Hello All!

So sorry for the long time between updates. Sadly RL is a b*tch. Both my coauthor and I have been feeling the drag. I can't make any promises, but I haven't stopped making notes about my fics in my journal everyday. I can say I'm committed to these fics even if it takes time.

I'd like to thank everyone who voted in the poll on my profile. As always I take all suggests seriously. I tried to add a bit of everything into this chapter. I appreciate any and all reviews. I may update the poll with a new question.

I am so glad there are still people who read my fics, post reviews, set alerts, and add these stories to their favorite lists. It makes me smile even when I'm having a long, bad day.

*enjoy!*

[one more note at the bottom]

Previously

"Go, sit by the bank. I don't want you watching the prices...Now!" He commanded when I hesitated. I walked past the cashier and sat down on the bench by the bank. This night hadn't been that bad and I got all my food. I was happy.

I relaxed a bit and closed my eyes. I was still adjusting to being up all night. I hadn't worked out all the kinks. Eric touched my shoulder and jolted me back to the present. "Let's get home."

We walked to the car and I tried to help with putting the bags in the trunk, but Eric waved me off and told me to get in the car. I didn't argue because I was still sleepy. I pulled on my seatbelt for extra safety and laid my head back. I opened my eyes when Eric appeared beside me, firing up the engine.

"Rest. We'll be home soon." He said kindly.

I nodded and fell asleep. It would be a nice little cat nap before we got home and talked about what came up at the store. And did god knows what...

I felt like I was being jolted and moved around, but couldn't figure out why. I think I was in the car. Maybe. It would make sense that I was in the car and moving. If only my eyes would open I could see where I was.

I started to go downwards and landed somewhere soft. My eyes finally opened to see Eric above me.

"Go back to sleep."

He sped off at vampire speed. He must have carried me from the car to the bed. I let my eyes shut again, or they shut of their own accord, either way. I didn't let myself fall into a deep sleep, I wanted to get up and be with Eric when he came back.

He came back soon and I was still half asleep.

"Hey, sorry I fell asleep," I mumbled and yawned

While we lived together, Eric still spent a great deal of time dead as a doornail. I valued our nights together. I began to notice it wasn't just how much I loved him; It wasn't just the left-over feelings I had from my assault, or attempted assault - he did physically hurt me, but not sexually - from Merlottes, but it was the power I had given him that left me feeling a little shaken. It made me want to reach out to him and gain reassurance. It made me crave his affection and tenderness; to reinforce the feeling that no matter what he could* do, he wouldn't harm me. In short, I was needy and Eric didn't seem the least bit bothered by it.

He crawled into bed with me and wrapped his arms around me. I sighed, feeling content.

"Thank you for taking me."

"You don't have to thank me for taking care of you. That's a given," he said, and kissed my forehead.

I relaxed against him. I could give into my lazy side and not work - it wouldn't be overly hard to do so. I had a penchant for slothfulness sometimes. I still felt a bit weird with being completely financially dependent on him. I had had partners do the majority of spending money before, because I was in school full-time and not working, but I'd had help from my family. But now, I lived with Eric. I didn't work. He was going to pay my tuition. He provided me with food, clothing, and shelter. This was certainly an adjustment. Eric hadn't done anything too physically kinky to me and I was already having to make changes. I'd thought the physical parts of our relationship would be the hardest, but they were slow coming; I hadn't even been truly punished yet. The lifestyle changes and the emotional parts of this relationship were hard on me. Maybe the hardest thing.

"What are you thinking?" Eric interrupted my thoughts

"Life….us… okay, the money thing." I decided to be semi-honest. I was still bothered by the fact that I had no income and Eric was covering everything. There was no point to bring up my issues with our relationship- I would just have to wait and work on my training.

"We're bonded. We are beyond financial issues."

He said this with such certainty that I nodded my head. I immediately thought about this and paused. Were we married or something?

"Dina, it's my job to care for you. Allow me to do it in peace."

"Fine. But you don't have to be extravagant. When have I ever gone after your money?" We both knew he had a lot of it.

"You have not. But you will have excellence in everything. I will not settle, for you or for myself. You will never again have only the basic of anything."

"But…" I started to say.

"This is non-negotiable. Now, we have plans to make for your day."

I was sufficiently silenced. He pulled me up and led me to the living room. I followed, mentally preparing myself to absorb whatever information he gave me. I didn't think I'd ever get anywhere with the money thing and decided to drop it. For now.

"Your stylist is coming tomorrow. I'm going to give you a code for leaving and coming back to our living space. It will only last between noon and 5pm, so you need to be on time. I'll write down the code and leave it on the table for you before dawn."

He paused and looked at me. I nodded. I had to be on time. I was good at being punctual.

"Bobby will be waiting in the living room upstairs. He'll escort you to the room where your stylist will work. It's the same one that Dr. Ludwig used."

Oh, fucking great. I don't know what was worse: that asshole Bobby Burnham or the memories I had of that room. Not to mention the idea of an 'escort'. First I can't leave the house because I'm being trained and now I can't even be alone in the house. The physical parts of this whole D/s thing were nowhere near as significant as everything else. I was sure of it.

"What's wrong?" He looked at me, his brow raised.

I kept forgetting how well he felt me – and how it was hard for me to feel him unless he was feeling something intense or I really concentrated. It was unnerving to think about. I couldn't imagine anything more private than my emotions and Eric had an Access All Areas pass to them at any given time. I was really starting to feel shaken about this when he started to rub my back.

"Calm down …You'll get used to being this tightly bound to me. You'll learn to love it….Now, tell me what upset you."

I almost wanted to scoff at the idea that I'd love Eric being in my head, but restrained myself. He knew I didn't believe him, but said nothing. At least he was polite about our bond.

"I don't like having a babysitter." I decided to not explain that I hated Bobby. I wasn't going to overreact and get someone fired because I didn't like them. He hadn't done anything horrible and he was utterly devoted to Eric.

"I can't say there will ever be a time when you will be on your own again," he began and I gasped. I'd thought this was only a part of training. "Even after you are trained, I won't have you spending too much time away from me. And with your penchant for getting into trouble, I will be insisting on some form of security."

I tried to form words. I couldn't exactly deny that, from the first time I met Eric, I had found myself in some rather dangerous situations. But nothing warranted security. My thoughts were interrupted by my vampire.

"Dina, I see you trying to form an argument. Please save your breath. Your safety is my responsibility. I won't budge."

I think it was scary how he managed to sound so calm while he was making choices for my life, regardless of how I felt.

"These changes seem like a lot because they are new. But most will be gradual, and so much a part of your everyday life that you won't even notice how different your life is now from the one you had."

The life I had. Everything from my last moment at Merlottes was part of a life that no longer existed. I was Eric's Bonded. I wasn't a waitress; I wasn't a student (I'd never primarily be one again, either); I wasn't even a friend or a girl with family. I only had others when Eric allowed me to contact them. I couldn't believe I was close to meltdown again. I was on a rollercoaster…

"You will journal about this as soon as you have time. Get everything out and bring your concerns to me. Dawn is too close and I need you now."

I looked in his eyes and nodded. Later. Tomorrow. Soon. I needed to be with him right now and get ready for tomorrow. I took some deep breaths and tried to calm my mind.

Eric reiterated his information on the security system. I had to leave and be back on time. The doors wouldn't open if I was late or too early when leaving. He wouldn't be pleased if I found myself locked out from our daytime living space. No one knew this code and I should keep it that way. He asked if I understood, and I nodded.

He then went on to tell me to not eat tomorrow until he rose. He also said my outfit would be simple. I raised an eyebrow. I wasn't going to leave this room dressed in the typical outfits Eric left for me. He gave me an exasperated look and told me I'd wear a simple dress I could slip on and off. I felt a little embarrassed. I knew better than to think Eric would allow anyone else to see me unclothed. Or any other males shall I say.

I asked if I could get a snack now and he told me to keep it small.

I hopped up and headed to the kitchenette. I didn't see any bags on the counter so I guessed Eric had put everything away. I actually didn't see any food on the table except for my loaf of bread. I opened up the fridge and started laughing. Every shelf was crammed with food. But in Eric's defense, my family-sized cereal took up a lot of room. Did I mention he put dry cereal in the refrigerator?

I busted out laughing and felt Eric's fingers on the fridge door. I stopped laughing. I hated it when he did that vampire sneak-up thing.

"What's so funny?" He looked confused.

"Cereal doesn't need to be refrigerated."

He gave me a blank look.

"Half of these things can go in the cabinets."

"Dina, humans need their food kept properly cold. They get sick if it is not." He said this with perfect confidence and conviction. I was fairly sure he had read it almost verbatim from a website.

"True, but some foods have preservatives and don't need the cold to preserve them. Didn't you ever take a peek around my kitchen?" I honestly couldn't remember if he had gone in there at all.

"I will once again allow you to pull things from the ice box and put them in the cabinets as you see fit. But I will be double-checking this and will be displeased if you make yourself sick in any way or risk your health."

With this he left the room. Eric could never seem to end a conversation without having the last word. It took me a few minutes to get everything put away. Eric had nothing in the cabinets so I had a lot of room to work with. I also noted he only had a handful of utensils and only one pan and one pot. I decided I'd have to ask him to get more. I had used more than one pot at a time before, so I considered this to be necessity and not a luxury. Although, I realized I would be the only one using the forks and spoons and I wouldn't be cooking for anyone else anytime soon. I was done putting things away before I decided if I really needed more kitchen supplies or not. I made myself a small turkey sandwich and went into the living room. Eric was sitting on the couch with the TV on softly, texting.

Eric's POV

My human had fallen back to sleep almost as soon as I put the key in the ignition. I drove quite slowly so I wouldn't have to brake too hard and wake her. She is entirely too distrustful of my driving capabilities.

I could feel her exhaustion. It was more than a need for sleep. She had been through quite a bit. Two threatening encounters in one week was a lot for a mortal to handle. Not to mention our relationship, and the dramatic changes she had begun making.

I wasn't quite sure where I got all my newfound patience from. Perhaps it was her blood, calming me. Granted it had been years since my food had been scarce, but I couldn't remember the last time I had 24/7 availability for feeding. It might have been our blood-sharing that enabled me to feel her emotions. I was literally empathetic to her. Or, of course, it could have been her love.

Pam's love was not as intense as Dina's. I had never bonded with a human so I couldn't say for certain why this was. It could be her human state versus Pam being a vampire. Pam might just run a bit colder than most or Dina might just love stronger because of who she is. Either way, I wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I had her love and I was going to keep it.

I don't think she understood the changes I was making to my own lifestyle. I'm sure she'd feel they paled in comparison to what I asked of her. My home was never set up for humans. The upstairs looked fairly normal during the day and could be sold to a human buyer. I'd never actually used the oven or other appliances but had them tested yearly. I had the small kitchen down here more for an emergency when I might have to take a human down here with me for a period of time. I'd then probably drain them since they saw where I slept during the day. I never thought I'd have a human living with me here. I realized that the place wasn't quite as ready for her as I had hoped when she pointed out the lack of lighting. She had never been upstairs at night, but would probably find many rooms and parts of the hallway to be too dark for her to see adequately. Bobby was going to have a lot of work ahead of him.

I had truly hoped my lair would be enough for us. I hadn't gone through all of her stuff, but doubted most of it would fit down here. I was also noticing it was hard to fit all of her food into the refrigerator. I hoped she knew I'd get her more and she didn't have to stock up. I began to wonder if the appliances down here were too small. Caring for my very own human was a far harder task than I ever assumed it would be.

Overall, I think things were working out well. I found myself so pleased with her I couldn't help but be gentler and more forgiving when she made small slip-ups. I knew eventually she'd do something I couldn't ignore without punishment. I wondered how she'd react after we finally went through her belongings and I showed her what she would keep and what she would discard. At least everything she lost would be replaced. I already had enough furniture for both of us and actually enjoyed buying her clothes. I'd always let Pam get her own things using my money. I had made all of the purchases for Dina in full, from picking them out to arranging for the shipping. Then I got to see her wear them. It was a very satisfying process.

I finally got all the food put away and pushed the door shut. This time it didn't wedge or reopen. I was going to go see how my little one was doing when I felt my phone vibrate. Pam sent me a text updating me on the bar, my businesses, and a special project I'd given her. I wasn't happy by any means that Dina had been attacked, yet her attack facilitated the inevitable conversation and decision she had to make about our relationship. Perhaps everything happened for a reason. Nonetheless, an attack on my bonded couldn't go unpunished; even if our true relationship didn't begin until after it occurred.

I had decided I wouldn't lie to her, but that didn't mean I'd tell her everything.

Of course, a joke wasn't a lie. I knew she believed I'd leash her in the store tonight. I wouldn't have done something so harsh over something so small. She made it too easy to resist. My Dina was a prideful little thing and wouldn't quickly get over any humiliation. Consequently, I wouldn't embarrass her unless her infraction was large enough to warrant it. I would never forget that it would always be better to punish her now, than have her act badly in public and be punished then. My world was cutthroat, but I knew she could handle it and I could provide her enough happiness to make up for it.

I texted Pam back and told her that if she was ready I could come to the bar for most of tomorrow night. A part of me wondered if I was taking too great a risk in killing this human. He would be missed and was a known bigot against my kind. But the other part of me remembered her fear. My instincts and my principles, stating that anyone who touches what is mine should die, were secondary to the memory of the panic. I felt her terror and it spread through my blood and clouded my head. Instead of dying down and instead of my being able to push it down, it grew larger and larger. I realized I myself was petrified. I realized how fragile she was. I learned the extent of the hold she had over me. I actually cared about her feelings and actions. It did irritate me, but it also proved that if she was taken from me I would be affected.

I wanted her close to me for many reasons. I had always wanted to dominate her. I wanted her as my sub. I wanted her like this not only sexually, but all the time. It was a satisfying and harmonious union this way. But I always knew she was safe this way as well. Having her mortality become so real was making me feel like keeping her right at my side or safely in our impenetrable home. She was clinging tightly to me due to her unease over becoming mine in every sense of the word, but I was desperately holding on to her as well. I don't think she realized how deep my feelings on the matter ran.

I also wanted her close so I could savor her love. I wanted to be greedy and keep it all to myself. I wanted to become her sun and stars. I was trying to avoid the time when I'd have to share her with the world once more.

But for now I'd have her all to myself and I was going to enjoy it.

Dina's POV

I sat beside him and began to eat. He didn't look up from his phone and told me, "Give me a few minutes, this is important."

I nodded and kept eating. I tried to catch some of the news, but the volume was too low on the TV. I guess between his vampire hearing and his important messages Eric had turned it way down. I tried to read the crawl, but the darn font was too tiny and moving too fast. I knew they kept the important stories at the bottom.

I was much calmer now and waited patiently for my vampire sheriff to finish his work.

I had already finished eating and tossed the plate aside by the time he put his phone down. He looked at me with a seriousness that was unnerving. I had yet to really get used to his feelings and our bond. I tried to sort them out, but came up with little.

"I'm going to have to put in some hours at the bar ; something has come up."

"Not on your throne? Other hours? Is everything alright?" I spit out my questions as my mind worked though all the possibilities.

He put his hand on my arm. "Yes, another type of hours. Nothing is wrong, but there are things that are time-sensitive. Everything is fine. I want you to stay here."

I truly didn't like being left here alone. He leaned in and cupped my face. His lips were soft and cold against mine.

"You'll be fine. Come, I want to share blood and enjoy your body."

I didn't have to be asked twice.

Eric never tired. We kept going over and over. This was why I was going to be forever soured for other men: the mind-blowing sex I was having with Eric was becoming an everyday thing. I was beginning to expect this amazing sex. I was setting records for how often I came. Soon, the same thing that happened when I first came here occurred again. I began to feel dry and Eric's thrusts became painful. This time something in me just wanted him to stop. I didn't want to experience pain for his pleasure. I didn't want to trust him to know when enough was enough. I wasn't feeling rebellious or angry, just uninterested in the trial.

I was also curious what Eric would do if I voiced these concerns. I knew I could come to him with anything, but I was also supposed to trust him. I was going to let my curiosity get the better of me.

"Eric…..I need more lube." I huffed out, while he kept thrusting.

He didn't slow his pace as he replied, "do you?"

He slammed all the way into me and I grunted hard. I reflexively launched forward, but he held my hips. "Hmmm." He acted like he was deeply considering my statement, but I could tell he was amused and very aroused. He slowly pulled out of me, until only his tip was still in. He then pushed back in, just as slowly. I gasped and dug my nails into the bed.

"You feel fine to me." He gently moved his hips against mine and I quietly moaned from the discomfort. This continued for a few minutes and I began getting increasingly bothered by it. I was also feeling like I had my answer: Eric would deny my request, but not be angry with me.

He stopped moving. "Alright, I guess if you think you need it."

He dislodged himself and grabbed the ring on the center of my collar and began to tug me around. I ended up facing him, sitting on my bottom and leaning on my hands. He knelt in front of me. "Open," he commanded and pushed his cock to my lips. I briefly hesitated before taking him into my mouth. I twirled my tongue and moved against his frenulum. He began to push and I opened wide for him. I was learning what he wanted and responding accordingly. I wasn't overly bothered by this.

He began to press against the back of my throat and when I made a noise of protest he hooked his middle finger around my collar. "Come on, you said you needed lube; you're not even trying."

He thrust again into my mouth and I salivated around him. I realized that I was going to provide the lube I'd asked for. I began to accept his dick ramming into my throat because it covered him (and my chin) in lubricant. His reentry would be easy at this rate. The sensation was strange and slightly uncomfortable, but I wasn't afraid. Eric was careful with me.

Within a few moments, he pulled out and flipped me over. He dragged my body up and mounted me. He was slick and began to pound me once more. I moaned with pleasure. We moved in a frenzy until we both found our releases. After I regained my regular breathing pattern I found myself in his arms, leaning against the headboard.

His fingers were gentle as they roamed over my arms. Our lips found each other. His hand inched up to my collar and then he pushed my head forward. I didn't quite know what to do. I still didn't know what to feel about my collar. I felt and heard him undo the clasp. I didn't know if I should feel naked or liberated.

He set my collar on the bed and began to massage my throat. It was highly personal and instinctively scary to have someone hold my throat in their hand, but I was unafraid. My skin was sensitive after being bound in leather for so long.

"You're mine." Eric broke me from my thoughts. He pulled my head against his shoulder and I looked at him. He put his wrist to his mouth and clicked his fangs out. As soon as the bite was made it was being pressed against my own lips. I supposed he was ensuring he didn't leave any damage. As sweet as he tasted, I was ready to stop before he was. He didn't seem aroused like he normally was when he fed me his blood.

"No, I want you to have more." He re-bit open the wound and I winced at causing him more pain.

He pressed it to my lips and held it firmly. I kept drinking and wondered when it would be enough. I think I was nervous because I didn't know why he wasn't loving this like he normally did. He pulled away and licked his wound clean. He held me tight and I was still confused.

"I should have healed you better last time."

I remembered Bill and Sookie calling. "We were interrupted. It's alright."

"No, it's not. It's my job to care for you. I shouldn't have let anything come between me and my responsibility to you. Its my job to correct you when you are wrong. And it's my job to correct myself when I'm wrong."

I realized how much Eric was taking on in that moment. He was caring for him and for me. He also took care of Pam. I was pretty sure he was financially providing for all three of us. He was also not allowing himself any forgiveness.

I stroked his cheek, "I'm not mad."

He caught my hand. "You entrusted me with your life ; there is no excuse. I won't let it happen again. Besides, I want to strengthen our bond."

He kissed my lips before I could respond. "You must sleep, lover. You can't afford to be late tomorrow."

And we were off to bed….

(A look at Bill and Sookie)

"She hasn't called. She hasn't even texted. She texts a few times a day," Sookie rambled to Bill.

"Sookie, I told you: We can't call again. We can not go there. She….she agreed to this." Bill's voice dropped. He doubted Dina understood all she agreed to when she moved in with Eric. She was surely learning about Eric's dark side and the consequences of making an agreement with him.

"It's not right! We can't just leave her!" Sookie began to rant, terrified for her friend.

"Sookie! Do you understand that we've already put her in danger?" Bill raised his voice.

"How?" she asked, stunned.

"Our last call angered Eric. Who do you think had to feel his rage?" Bill paused, letting the reality sink in. "She is the only one there and Eric has complete control over her. He can torture her, he can hurt her, he can humiliate her, and he can even kill her with no repercussions."

Sookie's mind churned with the possibilities. She felt sick. She wanted to suggest the police, but remembered everything illegal Eric has gotten away with. He could glamour his way out of everything. "What about other vampires? No one will think he is hurting your movement by harming a human?"

"No, She agreed to be his pet. How he rules her is completely up to him," Bill said solemnly.

A tear rolled Sookie's cheek. Bill pulled her into his arms, regretting having to expose her to this truth. "All we can do is wait. Maybe he'll let her call soon."

I recieved a review from someone who didn't leave me a return addy for a reply, so I wanted to make just a few notes. Very good points were brought up and I hope to touch on them more and more as the story progresses.

this story is slow moving due to personal issues in my and my coauthor's life. I tried to clear up a few things in this chapter and will use the other chapters that are small for some clarification.

I'm glad the reviewer pointed out that I have warnings listed - take them seriously.

Dina is a feminist. She thinks women and men are equal. Eric is a vampire. He cares more about "race" (human, vamp, were) than about sex/gender. He has a female queen and his child, Pam, is both his only progeny and his 2nd in command. He is not sexist or he would only serve in a state with a king and wouldn't let his child have such high rank since she's not a man. with these characters its less about what 'this woman will do for this man' and more what 'this individual will do for their lover'. and perhaps eric will learn that its less about 'this human will do for this vampire'

there are female doms. male subs. and switchs of all kind. eric happens to be predominatly heterosexual. Dina happens to be bisexual and in love with Eric.

this is very hard for Dina and her character developemnt is adjusting and not adjusing and adapting as tiem goes on. she isn't just all rainbows and butterflies. she is reacting bit by bit to a situation that is happening very quickly.

also, her panic attack wasn't really about the D/s. it was about the blood bond. I think the books made the transition to simple. one day you are alone in your head and the next you feel a vampire and he feels you. there are only a few moments in the books where sookie and eric really take time to adjust. (grantly she resents the bond and that is made clear, but some I always felt there was emotion lacking in the books). She and Eric do push the matter aside. but what else can they do? they have things on the agenda and the bond won't just fade away over night. she has all the time in the world to write, talk, and take the time to get used to them being conntected.

I'd like to thank everyone for reading and reviewing! peace!