I loved writing this chapter. Let me know what you think.. quite long I know but I got carried away.

Phanty belongs to Leroux and Lloyd Weber.

Again, I rushed through the crowds after my performance, politely dismissing those who tried to enter into conversation with me or congratulate me.

Again, I was met with Raoul.

"Supper, Christine?" I spun around to see him standing behind me, watching me open the door to my dressing room and the secrets that lay beyond it. "Come, Little Lotte. It has almost been a week since my arrival and you have not yet had supper with me."

"Raoul." I sighed, leaning on the door. "You don't understand..."

Why are you making me do this? I didn't want to keep hurting him but I couldn't possibly explain my actions.

"What is there to understand?" He removed his top hat and walked closer to me. I couldn't help but push myself further against the door behind me. "If for whatever reason, I have offended you, you must tell me. Is that it, Christine?"

"No. Not at all!" I reached out to touch his arm reassuringly. What was I doing? I was confusing myself...

He stared at my hand, apparently perplexed by the action.

"What is it then?" He asked, taking a step backwards.

"I... I've just finished a show, Raoul. I am tired." It wasn't that. It wasn't that at all... truthfully I didn't know what it was.

"Well when? Christine, surely you know of my intentions. That much I have made clear."

Intentions..?

"I don't think that I am asking that much of you... just a simple meal. If I am bothering you, tell me and I shall not ask again."

"No, I... I do want to."

"Great." He said, smiling again and adjusting his cravat. "...When?"

"Raoul."

"When? Tomorrow?"

"Alright, yes. Yes." I said dismissively. It wasn't at all that I didn't want to see him... I just needed to see Erik and I didn't want Erik to think that I was late because I was talking to Raoul... "I have tomorrow off."

"Alright, then." He beamed. "It is settled. We shall have lunch here in the city. I shall take you to the finest establishment that Paris has to offer and you can have whatever you wish." He took my hand in his and kissed it gently before replacing his top hat and turning to walk away. "I shall leave you to rest."

"Thank you, Raoul." I said, smiling. I felt terrible. He was being so kind, so decent after I had treated him so poorly.

"Oh, Christine?"

"Yes?"

"You were wonderful tonight, as always."

"Thank you..." I said as he walked away.

Suddenly remembering why I had dismissed him I fumbled for my keys excitedly and opened the door to my dressing room once more. Just as I had last night, I locked it behind me and sat down to remove my wig. Raoul... He had always meant a lot to me; as a child he had been my best friend. But if he was my friend, why could I not tell him the truth? Why did I have to dine with him just to keep the peace between us? He had spoken of intentions... what intentions were those? Surely I knew... Surely I had known all along...

I walked to the opposite wall and began to change behind the small, concertina barrier. When I sat back down at my dressing table I saw Erik in the mirror behind me. I spun around in alarm.

"You gave me a fright!" I said, standing up. He was sitting exactly where he had been the night before. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?" He smiled smugly. "Same time, same place you said." My hand flew to my chest and I exhaled.

"I mean move about like that? I didn't hear you come in."

"Ah. Many years of practice as the resident ghost, I would say. Truthfully, I thought it might be quite entertaining to see the expression of shock on your face when you saw me."

"Well I did not find it entertaining at all." I said, sitting back down at my dressing table.

"I'm sorry, Christine." He said, standing up and walking towards me with his hands in his pockets. "I didn't know it would upset you that much. I won't do it again."

I looked at him in the mirror.

"Did you see my performance?"

"Christine, how could you ask that? Of course I did. Perfect as always... Some of your annunciation was lost in act four but you are just tired, I expect."

"You... watched all of it?" I turned around and looked up at him. He towered over me and the candle light highlighted his face perfectly; it was as if he had learned to use the light to his advantage in every situation. Only allowing me to see what he wished. His white mask was glowing and my eyes were drawn to it; I yearned to ask about it but I could not. Not yet.

"Of course, what sort of tutor would I be if I did not?" His piercing blue eyes stared down at me; they seemed as if they had the power to penetrate my every thought but thankfully they did not...

I stood up and faced him, as I did so he took a step back and his hands fell from his pockets. He seemed almost disarmed by my proximity; as if all his confidence had melted away in a second... He cleared his throat and turned away from me.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"N... Nothing." He managed, sitting down just as he had done last night. I sat down next to him. He seemed anxious; vexed somehow. Deciding however not to pursue it, I spoke again.

"Erik... will you take me to your home?" He looked up at me.

"You... don't want to be down there, Christine. It's better that we stay up here, trust me."

"But why? It's just a dressing room..? Wouldn't you feel much more comfortable in your own home?"

"Perhaps but... it is not somewhere you should be. I do not live down there by choice, Christine. Do not ask to join me down there; instead relish your time up here, with the living... and allow me to do the same from time to time."

I didn't know what to say... he was being strange; cryptic in a way. I knew that there was a dark side to his character that he was not yet ready to unearth.. truthfully, neither was I.

"Alright." I said. "Let's stay up here. I would like to visit your home again, though. Perhaps one day?"

"...Perhaps." He said, looking away.

"Is it safe up here, though...? I mean..."

"No one will bother us." He said. "I..." There it was... I had known that something was on his mind.

"What..?" I asked. He took a deep breath before speaking.

"I just... I wish that I could take you somewhere; anywhere. You deserve so much..." Was that what had been on his mind? Truly, it did not matter where we were or what we did...

"Is that it? Is that what has been bothering you? Don't let that trouble you, Erik. Please..."

"No, you deserve so much... you deserve to be courted and all that I can offer you is a trip down to the cellars. It just angers me..."

Courted?

"You... wish to court me?" He looked at me then, shocked at what he had let slip and I could have sworn that I saw him blush.

"Well... I... When a man and woman... if they..." he rubbed his neck irritably. "If they should... If you should... Well I'm, I'm just saying that... when people court they..."

"Is that what this is?" I asked. Part of me was enjoying seeing him like this; it was a refreshing sight. Again, he looked at me; mouth agape.

"...Well... I w... I wouldn't say that... All I meant was... I mean... would... is that something that...? No... I meant..."

"I... would court you." I said.

"I... you... what?" He asked; exasperated.

"I don't know what this is but... I have never courted anyone before. I would like for us to...?"

"I... I have not either. Do you mean that, Christine? I... wasn't trying to imply anything before, I... I mean I had hoped that such a thing would... come to pass but I would never presume to..."

"I know." I said, touching his hand.

"I mean... I wouldn't know where to start but I... I would give you anything you asked, Christine. I would give you all I had..." He held my hand tightly. I had never seen him like this; his voice seemed higher, his speech seemed to be picking up momentum and excitement with each passing word. His words; rushed in his child-like state of excitement, almost as if he were worried that if he did not get everything out, the offer would be revoked.

"And... I don't know how something like this can work... but... I know that I want to spend time with you. I want to spend every second with you..." He smiled unabashedly and seemed only to be speaking to himself now. "That's enough for me. Is it enough for you?"

"Yes." I smiled. He took a breath and touched his forehead in complete disbelief.

"I never expected..." He began; his voice now deep and husky once more. "I just wish that I could... take you somewhere like the Vicomte..."

"Vicomte? What..?" What had he just said? Surely he had not heard the conversation outside with Raoul... how was that possible? "What do you know of that?" I probed. His face fell and I could see that he had not intentionally mentioned Raoul... only slipped in his state of excitement.

"I... I'm sorry, Christine. I should not have mentioned it."

"No... tell me what you meant." Surely he had not been eavesdropping on my conversation...

"I..." He sighed and released my hand. "I overheard your conversation with the Vicomte..."

He had...

"How..?"

"I can... hear things through the mirror..." He gestured to the mirror/doorway to his left. "And... I can see things."

"What?"

"I... I am so sorry... but believe me, I have never..."

"This... is a complete breach of trust, Erik." I moved away from him

"Christine, please. I have never... looked on you in a dishonorable way. I am not that sort of man."

"How do I know that? I don't know what sort of man you are! I hardly know you! Oh... what am I doing?" I stood up and walked to the mirror. What had he seen? What had he heard?

"I would not lie to you, Christine. Please... you must believe..."

"No, but you would deceive me! Who are you!?"

"No I..." He dropped his head in exasperation. "I didn't... I. Please, Christine."

"I cannot trust you now, Erik. How do I know that you are who you say? Is that even your name?"

"Yes!" He stood up and held my shoulders gently. "Of course...! Chris..."

"How can I believe you?" I pushed him away. "What have I been doing? Fooling myself into believing that this can work... that my feelings are real because now I know you; now you are real... But you aren't!"

"I am! This can work! Please, Christine... I promise. There isn't anything else. That is all! I never..."

"How can I trust you..!? I think you should go..."

"No, please, let me explain myself!" I turned to look at him and the desperation in his eyes prevented me from denying him his wish.

"Alright..." I sighed. "Explain."

"I... I never lied to you, Christine. And surely, whatever I am... you know that I would never to anything to hurt you. I am able to hear things through the mirror because it was designed as such... Do not forget that this is the main dressing room; it belongs to whoever possesses the leading role... It was La Carlotta's dressing room... and although I had always hoped it would be yours along with every lead role, it was primarily hers. I must admit to being the cause of many if not all of what has befallen her over the years... that was my prime objective..." He sat back down.

"You must understand that... being who I am dictates how I must live. I must see everything and hear everything; I must be everywhere. I never for a second intended for you to be affected by that. I have passages that go everywhere and caverns behind walls... you cannot even imagine how many. But you must trust when I say that I have never used them improperly. Never."

"I'm sorry, Christine. This is all such a mess. There is so much that you do not know about me... foolishly I had hoped for... whatever this is between us to run smoothly but it cannot. I feel as though I need to explain myself before we can go any further... and I truly appreciate you allowing me to do so."

As he spoke, my anger faded away. Perhaps it was his words... perhaps it was simply the sound of his voice that was soothing. But I listened... I gave him the chance to speak that he so desired and with every passing word I understood a little more about him... and about myself. It was strange hearing him speak this much in person, but I grew used to his voice. It was, after all the voice that I had heard since my childhood.

I believed his words for he spoke them with such sincerity that I was powerless not to. He also seemed the type of person who would not willingly speak this much unless it were absolutely imperative... that spoke truth as well. But discovering this unearthed more concerns; concerns that I had held since our first meeting but had not mentioned... Why had he deceived me for so long...?

"It hurts me when you say that I deceived you for I never meant to do such a thing. All I ever wanted to do was to protect you, Christine. You must know that. I had hoped to avoid this conversation until it absolutely needed addressing but I can see that that time is now." Although I was listening, I was utterly mesmerized by his actions; the way he moved. Again, I could not avert my gaze as he did something as simple as loosen his cravat and sit forward on his seat.

"When... you came to the Opera as a child, I could see that you lacked comfort, guidance... I could see that you were in need of someone, something to hold onto in the darkness and I daresay I was in need of the same thing. So, perhaps It was selfish of me in the beginning... perhaps it was selfish of me up until now, but I identified something within you that was also lacking in me. You were lost without your father; you were shrinking further and further within yourself and I was convinced that if I did not intervene, you would be lost. I came to you as an angel because I knew that you would accept me that way... I knew that an angel was what you were looking for, and so that is what I became. Truthfully, the Angel of Music was a fitting title, I thought. I had always loved music." He smiled absentmindedly. He looked at me. "The truth is I didn't know your father. He didn't send me to you... But I have watched over you as an angel would, and I always will. I... was simply a man who lived... lives at the Opera and saw someone who needed guidance. I thought that we were similar souls, you and I..."

"I am not trying to justify my deception at all... it was wrong of me to keep it a secret for so long but as time went by and as we both grew older, I found it harder and harder to convince myself to tell you the truth. I knew that I needed to present myself to you as a man somehow and... I chose the night of your debut purely because I was afraid of losing you."

"Losing me?" His last words provoked my speech. What did he mean?

"...Yes. You see..." He seemed reluctant to speak. "Over the years, I... I had formed... affections for you... And I thought that... if you were reunited with your childhood friend, you may not have had time for me anymore; time for your music lessons... I feared that if you were reunited with... le Vicomte before I could reveal myself, I would not have stood a chance... Saying it out loud makes me realize how truly wrong it was. And, although I can explain myself, nothing really excuses my actions." He stood up and collected his cape. "Now you know. If you wish for me to go now, I will."

"No... Wait." I touched his arm as he was turning to leave and he looked down at my hand. "If you are just a man... how did you come to live here?" He smiled sadly at me.

"Quite a sad story, I'm afraid. And not nearly as interesting as that of an Angel's..." He chuckled mirthlessly.

"Will you not tell me?" I asked.

"I'm... not quite ready to share that... But please don't think that it is because I do not wish for you to know..."He smiled at me again and his eyes swam with the words he could not utter. He moved as if to touch my face but stopped at the last second. "I'm... so sorry for everything. I should go." He turned to leave once more but I had not removed my hand from his arm and I pulled him gently towards me. I did not wish for him to leave; not anymore. Not now that I knew the truth... what sort of life had he lived?

"No... I... don't wish for you to leave." He turned and stood before me; his eyes searching my face for answers he could not fathom. Then, I embraced him. He did not return it at first and I thought I felt him shudder slightly.

"I don't know why you live the life that you do..." I said quietly. "But I am so sorry for it. Do not for a second think that I do not want you here." Before I knew it, my eyes were welling up with tears; tears for him, tears for the moment, tears for the two of us finally reunited as people. "I need you here, with me. I need you to protect me as you always have..." As those words I felt his arms finally wrap around me and I was lost in the warmth of his clothing and the strength of his embrace. The security that I had always felt under his watch had materialized and I found that I did not want to let go. He held me tightly and I felt him exhale into my hair.

"Ch...Christine." He managed; more of a statement than a question but I knew that nothing would follow. I pulled away slightly and looked up at him; His eyes were filled with tears too and again he was searching my face for answers to a question he had not asked.

"Erik." I said, and a tear slid down his cheek.