Chapter Twenty-Eight
Hinata is pretty sure apologizing each time he speaks is not a way to allay suspicion, but he's not really concerned with that at the moment. All of his thoughts are revolving around Suga-san, the silver haired setter had insisted that he go to school, even when he winced visibly after each step he took. Suga's bag, which had been found tossed into the grass by Daichi's house, was now on his shoulder. "The least I can do." He insisted, for not protecting Suga, for not stopping the setter when he tried to leave. For getting involved with Grand King, for making Kuroo hurt him. No explanation was provided, even when he could feel both of the older boys staring at him in question.
"Can you get my phone, Hinata?" It's a quiet request, Suga had been speaking quietly all morning, and Hinata froze. He didn't have Suga's phone, and stared up at the taller boy with guilty tears in his eyes, about to apologize for not being able to accomplish this simple task after getting him injured. "I-" He mumbled, waiting for the silver haired boy to break down because he couldn't have his phone, because of the injuries, the trauma.
"It's in my bag." The bag on his shoulder. Hinata could accomplish his task, he pulled the older boy's school bag from his shoulder, carefully unzipped it as if the Suga-san had a connection with the material in his hands. His fingers trembled as he tugged on the device, silver like the older boy's hair, it gleamed orange under the morning sun. "H-here." Offered the phone with a quiet voice, but Suga just smiled at him. He tried not to let the affection hurt him, but Suga's curling lips twisted his guts painfully, offered another apology when the phone almost slipped from his clammy hand.
"Can you text my mother for me?" The twisted in his stomach yanked painfully on his insides at the boy's polite tone. I got your son attacked. He nodded, letting inky bangs fall into his face so he wouldn't have to look up into cautiously warm eyes. Hinata carefully flicked open the phone in his hands, carefully thumbed through Suga's contacts until Mom showed up. "N-N-What should it say?" He half begged, wondering if Suga would make him send a code to his mother. Make her call the police and send him to jail where he would rot forever.
"I stayed with Daichi-san, sorry for not calling, love you, mom." He carefully typed out the words, adding each polite ending and was about to press send when Daichi spoke up, a first since they had left the house. "Did you just type love you miss suga-san's mom?" He's not sure how either of the older boy's can laugh at a time like this, when one of them has been injured, as a message to him. Because they don't know. There's relief piling up with guilt in his stomach, it churns loudly that has Suga chuckling quietly, then grasping at his wounds. He apologizes for the noise.
"Didn't you eat breakfast, Shouyou?" He whimpers at the sound of his given name, coming from someone who had gotten hurt because of him. For him. The noise wasn't from hunger, but from guilt and shame and fear. Suga-san doesn't know, he reminds himself and the noise repeats. "I'll take that as a no." He doesn't respond, fixes the message to make it look like it had come from the older boy, claiming the mother as his own in polite Kanji. Pressing send makes his fingers tingle, wondering if Suga-san even typed in Kanji and dread starting filling his veins.
"Sorry." He mumbles towards the ground, tucking the device back into the older boy's bag and zipping it up carefully. "Daichi, will you buy Hinata breakfast?" His gut churns painfully at the request, wants to deny it because he's not sure if he'll ever need to eat again. Also wanting to obey Suga's every command until he's forgiven keeps his lips tight. This is your fault. A voice growls in his ear, spewing venom into his ears until he's actually shaking like a soaked dog. Suga-san will hate me if he knows, everyone will. The truth, he realizes also needs to come to light, but he can't make his lips into anything but frantic apologizes.
Why isn't he scared? He would be scared if he had been attacked in the dark. Hinata stops walking. The same thing happened to me. Suga had gone through the same thing as he had, gruesome torture, but the older boy had only shed a few tears and nothing else. He had broken down, refused to be alone or even step near the dark. Suga is strong. Hinata had known that of course, had played with the older boy for months and knew that Suga was strong in ways he would never be. But this... He glances at the older boy, notices the sweat rolling down his neck in an effort to keep going. Wants to offer support, a crutch, but Suga had pushed him away stating he was fine to walk. Suga is strong. His brain repeated, it turned into cement, heavy and true. Suga is strong. A mantra, a prayer for the older boy.
They stop in front of Ukai's store, Daichi tells them to wait outside with a stern look that has Suga giggling. Why is he laughing? Hinata wonders, but can't quite meet eyes to discover the intent behind the action. He wants to question Suga, take responsibility for the actions of the two captains that could have injured him. Mine. Slut. Mine. Whore. He's still not certain, Suga refused to talk about it further since they had left the house. Hinata is ready to beg for the information if need be. "Are you okay, Shouyou?" He flinches at the use of his name again, glances up into Suga's too warm eyes then glues his gaze onto his feet. Nods slowly, "Sorry." Am I okay? Perplexed as he is, he doesn't want to ask why.
We need to hurry. The pills are starting to sizzle in his stomach, then he'd never stop speaking his thoughts, admitting to crimes he was responsible for. Daichi returns moments after, clutching the same things they had purchased yesterday. Before Suga had been attacked because of me. Needs to remind himself, because he's the only one that knows. The can of coffee and bar are forced into his hands, he forces them into the pockets of the jacket he has on at the same time he forces his thoughts to quiet down.
He clutches as Daichi's hand like he might die, both of his hands are sweaty around the older boy's, but he's not focused on that. They're gonna know it was my fault. Walking into school was a muted affair, the older boys stopped where the stairs separated their classes, Daichi holding onto Suga's school bag with a grim expression. "Hinata, my hand?" Hands that carve names. He swallows down the words before they can form on his tongue and lets his slick hands fall from the older boy's. His hands flash with ice and he's clutching at his captain again while watching Suga slowly climb the large stairwell.
"Why?" He whispers, it's a loaded question. Why don't you hate me? Why did this happen? Why is Suga not breaking down? Why isn't he scared? Daichi's smile is forced and makes him look ancient, "Suga never misses school, very uh- He wants good grades." So do I but... He thinks the answer has more questions attached to it, but Daichi's hand is pulled from his again and the older boy walks away. Never misses school. "Not even for this." He practically hisses as he walks to his own classroom.
Hinata spends the entire day wondering about Suga-san, his bento is no where to be seen when lunch rolls around. He thinks he might have packed all of them in the setters school bag, but doesn't remember. A glance at the door reveals Kageyama standing in front of his desk, "You're distracted." The taller boy says once he manages to look into Kageyama's eyes. Rubbing at his eyes briefly, he stares at Kageyama more intensely, figuring he must have been really out of it if the dark haired boy actually noticed something. "Did something happen?" Kageyama asks almost hesitantly, forcing Hinata to look at the door wondering if a knife wielding Grand King was going to show up. "I need to go." He shifts his hands to the edge of his desk, ignores how they were still trembling from this morning, and leaves behind a silent Kageyama.
The third floor of Karasuno is a place he's only been once, it had been with Kageyama to investigate Asahi, now he was alone. It feels wrong, but wrong is how Suga-san is allowed to feel. He should be the one in pain, not a smiling, silver haired boy who had never done him, or anyone, wrong. Sliding the only door he recognizes open reveals one of his teammates, but not the one he was looking for. "Yo, Hinata!" Asahi chirps, half a smile on his face. Hinata slams the door shut with more force than necessary and walks to the next one, never misses school, it didn't prove or disprove that the setter could be in college-prep classes. He stops in front of class four, wondering if there were police waiting behind the door to arrest him for murder, or if Kuroo had was waiting for him to show up so he could finish the job. He's in Tokyo. Hinata steels what nerve he can, tugging at his bangs and wondering why he's scared when Suga-san didn't even seem bothered by the fact that he had almost been killed.
Sliding the door opens reveals neither Kuroo or the police, but Daichi is an odd surprise. Hinata didn't know that his captain was also that smart, Suga was less surprising the more he pondered it. "Hinata?" Daichi notices him first, sounding almost shocked at his appearance. He's never ran into his captain during school hours and he'd be surprised too, he figures, then gulps loudly before stepping in. Both of the boys are having lunch, the lunch he had crafted after mopping up blood. His stomach tightens painfully inside of him at the sight, "H-Hi, Daichi-san- how are things?" He asks, offering a smile, but it feels too tight on his face and is dropped quickly. Suga looks up when he speaks and he considers running away, "Suga-san-" He stammers out quickly, making the setter smile almost menacingly.
"Come to check on me? You're so sweet." He thinks the words would be condescending coming from anyone else's mouth, but from Suga's they sound almost like a threat. Forced to wonder if the older boy knows more than he had said, Hinata approaches their shared desk, bowing slightly before sitting on the ground. "I wanted to ask you something." Another loaded question, he reminds himself not to make a habit of using them, Suga's smile widens oddly in one direction, like only half of his face is working. "What's that, Shouyou?" He frowns at the use of his name, almost certain that Suga is teasing him with concealed knowledge. Why doesn't he say something then? Hinata swallows down the question, wondering when he ended up staring at Suga-san's stomach instead of his face.
"Why don't you tell someone?" He half screams, drawing the curious gazes of two girls that are sitting behind Suga. That it was me... The thought forces his face into a grimace. The older boy's smile looks pained and the way that the chopsticks in Suga's hands tremble don't escape his notice. "I can't afford to miss school." It's a stupid explanation, but Hinata is sure that there's more to it than that. Even if Suga was in college-prep courses, he could afford to miss a few days because of almost dying on someone's porch. "You should tell an adult." He wants it to sound like an order, but his tone is uneven and his hands shake harder where they are stuffed in his pockets.
Suga's friendly eyes narrow into an almost glare, he watches the older boy's lips roll for a second before they open. "We're not going to do that, right, Shouyou?" Hinata is absolutely sure that Suga knows everything that he finds himself nodding. He swallows the bile that itches at his throat, "No, you're telling someone or I will." He says, shocked at how even and commanding he had just sounded. Daichi calls his name in a whisper but he ignores it, "Do you really think you can practice like that? Somebody is going to notice." He's whispers the words as he gestures to Suga's concealed stomach. Mine. Hinata thinks he can see the outline of the words through Suga's shirt and the bandages. Blinking the image away, he stares into the older boy's eyes unwavering.
"Hinata, please." He feels almost relieved that Suga uses his family name, even with his previous conflicts with it. "If anyone finds out, they'll overreact." He thinks that Suga's reaction is an overreaction in itself, blinks when he realizes that he had just said that out loud. Suga's stare hardens, "Hinata, if you tell anyone-" The silver haired boy is cut off by their captain, "Suga, he's right." It's a harsh whisper that makes his skin crawl. "We should tell Ukai, at least." Daichi pacifies, trying to mediate fairly. Hinata thinks that's stupid, Suga needs help. Two boys are glaring at him now. "Do you really expect to practice- to change, like that?" Daichi points at Suga's stomach, forcing their focus on it.
The silver haired boy flinches like the wounds have been prodded at, "I- Didn't think about that." Suga admits sheepishly, then he's smiling again. Hinata cringes, hating the sight of it for some reason. "The longer this waits, the more trouble we'll be in." Suga sighs, and Daichi stops talking, but only for a second, "We'll never catch the guy if we wait longer." His breathing stops when Daichi finishes speaking. Catch Grand King. Catch Kuroo. "What did he say, a message?" Daichi is whispering again, and Suga nods an affirmative.
Mine. He stands on shaking legs when the bell rings, the older boys falling silent long before that. Mine follows him back to his desk, lingers in his mind until he's scratching at his scalp to get it out. Scratches at his hands to keep them away from his head, his head is too full of thoughts and he can't let other people hear them right now. His hands are seeping blood by the time the final bell rings, he launches himself from the classroom, noticing dully how odd it is to be using the door for his exit.
Daichi and Suga were standing outside of the gym, still in their uniforms, they looked up when he approached him. "You're late." He ran as fast as he could, so he assumes it's a joke. "Window was shut." He lies, and the older boys smile down at him. "Is he in there?" Daichi nods, waves his cell phone like it has answers then pushes the gym door open. The darkness forces him to pause, fear gripping his legs like shackles. The door collides painfully into his back but he pays it no mind. He and Suga were attacked in the dark, Hinata wouldn't let this place turn into that.
He watches the older boy's freeze, probably noticing his pause, and they turn back to him. "Oh-right." Daichi sounds almost amused with his ensuing panic, and rushes back to him, offering him a large hand. Hinata stares at it, confused, a hand didn't bring light. The tanned digits flex, calling him, and he grabs onto it. Trust my captain. They walk quickly into the half-darkness of the school gym, and Hinata can feel his breathing get more and more erratic as they pace into it. "Almost there." Suga promises, but he's only a shadow and the words freak him out more than they help.
Nodding with nobody to see, he follows Daichi's leading until they're in against the wall of the gym, switches are flicked and the room bursts with light. A sigh escapes him, but Daichi continues to lead him until they're all standing in front of a door he's never been inside of. "Ukai is in there." He figures it's the room where official coaches did official coach things, and accepts the information silently. His eyes focus onto Suga's profile, Hinata thinks he can see anger and fear in them, something he finds comfort in. That Suga is hurting but also allowing himself to hurt.
Daichi is the one that knocks on the door, then twists the handle without pause. His captain's hand leads him into a small room, white like the rest of the gym walls but posters are attached in random places. They're forgotten as soon as his eyes are off of them, they focus on their coach, sitting in a chair with a grim expression. More than usual anyway, he thinks half amused. Ukai blinks at them, then waves them towards the chairs in front of the desk Ukai is behind. Two of them, angled towards each other and made of uncomfortable looking wood. Daichi's hand leads him towards the proffered chairs, and then he's settled in his captain's lap; he thinks he'd be embarrassed if the circumstances were different. Fear still rattles around him, itches in his arms until he's clawing at them.
"What is this about?" Ukai asks after an awkward moment filled with him just scratching. Hinata scratches harder when Ukai's voice interrupts his thoughts, he glances at Suga-san, who looks like he might start pouting at any moment. "Sugawara needs to tell you something." Daichi says firmly, but Hinata thinks he can make out a waver in the deep hum. Emotions flicker across Suga's face, but Hinata can only pick out fear and anger, then he's unbuttoning his shirt. He could almost laugh at Ukai's blanching face, which quickly turns into a grimace as the tightly wrapped gauze is revealed; it's almost hard to see, the way it blends in with Suga's pale skin, but it doesn't shine under the lights above them and Ukai's eyes glare into the bandages.
"What?" Ukai huffs, half scared and half annoyed. Hinata flinches at the sound of Suga tugging at the bandages, and his fingers still for a moment, watching raptly as pale fingers dig at the wrappings. "What the fuck?" He doesn't correct the coach's language, certain the words would have spilled from his mouth as well if he wasn't biting into his bottom lip like he is. Ukai dashes around the desk, kneeling in front of the setter in half a second, fingers ghosting over the wounds. "Mine." Ukai reads bluntly, and his head jerks at the word.
"Who did this?" The older man growls, tugging at the blond locks that are usually tied back. Hinata watches as Suga smiles sadly, "I don't know. I was leaving Daichi's and it was dark outside." Guilt latches onto Hinata's heart at the words, I could have made him stay. Then Ukai is looking at him, or Daichi, he thinks it might be both. "Did you boys see what happened?" His head is shaking, he knows what happened and maybe even why, but Ukai didn't ask that, and he doesn't want to say.
"Suga said the guy said it was a message." Ukai's frown deepens drastically when Daichi speaks, then nods curtly. "Did you call the police?" He asks to Suga, who's face twists with color blooming on his cheeks. "No." The silver haired boy says quietly. Ukai barks at him, "Why the hell not?" But Suga doesn't flinch at the raised voice as Hinata does, doesn't react to it in the slightest. Ukai sighs, Hinata thinks it's the longest he's ever heard in his life, then looks up and into Suga's eyes. "It's about that stupid school, isn't it?" The older man says, sounding knowing, and angry for knowing. The setter reacts to that, his head jerking almost violently, then his eyes are finally seeing their coach. He nods, then his gaze darts away. School? It's not surprising that Suga was thinking about school, but that school. Did he get accepted somewhere?
"You already got accepted, you don't need to- force yourself." Daichi's voice is loud in his ear, the slight pause before force, he thinks, was only for his sake. Hinata distantly recalls the morning after Daichi had found him, shaking from the dark with his butt burning and neck bleeding. Ukai nods slowly, glaring at the pouting setter. "I just wanted to secure-" But he is cut off with Ukai's screaming, "You could have died!" The older man's hands latch onto Suga's thighs, like he's restraining himself from strangling the scarred boy. Hinata realizes that that might actually be the case.
"I never figured you for an idiot." Ukai's voice is almost a growl, he's not sure if that's better or worse than the yelling. Suga's trembling tells him it's probably worse. "You should have- How long did it take you to find him?" Ukai's eyes are now back on him and Daichi. "Uh- We found him when we were leaving for work, around five then." Ukai's eyes drag back to Suga, "How long were you out there?" Ukai sounds worried, but mostly angry. "All night." Is Suga's quiet admission. Everything goes quiet.
"A message?" Ukai whispers against Suga's stomach, blunt fingers tracing the dark scars. Suga nods silently at the question. Hinata's heart drops while Daichi's speeds against his back. "You think it might be..." Ukai's voice trails off, then he's clearing his throat as if to buy time. "Yakuza? Or a gang?" Hinata almost laughs, but dread grasps at his vocal chords. "It was just one guy." Suga says quietly, sounding completely drained. The coach shrugs, "Messengers are usually just one guy, do you remember anything else?" He almost hates Ukai for pushing for details, details that would lead back to him through Grand King or Kuroo. Suga's chin clenches up at the question, "It was too dark to see but, his hands were huge... And he laughed." Ukai frowns at that, it was very little to go on. Hinata knew that both Grand King and Kuroo had huge hands, both had... very unusual laughs.
"What did it sound like?" He asks, the first time he's spoken since they've entered the room. Ukai looks up at him when he speaks, can see the coach's eyes spark with something. "Good one, Hinata." He is praised softly and it hurts more than it heals. Hinata had no intention of telling anyone about Grand King or Kuroo's laughs, until he was ready, until he feels he could handle their hatred. Suga hums quietly, and he's reminded of Kenma, misses the blond boy so much it hurts. "It was kind of like- a barking, or a dying animal." Suga scratches at his head while Hinata's fills with doubt. A barking laugh. The confirmation made his stomach wither and clench and hurt
Kuroo had come to Miyagi, to Daichi's house, just to send me a message. Possibilities race through his head, questions dart by in a half seconds, but there's only one that matters. How did Kuroo know where I'd be, that I'd find Suga-san. Hinata almost thinks that Suga-san wasn't meant to be found alive, but the cuts, he'd been told, had been shallow. A message from Kuroo. Why would he need another reminder, Kuroo had pictures if he had acted against him, he wonders if the older boy had seen him with Grand King. Maybe Grand King told him? He doesn't think it's likely that Kuroo just happened to know where Daichi was living, that he'd be there. Maybe he didn't know, maybe he just found him?
Not a coincidence. He realizes that it's almost impossible for it to be a coincidence, and he scratches hard at his arms. I really did get him hurt. He thinks it should hurt more, the realization and the scratching. Suga-san's face is frowning and angled towards him. I got you hurt.
"Listen I-" Ukai clears his throat again, Hinata wonders if the older man has been smoking even more than usual, "I have some friends- I'll have them ask around, if you really don't want to talk with the police." He frowns at that, wondering what kind of friends Ukai could have that could ask around, but Suga is smiling again, something painful and honest. It doesn't hurt as much as the previous ones had, but he was still scared to look into the other boy's eyes without seeing scars and hearing Mine repeat in his head until he fainted.
Ukai sighs when Suga nods, thanks the man almost cheerfully. He thinks that Ukai wanted Suga to go to the police, he wanted Suga to go the police, but it was either this way or someone- Kuroo would get away with an almost murder. A message. "No practice." Ukai says like an afterthought, almost flippantly, but Hinata would tackle the silver haired boy if he even thought about playing volleyball right now. Suga nods, "What do we tell the team?" It's the only instance where he hates that Suga thinks of the team before himself, this is bigger than who's playing setter, Ukai shrugs. "Tell 'em whatever you want, that you sprained something. Just- Don't show them this." Suga nods, and Ukai stands back up.
"Not a word from either of you." Daichi's chin collides with his head as they both nod, Ukai snorts at them, and the atmosphere is that much less gloomy and terrible. "You two, get changed. Suga, on the bench." They all nod, verbally confirming as well. They all exit the room silently, into the already occupied gym.
The court in front of them freezes when the office door shuts loudly, everyone turns to look at them with open curiously. Hinata has to steel himself, not a word, as Daichi walks them over to the bench were Suga is deposited. The older boy almost leads him away, but the force stops when Suga's voice calls out. "Hinata..." He's not sure what Suga might say, scared that the older boy would choose now to admit that he knows everything, or that he might yell at him for getting an adult, or would cry because they'd both been hurt in the dark.
"Thank you." Then nothing else. Thank me? He nods to the older boy, watches Suga smile at him then waving them off through blurry eyes. Thank you. Suga didn't know, didn't know that it was his fault the older boy had gotten hurt. He waits until they're in the club room to break down, falling onto the floor and curling up while sobs make his body shake beyond his control. My fault. His mind taunts, and he cries harder until thick blobs of moisture trail down his cheeks and he's screaming into his knees.
He ignores Daichi calling his name, ignores everything but his thoughts, Your fault. Your fault. They tease, Mine. Mine. Kuroo calls, he can see the dark haired man standing in Daichi's face, smiling down at him with blood splatters on his face. "No!" He screeches, crawls away on trembling limbs until he hits something hard. You're mine now. The screams until the voice is drowned out, calling him stupid nicknames. He wipes Suga-san's blood off his arms and screams again. My fault.
The darkness is all consuming and welcomes him while he continues to fear it. Hinata. It calls menacingly, a growl into his ear, wonders why the dark calls him when he's already here. "I'm sorry!" He screams, into nothingness, but the darkness doesn't forgive him. The darkness hurts his arms, they throb with the beat he can hear in his ears. "Stop! He cries, voice weak now, coughing from the strain in his throat. It burns but the burn doesn't bring back memories of owls, but it does bring eyes that don't blink. Chopper and penetrating that make his blood run cold. "Please don't." He begs, and the darkness stills.
"Hinata!" The eyes in front of him aren't chopper, or bright orange, but that doesn't take away from their penetrating seriousness. "Daichi." He gasps out, relieved and terrified at the same time. "Are you okay?" Kenma's words. He doesn't know if he's okay, but he doesn't care, Suga isn't okay. He got Suga hurt and won't tell anyone who it was. Hinata nods anyway, "How long?" His head is heavy and throbbing. Panic attack. He tells himself, but it didn't feel like it, it was the truth and the darkness both coming for him.
"Only a few minutes." He nods, looking away from Daichi's eyes when he has the chance. "Sorry." He offers, tallies up all the times he's apologized today but can't find a number. "You're bleeding." He remembers Kenma saying that after bringing him the most intense pleasure of his life, but Kenma wasn't here, Kenma was in Tokyo. Kuroo's there too. Hinata doesn't quite believe that, Kuroo could still be in Miyagi, could be in Daichi's house waiting for them.
His thoughts drain from his head when Daichi's chest covers his face, tries to mimic the breathing from the man covering him. "I'm sorry." He gasps out, but Daichi hushes him softly. "You're just scared, seeing a- seeing Suga like that, couldn't have helped when you were already..." Daichi doesn't finish his sentence, but he remembers his dream and memories in more detail at that moment. I couldn't save either of them. He sobs into Daichi's shoulder, taking advantage of someone after he got their best friend hurt. There's a sick feeling settling his gut, that makes his vision blur with the pain.
"Hinata?" He hums weakly, forcing his eyes back open, wondered when they had fallen shut. "Have you eaten?" He thinks of Suga's stomach, the blood soaked towels and the itching in his arms. Shaking his head makes him dizzy, but Daichi's growling makes him focus. "You're such an idiot." He flinches at the words, but his head is caught between a wall and Daichi's shoulder. "Sorry?" He offers, very confused as to why that matters when Suga-san couldn't eat without being reminded of the dark. Mine.
"You passed out because you haven't been eating." He wants to remind Daichi that he's been skipping meals for years, skipping medication for just as long, that he had eaten yesterday when Suga's blood wasn't under his fingernails. "You need to eat." There are hands inside of his borrowed coat that makes his insides burn, he doesn't want to eat, almost gags when he hears familiar plastic. "No." He tries but granola is shoved into him when he speaks, dry and unrelenting in a spiteful way. The way that Kuroo made him fear the dark, tears roll down his cheeks the same way they had before and he can hear Kuroo's barking chuckle when his vision starts to blot black.
"Eat, Hinata." His teeth clamp down, like they should have back then, Kuroo would have killed him. Suga would be okay. Hinata chews under supervision, swallowing reminds him of too many things that turn into nothing, he chokes and wetness is poured into his mouth. Coffee. It's bitter and he deserves nothing but that. My fault, he's reminded as if he could ever forget. Daichi feeds him like an animal, makes encouraging noises when he does as he's told. You're mine now. He's been claimed like an animal. The coffee sinks lower in his gut.
The crushing weight on his shoulders relent, and his arms are prodded at. Glances down when Daichi makes a weird noise. His arms were still bleeding, small crescent shaped wounds that drag into long lines, all of them sharp red and leaking crimson. "Sorry." He offers emptily, and Daichi responds by standing, procuring something from the far end of the room. A white box. It's the same one that was used on Suga, but the plastic fills him with dread in the same way.
His arms sizzle and his flesh burns as liquid slides over his arms. Attempting to pull back his arms turns useless as Daichi's grip threaten to shatter his wrists, he goes limp, leaning against the wall and ignoring the pain of retribution. I deserve to hurt. Suga was hurt for me. Kuroo, he needs to talk to Kuroo. His phone is at home, doesn't remember grabbing it after discovering Suga. "Hinata." He groans softly in return, "Get dressed." He doesn't want to practice, he wants to be forgiven.
Daichi tugs on his elbows until he's standing, too big jacket and too big clothes are tugged off of his body until he's bare, exposed. Feels his captain's eyes roam his body, studying, Daichi makes a noise that he can't decipher. A locker is opened and his hands are heavy soon after. "Get dressed." Echoed with more feeling, anger that he recognizes, nods slowly and forces his eyes open. Practice clothes are piling his arms, drops them onto the floor and walks into his shorts. Tugs on knee pads, using a shirt to cover his squirming stomach. Toes into his gym shoes.
"Practice." He mumbles, Daichi makes another noise, and tugs on his hand. Hinata isn't sure he can handle practice, he's distracted and his his limbs are shaking, Daichi is pretty much dragging him through the gym doors, which should be signal enough that he shouldn't be here. Shouldn't be near Suga-san, or anyone, in case they get hurt.
The team is crowding around the bench where they had left Suga, questions fire too quickly for Hinata to pick any of them out. Daichi leads them towards the noise and his hands start shaking harder. "Hey! Quit standing around!" There's grumbling and his hand is released. "Are you guys okay? You were gone for a long time." He looks at Suga, looking almost broken and small on the bench. There's a smile from the silver haired boy that he can't figure out, Daichi answers for them, "Hinata had another panic attack." Suga's smile disappears suddenly, turns into furrowed brows and a frown. "Are you okay? Your arms are covered." He nods instead of talking, his throat is itchy and sore from screaming and choking down food.
"He passed out- hadn't eaten all day. He's been scratching since we talked to Ukai." Shame fills his veins, realizing that Daichi had noticed before he did. "Sorry." He offers to both of them, Daichi sighs roughly and Suga's next smile is small. "You need to take better care of yourself, Shouyou." He nods but doesn't see the point. "Now go practice, I need to talk to Daichi." He nods again, turning away from a sight that makes his eyes burn. "Oh, wait!" He stops, stares at Suga's nose instead of at the wide brown eyes, can see the older boy's smile grow more friendly before he speaks, "Make sure you practice for the both of us." He nods again, the goal makes his mind less foggy.
Get stronger. It's a promise to Suga-san, to his dad, to himself. It's a promise to Kuroo, that he would pay.