'Tiny hands and tiny feet.

A tiny heart that no longer beats.

Everything about you was tiny, so small.

But our love for you is the biggest of all.'

Chapter 2: Announcement: March

Wednesday, March 1st

Even though I don't say this to her face, March can be a difficult month. All months after a loss can be hard, but March was when Penny found out she was pregnant with our now deceased son.

But the one I'm dreading the most is October, cause that's when Bentley was born, and that's when we've estimated that this baby will be born.

I can say all I like about this being different, but I don't want Penny to know I'm as terrified as her. I can't imagine having gone through the pain of grief with Bentley, and then going through it again. And I can't think about how hard it must be for her.

I looked up at my ceiling, still awake. I glimpsed the time on the clock next to my bed as I moved to a different position, trying to get comfortable.

I shut my eyes, but I could only picture Bentley. Déjà Vu, it can be a bitch at times.

I shook my head, trying to remove the image from my mind, but it didn't leave.

I sighed loudly, before sitting up in bed. Spinning my feet on the floor, I remembered that it was still early, and that Penny was asleep next to me.

I tip-toed toward the door as I heard Penny stirring in her sleep. I could help smiling at her.

"Leonard? Where are you going?" Penny asked as I stopped in my tracks.

"Um.. I'm getting a glass of water." I hesitated, turning to face her.

She slowly got out of bed and approached me, as I still stood in the doorway of the bedroom.

"You're anxious about the appointment tomorrow, aren't you?" She questioned as I raised my eyebrows.

I scoffed, "No.." I lied.

Penny looked at me like I was an idiot. I guiltily looked around the room while I made it so obvious I had lied.

"It's okay to be scared about it. I'm balls out terrified." She confessed.

I stood there for a moment before coming clean.

"Okay, let's say I'm a little nervous." I suggested. "It can't compare to what you feel."

Penny smiled at my honesty, but little did she know, that was just the tip of the iceberg. She quickly hugged me as I collapsed into her warm embrace.

"What we feel about this is exactly the same. It doesn't differ between the two of us." She smiled as I gazed fondly into her eyes, which appeared dark due to the minimal light.

2017:

"Hey, what are you reading?" I asked, walking out into the kitchen, as I spotted Penny sitting at the kitchen isle.

"A parenting book." She answered, eyes still glued to the pages.

"Oh, my God. Are-are we?" I responded, my voice quickly stammering.

"Wha No! You think is how I would tell you?" She questioned.

"Well..." I started stammering, "You're sitting there with a book, it felt like anything was possible."

"Bernadette left it here." She cleared up as I sighed with relief.

I looked up at her whilst pouring myself a coffee, as she placed the book down on the counter.

"Anything interesting?" I asked,

"Well, I just saw a picture of a baby's head crowning, so I hope you enjoyed sex, because we're done with that." She nodded, her voice sounding somewhat reasonable.

"Leonard, come on." Penny called up for me as I tied my shoe.

"I'm coming!" I shouted back, slamming the bedroom door behind me.

Penny laughed and eyed me up as I jumped off the second to last stair.

"What?" I asked as she raised her eyebrow.

"Your fly is undone." She pointed out.

"Oh." I sighed, doing it up. "Better?"

"Uh-huh." She nodded, as I ran over to the front door. "You're crazy." She added, slowly following me.

"It's not my fault in excited." I smiled, standing patiently by the car.

Penny stopped in her tracks as I stopped jumping around in my mind.

"You were terrified eight hours ago." She mentioned,

"I know. But you've got to live in the moment, throw the past behind your back." I said, throwing my hands behind myself as Penny glared at me in confusion.

"I might have to start calling you Wackadoodle." She joked, as we both entered the car.

Penny smirked at me as I quickly tried to stop my leg from moving as the people behind us were complaining about me moving their chairs.

"Lost your excitement now?" She asked, as I glared deeply into her eyes.

She placed her hand out on to my knee as it slowly stopped.

"Penny Hofstadter." The nurse called, poking her head around the corner.

I felt my heart skip a beat as Penny glared at the door. She slowly stood up and walked through the door as I remained in the waiting room.

"Leonard? Aren't you coming in too?" Penny asked, walking back through the door.

I jumped up and followed her. She sat down across from the doctor as I stood awkwardly by the office door.

"Please, take a seat." He instructed as I skittishly sat next to Penny.

He looked down at the folder and sighed quietly, before looking us both in the eye.

"Okay. Let me start by introducing myself, my name is Dr. Howard Perry, and I will assist you throughout this pregnancy. You can call me, Howard or Dr. Perry, the choice is up to you." The middle aged man introduced as I felt my heartbeat in the bottom of my toes. "Due to the previous experiences, we would love to see you more than other couples that haven't been through what you have been through, just to be in the safe side with this baby. And to give it the best chance."

I looked over at Penny as she was listening intently to the doctor rambling on about nothing that was important to the situation.

"Would you like to see this baby?" He asked, smiling behind the folder as he grabbed my attention again.

Penny and I nodded simultaneously almost immediately after.

"I was expecting that reaction." He grinned. "I'll be with you in a minute." He added, walking out of the office.

I glimpsed Penny's sweet smile as my leg stopped moving completely.

Dr. Perry dimmed the lights so much you could say he straight up switched them off. I could feel my heart rate getting higher and higher as my palms started sweating.

He started up the machine as I felt like I could have bailed out at any moment.

Penny grabbed my hand and kept me sane as he went through little details.

The screen switched on as Howard smiled. He turned the screen toward us as the heartbeat echoed through the room.

"That is a very fast heartbeat." He announced as I knew it was much faster than Bentley's ever was.

"How fast is it?" Penny asked, with her eyes still glued to the computer screen.

"One-forty-three at the moment." He said as I looked in shock.

Penny raised her eyebrows as I felt relief in my entire body.

"That- That can't be normal." I stammered,

"It's different for every baby. Some have larger heartbeats than others. I'm guessing for you two, having a bigger heartbeat is more reassuring." He suspected, playing around with the keyboard.

Penny slowly nodded as I realized she had hardly blinked since they showed us the ultrasound.

"I'll be back in a moment." Dr. Perry said, before walking out of the room.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, as Penny turned her head to face me.

"Yeah." She sniffed. "That's our baby." She giggled, as my eyes started tearing up.

"That's our baby." I repeated, my eyes glued to the screen as the heartbeat continued to ring throughout the room.

"Are you okay, Leonard? You've seemed a little underneath the bridge today." Howard asked as he and Sheldon joined me at the table.

"Yeah, Yeah. I'm just tired." I stammered, rubbing my eyes.

Howard nodded as Sheldon continued to ramble on about his argument with Barry earlier that day.

I jumped inside as my phone buzzed on the table.

"Who is it?" Sheldon questioned as he began to eat his lunch.

"Penny." I sighed, lifting up the phone in front of my eyes.

I smiled as I read the short message that she had sent me. I placed my phone back on the table as Raj glared at me.

"He got something dirty." He laughed, turning to Howard.

"Keep it in your imagination, Raj." I stirred as he shrugged his shoulders and raised his arms.

I kept smiling as Sheldon looked at me funny over and over again.

"Okay, why are you appearing so happy?" Sheldon asked, throwing his plastic fork on his plate.

"Oh, it's just this picture Penny sent me." I beamed, unlocking the phone to show them.

Howard and Raj both looked at each other simultaneously and then back at the phone. Sheldon scrunched his face as he tried to spot what the picture was.

"You're kidding with us, right." Howard managed to ask,

I shook my head as they both jumped up and hugged me, whilst Sheldon still hadn't seen it yet.

"Is Penny okay with you showing us that?" Raj wondered as we sat back down.

"Yeah, she told Amy and Bernadette today anyway." I insisted.

"Well, congratulations buddy." Howard smiled, as he returned to eating his lunch.

"Why do we need to congratulate him?" Sheldon questioned as his mind was still stuck.

"Sheldon, you have an IQ of one-hundred-and-eighty-eight and you can't tell that was an ultrasound?" Howard asked as Sheldon quietly sighed.

"Actually, it's one-eighty-seven." Sheldon corrected as Howard stared right through him.

Sheldon shyly continued eating his lunch as Howard slowly nodded, before the table went silent for a moment.

I dragged my feet in behind me as I was still half asleep. I had just woken up to the credits of the movie on the empty couch.

My heart skipped a beat as I saw Penny asleep on her side of the bed, which was the one closest to the bathroom. Her braid covering her eyes. The sheets covering her waist down, with her arms tucked up close against her chest.

I smiled before joining her in the bed, almost collapsing on top of her. I kissed her on her cheek as I pulled the sheets over her shoulder. She turned to the other side as I placed my glasses on the bedside table, before switching off the dim lamp that she must of left on.

I heard Penny sigh quietly whilst she had her phone against her ear. I smiled over at her, still figuring out the equation in my head.

"Yes, mom. I'll see what he says." She muttered loudly, looking over. "I think he gets a say in it." She stated, before almost throwing her phone into the wall, which wouldn't of been the first time.

She hung up as I raised my eyebrows.

"Everything okay?" I asked, as she stared right through me.

"My mom is insisting that we come and visit in the first week of April." She sighed, placing her phone on the table.

"And what's wrong with that?" I asked, joining her at the table. "It would be perfect to tell your family about the baby while we're there."

Penny sat there in silence for a moment, twirling her finger on the screen of her phone.

"Oh, I hate it when you're right!" She smiled, gently slapping my arm. "I'll call her back."

I smiled over at her as she left the table. I looked back over at the whiteboard, mumbling under my breath. I heard Penny's voice, echoing through from the kitchen.

My phone started vibrating on the glass table, making me jump.

"Oh Hi, Doctor Perry." I said, answering the phone.

I sat there, holding my breath slightly. Penny reemerged from the kitchen, phone still to her ear.

"Uh-huh." I sighed quietly as Penny was nodding loudly to her mother.

I answered a question as I grabbed a notebook from the coffee table on the other side of the room, Penny following my every move.

After a moment, I hung up the phone, looking deeply into Penny's eyes.

"Mom, I need to go." She mumbled, cutting her off early.

I stood there in silence, adding to the tension. Penny edged her head forward as I swallowed.

"There is absolutely nothing to worry about." I beamed, as Penny ran into my arms.

I lifted her up and spun her around as her face was full of a smile. Her lips touched mine for a second as I carefully dropped her feet to the floor.

When she pulled away, I could see the tears glistening in her eyes.

"Why are you crying?" I asked, still holding on to her waist.

"These are happy tears, dumbass." She joked, before kissing me again.