Thanks to Dave for the wonderful beta work and his stubbornness, without which this chapter wouldn't have happened. The push was definitely needed this time round. Thanks love.

Silver

Autumn

'You're wrong. It's okay.'

Hermione slammed down her Muggle pen, glaring him down. 'I am not wrong.'

Sirius nodded. 'You are. Transfiguration under those conditions calls for an excess force of magic, which would snap a wand in half. You're forgetting Porillio's theory and ethical clauses.'

'Porillio's theory was never proven and his ethical clauses were a joke. "No witch should attempt Transfiguration as it may disrupt her natural humours and result in female hysteria!" The man was a simpleton with no understanding of ethics.'

The Marauder shrugged, as he continued to cut Valerian Root. 'Agreed. The man was a piece of shit but from what I remember, that doesn't mean he was wrong. Not about this. Cos he's not. There's actual proof to back up his theory.'

'That floating water thing does not count,' she hissed.

'Why? Because you bloody say it doesn't?'

'Because it makes no sense! Everything that man said was circumstantial.'

He put down his blade and turned to her. 'Okay, see, now I can't take you seriously. If you're just going to push away facts just because you don't like them, then this discussion is fucking pointless.'

'This discussion became pointless the second you mentioned that sexist idiot!'

From opposite ends of the table, they glared at each other. His lips twitched and she felt hers do the same.

Hermione sniffed, looking down at the list in her hand. 'I'm still not wrong.'

Sirius chuckled and her lips curled. 'I've never met anyone as stubborn as you Granger. Honestly and I've met some pretty fucking stubborn people in my life.'

She had no answer to that. It was true. She had a bit of an issue with her pride. Especially when it came to academic discussions.

'Robert Daniels,' she murmured under her breath, scanning for his name.

She found him and sighed.

Robert Daniels, deceased four months, natural causes- there was some comfort in that.

Hermione added his letter to the pile that would require immediate delivery. With any luck, it'd be delivered by a Hogwarts' owl with a letter informing his loved one that he'd passed. She moved on, reached for another letter and tore it open.

Mark, hello you wank. I'm still alive. I'm alright. Feed my dog, don't touch my shit. Jenny x

At the bottom of the letter was a magical drawing of a man fondling himself. An arrow pointing at it stated it was You. Hermione turned over the parchment and read the name. She found Jenny Trent in the Isle of Wight, alive and well.

She was reaching for another letter when he spoke.

'You know who was a real dickhead?'

'Who?' she asked him.

'Fillmore Fisist.'

Hermione nodded. 'Absolutely. That man was a magnificent moron. "The cubic weight must be less or equal to the force used or magical injuries may occur."'

'Or my personal favourite, "Pronunciation is not important."' Sirius scoffed, shaking his head.

A giggle bubbled up her throat but she didn't say anything else. She glanced up at him through her fringe before tearing open the letter. Tina Harris from Rugeley. Dated a week ago.

My dearest Tim, I miss you. I'm miserable without you. It's pretty enough here in Shrewsbury, bit dull though as it's just kinda there. Nothing exciting or worth note. The Order bloke who brought me here, Benny or something said it's only temporary and that I'll be moved somewhere near the north York moors...

Tina Harris from Rugeley, currently ... alive and in Hutton-le-Hole, was a bloody idiot. She wrote the woman's name down on a separate sheet of parchment, which held about fifty names. Hermione cleared her throat, holding the letter up between her fingers.

'Sirius?' A ripple of magic and the post vanished. 'Thank you.'

'What'd it say?' he asked as her gaze moved over him, studying him.

Hermione pursed her lips before looking back down and reaching for yet another letter. 'She gave Order safe house locations and the name of an Order member.'

'Stupid bitch.'

She nodded but didn't say anything, watching him again and quickly looking away before he caught her. Within seconds he spoke again.

'I'm gonna turn on some music alright?'

Before she could answer, he'd already moved away from the potions and had begun turning the radio's knobs. He stopped when a familiar melody began. She raised an eyebrow as he began to sing and he glared, raising two fingers at her.

Hermione smiled, shaking her head as he sung to his momma that life had just begun and that he'd thrown it all away. She couldn't stop her laughter as he sang the chorus. All too soon her show ended and she slow clapped it out. Sirius bowed, looking proud of himself as he smiled his first real smile in days.

'I love that fucking song,' he stated and she nodded, still laughing.

'It's a brilliant song yeah.'

When the next song came on, he groaned and quickly moved to change the station.

'No! Don't,' she said laughing. 'I like this one.'

The Marauder stopped in his tracks and turned back to her. He looked disgusted. 'Is your heart set on me Granger?'

'Definitely,' she laughed harder. 'You're the one that I want.'

'I better shape up.'

Her stomach hurt by the time the song was over. Sirius singing was an altogether unique experience. When she looked up at him, after wiping her eyes, she caught him staring at her. His smile sincere and pale eyes twinkling.

She giggled. 'What?'

Sirius shook his head before looking away. His smile fell when a special bulletin came on and her gut clenched.

It'd been eight days since their midnight stroll and Sirius had yet to shrug off whatever it was that was bothering him.

He hadn't shaved in days and there were dark smudges beneath his red rimmed eyes. He couldn't stand silence and stiffened with every sudden noise.

Hermione watched him as he listened to the news, his body taut and face grim.

'-he grandmother stands behind her granddaughter insisting she could not have murdered her family. She has vowed to find the true culprits and bring them to justice. For now, she has hired a lawyer to defend her granddaughter. We will bring you more news as it develops.'

Sirius turned off the radio, submerging them in cold and bitter silence.

After several seconds Sirius spoke, saying what she suspected.

'Imperio or Death Eaters.'

'Yeah.'

'He's starting up again.'

Hermione blinked at the letter in her hand, frowning.

The first war peaked in the late seventies and only stopped because of Harry. Which meant, now.

The war was about to get worse.

Death Eater attacks were going to pick up and the Order would experience their first losses, the Prewett twins. Followed by the slow and methodical murders of the Bones family. Random disappearances would increase. Many people would die.

Her stomach twisted in on itself. Bile coated her tongue and her chest felt heavy.

She'd have to talk to Dumbledore as soon as possible.

What if the Prewetts were already meant to be dead?

Hermione swallowed thickly. Her panic built. How much had already been inadvertently altered? What had already been changed?

'Granger?' Wide eyes shot upwards. The Marauder met her stare before studying her face. 'Tell Dumbledore that you'll need a wand soon, cos I think shit's about to go from bad to worse.'

She gave him a shaky nod before opening the letter in her hand. Hermione saw the words but they didn't make sense. After reading the same line over and over again she gave up. When she looked up, she found Sirius frowning at the potions before him. They were bubbling, two were now useless and still he didn't react.

'Sirius?'

He jumped, startled and she nearly flinched when wild eyes turned to her. The end of his wand aimed at her heart. It was odd. She was scared at having a wand trained at her, but she wasn't worried about him hurting her. Not anymore.

Realisation was slow to come but she saw it in his eyes when his actions registered. Sirius clenched his jaw and grey eyes grew wider still as he lowered his wand. He opened his mouth to say something but she shook her head, cutting him off.

He was trembling and his breathing was ragged. Hermione itched to say something. To comfort him and fix whatever was going on. She didn't understand the need or the pull but it floored her with its intensity.

It was a startling realisation that shook her to her core, but it was nonetheless true: she wanted to protect him. Soothe him- take away the pain she saw behind his eyes.

But she couldn't do that.

It'd cross some invisible boundary between them and she doubted it'd be welcomed.

Hermione looked away first, blinking as his gaze continued to burn through her. An odd tension in the air, electrifying the space between them.

'Hermione?'

His voice was hoarse but he spoke soft and low. Her resolve softened and she frowned up at him, waiting for him to speak but he said nothing else. He simply stared.

She shook her head, looking away. A crooked smile on her lips, forced as the tension turned awkward.

Again, she was the first to break the silence. 'The potions aren't good anymore.'

Sirius nodded, blinking away whatever it was that had just happened and turning to stare at the bubbling cauldrons. A flick of his wand and the potions vanished.

Hermione licked her lips, shifting in her seat.

'I think that's enough for today,' she said. It was only half five but already it felt like too long a day.

Sirius nodded but didn't say anything else.

The walk back to Batty's was a slow and unrushed affair. Their feet dragged and neither spoke until they bid each other a good night.

'Alright?' asked Batty as they met on the stairs.

Hermione nodded. 'Yeah. Just tired.'

The older witch nodded but didn't press and Hermione was beyond grateful for it. She lay in bed and shut her eyes, Sirius at the forefront of her mind.

Something was going on and it was clearly gutting him. She knew it wasn't to do with her, he'd promised. The only possible answer was the war. The way he'd shut down spoke volumes.

Her belly cramped and she clutched at her mid-section. It was nearing her time of the month but she doubted this had anything to do with that. She was on edge- anxious and she knew it.

Another cramp and Hermione's eyes shot open and she sat up, leant against her headboard. Brown eyes followed Sirius' pacing feet as wisps of smoke trailed after him, his words echoing in her head.

Shit's going to go from bad to worse.

How did he know? Did he sense it? Or did he feel it? Was it that same nervous energy which had driven him to come out of hiding during fourth year and run to the aide of Harry? She didn't know what drove him, but she understood that impulse to protect.

She wanted to protect him... and that fact was a bit unsettling. The last time she'd felt that particular urge had been with Harry and Ron. Now she was feeling it towards Sirius Black. It was surreal.

Hermione looked away from the window, her eyes automatically drifting over to her calendar. It was the tenth of September. Soon it would be her birthday and though she'd thought nothing of it at first, as the days grew closer to the date her mind had begun working overtime.

She'd read Croaker's diary several times over and nothing had hinted or alluded to the fact that there was a cause for concern. There'd been no mentions of paradoxes or possible complications of having two versions of her co-existing. Whether it meant nothing or something, she didn't know but the doubt was building.

Her belly cramped again.

The war would spike soon- perhaps today had been the beginning. The Prewetts would have to die. If Dumbledore didn't change his mind, their sacrifice would be needed. She'd also need a wand if that were the case- or at least she would if she didn't fade away on her birth date.

Her mind was on overload and she wanted to scream and shout the further her thoughts drifted.

Everything came back to her.

If she hadn't been so damn stupid, this wouldn't have happened. If she'd paid more attention, then she could've avoided the Prewetts getting more involved than necessary. If she'd tried a bit harder then maybe her magic would've been under control by now.

If, if, if.

That's what her existence consisted of now. Countless scenarios that could amount to nothing in the end because with her here, the future was uncertain.

Even her facts were backed by dangerous consequences.

Yes she could change everything but it didn't guarantee that it'd be for the best. She wasn't Harry, who'd been prophesied to win. As much as she liked to believe that she alone could manage it all, it was a stupid dream.

Harry Potter had been the Chosen One and as ridiculous as the thought of putting stock in prophecies was, it was why he'd won.

It had been Harry who had received the secret lessons from the most powerful wizard of their time. Harry who'd been prepared to fight the most dangerous dark lord in recent history, Harry who had led them and even when they'd all doubted him, Harry who'd had the nerve to hold true to what he knew was right. He had even been right about Malfoy when she'd called him paranoid.

Hermione Granger had been his smart sidekick. To consider herself as the hero of the story was idiotic and nothing more than wishful thinking.

Brown eyes stared at the number nineteen, before looking away. She could fade into the void for all she knew and this, all of this, would be pointless.

Regardless of her indecision, the war would still reach its peak and she was powerless to stop it.

Hermione shut her eyes as her gut ached.

Sirius had been awake when Remus creeped into James' room.

A sleeping Evans cuddled beside him as he followed the werewolf's form in the darkness. He gently laid her aside before standing and reaching for his shirt. A nod and the pair of them made it across the hall into his room. The second the door was shut, Remus started in on him.

'What the fuck is going on?'

Sirius shook his head. 'I don't know.'

'How long?'

He frowned. 'If we're counting from the end of his mission, close to two weeks. If we're counting from the moment he left, it's been about a month.'

Remus ran scarred hands down his face, before pushing back his fringe. He started pacing the length of the room and Sirius fought the urge to shout at him for it.

'What are we going to do about it?'

He didn't reply because he hated his answer. Remus caught on though and rounded on him.

'What the fuck is wrong with you? That's our best mate missing!'

He bit back the retort that burned to get out.

Remus had just gotten back. By the looks of him, he'd just walked in so the news was newly raw. Whereas he'd had a fortnight to deal with it.

A part of him envied the werewolf.

Remus rubbed at his eyes, before he started pacing again.

'Can you stand still?' he snapped and Moony rounded on him, getting in his face.

'Fuck off Sirius!'

He stood his ground, glaring at the idiot. Unflinching eyes focused on the amber ones of his friend.

Remus' eyes flashed with thinly veiled anger. 'We have to do something.'

'Like what?!' he snapped. 'It's been weeks. No one knows anything. Mr Potter couldn't get shit out of Dumbledore. Mrs Potter couldn't get answers out of Dumbledore. What the fuck was I supposed to do?'

'You should've looked for him!'

'I couldn't,' he snarled, eyes blazing. 'I had my own mission.'

'You were here and you knew he was missing, you could've searched for him... Did you even try?!'

His gut ached and his chest heaved.

No. He hadn't.

He'd done as the Potters had asked and let them handle it. It'd been hard and all throughout he'd hated himself for being so damn passive and doing nothing, but they'd asked him to leave it and he'd relented. Now here he was, at the end of his best mate's glare as he said the very things he'd been thinking.

'You should've done more.'

Remus' accusation slammed into him, blood rushed in his ears and his throat burned.

He was right. He should have.

Remus stared him down before he began pacing again. His long strides pointless, his anger useless.

'I should've been here,' he muttered, fists clenched.

'It wouldn't have made a difference.'

'I would've fucking tried' shouted Remus, rounding on him. 'I wouldn't have sat on my arse like you!'

'Fuck you Remus! I did what I promised I'd do, which was more than you!'

Amber eyes flashed as the werewolf stalked towards him as his rage filled the room. The look on Remus' face sent chills down his spine and put him on edge, but he didn't react.

This was Remus and he'd just found out James was missing. He was scared and whenever Moony was scared, he lashed out.

The tall Marauder reached him and punched the wall near his head.

The wall behind him shook. He heard debris clutter to the floor when Remus moved his hand back, breathing heavily.

They glared at each other and he was the first to look away. Sirius shook his head as Moony stepped away, bed creaking as he sat on it.

'Where's Pete?'

'I don't know.'

'And Lily?'

He sighed. 'She hardly eats. She's taken a few missions but Moody hasn't given her anything serious.'

It was a non-answer and they both knew it. Truth was, Evans was doing just as well as him. Perhaps even worse. Knowing Remus, he suspected as much.

Moony nodded and said nothing else.

Companionable silence built between them, each stuck in their own head. Before he knew it, the sun had rose and he stood with aching legs and hot, scratchy eyes.

'I've got to go.'

Remus blinked up at him, watching as he pushed his chair back under the desk. 'How's Hermione?'

He shrugged. 'She's alright.'

'I'll ask for easy missions and help you with Lily.'

Sirius nodded, heading for the door. 'Sleep and shower mate. You look like shit and smell twice as bad.'

'And yet, I still look better than you.'

He flipped him off before walking out the door and heading upstairs to his room. The image that stared back at him looked worse than Remus had implied.

He couldn't sleep, he wasn't hungry and it showed.

His face was thinner and his eyes were dull. He looked shit and he knew it but he didn't care.

Within the hour, he was back in Godric's Hollow and waiting on Granger. The time passed in a daze. Their usual routine a monotonous distraction that served its purpose until Granger started her staring. He ignored it as he usually did but by midday he'd had enough. He snapped.

'Granger!'

The witch flinched, cheeks pink and eyes wide as she looked away from him.

'W-hat?' she stammered.

'Stop. Staring,' he growled at her.

'I'm not!' she defended, her cheeks flushing red hot. Grey eyes turned to slits as he glared at her.

'You are,' he spat. 'You always are.'

The witch shook her head, hair bouncing, not looking up at him. 'I wasn't staring.'

He bit back his retort because she was full of shit and they both bloody well knew it.

Sirius had caught her watching him a few times now. He'd thought he was imagining it at first but as the days passed, he'd come to realise that it wasn't all in his head. Granger had developed a staring problem and it'd gotten old fast.

He glared at her as she hastily opened a letter and began to read, her face hidden by her bushy hair. He flicked a hand at the radio and only looked away once the music began to play.

Before long she was staring again.

'Granger,' he snarled, eyes snapping to her. 'Stop it!'

Unfortunately for her, he'd caught her in the act so she had no excuse this time.

Her mouth opened and shut as her blush spread down her neck and chest. He followed its path before quickly looking away. He shook his head, glaring at her.

'What the fuck is your problem?'

She didn't answer him and his anger flared.

'Answer me!' he demanded, slamming a fist against the table and making her flinch.

'I wasn't staring,' she said, weary eyes watching him. 'And stop yelling at me.'

He ignored her. 'You were. I saw you.'

Granger shook her head again as he stared her down. 'I wasn't-'

'You were. Stop fucking lying!'

'I'm lying?' she snapped. 'All you've done these past few days is lie! Telling me nothing is wrong but looking like everything is.'

'Shut the fuck up Granger.'

'No,' she spat. 'You're lying about something and I don't like it.'

He sneered. 'Doesn't feel good does it?'

She blinked and didn't move, face stoic as he sniffed and returned to his potions.

His anger didn't ebb- it fuelled his annoyance and spiked his frustrations. He slammed down the vial he'd been holding, groaning when it shattered and shards of glass embedded themselves into his flesh.

His hand shook and trembled and all he saw was red. Blood pooled on his palm and dripped down his fingers, staining the work table before him.

Blood. Pain. A wall. Running. James is missing.

He took in ragged breaths as he reached for his wand. Wide eyes stared at his wounded fingers, mind drawing a blank as thin, spiderlike streams of blood ran down his hand.

He swallowed thickly, chest aching, head throbbing- small hands reached out to him and he blinked up at Granger. Her lips moved, he saw them move but... he didn't understand.

Grey eyes returned to his injured hand, to his wand- trying to think.

'-ius...?'

He frowned at the trail of blood that'd run down his wrist.

A smaller hand encircled his own. His wand slipped through his grip and moved before him, over his hand.

Warmth spread through his fingers, tingling rippled vibrated across his palm and he blinked as the blood vanished.

Grey eyes looked up and he swallowed thickly a Granger's presence registered. She was stood before him, looking up at him. Brown eyes, wide as her lips parted and studied his face.

He shook his head and opened his mouth, but words failed him the second she moved.

Granger's arms went around him and his breath hitched.

He blinked, frowning down at the witch pressed against him. Slender arms around his waist, her face against his chest, head under his chin. Her scent filling him.

'Granger,' he muttered and the witch shook her head.

He wanted to ask her what she was doing and why, but the words didn't reach his lips. He should've pushed her away but he didn't.

Sirius shut his eyes and inhaled slowly, deeply. His shoulders dropped, his racing heart slowed and all he was aware of was Granger.

Her heat against his body. Her soft curves. Her gentle presence. His whole focus was her.

He hesitated before lifting his arms. Sirius swallowed thickly as he pulled her against him and thought twice before resting his chin on her head. His eyes fell shut and he breathed in deeply as she snuggled in, taking comfort in her embrace.