Chapter 9 – The Adventurer and The Pantheist

The next few days passed by eventfully. Aisha found herself spending more and more time away from the others, spending time at the docks taking in the sea air and pretending she was somewhere else. Anders taught her to meditate and ground her emotions; but he also taught her stories of his cat Ser Pounce-a-lot; the woman however refused to believe the wondrous stories about the cat that Anders told. The two mages bonded over their hatred for the rite of tranquility, Anders became a father figure in Aisha's life, teaching her about magic and controlling her powers.

Then there was Sebastian. The prince treated Aisha with nothing but respect and he was valiant in a way that Aisha was not used to. He had his demons and his faults, as did everyone, but he was true to his convictions. And when he smiled, Aisha couldn't help but smile with him. She had never had any affection from her father; she had been abused and used, betrayed and sold. She deserved to be friends with someone like Sebastian, somebody who would never intentionally hurt her.

One day she and Sebastian were walking in high town. Hawke had dragged Isabela into another mission and Aisha found that she liked not having the pirate around to distract her. Having Isabela around meant a sweet sort of torture, always reminding Aisha of what she could never have.

"Are you an Andrastian?" Sebastian asked, waking Aisha from her musings.

"An Andrastian?" Aisha said in confusion, "no, I'm Rivaini."

"Surely there has been other Rivaini Andrastians, lady. There is even a Chantry in Rivain."

"Most Rivaini believe in the Qun," Aisha said quietly, "and a lot of us believe like me. That the divine is everywhere."

"I understand that you spent time in the chantry…" Sebastian began, threading carefully.

"Please Sebastian, I was a tranquil then. I had no feelings to search for a religion."

"I'm sorry; I can't imagine how difficult your life has been. But, please, if I may. Whether you were taught it or not, the Maker has room at His side for every soul. Even yours."

They stopped walking then and Sebastian turned towards her.

"Did you know I used to be like your friend? Before I went to the Chantry I used to be out all hours, drinking and whoring. I didn't believe in anything except my own pleasure."

"Isabela cares about other things. She cares about me."

Sebastian threw her a look.

"Here we are."

Aisha noticed that they were standing outside the Chantry.

"I want to show you something," he said, "would you let me?"

His smile was contagious; Aisha had to smile back at him. So she did, and then agreed.

Sebastian wanted for her to meet Grand Cleric Elthina. He wanted her to tell Aisha of her own childhood, and how faith in the Maker had helped her.

He guided Aisha up the stairs to the small podium where Elthina could always be found.

"Grand Cleric," he said, "this is the young mage I was telling you about."

Elthina smiled warmly and held out her hands for Aisha to grab.

"Come here child," the Grand Cleric looked briefly at the mark of tranquility that would always mark her forehead, "I am sorry if this was done to you without cause."

"I was sold," Aisha said without emotion.

"There are always people in high places with power who don't manage the responsibility that comes with it."

"Grand Cleric," Sebastian chimed in, "I was hoping that you could tell Aisha about your childhood and how you came to truly believe in the Maker."

"When I was young I didn't have faith," Elthina started, "I was taken in by the Chantry when my parents died of fever. I was so angry, angry at the Maker for letting my parents die, angry at my parents for dying..."

Aisha almost rolled her eyes. Sebastian made her smile, and she could tolerate him talking about religion. But this was too much; she didn't want to listen to whatever sob-story that had brought Elthina to her faith. Aisha had no intention of becoming an Andrastian; instead she found herself growing bored.

She needn't worry. The conversation soon drifted from Elthina to Sebastian and his faith. Aisha's mind also drifted from the Andrastians in front of her to a certain pirate. She remembered the last time they had been at the Chantry and Isabela had muttered under her breath "Smells like repression." Aisha suddenly noticed that Sebastian and Elthina had stopped talking and were looking at her. At the thought of Isabela's comment, Aisha had apparently giggled out loud.

"Sorry," she mumbled and looked down and listened as Sebastian and Elthina continued to talk.

"I just thought that it would be different!" Sebastian exclaimed, "Hawke killed the people who were responsible for my parents' death. I should feel like justice has been served."

"Death is never justice!" Elthina continued but then they were interrupted by quick footsteps. It was Hawke, followed by Isabela, Merrill, Varric and Aveline. Aisha couldn't help but smile at her friend and Isabela winked at her quickly.

…

Everybody was surprised when the red-haired woman appeared behind the newly slayed men. Her appearance struck a core within Aisha, but the mage couldn't place where she had seen her. Isabela could though.

"Leliana?"

The red-haired looked up with equal surprise.

"Isabela?" She said.

The pirate threw her head back and laughed.

"Sister Nightingale, indeed! I remember it didn't take much to make you sing."

Leliana (and Hawke) looked embarrassed, Merrill however looked as happy as ever.

"Oh, I like singing," she chimed, "were you to in a choir together?"

Aisha had to work very hard to keep herself from rolling her eyes.

Isabela smiled at her.

"Not exactly, kitten."

Then Leliana cast a look at Aisha, her eyes shone with recognition for a moment but then she turned to Hawke.

"Perhaps we should get back to the reason, I'm here."

An hour later Aisha, once again, was walking by Sebastian's side on their way to the Chantry.

"I'm going to talk with Elthina," he said to her, "do you think Hawke will be able to talk her into leaving?"

"No," Aisha said frankly, "I do not think she will abandon her post. The way she talked about her role, it means everything to her."

"You are probably right. I guess she wouldn't be a proper Grand Cleric if she wasn't like that."

"Isabela."

"Huh?" Isabela had paying attention to Aisha's and Sebastian's conversation and hadn't noticed that Merrill had tried to get her attention.

"What is it, kitten?"

"How do you do that?"

"Do what, kitten?"

"You sort of… swagger when you walk. I've been trying, but I trip over my own feet when I do it."

A soft giggle escaped Aisha, and Isabela turned around just in time to see that it had been a reaction to something Sebastian had said. The pirate sighed irritably, but then turned back to Merrill.

"You just strut. It's not something you practice."

"Aisha does it too," Merrill said, "how can I learn it, then?"

Isabela didn't want to think about Aisha, she wanted to think about happier things.

"It comes to you… usually at night. It's like a lover… or maybe a burglar. Either it ravishes you or runs off with all your jewelry. And you have to run it down and stab it in the heart."

She thought for a moment.

"And… that metaphor got a bit away from me, didn't it?"

"I think it did, but it was certainly exciting!"

Isabela had to chuckled at her friend's perpetual state of contentment. Then she faked a gag as Sebastian and Aisha joined up at them.

"All right, let's just get this over with."

"A duel?" Sebastian asked quickly and with a smile. He was good at reading the pirate.

"No," Isabela replied, "the sermon. The finger-wagging, the guilt-trips. Telling me how an unexamined life isn't worth living."

She was rewarded with a small smile from Aisha.

"I wasn't going to…"

But Isabela interrupted him.

"You weren't? You weren't going to tell me to comfort the needy and give freely of myself?"

Sebastian chuckled.

"From what I hear, you already give yourself quite freely," the prince thought that that would have coaxed another giggle from Aisha but the woman said nothing. She did not want to think of Isabela giving herself freely to anyone.

"Oooh," Isabela just replied, "you got me there."

Then there was no more time for carefree banter because they had arrived at the Chantry.