"I'll do fine without—whoa!" Bilbo silenced, scowling on top of the pony. He sneezed and pressed his handkerchief to his nose. Dwalin rolled his eyes, earning a glare from Balin.
"Try being a little sympathetic to the lad."
"I am being plenty sympathetic."
"Be more sympathetic than usual, then. He's your husband, for goodness sakes, Dwalin! At least act like it!" The ease Balin had with throwing the word "husband" left Dwalin scowling worse than before.
Bilbo continued to sneeze through the day. It was truly miserable to behold. His nose had inflamed before the night's end. He spoke with Oin that night on what could be done about his allergies, enunciating more than needed due to the nasal congestion messing with his voice.
Dwalin watched from his place by the fire, an empty bowl in hand.
"How are you feeling?" Dwalin arched an eyebrow at Thorin. Thorin shrugged. "Forget I asked."
"I will." Thorin may not have seemed it to anyone else, but Dwalin knew him long enough to know when there was mirth in his eyes. Right now, Thorin was laughing. His mouth curved in a smirk and his eyes were alight.
Fili and Kili tackled Bilbo, who screamed.
"Shouldn't you go defend him?" Thorin asked.
"He'll be fine from whatever mischief they try."
Thorin frowned. "Are you sure you're all right with this…setup?"
"No. I'm not, but he made his choice and that choice was me. I'm doubting. It's only expected given the swiftness of everything."
"True. But you're still honor bound—"
"If he was in any real danger, then I'd be there."
Thorin snorted. "I love my sister-sons, but I do consider them real trouble, Dwalin."
"He's holding fine on his own. See." Bilbo chased Fili and Kili around the campsite, yelling at them in Hobbitish…or whatever he calls his native language. "No need for me to get in the middle of it all. We aren't going to run into trolls, orcs, goblins, or spiders, Thorin. The greatest danger we'll have on the road is Elves."
"Don't remind me," Thorin growled, standing and walking toward his nephews and Bilbo. "Fili! Kili! Leave our Burglar in peace, or so help me…"
Bilbo slipped away and circled around back to the fire.
"Feeling all right, Brother?" Balin asked, clapping Bilbo's back. His nose was still inflamed. But he nodded.
"Fili and Kili are bore rang-bunk-jus fan I fought. Fat's all." He held up a steaming mug and drank. "Oin was ferry helvful dough. He said I should be breeding better in a couple ov days."
Dwalin covered a laugh with a cough.
"Good. Good," Balin said, patting Bilbo's head. "Isn't it, Dwalin?"
Dwalin didn't trust himself to speak, so he nodded his affirmation instead. After feeling composed enough, he stood. "I've first watch. Sleep well, Brother. Bilbo."
Bilbo nodded.
Balin furrowed his brow. You said let him choose. Not his fault you're the unwilling party, his gaze seemed to say. And perhaps that was exactly what Balin was thinking at Dwalin. And he could have said, "No."
#
Dwalin wished there was something to distract him on watch. The night hours were long and nothing save the sounds of his companion's snoring (be they light or heavy) were in the air. Well, not entirely, if the owl's call had to say anything about it. He didn't dislike Bilbo. The little one is annoying, but he wasn't intentionally so. Dwalin couldn't fault the Hobbit that.
You said let him choose. Not his fault you're the unwilling party.
Unwilling, huh? He hadn't thought of that when he suggested letting Bilbo choose who to marry. Still, he wasn't thinking about the Dwarf who would be chosen. He especially didn't think it'd be him.
Like the others, he thought he'd choose Fili or Bofur or Dori. Aule's Beard, even Nori and Thorin were up for grabs! True, he and Thorin were the same age and he was available too…
He didn't think, even once, that Bilbo Baggins, their amateur burglar and Hobbit, would choose him. He gave his reasons. Dwalin took his opinion into consideration and based his opinion as a spouse based on that?
Did the Hobbit know anything about Dwarves? Did he know that Dwarves were a jealous group? Did he know that he had, in a way, tied himself to one of the gruffest, meanest, strongest warriors of their age?
Did Bilbo know anything beyond his home?
Dwalin had not been jesting when he doubted Bilbo's abilities earlier that night.
Everyone who spoke against his going had, in some way, grown attached to the fussy little hobbit in those few short hours. And still Bilbo had insisted on going.
Dwalin wondered if he was touched in the head.
You accepted his proposal. You didn't have to.
Dwalin rubbed his hands over his bald head, growling.
"Something bothering you?"
Dwalin reached for his ax, turning around to the speaker. He paused and lowered his hand. Bilbo stood at the base of the rock Dwalin sat on, wrapped in a fur blanket.
"No," he lied. Bilbo tilted his head to the side. His hair moved with him and Dwalin could note the pointed ear was slightly larger than an elf's.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Okay. May I join you? I can't sleep."
"Sure."
And that was the extent of their conversation.
Bilbo climbed on the rock, adjusting the blanket as he could and sat beside Dwalin. He pulled the pelt over his head to keep it warm.
"Why couldn't you sleep?"
"Balin snores."
"Ah."
Conversation two: done.
Dwalin slouched, wishing there was more he could say to Bilbo. The fact was, he had nothing to ask him, nothing to talk about, and nothing that remotely interested him about his…husband.
"Why did you decide to go on this adventure?" Bilbo asked, looking at him.
"Thorin and I grew up together and he is my king. Balin came for the same reason: he used to watch us when our parents couldn't. We are here out of loyalty to Thorin."
"And the law that one must never travel without family?"
"An old law and one that every Dwarf you meet adheres to. You never travel alone and you cannot guarantee that a friend will watch your back. Family, however, will always have your back."
"I guess that makes sense. But Thorin is traveling alone."
Dwalin smirked. "Fili and Kili are his sister-sons."
Bilbo spun around to look at the camp. "I never would have guessed," he said. "They are nothing like Thorin."
"They are a lot like Thorin. He just got old. Why did you want to come? Not out of loyalty to anyone here, surely."
"No. Lack of contentment is my motivator," Bilbo said. "I was outside having a smoke when Gandalf came. I was a little surprised at first, but then I thought about it and I could only say, 'Well, why not? The Shire is grand and all, but dreadfully dull once you get to the bones of it.' I never have been quite…content with my life there. It was proper by Hobbit standards, but to me I wanted—needed something more. This adventure, I hope will do that."
"You aren't afraid?"
"No. I'm terrified," Bilbo said, smiling. "But I'm not going to let it get to me. I can't. I needed out. Now I'm out. For which, I have to thank you. I understand if you want to terminate our union once the quest is over. I don't expect our current arrangement to be permanent."
Dwalin blinked. Terminate? Marriages could be terminated? This was as unusual as the way they had married! Most Dwarves married their One, so a marriage terminated was almost unheard of—
"Dwarves don't value divorce, do they?"
"It's never been done as far as I've been alive. Or if it has, I've never heard tell and it would be talked about."
"Dwarves are as gossipy as Hobbits then?"
"I doubt that. Too much work t'do to bother, but somethin' like that would be talked about, I bet."
"You slur when you're nervous," Bilbo noted.
"No. I don't."
Rather it was the opposite. When he was comfortable he let his speech slide to a slur. Balin and Thorin both used to tease him for it. Not anymore, though Fili and Kili did wonderful impersonations.
Bilbo shrugged, deeming it wise not to press the issue.
Conversation three: check.
"Not interrupting anything, am I?" Bofur asked, approaching. He yawned, scratching his belly.
"No," Dwalin said, standing. He looked at Bilbo. "Coming?"
"Oh. Yes." Bilbo slide off and followed Dwalin, still wrapped in the blanket like a bread roll. Bofur grinned at them, wagging his eyebrows. Dwalin sneered at him and he scrambled on to the rock, not implying anything more.
Dwalin turned to Bilbo. "Fair warning: I snore too. Best get used to it."
"Okay," Bilbo replied.