The good thing about getting used to never sleeping more than five or six hours a day was that Fitz could easily spend half his night watching Doctor Who and still be up at seven and have a very productive day. The bad thing about never sleeping more than five or six hours a day was that when he went to bed early to avoid hearing his roommate come home with the potential love of his life was that at 3 AM, he was wide awake and couldn't find sleep again.

Having tried every trick supposed to help you fall asleep he could think of, Fitz let out a loud sigh, pushed the covers away and stood up. There were always some weird but strangely mesmerizing shows, documentaries and animated series on TV in the middle of the night. That was how he kind of got addicted to Spongebob Squarepants when he moved to New York and had a hard time adjusting to the time difference. But just as he was about to open the door, he heard voices coming from the living room.

"Urgh!" Fitz sighed. Could Jemma and Trip still be up at this time of night? Whatever they did they had a room for God's sake …

"Urgh urgh urgh" Fitz groaned once more as he let his head hit the wall. Why did his brain have to stray towards such painful ideas and images all the time?

When his ear got closer to the wall though, he noticed that it wasn't actually voices he could hear coming from the living room but just one female voice. As he started to wonder why Jemma was speaking on her own, he realized that it wasn't her voice or accent and it was most likely coming from the TV. Deciding that it was almost certainly Jemma -Trip always slept like a log and could never stay up late unless he had a night shift- he wondered if it was a good idea to come out of his room. It was always nice spending time with her, the hour they spent talking earlier had been more than nice in fact and that was exactly the problem. The more they got to spend time together, the more he started getting ideas every time she said something nice, touched him even in the most innocent way or just shared a look with him that lasted just a little longer than it should have.

Well, he wasn't going to fall asleep again anytime soon and now his brain was stuck on her, he might as well actually be with her.

"Hey!" He said in a soft low voice as he came out of his room, trying his best not to startle her since her back was to him where she lay half lying down on the couch.

"Oh hi …" She answered in a voice just as low and soft. "Oh sorry did I wake you up? Is it too loud?" She asked when she saw his bed hair and the way he squinted his eyes to adjust to the light. He might have been awake for some time but he'd remained in the dark all this time.

"Oh no I was awake. Couldn't sleep anymore and then I heard the TV so …" He answered as he flopped down next to her after she moved back a little against the armrest to give him more room with a small inviting smile. Apparently, she always seemed happy to spend time with him, even at such a time of night and that didn't help him trying to get over his huge crush. It's only then that he noticed she was wearing one of Trip's boxer shorts and one of his t-shirts he thought he'd lost some time ago. He knew it was ridiculously possessive but he'd always loved when his girlfriends stole his clothes in the morning. There was something very pleasing and sexy about thinking that a woman wanted to have his smell on her. Well, in this case, considering he hadn't been wearing it for months, it probably only smelt of detergent and now, herself. Which was just as sexy anyway. Or would be if she actually knew it was his t-shirt and did it on purpose.

He must have been staring for some time because she was now looking at him with a confused and slightly embarrassed expression. "Great!" Fitz thought. "Now she must be thinking you're a pervert, staring at what's under the t-shirt!"

"Fitz?" She asked tentatively.

"Oh sorry, I wasn't staring at your … your-at you … just …" He started, blushing and stuttering like an idiot and he could see the beginning of a grin tugging at her lips, which didn't exactly help.

"I didn't think you were …" She started but he cut her off before she could make him blush even more.

"You're wearing my t-shirt!" He finally blurted out.

"Oh …" She breathed out and he thought he saw the beginning of an adorable blush creep up her own face as she looked down then back up at him. "But I found it in Trip's closet, I thought it was weird he had a Doctor Who t-shirt but …"

"Yeah must have put it in the wrong laundry basket or something. Thought I'd lost it months ago, 's one of my favorites …" He said smiling childishly. Even years later, that ridiculously cute drawing of a Dalek still made his heart melt a little.

"Do you want it back?" She cut him off.

"No!" He cried out then winced, hoping he didn't wake up Trip. The last thing he needed to fuel his pathetic fantasies was to see her half naked. "I mean you don't need to ... not now … definitely not now, you can hum … later yeah?" He finished lamely, his tone almost pleading and wondering if he even managed to get a single coherent idea out of his head. He thought he did because she was looking at him with a soft smile on her face but it might as well have been the kind of smile people have when a two years old tries to speak and you just nod and smile because it doesn't make any sense at all.

"No of course I didn't mean right this instant … more in the lines of getting one of Trip's t-shirts and then give you back this one … but thanks for being a gentleman though …" She grinned as she playfully nudged his thigh with the tip of her toes and he chuckled a bit self depreciatively.

Idiot. Of course she didn't want to strip before him.

"Yeah I'm great like that …" He joked. "… but it's alright really, keep it for now …" He added and she smiled widely.

"Thank you Fitz … I should have known it was yours!"

"Because it's three sizes smaller than anything Trip can wear?"

"Because all of Trip's t-shirts are kind of boring" She answered, her eyes shining in amusement and he grinned back at her. "... or shiny" She added in a lower voice and they both burst out laughing.

"Hush Jemma you'll wake him up!" He said, teasingly poking at her calf that had somehow remained half on his lap.

"Oh please he's sleeping like a log right now!" She replied, rolling her eyes as she tried to nudge him with her foot once more but he caught it before she could and held it up like a trophy with a wide grin on his face.

"Fitz!" She hissed. "Give me back my foot!"

"Nope, caught it, it's mine now!"

The idea that he really shouldn't be this comfortable touching his best friend's girlfriend crossed his mind but the way she tried to menacingly glare at him was just too adorable for him to care.

"Fine!" She finally let out, shrugging nonchalantly and extending her other leg. "Then get the other one as well, I could use a nice foot massage …" She said with a smirk and a defiant tone. But he could swear he saw something else in her eyes: some kind of hesitation mixed with hope. Like she wanted him to give her a massage but not sure if that was something they were "allowed" to do, wondering if that would push back their boundaries too much and whatever Fitz thought he could sometimes see between them would become too obvious to ignore.

Except for his brain capacities, Fitz didn't exactly have a huge ego but one thing he knew was that he was really good with his hands, to tinker with very fine machinery and … other things. And it was late and he didn't feel like fighting with himself for once. He wasn't doing anything wrong after all and well, if she was the one asking for it …

"Alright …" He grinned, letting her distractingly perfectly shaped legs rest on his lap as he used his thumbs to start applying a little pressure on the balls of her foot where he knew she probably needed it the most considering she'd been wearing high heels all evening. "But I've been told I'm really good at it so … don't complain if you can't ever appreciate another foot massage in your life!"

"Mmmhmm …" She almost moaned as he apparently found a spot that was especially achy. Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment and this was possibly the most erotic thing he'd ever heard or seen. "Yes that is … really nice … I suppose I'll have to ask you every time I need one now …"

Her voice was a little breathy and her smile definitely more seductive than teasing as she looked him in the eyes. At this point, he might have been dreaming all of this but it felt like she was really flirting now. And as he kept massaging her, slowly going down to find more sensitive spots, he couldn't help remembering Daisy once drunkenly giving him a lecture on feminine pleasure and erogenous zones and insisting that a foot massage was by far way more sexual than any other kind of massage. He'd laughed at the idea at the time but now he could definitely see it and he wished he's had the opportunity to test the theory earlier on someone who wasn't his best friend's girlfriend whom he had more than a little crush on.

Deciding that it might be safer to focus on something else, lest it might get truly embarrassing with her foot so close to his groin, he cleared his throat and turned around to look at the TV screen.

"So hum … why are you up?"

"Oh …" She let out, sounding almost disappointed. "There was this documentary I've been wanting to see for some time …"

"At three in the morning?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well I don't decide when it's aired …" She huffed with a small roll of her eyes.

"You know there are ways to records TV programs and watch them later, right?" He teased and grinned when he apparently found another sensitive spot on the arch of her foot and he could see goosebumps forming all over the skin of her leg. She tried to play it cool but he could see her earlier blush come back with a vengeance.

"I know!" She huffed indignantly once more and nudged his thigh with her other foot. "It'll be ready to watch when I come home but I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake Trip up …" She said, looking almost embarrassed. "... by turning on the light or looking at something on my phone and he's working early so … anyway I-I thought I might as well get up and watch it now."

"Oh right … so what's so interesting about it that you would … oh monkeys!" Fitz interrupted himself and Jemma chuckled fondly.

"Yeah there's that … but more generally it's about the amazon and the impact of deforestation on the fauna and flora there, it's supposed to be really beautiful and heartbreaking."

"Oh …" Just thinking about it was heartbreaking actually.

"Do you want to switch channels? I can watch it at home tomorrow …"

"Oh no no, that does sound really interesting … Actually I think it might be the one my friend Hunter mentioned recently. Said it would change my way of thinking on a lot of things … which is kind of scary for someone who always acts like he doesn't care about anything …" Fitz let out wistfully.

"Don't worry I'll hold your hand if it gets too scary …" She said half teasing, half … something else. But for his sanity, Fitz chose to see only the teasing part and just huffed as he voluntarily grazed the very soft skin in the middle of her foot, making her squirm and giggle for a moment.

After a few minutes of bickering and extremely childish behavior though, they finally managed to focus on the documentary. Just as Jemma said, it really was interesting and beautiful and unlike most people who ended up watching a documentary with Fitz, she didn't mind that he added his own commentary when it came to monkeys. In fact, to his surprise, she even asked more questions when she realized just how much he knew about them.

After twenty minutes of watching and despite what was quite possibly the cutest most irresistible pout, Fitz let go of her feet, his hands getting really too tired to continue. And as she hummed contentedly and said that she owed him one, he decided to act like it was nothing while strangely feeling like somehow he was the one "owing her one".

After ten more minutes, they both agreed that it was indeed scary and heartbreaking and somehow, without Fitz realizing it, one of them moved or maybe both of them and Jemma ended up as close to him as possible without seating on his lap, their sides and thighs touching and her head resting on his shoulder. For the millionth time since he met her, he felt like their behavior was too friendly to be just friendly but the moment was so precious and delicate that he decided not to analyze it too much and just remain that way, staying as still as possible like she was a deer coming to greet him in the forest and he might scare her away if he moved too quickly.

He also reminded himself that he should never tell her about that comparison because she would most likely hate it and roll her eyes all the way to the back of her head.

As the documentary was coming to an end and they were both teary eyed and leaning even closer against each other, they heard Trip's door opening. If Fitz still needed confirmation that the way Jemma and him acted around each was maybe a little ambiguous, the way she instinctively pulled away from Fitz looking quite guilty, that was probably it.

"Hey guys! Having a party without me?" The tall man asked with a teasing tone and Fitz felt irrationally angry that his friend was so confident about his relationship with Jemma that he didn't even pretend to be jealous. Like Fitz wasn't even a serious competition anyway despite all the time they spent together.

"Couldn't sleep and then I heard the TV and apparently ..."

"... I couldn't sleep either so we're watching this documentary!" Jemma finished for him, giving him a quick side smile.

"Oh well ... if you need something to lull you back to sleep Jemma, I can help with that ..." Trip said with a predatory smile and before Jemma could answer, Fitz made a fake gagging noise.

"Are you going to tell her about your last training session? Cause it worked wonders for me, never fell asleep quicker than this!"

"Ah ah that's hilarious dude!" He said, rolling his eyes but Fitz could still see Jemma's lips tick up in a knowing smile. She obviously had to suffer through one of those stories herself.

"It should be over soon, you can go back to bed, I'll join you in a minute." Jemma told Trip with a wide smile that felt a little exaggerated.

"Alright then …" He replied, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge before walking towards the couch. "…don't be too long …" He added with one more of those predatory smiles that made Fitz want to actually throw up a bit. And what did they say about always wearing a t-shirt when in the common areas of the apartment? Honestly, he didn't need to be reminded of his own absence of muscles on a daily basis by seeing Trip showing off his own body.

At least, the way Jemma cut short what Trip probably expected to be a much more heated kiss and ended up being a relatively chaste thing made Fitz feel a little bit better and maybe a little bit mean. Because whatever Trip had in mind for whenever Jemma came back to bed, it was definitely not what she had in mind considering the way she exuded embarrassment. She often did that whenever Trip engaged in physical display of affection, at least in Fitz's presence. She didn't seem like someone prudish so did she suspect Fitz's feeling and was just trying to spare him or was there something else there?

Maybe this was all a punishment for making fun of Dawson's Creek so much when his friends were watching it because now he felt like he was living in it, questioning every single move he and Jemma made and having cheap philosophical debates with himself on a daily basis.

-0-0-0-

"Wanna watch something else?" Jemma asked ten minutes later when the credits rolled on the documentary.

"But I .. I thought you said Trip you'd come back to bed when this is over …" Fitz replied, careful not to turn his head because in the last ten minutes, she'd managed to put her head back on his shoulder and it would have brought their faces way too close to each other. And with the late hour, the smell of her hair, the low sexy tone of her voice and the tender way she so often looked at him, he wasn't sure he wouldn't do something extremely stupid like trying to kiss her.

"Oh no, it's been ten minutes, he's probably snoring already and I don't feel like going back to bed right now!" She replied and again Fitz tried not to come to any conclusion about the fact that Jemma preferred watching TV with her head on his shoulder rather than being in bed with her boyfriend. "So what do you say? Wanna see if we can find some weird animated series to watch?" She insisted with an enthusiastic tone and he almost confessed his love for her there and then.

But instead, he managed an amused: "Yeah sure!"

Five minutes later, they were both giggling stupidly watching Patrick Star's antics (and Fitz was starting to fear his addiction might come back) when Jemma turned around to look up at Fitz.

"Hum by the way Fitz, I wanted to thank you …" She said and Fitz looked down at her like he said he wouldn't but her sentence took him by surprise and he was confused.

"For watching Spongebob with you?" He answered and she chuckled.

"Well I guess that too, not everyone would do it … but also for my birthday gift …" She added more softly.

"Oh well … it's not much and I wasn't sure you'd still be hungry for cupcakes after dinner but you liked them so much the last time … » Fitz answered shrugging, not saying that he did spend half an hour waiting in line to get her favorite despite the fact that he really REALLY hated waiting in line.

"One's always hungry for such delicious cupcakes …" She answered as she pulled away from him to turn around so she could look him in the eyes better, which was a good thing, safer at least, but it still felt colder without her body against his side. "… so yeah … thank you for that but hum … also for the book Fitz…" She finished with a knowing smile and he knew it was probably useless to act innocent but he still tried.

"Wh … hum what-what book are you talking about?" He stuttered and if there was still a chance she would believe him, the way he avoided her gaze was a dead giveaway.

"Please Fitz! I know he probably means well but Trip obviously didn't chose that book. He gave it to me saying he knew I've watched the DVD the other day and he thought I'd like to read the book as well …" Jemma said with an eyebrow raised in defiance. Like she challenged him to try and keep insisting he wasn't the one who bought it, so he chose to shrug a little sheepishly instead. Even though he was really annoyed that Trip didn't even remember what he'd told him about it being a first edition. "Of course, he didn't know that I'd been watching the movie because you and I talked about Contact being my favorite book the other day …" She added and her face remained unreadable. Well, he might as well come clean …

"Ok fine, of course I chose the book but it's only because Trip had to work and what he'd bought at first wouldn't have… it just wasn't a good idea … Did he mention that it was …"

"A first edition? No but I recognized it immediately Fitz!" She cried out and there was a big smile on her face so he supposed she wasn't mad that they both lied to her. "My dad has one, he always jokes that I'll steal it from him someday … now I don't have to anymore …" She finished, looking at him with a smile that was so tender it made his heart flutter and break a little at the same time.

"So do you … like it?" Fitz asked timidly.

"Oh Fitz …" She sighed before moving forward and gently cupping his cheek and for a moment it felt like his heart stopped or beat out of his chest, he couldn't be sure. Then biting her lip, she seemed to hesitate for what felt like hours but was probably only a few seconds and finally pressed a kiss to his cheek, lingering a moment longer than she probably should have.

"Jemma?" He breathed out, apparently incapable of taking his eyes away from her and cursing himself internally for the shakiness of his voice.

"That's a beautiful gift Fitz, you are … it's amazing ... really …" She let out, her voice soft and a little low and only when he looked down and realized her palm was still on his cheek did she pull it away but not before delicately thumbing the apple of his cheek.

"But really … thanks for the cupcake as well, I know how much you hate waiting in line …" She added and they both chuckled as they turned back towards the TV, trying to ignore the very noticeable blush on both their cheeks.

After that, they didn't talk much. Jemma's head somehow found her place back on his shoulder as they kept watching Spongebob while ignoring the overwhelming tension between them. Only when he felt her starting to nod off against him did Fitz suggested she should go to bed. Which she did with a strange almost resigned smile and not before giving him another small kiss on the cheek, leaving him feeling giddy and completely lost at the same time.

As he finally found the strength to move and walk back to his room, he thought that maybe that was how he was going to feel all the time from now on: confused and exhilarated and sad all at the same time and he should just accept it.