Chapter 8

She ran again.

Zelia exercised her freedom of speech and cursed violently the entire drive to the arena. Kissing Jon was something she only dreamt about and never thought it could actually happen. When his mouth covered hers, Zelia stood frozen solid instead of returning it like she wanted. What the hell was wrong with her? She was in love with Jon and had been since the day they met, but he never made a move in HWA. Everything was different now. He finally made one and she bolted, what sense did that make?

As soon as Jon broke the kiss, Zelia could only stand there while he ran the pad of his thumb across her lips. "Say something." He practically pleaded, voice barely above a whisper and the shade of his eyes had darkened slightly.

His mouth was warm and soft as she always imagined yet something didn't feel right. "I umm…" Her fuzzy brain tried registering what just happened, but full-blown panic overtook all rationality. "I have to go. Duty calls and all that. Good luck in your match tonight or segment or whatever you're doing." It was all said in a rush of words, her anxiety heightened.

Zelia barked out a nervous laugh that didn't touch her eyes, turned to grab her purse and jetted out the door like her backside was on fire. Jon couldn't get a word in and, just in case he decided to chase her down, Zelia flew down the backstairs instead of taking the elevator. Her lips still burned from his kiss, her entire body ignited from the top of her head to the tips of her toes. Tears stung her eyes as Zelia's reached a shaky hand up to touch her lips, trying to slow her rapidly beating heart. It was great to know Jon didn't hate her for leaving without saying goodbye all those years ago, but running away when he finally made a move…that was unforgiveable for sure.

Arriving at the arena, Zelia slipped into the first vacant dressing room she came across and locked the door behind her, unzipping her bag. She pulled out the WWE black logo t-shirt and jeans, quickly changing since she had to start setting up with the crew shortly. Just as Zelia finished getting ready and pulled her hair up in a high messy bun that piled on top of her head, her cell phone blared. It was a text message from Valisa demanding to know where she was.

At the arena, where are you? Zelia texted back, folding her other clothes and put them in her bag, zipping it back up.

I'm here too, meet me at our usual spot outside.

Of course Valisa wanted to meet so she could grill Zelia about what happened with Jon. This was one big nightmare that seemed never-ending. Grabbing her bag, Zelia tossed it over her shoulder and walked out of the dressing room, heading down the hallway toward their usual spot. A few minutes later, Zelia spotted Valisa sitting on a nearby equipment trunk and set her bag down, hopping up beside her.

"So, how did it go?" Valisa cut to the chase, the smile on her face faltering when Zelia's head lowered. "Oh sweetie, what happened?"

"I'm such an idiot…" Zelia whispered, sounding completely broken and felt Valisa wrap her arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. "Why do I keep putting myself in these situations?"

"You're not an idiot, Zel. Stop putting yourself down. What happened?" She made it a demand this time, voice harsh and wondered if she'd have to castrate Jonathan Good. "Tell me."

Closing her eyes to keep the tears at bay, the biggest wave of regret and shame flowed through Zelia. "He kissed me. And I ran away, so yes I am an idiot." A few stray tears escaped and slid down her cheek and Zelia wiped them away angrily, gritting her teeth.

Her ocean blues went wide as Valisa's jaw dropped, blinking. "He did what? He kissed you? Why did you run away? Aren't you in love with him?"

"Yes, I have no idea why I ran away. All I've ever wanted was for him to make a move and, when he finally does, I bolt. I don't get it. I hate feeling like this. When did I become a simpering coward? I mean it's Jon and I can't even…" Zelia trailed off and shook her head, completely frustrated because her words became jumbled. "I used to be able to talk to Jon about absolutely anything. We had no boundaries and I told him things I've never told anyone before, including you. No offense."

"None taken."

"So what the hell is my problem?"

Valisa remained quiet for a few minutes and tried coming up with a nice enough way to answer her. "You're terrified. You're scared to death that this is too good to be true and you don't know how to react to it. Look at it this way, you haven't seen Jon, up until recently, for how many years? 5 almost 6? So you think it's impossible that, since the man didn't make a move back when you were in HWA, he wants you now. You're questioning everything and, quite frankly, you have every right to be skeptical. I would be too." She wouldn't say what Zelia wanted to hear, but what she NEEDED instead.

Every word that came out of Valisa's mouth was the complete truth and Zelia couldn't deny it even if she wanted to. "You're right." She looked up at her friend, one of the only women she trusted in this company. "I told him that I wanted to try rekindling our friendship and do you know what he said to me?"

"Why do I get the feeling I won't like this?"

"He said he didn't want friendship from me." Zelia hopped down from the equipment trunk, folding her arms in front of her chest. "I can't help wondering what he meant by that. Because if he thinks for a second I'll rip my clothes off and fuck him on a whim, he doesn't know me at all. I'm not that type of woman, never have been."

"Maybe he wants a relationship?"

Zelia shook her head, nixing that instantly. "In all the time I've known Jon, he never once had a girlfriend for more than 3 months. He screwed his fair share of women, but never settled down with anyone. So why the hell would he start now, especially since he's a major star in the WWE? I won't be another notch in his belt, I deserve better than that."

"I don't blame you. It makes me wonder about Joe, but honestly I don't mind if he just wants sex from me. That's me though, I know the difference between having a relationship and being a fuck buddy." Valisa was blunt, sometimes too much, but she knew Zelia could handle anything she had to say. "If that makes me a slut or a whore, so be it. I want what I want."

Zelia started heading back inside the arena, so many thoughts running through her mind and frowned when Valisa stopped her. "What? We have to get inside to start working…"

"I know, but…" Valisa sighed, releasing Zelia's arm. "Just promise me you won't start avoiding him again. You can't be driving at night the way you have, not unless you're with someone. So promise me you will start taking better care of yourself."

The amount of worry in Valisa's ocean blues forced a huge amount of guilt to surge through Zelia. "I won't, I can't avoid him forever. I'll try avoiding him, but I'm not gonna be chased out of this company either. You have my word, Vali."

"Good, now come on before Ben starts hunting us down."

Both women headed inside the arena to do their job, Zelia pushing all of her issues with Jon in the back recesses of her mind for now.

~!~

Jon was in a foul mood, every part of him ready for brutality on tonight's Smackdown! taping. He sat through the meeting where his suspicions were confirmed. The Shield would start feuding with Team Hell No in the upcoming months that would lead to Joe and Colby becoming tag team champions. Then the bosses surprised Jon by informing him he'd be the United States champion when his partners took the tag team titles. That was news to him, Jon hadn't realized how fast the bosses wanted to put gold on the Shield, but none of them were complaining.

Once the meeting ended, Jon went down to the arenas workout area to pump iron, hoping it relieved some of the anger flowing through him. Joe and Colby followed, speculating what could've happened between him and Zelia. Joe knew way more than Colby did since the man didn't travel with them nearly as often as he should've. Somehow, the three of them clinked in the ring, but Joe and Jon had become close friends. Granted, when Colby and Jon wrestled in Florida Championship Wrestling, they had their fair share of feuding and beat the hell out of each other. They were friends too, but Jon didn't trust Colby with his personal life issues the way he did Joe.

"What happened?" Joe asked as soon as they arrived in the workout room, watching as Jon place several 50 pound weights on the bar. "Jon…"

"Nothing, not a goddamn thing. I only just kissed the woman that's haunted me day and fucking night for the past 5 almost 6 years since she left without a damn word and got rejected. Not a big deal though. I'm done with it. Gonna focus on what we're doing and crush anyone that gets in our way." Jon spat, breathing heavily through his nose and went to his max, laying down on the bench.

"Whoa, whoa what the hell is going on?" Colby demanded, looking between Joe and Jon, completely out of the loop. "Who is he talking about?"

Joe held his hand up, worried about Jon's state of mind and walked over to spot him since there was over 400 pounds on the bar. "What happened?"

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" Jon grunted out, pumping the iron up and down, already in his Shield clothing with taped hands. "She told me what happened. I kissed her. She bolted. Not really much else to fucking say."

Joe had to talk to Valisa and find out what Zelia's problem was because he hated seeing Jon like this. The man was obviously heartbroken and hiding it the best he could. He looked up at a perplexed Colby and wondered if Jon wanted the man in the loop, deciding it wasn't his place. Then again, what if Colby tried making a move on Zelia, not realizing who she was to Jon?

"There's a girl on the ring crew named Zelia and she has a past with our boy." Joe said