Thanks for the beta work Dave. Your unyielding support means everything.

Silver

Progress

Hermione woke up with scratchy eyes and a sore head.

The previous night fresh in her mind, shame and embarrassment mixed together to form a potent amount of humiliation. There was comfort in that only Batty had seen her meltdown. Even then, she felt ridiculous.

The bushy haired witch had assumed those dreadful nights were over and done with, but last night had proven to be a wake-up call. She kept telling herself that it would be okay, that the older witch would understand and help her as she usually did- but she doubted it this time.

Batty had begun to watch the news again. She read the newspapers and listened to the Wizarding News Network - there was no way in hell she would let Hermione's little episode go without notice. The older woman would be determined to have her acknowledge it and the thought scared her.

Never mind that the previous night had forced her to realise she couldn't run anymore, Hermione just didn't want to deal with it. Not yet- not when last night was so raw. It was a Friday, the last day of her work week. She figured she'd go to work and have all day to come to terms with the fact that Batty would confront her.

It was a logical and soothing plan. So, she'd woken up earlier than usual and prepared for the day. After fifteen minutes, she made her way downstairs.

To her surprise, Batty and Hooky were already sat on the kitchen table drinking tea.

The powerful witch looked at her over the rim of her mug. 'I'm insulted you thought it'd be this easy. Bit disappointed as well- I'd expected better from you. A more thorough plan at least. Don't worry dear, the disappointment is solely my fault as I often forget how difficult the act of thinking must be for other people.' She shook her head sadly before pushing out a chair with her foot. 'Sit down love. The rat made us tea.'

Batty exaggerated raising her cup to her lips but before she could take a sip it vanished. The woman let out a startled gasp before glaring at Hooky, who raised a sardonic eyebrow before taking a bite of his chocolate biscuit.

'You are by far the worst morning person I have ever met,' she said as Hooky yawned. 'Sit.'

Hermione turned back to the witch and found herself the focus of pale, green eyes. She licked her lips and took careful steps towards the front door in a final attempt at escape. Batty, of course, saw her and laughed.

'Please?' mocked the white haired witch, her soft voice shaking with laughter.

Hermione blinked at the feminine timber of the other woman's voice and her tinkling laugh. She'd often wondered how such a sweet looking woman- who looked like the typical grandma, could be such a vulgar and evil piece of crap. It's the perfect disguise, Batty had once stated.

She swallowed thickly. 'I want to leave please.'

'Sit down.'

The brunette's eyes turned pleading. 'I've got to go Batty, I have a lot of brewing today.'

'You're not leaving here until I've had my say.'

And that's why she wanted to leave. Her gut clenched at the inevitable confrontation she'd known was coming but still didn't want. The young witch licked her lips.

'I don't want to do this right now Batty. I can't. Let's- we'll do it after work. Please. For now, just leave it.'

'No.'

'Why not?' she asked, clenching her fists as her heartbeat began to pound in her ears.

'Because the world doesn't give a shit about your little problems. It will keep turning. So you running from what is going to come will do you no good. So grab hold of whatever balls you have, sit the fuck down and face it.'

She didn't move. Not from reluctance, but out of fear. She was rooted to the spot.

Not right now please- later. Later. Later.

'Batty...'

The older witch shook her head, staring her dead in the eyes. 'You're not allowed to run away Hermione. Not anymore.'

Like hell.

Hermione shook her head, her anger building. 'We'll talk about this later. I have things to do at the shop.'

The brunette turned to leave.

'Hooky!'

A snap of fingers and the kitchen door slammed shut, an opaque shimmer encasing it. Hermione turned to glare at the small elf, who shrunk before her eyes.

'Stop looking at him like that before I get mad.'

She looked away from Hooky to the witch sat beside him. 'Let me out.'

'What was that last night?'

'Let me out Hooky.'

Eyes still trained on her, Batty tilted her head towards the elf. 'Leave the ward and go to your room. I'll call when you're needed.'

Another snap and he was gone. Hermione shut her eyes as her body flushed hot.

'What happened yesterday?'

She shook her head.

'Did something happen?'

Hermione licked her lips.

'Was it Sirius?'

She squeezed her clenched fists. 'Please Batty. I want to go.'

'No. You want to run away- there's a difference.'

Her eyes shot open, piercing the older witch. All her humiliation morphing into anger and frustration at her words. Batty's sentiment echoing hers from last night: you're a coward.

'Shut up,' she hissed, glaring.

The witch laughed. 'Should I be scared now?'

Hermione looked away, her eyes drifting over to the window as her heart pounded against her chest. It was well after eight A.M. Sirius' shift had just begun. She shook her head, licking her dry lips.

Batty wouldn't stop. They both knew it and she wasn't going to get her way. Not now.

'It wasn't Sirius.'

The sitting woman nodded, light green eyes focused on her. Waiting for answers.

What happened yesterday?

She didn't know. Hermione shifted from one foot to another. She'd been fine and then she wasn't. Her mind had turned against her, whispering things she hadn't wanted to hear and she'd been unable to stop them.

'I had a nightmare,' she muttered. Her voice quiet to her own ears. 'I dreamt about Diagon Alley and - and I couldn't shake off the dream.'

Batty nodded. 'What happened in it?'

Hermione swallowed thickly and looked at the witch. Her vision blurred as the Muggleborn woman's words came to her mind.

'It was destroyed,' she answered quietly. 'Muggleborns littered the street. Their robes tattered, filthy, bloody- some were injured. Most cried, a few begged for help while others ... A witch reached out to me. She begged me to help her up and I tried. I tried to pull her up but every time we made contact, my hands turned weak. I gave up. I walked away. Didn't look around me- didn't care. I just ... they were crying out to me and I did nothing to help them.'

The stretch of silence that followed lasted a second and an eternity. Her breaths and heartbeat the only sound in the room.

Batty looked away, making herself a cup of tea as she spoke. 'And your dream bothered you. Why?'

The brunette blinked away tears, the pressure in her chest making it hard to breathe.

'I don't know,' she whispered.

Batty slammed down her cup. Her voice snapped like a whip. 'Liar!'

Hermione's eyes shot up. Fresh tears falling down her face. She wiped them away. Ashamed and disgusted by the weakness they represented.

'I don't. Know,' she hissed, her fists shaking, the quiver in her voice betraying her.

Batty sniffed, shaking her head. Disgust pouring out her in waves. The younger witch looked away. She didn't want to see the older woman's disappointment and accusatory eyes.

Her mind raced. She knew why it had bothered her and last night's event sprung to the forefront of her mind. Impossible thoughts battled with reason. The words she now knew to be true, but couldn't admit out loud burned beneath her breast.

'Stop fucking lying Hermione. You know damn well why that fucking dream bothered you!'

She bit her bottom lip, shaking her head as more tears fell. 'No. I-I don't-'

'-You do Hermione. You know exactly why.'

She did.

'Admit it.'

She couldn't. Saying the words out loud would force her to acknowledge her dangerous thoughts.

The room spun and the Muggleborn's voice grew louder in her head as Batty stared her down.

'Please stop.'

'Why did the dream bother you?'

Please ... help me ...

'I don't know!'

'Yes you do Hermione. Why?'

She bit her lip, head shaking.

'Stop running and fucking say it!'

Don't.

'Please,' she gasped, heavy tears blurring her vision. 'Don't.'

Please ... help me ...

'Say it.'

No.

'Fucking admit it Hermi-'

Her voice cracked as the words were ripped from her throat. 'BECAUSE I DID NOTHING! People were dying around me and I didn't do a damn thing! I DIDN'T CARE! After everything ... I didn't care.'

Her knees grew weak as the deep ache she'd carried all day yesterday returned. Hermione gasped for breath as her body trembled. 'People a-re suffering ... And I'm hi-ding.' Like a coward.

A hum vibrated around her, reaching deep into her bones and she shivered from the force of it. Kitchen items rattled around them as the curtain fluttered. Hermione swallowed thickly as she took the three steps towards the table. She shut her eyes as she struggled to calm down.

It took her longer than usual, but eventually her magic settled. When it did, Batty raised her wand and a bottle flew out of the freezer along with two shot glasses.

The witch poured them each a shot of amber liquid, swirling smoke escaping the fluid as it bubbled. It was too early for a drink but that didn't stop her from downing it. She cringed at the burn and shuddered at the taste. Firewhisky was disgusting. She took another shot.

'So what are you going to do about it?'

Hermione shut her eyes and bowed her head.

'Nothing.' Because that was the right thing to do. She would do nothing.

From the corner of her eye, she saw the tiny witch nod. 'Good.'

She looked to the woman at her side, frowning. 'What?'

'I said, good. Honestly Hermione, just the idea of it is ridiculous. Imagine you, joining the war. You, who flinches at loud noises, fighting in battle. You wouldn't last two seconds.'

Hermione frowned. In her defence, she was from the future with knowledge on Voldemort. Paranoia was second nature at this point. So yes, she flinched but only because she refused to let her entire guard down. It was a hard learned lesson, one she had paid most dearly for. If she'd been more cautious, none of this would have happened.

Either way, Batty hadn't met her before so to assume that Hermione had always jumped at loud noises was idiotic.

'That's not true,' she defended herself.

Batty smirked at her, her eyes running down her face. 'Oh? How would you have survived then?'

The brunette blinked at the older witch, not appreciating her mocking tone. 'That's not fair.'

She had an arsenal of spells at her command. She worked best under pressure. She knew how to duel. Really, the only problem she had was -

'You don't have your magic-'

Batty's tea cup shattered, spilling the milky liquid all over the table. The older woman arched an eyebrow, a slow smile pulling at her lips.

'Under control at least.'

The younger witch felt her face burn. Heat raced up her spine as her body flushed hot and cold. Brown eyes bore into the tiny witch as she vanished the liquid and repaired the cup. She wiped away her tears, angry at the older woman's insinuation.

'I'm not useless Batty,' said Hermione through a clenched jaw.

'Never said you were. I'm just pointing out the obvious. You have very little control of your magic Hermione. In a battle, you would die.'

Fifth year came to mind. Sixth year. That whole year that led to and, the final battle. Adrenaline pounding in her blood and pushing her forward, steadying her as she raised her wand. Trolls, Dementors, werewolves, Death Eaters, Bellatrix, Voldemort, dragons, Umbridge, The Woman. Her life had been an endless battle the second she set foot in Hogwarts. She'd survived war once. Torture. This.

Batty was wrong.

'I may not have my magic,' she spat. 'But I'm not weak!'

Batty sniffed. 'Shit's different since the last time you were out there Hermione. It isn't the world you once knew.'

She laughed but there was no humour in it.

Hermione didn't need it spelled out for her. There was absolutely nothing Batty could say that she didn't already know. The world wasn't what she remembered. It wasn't even hers.

'You think I don't know that?'

'How can you when you're fucking hiding?!'

The kettle on the table began to whistle and the older witch gave her a pointed look. Hermione swiped her hand and the noise stopped. She stood and moved across the small kitchen, shaking. Batty's nearness was grating. Back to the sink, she faced the larger than life woman.

'What do you want from me Batty?'

'Why did your dream bother you?'

The younger woman clenched her jaw, frustration and anger coursing through her.

'I already told you.'

Batty shook her head as she stood, the effect unimpressive considering her height. 'Not yet. You've only reached the surface doll. Why did it bother you?'

Please ... help me ...

Dishes and cups rattled around them. She could hear the cutlery from within its drawer. The kettle boiled as her fringe whipped around her face.

'I already told you! Because I did nothing!'

'And why does that bother you?'

The noises around her were growing louder and she couldn't think.

A pulse of magic rippled across the room and everything quieted.

'BECAUSE I WANTED TO HELP HER! Okay? Is that what you want to hear? That I wanted to help her but I didn't. That I ran and that I hate it because it's what I'm doing now?! That I'm tired of hiding and that I don't want to do it anymore?! That I want to fight and join the damn war?!'

Chest heaving, clenched fists at her side, she glared at Batty whose smile brightened up her face. The shorter woman arched an eyebrow and Hermione blinked at the smug gleam in her green eyes.

Hermione sucked in a breath as her voice and words repeated in her head. Her heart hammered in her chest, the room spun and she felt lightheaded.

She wanted to fight. She wanted to join the war.

The brunette met Batty's eyes. She blinked and licked her lips. 'I want to fight.'

As she said the words she realised the truth of them and a heavy weight she hadn't been aware of, left her. Her shoulders relaxed and she took in a steadying breath.

A numbness settled over her and suddenly, she didn't feel scared anymore.

She took her previous seat as Batty refilled her shot glass.

'Alright,' said Batty after she drank it. 'Now that we've established that you're up for a scrap, what you gonna do about it?'

What was she gonna do about it?

Horcrux, her mind whispered and the young witch bit her bottom lip.

The diary, the ring, the locket, the diadem, the cup, Nagini, Harry.

Riddle's diary ... she had no idea where it was. Hermione knew the Malfoy's had been entrusted with it- but when would that happen? Had it happened already? If so, how was she going to get it out? Was Malfoy Manor Voldemort's headquarters again?

Tell the trut- she swallowed thickly. A shudder ran through her and she pushed the thought back.

The ring was the least guarded, unfortunately she didn't know where the Gaunts had lived. All she had was a name- Little Hangleton.

The locket ... she had no idea when Regulus died. For all she knew he was dead already, which meant-

'Hermione?'

She blinked and turned to the older witch. 'Sorry?'

'I said, what do you plan on doing?'

Endangering the future. Altering history. Possibly granting Lord Voldemort his victory. 'I-I don't know. I hadn't thought about it ...'

'Will you tell Dumbledore?'

Hermione froze and stared wide-eyed at the older witch.

She hadn't thought of that. Would Dumbledore try and stop her? He'd altered history before.

But he'd done it to save two lives. This was on a much larger scale and held catastrophic possibilities if not coordinated properly ... how much would she change? How much would she be able to change? Could she change anything?

Croaker's diary had a whole section dedicated to the topic. Time-travel was a risky thing with outward symptoms. A day could spread out through several days. Night could last an hour.

Unspeakables would know. If they didn't already-

'Hermione?'

She blinked, shaking away her distracting thoughts as her cheeks tinged.

'Do you think he'd let me?'

She didn't need to specify who he was.

'What? Join the fight?' Batty laughed at her nod, her own head shaking. 'Not bloody likely. Albus wouldn't run the risk of letting anything happen to you.'

No, he wouldn't. Dumbledore kept his cards close to his chest and she was the best card he had to play. He wouldn't let her join easily, if at all.

She turned to face Batty. 'What about the Order?'

The older witch shook her head. 'He'll just bring up your brewing and say you're doing more than enough.'

'What are you talking about?' Hermione frowned, searching soft, green eyes. 'What about my brewing?'

'Your potions. They're for the Order,' said Batty, waving an airy hand as if it was nothing. When she continued to stare, the older woman sighed and elaborated. 'My friend Flea and Tony have an agreement. Tony, and now you, brew the potions, Flea buys them in bulk for the Order. Why do you think you brewed so much Blood Replenishing potion? You didn't think it was all for the Jones kid did you?'

She hadn't thought of it. The idea hadn't so much as crossed her mind, she just ... brewed.

On further reflection, she should've been suspicious. Hermione brewed upwards to thirty bottles of it per week, logically it had to go somewhere. That she'd been unknowingly helping the Order made a spark of pride burn in her chest and she felt a bit lighter. Definitely relieved. She hadn't been completely useless.

Would the cup be in Gringott's already?

She wracked her brain trying to remember anything about its history. Harry had never mentioned specific dates but it was likely that Bellatrix had already been given it ... at least she already knew how to break into th-

'-Hermione!'

She blinked and felt her cheeks burn as her vision cleared and the older woman's face came into focus.

'I know I'm shaggable but I'm not interested, so stop staring at me.'

Her mouth snapped shut and Hermione looked down at her cup, red-faced.

'Whatever is running through your bloody mind, stop it. You just finally admitted you want to help, stop getting ahead of yourself. You'll only work yourself up and besides, you have more than enough time to help. Fuck knows this war isn't ending any time soon.'

Batty was right. But she was also wrong. She didn't have time to sit and wait anymore. She had to make a decision and she had to make it soon.

Was she going to fight? She wanted to. The more she said it to herself the more she knew it in her bones that it was the right thing to do. She could do it. She could.

Was she going to ask Dumbledore for his … his what? Permission? Blessing? Help?

How would he react?

Would he try and stop her?

A big part of her felt that he would but that part of him who told her three turns would do it, doubted it.

Something clicked in her head then: How had he known three turns would've done it?

What else had been kept off record? What had he and Croaker done?

She bit her bottom lip, frowning. There wasn't a point in thinking about this but she couldn't help it. The manipulation she had unknowingly been a part of was too bitter a subject she couldn't stomach it. Because of the scheming wizards and The Woman she was stuck here. Hermione had every right to question their actions. Getting answers was a different thing though and all she was doing was torturing herself.

'Hermione!'

She jumped in her seat and her head shot up, eyes wide and aimed at Batty.

'Stop it!' hissed the magical historian as she glared daggers at her.

Hermione bit her lower lip again, the sharp pain not unpleasant. Batty served herself another shot and drank it with a smack of her lips, light green eyes studying her face with a furrowed brow.

The brunette scowled as Batty refilled the shot glass before her. She didn't drink it though.

'Do you know who my great-nephew is?' asked Batty and Hermione's eyes grew wide as she turned to face the white haired woman. Batty snorted. 'Of course you fucking do.'

The older woman reached for the full shot glass and knocked it back. 'Today's youth know his name, but not the fact that I'm his great-aunt. I'm one of the best in my field and magical historians across the globe kiss my arse on a daily basis. Respect Hermione, is a weird thing. I'll get requests for interviews with the promise to not mention my family's disgrace. I actually had a woman say that to me once. Hinted at it, as if Gellie was my own personal shame.' She shook her head. 'Anyway, that's not the point. Fact is, no one mentions me by name when writing about him. At first they did, it was a fiasco but as soon as he faded into the pages of history, he and my name were rarely written in print together again. But before Albus kicked his arse, newspapers all over the world speculated over him and his fall from grace. While all good and entertaining, the truth was that Gellie had been a troubled child from the word go. My sister had once mentioned that her grandson had been found with a dead cat- that's all she'd said. A dead cat. Didn't say how he'd been found or how it'd died but the quiver in her voice had sent a chill down my spine- he'd been nine. As he got older, the stories got shorter, her voice grew worried and her eyes turned scared. She'd mentioned institutionalising him as a last resort once but no one really wanted that- he was so bright everyone had hoped that he was going through some kind of phase. Just needed to get away from bad influences was all ... against my better judgement, I allowed him stay here for a bit. Within the week he met Albus and they became fast friends...' Batty gave her a pointed look and shook her head after a few seconds. 'Nothing? No shock at the fact that the two were mates...?'

Hermione shrugged. She'd been shocked at first but obviously not now, not anymore.

'Anyway, their friendship only seemed natural. Two clearly talented wizards making each other's acquaintance was nothing out of the ordinary right? Except, that I knew Gellie wasn't right. And I'd known Albus was angry- after that thing with his dad, you could see the bitterness in him. Once I'd overheard them talking about the inferiority of Muggles and how the world would be better if only the wizarding world took its rightful place in the hierarchy of mankind. All bollocks of course. It was even a bit amusing considering they were a pair of scrawny kids, but I swear that a shiver ran through me. I didn't sleep that night and I remember writing a letter to my sister the next morning, telling her that I couldn't keep him anymore. The envelope was literally in my hand when they'd walked in and began to chat, asking about legendary duels. By the end of the night, I'd decided against turning him away. Within two weeks of his arrival, I'd known that it had been the wrong choice but I didn't want to be the reason such a brilliant and talented mind was put away. Every day my worry grew and only after Ariana died, that I realised my grave mistake. After a few years, Albus admitted that that conversation I'd overheard had been the first. You can't imagine my guilt Hermione. I'd ignored my instinct and people had lost their lives because of it. If I'd spoken up, Gellie may not have become what he is.'

Hermione shook her head. 'That's ridiculous, his decisions aren't yours to regret. You said it yourself, he was wrong. His choices weren't your fault.'

'I know that, but I'd settled when everything in me told me to send him away. I was his last chance Hermione. He'd been warned, straighten up or you'll be sent to an asylum for the rest of your life. If I'd spoken up, a lot would've changed. I didn't and I've had to live with my decision since and that's my point Hermione: Trust your own judgment and instinct. Rather than overthinking and allowing your brain to get away from you, stop and think. Really think about your decision because at the end of the day, you'll have to look in the mirror and live with whatever consequences come your way.'

Her thoughts quieted and the two witches sat without another word said. Behind them, the clock struck the hour and she stood on shaky feet.

'Can you tell Hooky to bring down the ward please? I have to go. I'm already late.'

Batty looked up at her as she corked the bottle. She shook her head and white hair sparkled in the light. 'Take the day off, you've earned it.'

'I can't,' said Hermione. 'If the potions are for the Order then I can't afford to take a day off. Besides, it's the least I could do.'

'If you say so. Hooky!' The wards fell and Batty nodded at the door as it creaked open. 'Think on what I said Hermione. Now, fuck off.'

Grey eyes followed the witch with suspicion as she shifted from one foot to another. Nerves on edge, he studied Granger's face.

He blinked, certain he'd heard wrong.

Sirius shut his eyes, trying to wrap his head around what she'd just said. He looked up at her and shook his head, disbelief pouring out of him as the witch stared him down.

'Repeat that?' he ordered.

She didn't say anything and again he wondered if he'd heard wrong.

Bloody woman was doing his head in.

First, she loses her fucking mind and acts like the whole sodding world didn't exist. Then today, she started whispering to herself while giving him weird looks. A few times she'd even turned to him all open mouth and wide eyed only to shut her fucking mouth and turn away seconds later.

He'd lost his temper after the third time she'd done this and snapped at her. She'd stopped but those fucking looks she'd been giving him hadn't stopped.

An answering glare usually met her when she did and still, no matter how much he'd complained about it, the fucking witch had continued to mutter to herself.

All fucking day she'd cut and brewed and whispered that the Marauder had welcomed the end of her shift just so he could be rid of her. Bottling the last of her potions and cleaning her station, Sirius had breathed a sigh of relief.

He'd stood and turned the radio off. She'd faced him and spoken. He'd froze and raised his eyebrows at her as his jaw fell open.

The petite witch had responded by pushing back her shoulders and raising her chin as he began to glare. The stubborn gleam in her eyes made him itch and set him further on edge because he suddenly realised that yes, he'd heard her right the first time.

'I want to join the Order.'

He bit back the initial reaction to swear at her and ask her if she was fucking stupid. Because he already knew the answer. Yes, she bloody was.

Sirius took a step towards her trying to gather his thoughts as that fucking spark in her eyes burned brighter.

It was official: Hermione Granger was the most infuriating cow he'd ever had the displeasure of meeting.

Chest heaving, Sirius struggled to reign in his temper. Where it'd come from and why it was there he didn't know. But for whatever reason, one that he didn't understand, the idea of her joining the Order pissed him off immensely.

He took a handful of steps and found himself within reach of her, her stool between them. Granger swallowed thickly but didn't move. Head tilted up, she continued to glare at him with that infuriating twinkle of hers. She crossed her arms over her chest and he snapped.

'Are you fucking mad?' spat Sirius, clenched fists at his side.

She didn't answer him but he saw doubt cloud her eyes. He shook his head disgusted by her idiotic comment. Disgusted by her.

Fucking bird had no idea what the hell she was saying. If she'd really known what was out there she'd be grateful for the safety and keep her ungrateful fucking mouth shut.

'I want to help,' she said through her teeth and his gut clenched.

We want to help Professor.

You're all too young.

We're of age and out of school. We want to fight.

They'd been too young and they hadn't known better.

'Do you know what's out there Granger? Do you even fucking read the Prophet?'

She didn't reply. No then.

He sneered at her, furious with her stupidity and jealous of her ignorance. 'Stick to your brewing Granger and be grateful it's all you do.'

He turned to walk away, needing space away from her and a fag. Before he reached the door, it slammed shut. Sirius stopped and looked back around at the witch before pulling out his wand.

He aimed it at the door and grit his teeth when it didn't open.

'Open the fucking door.'

'No.'

Sirius faced her and his chest burned with the determination he saw in her. She didn't know what the fuck she was asking for.

The Marauder nodded and summoned his stool. He set it before him and crossed his legs at the heel, his arms across his chest.

Being with Granger this long he knew one definite thing about her, she responded to reason better than yelling and orders. He had years of experience in making people feel stupid and ridiculous when they started being idiots. This would be a piece of piss. He'd never thought he'd have to use that skill on her though. He'd thought she was clever. Clearly, he'd been wrong, the bitch was stupid as hell. For some reason, that disappointed him.

'Why?'

His one word question echoed across the room.

Granger licked her lips, his eyes following her tongue's movement before moving up to her eyes. The witch took a deep breath before sitting.

'Because I need to fight.'

'Why?'

She glared again and he smirked at her. The witch looked away from him, dark eyes running the length of the cellar. He stared down at his boots as he uncrossed his legs.

'Because I can't sit here doing nothing while people are dying.'

His breath caught in his throat and he looked up at her through his fringe.

We can't sit around while people die Professor.

You are too young to know what you're asking for.

'You don't know what the fuck you're saying Granger.'

'Even if I don't,' she said slowly, her voice shaking with suppressed anger. 'Why do you care? It's my decision.'

'The problem with your brilliant logic Granger is that your decision won't just affect you.'

'I know that!'

'Really?' he spat. 'Could've fooled me.'

The witch shut her eyes, breathing heavily and he bit his tongue in an attempt to reign in his temper. When she spoke, her voice held a tone of forced calm.

'I know the danger-'

'No.'

'What?'

'I said no. You're not joining shit.'

The witch bristled. 'Who the hell are you to decide that?!'

You can't decide for us professor. It's not your choice to make.

'Do you have any fucking idea what's out there?' he asked her, pointing at the window. 'People are fucking dying and the last thing the Order needs is another liability, which is all you'll fucking be!'

He shook his head, furious at her flippant attitude, an image of Benjy in his mind. 'Stick to your brewing Granger.'

'I want to fight,' she said again. 'It's my decision and you have no say in it.'

'There's innocent lives at stake! You want to join the fucking Order Granger? How can you? You don't even have magic!'

Bottles around him shook and rattled. Grey eyes pinned her with a haughty look that he'd perfected as a kid. Granger shut her eyes and within seconds everything stopped.

He arched an eyebrow when she met his eyes.

'Congratulations Granger, you're a threat to shaking vials everywhere.'

The brunette clenched her jaw as she glared at him. Sirius blinked as heat ran up his spine.

'I don't need magic to help the Order,' she hissed as he scoffed.

'Really? Then how do you plan to fight? Gonna glare the Death Eaters into submission? Fuck's sake Granger- do you even hear yourse-'

'-Arabella Figg,' she said and his words caught in his throat.

How did she know that name? Arabella Figg was guarding Evans' sister, as well as the entire Muggle neighbourhood around her. Only a handful of people knew that.

How'd she fucking know that name?

The long haired Marauder didn't know how it happened but he was suddenly towering over her, his voice low and dangerous as he stared down at scared, brown eyes.

'Never repeat that name out loud again,' he hissed. 'Do you understand me?'

The witch nodded, eyes trained on him she stood and took a step back. Once again, her stool turned into a barrier between them.

He pushed back his fringe with a shaking hand, looking at everything but her.

Damn woman was going to be the end of him, he fucking knew it.

'How long did you read and know about the war before you knew you had to do something?'

Pale eyes shot to her own and he swallowed thickly. When he spoke, his voice was thick.

'I don't know.'

She held his gaze and Sirius' anger ebbed.

'I-,' Granger huffed a laugh void of humour, 'I've been a mess. Y-you know that...'

She looked down at her seat as her cheeks turned a rosy hue, when she looked up again he fought the urge to smile.

Her eyes were bright and that fire he'd known she had was out and in full force.

'I'd stopped caring about everything and I ...' she pursed her lips. 'I can't hide anymore. I don't want to.'

We can help headmaster.

You do not understand what you're asking of me.

'You don't understand Granger.'

'Maybe not, but I deserve the chance to try.'

We deserve a chance.

He turned to leave, pulling out his fags as he did. The door gave way as he reached it.

His mind whirled with thoughts of her request as he smoked. They'd been too young and still wet behind the ears when they'd joined the Order.

The Lupins had been dead set against Remus fighting but he'd shut them up sharpish.

If I don't join Dumbledore now, I won't have proof that I didn't join Voldemort when he gets brought down. I'm a werewolf. A dark creature. People won't hesitate to say I joined him cos it's in my nature.

Mrs. Pettigrew hadn't been pleased either but Pete hadn't cared.

I'm sorry Mum, but I'm going to help my friends.

Sorry Dad, but you don't have a say in this. Sirius and I are joining.

They didn't speak as they closed down the shop, he didn't really want to talk to her but something kept repeating itself in his head. He cleared his throat when they reached the bridge.

'Why'd you tell me instead of Moody?'

Granger stopped mid step, curls blowing in the breeze as moving clouds cast her in and out of shadows.

'Because,' she said, turning to face him. 'Moody and the Prewett twins would've said no. Batty ... she wants me to think it through and hold off on making a decision. Batty's owl is wild and only follows her orders. Hooky does too and he's the only way I'm able to contact Dumbledore. I'm pretty sure Batty ordered him not to call the headmaster unless she says so which leaves you. You are literally the only chance I have of my message reaching him.'

'Unless I tell Moody to tell him.'

The brunette shrugged, 'You wouldn't do that.'

'Oh?' he said. He raised his eyebrow at her. 'Why not?'

'Because I've seen you two switch guard through my window a few times. Whenever he gets here, you look like you avoid talking to him. Like you don't get on. So I don't imagine you'd share with him, not when Dumbledore is the one in charge of my care.'

'You think too much.'

The witch nodded.

The wizard pushed back his fringe as he began to walk and abruptly stopped when she said his name. Her voice soft and pleading.

'Sirius ... please...'

He shivered. Around him, the wind had begun to pick up. Rain not too far away.

'I need to try.'

'Fucking hell Granger,' he growled stepping towards her. 'If I fucking do this, I get something in return.'

He was within arm's reach of her, face tilted to meet his, she slowly nodded.

'You ask Dumbledore to move me. I don't know what the fuck is going on or what the hell this is, but I'm done. I don't want any part in it. I give him your message and you ask him to change me for one of the Prewetts. Deal?'

She hesitated but eventually gave him a reluctant nod. Sirius clenched his jaw before he continued their walk. They didn't stop for his sandwich, he wasn't hungry.

He stopped her before she reached for Batty's front door.

'I'll give him your message Granger. For whatever good it'll do. Whatever happens to you after isn't on me. You understand? It won't be my fault.'

The witch nodded, dark eyes wide and bright with fire. Her lips parted, cheeks flushed from excitement and exercise. Grey eyes looked her over. He licked his lips. It suits her.

Another nod, 'Remember our deal Granger.'

By the time Gideon arrived, his gut was twisted into knots.

The walk from his post to his home took minutes but it felt like no time at all. Suddenly he was there, knocking on Moody's office door waiting for permission to enter. Saying hello to people as they moved determinedly around and out his house.

To his relief, Dumbledore was in there with him. Sirius hadn't been in the mood to deal with an interrogation from the old Auror. He cleared his throat, grey eyes looking over Mad-Eye's shoulder to the powerful wizard sat facing the desk.

'Sir, I need to speak with you.'

At his voice, the headmaster turned with a raised eyebrow and a serene smile. 'Of course Sirius.' He gestured to the empty chair beside him. 'May I offer you a seat in your own home?'

Moody opened the door wider to let him in, the creak of the door had probably been magically enhanced for effect.

Sirius sat and decided against stupid formalities, the sooner he did as promised the sooner he could leave.

He felt shit. His stomach was a mess and he didn't know why.

'It's about Hermione.'

'I see, is she alright?'

Sirius nodded as the room flashed blue and Moody stowed away his wand. He cleared his throat, anxious over what he was going to say. Out of Hogwarts, fighting for the Order and he still felt like a student in front of the man.

He didn't want to do this and he wanted to be anywhere else but here. A deal was a deal though and if it got him out of whatever bullshit this was, it'd be worth it.

Fuck it. Here goes nothing.

'Sir, she wants to join the Order.'

'No,' growled Moody.

Sirius' eyebrows shot upwards, surprised by the anger in that single word.

'I see,' said Dumbledore and then said nothing else.

The Marauder blinked, unsure if a reply was needed or expected. He had to say something though, the silence was bothering him.

'Yeah...' he added lamely.

'How did she appear to you Sirius?'

He frowned, wondering if it was a trick question. 'Sir?'

'Albus!' barked Mad-Eye.

The headmaster focused on him while raising a hand to silence the Auror.

'I regret that I haven't visited Miss Granger in months. The last time I saw her she was suffering with terrible headaches and her magic was out of control. You see her every day, how would you say she is?'

Sirius licked his lips while inwardly thinking that the question was wildly unfair. He wasn't a Healer or an expert on whatever fucking problems Granger had. He didn't like the question and felt wrong answering but he was willing to lie his arse off if it meant no more Granger watching.

'Her magic isn't as out of control anymore. But when it does act up, she's able to control it again within seconds. She can even cast minor spells with a Potioneer's Wand.'

The headmaster nodded. 'And her emotions? Is she able to control them as well?'

Sirius shifted in his seat, hating the old man's line of questioning. He took his head. 'I don't know sir. She's not like she was at first. She doesn't cry when she goes out anymore. The panic attacks she had at first are now completely gone.' He shrugged. 'I'm no expert but she seems a lot better.'

'Forgive my questions Sirius. I know it was inappropriate of me to put you in that position but I needed to see if your account matched Batty's. It does.'

Sirius nodded, eyes downcast and focused on his boots. Mrs Potter's voice shouting at him as alarm bells began firing off in his head.

Never look Albus Dumbledore in the eyes.

'Do you think Miss Granger has the potential to act recklessly Sirius?'

He didn't answer right away because he knew she did. The Marauder measured his words knowing damn well that his apprehension has shown and that his silence had answered for him.

'Everyone has the potential to act a bit reckless sir.'

From the corner of his eye he saw Dumbledore nod. 'Truer words have never been spoken.'

He could feel Mad-Eye burning a hole in him. He kept his eyes on his boots. He really needed a fucking a smoke. And a pint. And a shag.

Sod it. He was heading out the second he left here.

'Would you trust her with your life Sirius? Or those of your friends'? Miss McKinnon's?'

He didn't have to think about it. He already knew the answer and if he lied Dumbledore would know. Probably already did, he thought bitterly and so he had no choice but to answer truthfully.

'No.'

Another nod from the powerful wizard as Moody continued to stare at him. Nobody spoke and the back of his neck prickled. The dog animagus braced himself for whatever was coming.

'Do you speak with Hermione often Sirius?'

Shit. His discomfort must've shown because Dumbledore elaborated.

'Whenever Batty is inclined to report, your interactions are gleefully mentioned. I cannot blame you for the contact Sirius. You two are alone most of the day and in such close proximity, it is only natural that human interaction is sorely missed and sought out wherever possible. I confess, it was cause for alarm at first but once Batty informed me of your ability to infuriate Miss Granger, all my concerns faded down to mild amusement.'

He fucking hated the old bat.

'We don't talk so much as argue. She's ... unpleasant.'

The headmaster chuckled at that. 'Batty has a very strong influence.'

Sirius nodded but didn't really think Batty had much to do with it. He had the very real sense that Granger was a bitch all on her own. A cunning one at that. The Marauder bit his lip. He was fucking sure she'd called him Snuffles.

'When you see her tomorrow, tell her that the Order will be honoured to have her assistance.'

'-Albus!' growled Moody. 'What the fuck are you doing?!'

'Alastor, please. Inform her that I will call upon her tomorrow night, at eleven, so that we may discuss her involvement. As such, your role too must change Sirius.'

The warning bells in his head morphed and became a violent alarm.

'I'm sorry my boy, but I will require you to act well beyond the call of duty and gain her trust.'

Sirius licked his lips as he swallowed thickly. This didn't feel right. 'I don't understand.'

'Become her friend.'

You fucking bastard. 'Sir?'

'Talk to her and gain her trust. Make sure she doesn't grow restless and act foolishly. If at any point you doubt her ability to stay within the boundaries agreed upon, then you are to inform me immediately.'

What the hell are you playing at old man?

He couldn't do what he was being asked to do. Granger was a pain in the arse and he didn't like her but she didn't fucking deserve to be spied on and monitored. She wasn't a bloody threat to anyone and whatever her case may be, he doubted it justified treating her like a fucking Death Eater.

The words were out of his mouth before it even registered that he'd said them.

'I'm not comfortable with that.'

'And I'm not comfortable with asking this of you. But it is necessary. I know this must be frustrating for you. We don't answer your questions, nor do we supply you with any information. We simply dropped you in the middle of Godric's Hollow and asked you to watch over a girl. I can't begin to comprehend your confusion but I hope that our acquaintance has made me worthy of your trust. I must ask that you believe me this once when I say that all of this, in regards to Miss Granger, is very important.'

Sirius left the pair feeling used.

He'd reluctantly agreed to the headmaster's request. Having spoken to Dumbledore, he understood that him leaving Granger had never been an option though. This was his role in the war now. First as a guardian for Hermione and now he was a spy. Tricking her with friendship. He shook his head with self-disgust and frustration.

The Marauder knocked back his drink, quickly asking the bloke behind the bar for another.

It wasn't right. He knew it. Felt it in his fucking bones and yet, he was going to follow through because the part of him who knew this shit was suspicious as fuck also understood that whatever the hell this was, was necessary.

He didn't understand the guilt though.

Grey eyes scanned the pub through the bar's mirror. The Rooster in the Mule was busy tonight. Around him gay men flirted shamelessly as the splattering of straight people eyed each other across the room.

He lit a fag and inhaled after swallowing the amber liquid with none of the respect due a good whisky.

Sirius frowned at his empty glass, unconsciously bouncing his leg.

After he'd left Moody's office and before he'd been able to ward the room, the dog animagus had heard them talk about Granger. It wasn't much but the implica-

'Got a light?'

He turned to the girl now sat beside him. Spotty, about his age, a fake blonde with dark roots, blue eyeshadow and thin, pink lips. She had disco written all over. He didn't know where she'd come from and quite frankly he didn't care.

Sirius lit her cigarette. 'I'm James.'

'Victoria.'

He smiled at her when a blush appeared high on her cheeks.

'I've never seen you here before,' he said, inching his head a bit closer to hers. 'You're not from around here are you?'

The fake blonde shook her head, speaking loudly over the noise. 'I'm originally from Manchester, just here visiting some family.'

'Lovely place, Manchester. Drove through it after my grandad died.'

The girl looked stricken and quickly made to apologise but he quieted any oncoming pity with a wave of his hand. 'It's alright. Don't feel bad. He was an arsehole whose only good trait was his fortune.'

She became friendlier after that and Sirius played along to her game with short answers and half-hearted enthusiasm. His thoughts refusing to stray farther than Moody's office.

'I have a hotel room down the street, wanna head out?'

Sirius blinked and nodded at the woman with a smile that did not reach his eyes. She left to say something to her friends and her absence barely registered.

It's too dangerous to let her join Albus! She's too dangerous!

You're right, which is why we must-

That's all he'd heard. The silencing spell had kicked in and not even his animagus hearing could penetrate that magic.

Sirius necked his pint.

The whole thing stank but that's not what had him anxious. It was the in between the lines shit that had unnerved him the most.

It was the implication that Hermione Granger scared Alastor Moody.