen did not want to strip Nathan of his main supporter during such a hard conversation.

Dan decided to just say it and get it over with. "Karen's pregnant and we're going to have a baby."

Silence descended over the room. Karen took in both teen's shocked expressions and readied herself for the coming storm.

"Are you two getting married?" Nathan asked, fearing that his home was going to be torn apart. Again. He had barely gotten used to the idea that his dad was having sex with Karen and now there was a relationship and a baby to deal with.

Dan shifted uneasily, knowing that Nate viewed his parent's marriage as being born from his conception. In a sad way, his son tied being pregnant to getting married. "We're taking it a day at a time, Nate," he explained. "We plan on having joint custody once the baby gets here."

Frowning at those words, Nathan looked at both adults in concern. "So I should expect to have a baby living here 50% of the time?" he asked, not happy at that idea. He was used to being an only child. Part of his problems with Lucas stemmed from his inability to share his space and his father. Dan was the only relative Nathan had and the limited time he spent with his other son was hard enough on Nathan. What would happen with an infant invading his home?

Karen nodded at his words. "We aren't sure about how we'll schedule it yet," she admitted, realizing that there were a lot of things she and Dan hadn't considered. If she breast fed that would certainly cause issues with sharing the baby. And part of her was horrified at giving up a baby for any amount of time, especially a new born. She looked over at the kids and tried to reassure them when she felt panicked herself. "We're still in shock, to be honest."

Leaning back against the couch, Nate grew sarcastic. "Gee, did either of you consider birth control before you got hot and groiny?" Dan had been lecturing Nate for years about safe sex but apparently wasn't capable of practicing what he preached.

"Nate, watch your mouth," Dan warned. Karen laid a restraining hand on Dan's shoulder. "We were irresponsible, Nathan," she admitted. "But we're both committed to bringing this baby into two happy homes."

Haley could sense the turmoil well hidden in both adults. "Have you told Lucas?" she quietly asked, knowing that her friend was going to need her more than ever in the coming months. If he'd let her support him and be his friend.

"We just told him and to save you both from asking, I can tell you that he's very angry with both of us," Dan replied, wanting to put all their cards on the table.

Snorting, Nathan barely hid the contempt in his words. "You can't really blame him, Dad. It's hard not to be embarrassed when your parents spontaneously breed every 16 years," he retorted. "Do you understand how much gossip we'll have to live with at school?" The gossip mongers had always been harder on Lucas than on Nate, but even he could appreciate the weight of the town's judgment regarding his family.

Dan grew tense at the truth in his son's words. "It's really nobody's business what Karen and I do." He'd listened to the rumors for years about Karen and her son and it annoyed him to no end that people couldn't leave other people's personal tragedies alone.

"That might fly in big cities like Chicago or Atlanta but in Tree Hill illegitimacy is a big deal," Haley softly stated. "Lucas can testify about that better than anyone." She really wanted to lecture the adults about reality in their judgmental little town. They couldn't be blind to the gossip that ruled the church clubs and society circles.

Karen cast her eyes down toward the hardwood floors, knowing that Haley was right. "We're not getting rid of our baby, Haley," she firmly said, as Dan grasped her hand tightly in support.

Nathan looked at Karen in shock. "No one is suggesting that you get an abortion." Nathan wasn't one to tell a woman what to do with her body, either way.

"Lucas suggested that option not an hour ago," Dan revealed, still stunned by his son's cold words. Hearing Karen sniffle, he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.

Haley moved over to sit next to Karen, offering her friend some comfort. "He's just upset, Karen. He'll eventually calm down and then you can talk this out." In many ways, Haley understood the pain Dan had caused Lucas better than his own mother. Lucas had spent years masking and hiding his pain from Karen. He'd become an expert at distancing himself from Dan and the pain he associated with the word "father".

Nathan moved over to sit on the arm of the love seat next to his father. "I'm not thrilled at all the big changes this will bring, but I'll adjust," he slowly responded, not wanting to add to his dad's problems. "Just don't ask me to change diapers or baby-sit."

Laughter emerged for the first time that night. Karen's shoulders dropped a bit from the defensive hunch she'd had all night. She could sense that while Nathan was not happy about this latest turn of events, he wasn't hostile about it.

Haley smiled at the adults. "I just hope this baby is a happy event." There was nothing worse than an unwanted or ill-timed baby. She herself was the product of a late in life pregnancy and she knew that it was hard to sync with siblings nearly a lifetime older than you and parents who were restless to do other things with their life than parent. Smiling at Karen, she tried to be optimistic. "Kar, you've always wanted more than one child, so this is a good thing, right?"

Karen obviously failed to mention that she'd wanted more babies when she was younger and married. Now, the idea of a baby was nearly as terrifying as it was exhilarating. "I think it will be, Haley," she softly replied, meeting Dan's eyes and smiling at the happiness she found there. Maybe it would work out in the end.

if I could just see you
everything will be alright
if I see you
the storminess will turn to light

and I will walk on water
and you will catch me if I fall
and I will get lost into your eyes
and everything will be alright


A lull settled over the grim hotel room, neatly wrapping the two occupants in its haze.
The torn blinds did little to block the neon sign that blinked lazily outside the window of their cheap room. The past six hours had been a blur of alcohol and X and their buzz was slowly wearing off.

Brooke rolled over on her side, turning to face Lucas. "You okay?" she asked, her own tongue feeling thick in her dry mouth. The worst side affect of the X was the dry mouth that plagued her for hours after the buzz had faded. She had some suckers in her purse, if she could just remember where it was.

He stretched a moment, feeling the post rush exhaustion setting in. Lucas loved the warm feeling that X gave him. It was something akin to love and acceptance, as if someone had created a place where he felt unconditionally accepted and welcomed. There was no judgment in this happy place. Unfortunately, the happy place eventually faded after a few hours and reality crept back in. He was spending what little money he had to recapture that feeling on a weekly basis.

He gazed down at his girlfriend, brushing a strand of her soft auburn hair away from her pale skin. "I'm okay," he softly replied, pulling her closer to his chest. "A bit dehydrated though." They'd spent the night dancing at some rave near Duke, only leaving when they were too exhausted to stand.

She glanced over the edge of the sagging mattress, down at the green shag carpet. "We're out of tequila," she noted, not thinking that they might need non-alcoholic refreshment at some point. They'd managed to drain a couple of fifth's of gin and tequila, which never failed to extend Brooke's hangover recovery time.

"I guess that school is out of the question," he replied, realizing that the sun was about to rise. They'd been out all night and the idea of school was a joke. It wasn't like he cared anymore. It was hard to care about his future when he could barely tread water in the present.

"I'm sure Principal Turner is just dying to bust both of us," she noted, pulling the 800 thread count sheet up closer to her chin. The hotel might be nasty, but she'd been doing this long enough to know to pack her own sheets. She kept an emergency sack of nice sheets and towels in her trunk just in case she was forced to sleep away from home. As long as they stayed in bed, the room wasn't too horrible.

Feeling her heart pound next to his, he noted that both their hearts seemed to be racing from the chemicals in their systems. Alone, it tended to creep him out when his heart raced, but together, it felt kind of neat. Like they were in sync or something.

He gently rubbed her back, luxuriating in the soft skin his hands found there. They weren't totally naked under the sheets. He'd found that the urge to touch her was heightened when they partied like this. It took every ounce of control he had not to roll her over on her back and trace his lips over her skin. There would be a time for that soon, but he wanted to avoid sex while they were using.

Frowning, he realized that they seemed to be high more often than not. He'd need to make sure he stayed sober more in the future. He pulled away from her, so he could fully see her face in the dim light of the room. "Do you remember what I said the night we beat up your step-brother?" he suddenly asked. Her brow creased in concentration, examining that awful night. "I don't want to go back to that night," she murmured. The point of drinking so much was to forget nights like that.

"I told you I thought I was in love with you," he gently reminded her. She smiled at his words, cherishing any kind words people could spare for her.

He waited for a moment then continued when he had her full attention. "Well, I don't think anymore," he firmly stated. "I know I'm in love with you." He couldn't think of spending a single moment of his life without her. In a world of betrayal, Brooke was an anchor in his storm.

Brooke's heart pounded even faster than it was before. She'd never felt such an unconditional love before. She felt like Lucas would always take care of her protect her from the worst the world had to offer. "I love you, Lucas. I can't imagine my life without you," she softly said, running her hand up his chest.

Lucas pulled her back against him, relishing the feel of her flesh against his. He didn't know what the day would bring, but he knew he could face it if Brooke stayed with him.

and I will walk on water
you will catch me if I fall
and I will get lost into your eyes
and everything will be alright
I know everything is alright
everything's alright

*Storm by Lifehouse

Thanks for the replies to the last chapter. We're nearing the end of the stockpile of chapters I have and every comment helps motivate me to write. I know the story is frustrating to some of you but what fun would it be if everyone was happy in Tree Hill? I'm just happy no one's tried to shoot Karen yet. Comments are always welcomed. Karma to the big red winged wheel this weekend.