Chapter Six

Dearest Dillon

I am sorry for the

I will miss you and I am truly so

I hope you can for

Diana stood on the old wood pier gazing out into the open water that stretched for miles. She watched the red sun slowly be devoured be the cool small waves. It wasn't too cold for January and only a small layer of snow covered the ground. But still, Diana pulled her closure to her, trying to absorb every last ounce of heat she could. People surrounded her at all sides. They were all living there on lives and only concerned about themselves. This was one thing she would miss about Paris. No one knew her and no one seemed to have the time to learn. Here, she was an average person. She knew once she got back home to New York that she would be the talk of the city. Papers would be writing about her arrival and rumors would flare about where she has been.

But it was time to go back. It was time to go see her mother and time to meet her nephew. As much fun as it was here, New York was her home that she missed so dearly. A slight breeze began to pick up sending a shiver down her spine. She then realized she still held the wrinkled paper in her left hand. She shook her head as she read over the words that stained the page with its black ink. She felt guilty about her behavior towards Dillon at the Vin Rouge only days before. As she wrote down her apology the words didn't seem right. Still he had no right to insult her the way he did. She shouldn't be the one saying sorry, it should be him. But even if he did apologize why should it make any difference. No matter what he said, she was still going back to New York. Nothing he said could make her stay. Not even I love you. "I love you," the words flashed crossed her mind. It was the first time she really thought about what he said back at the restaurant. She only thought of him as a friend. Before she knew it, she had crumbled up the paper and threw it into the sea with rage. But it only drifted down in the breeze before settling down to its watery grave. Mixed emotions of angry and sadness filled her aching heart. Are the words he said about her true? "Am I going back for Henry? Will I be lonely there? No," she thought to herself, "I am going back for my family and I won't be lonely." It has been over a year since she saw him last and her feelings were surly gone. If she did see Henry, he would probably have forgotten her by now. He has to have a girlfriend by now. Or even a wife.

Diana had become overwhelmed with all the thoughts of Dillon and Henry. But she made up her mind, and nothing could change that. She somehow had to get rid of all her thoughts that were swimming in her head. She decided to look over her belongings to make sure everything was where it was supposed to be. It didn't take too long to find nothing was missing for she didn't bring much with her to Paris in the first place. She signed and glanced into the sea of people and not recognizing a single one. She turned back around and leaned against the aged wooden rail with her belongings close to her side. Time began to tick away slowly as she watched the waves crash against the old moss covered beams. Each wave seem to have calmed Diana down a little piece at a time. She closed her eyes and let the breeze overtake her. Her chocolate girls danced in the wind behind her as the cold bit her nose. It seemed like she had been waiting forever but finally the first call from the boat to New York called her name. But before she knew it, her warm familiar scarf found her away around her neck. She opened her eyes and right as a set of hands rested on her shoulders. She brought one of her own hands to find the soft fabric between her fingers.

"You left this behind at the restaurant the other night. I thought you would want it back," Dillon whispered in her ear but she wasn't in the mood to hear it. She pushed his hands away from herself and turned to meet his face. But his expression told her he was not here to be his funny usual self. At least she owed him something instead of dead silence.

"Thanks," is all she could say. He stood before her, waiting for her to say something else but she offered nothing, he began to rub his hands together to buy some time. She thought that he had come unprepared but then he began to cough as if trying to find the words.

"What are you doing here, Dillon?" she asked before he could say anything.

"I came, I came to apologize," he stuttered, "I shouldn't have said any of those things back at the restaurant." He gave a slight pause before continuing. "It was just not what I wanted to hear."

"Well I am sorry that I can't tell you what I want to hear all the time," she snapped back. He didn't seem hurt about it so he continued.

"It was a long shot that you would feel the same way about me to and I took that risk. But when you told me you were going back to New York with all those rude and heartless people-"

"What are you saying? Those people you are talking about are my family and friends!" Angry was beginning to surface but she wouldn't let the expression show on her face.

"You said so yourself that you left to get away from the people," he defended himself.

"Do you have hearing problems? I told you I left because I needed to learn more about myself and find adventure in my life," the faces of her loved ones crossed her mind reminding her how much she missed them. She looked away from and took a deep breath. She scanned the crowd as if trying to find the answer among them.

"And you found the adventure," Dillon said grabbing her hands making her look deep into his eyes. From behind him, she heard a second bell in the distance. It was one of the last calls for all those bound for New York and along with them, was Diana.

"Dillon, I can't deal with this right now-" she began to protest but he cut her off.

"You found your adventure with me." His words stung her deep inside. She knew this was true but not in the same way he found it. He found romance between them were as she only found friendship.

"I-," she whispered but he stopped her by brushing aside one of her strands of dark hair away from her face. She closed her eyes, letting herself get caught up in the moment. But every part of her body wanted to deny the fact of what was happening. She then felt his warm breath on her check locking inside her brain that she knew this was wrong.

"I have to go," she managed to choke out. With a swift move, she stepped out of his reach and picked up her bag. Without a look back she started to walk towards the boarding ship before Dillon's arm shot out and grabbed her arm. She jerked to a stop and turn to face him.

"Wait Diana, just wait," he started to quickly explain. She watched him trying to compose himself. She had none him long enough to know when he was about to lose his temper. This time was one of them.

"I am done waiting," she said coldly.

"Diana stay with me. Stay with me so we can go back to the way we used to be. Let's go discover a new part of town or something just please stay with me," he began to plea. She couldn't believe what he was saying or doing.

"Nothing you can say will make me stay," she tried to explain calmly but Dillon couldn't take it.

"Diana please, I love you please stay with me."

"I have to go," she said firmly and pulled her arm free from his firm grasp. Before he could react to the rejection, she turned and tried to disappear into the crowd. But behind her, he could hear his lost voice mixed with angry and hopelessness calling her name over and over again as he followed her path. Diana knew where she was going but with all the people it seemed to be taking longer than it should. The loud horn broke the muted French whispers and drowned out the sound of the pleading man only steps behind her. The sound warned her for she knew she only had minutes before the boat would leave the dock. There was nothing to stop it from leaving without her. Soon she began to push her way between the slowly moving people. She had to make sure she made it on that boat. Before long, the crowd began to thin and the boat loamed before her. She found the bouncy attendant standing next to the rail that led up to the boat. She ran over to him, waving her passport in her hand. He took it from her and began to look over it. She looked over her shoulder to see if there was any sign of Dillon.

But he was not one to chase after someone to stop them from leaving. No, he had too much pride for that. The attendant then gave her back her passport and told her where to go. She offered quick thanks before escaping onto the deck above. When her feet landed on the newer boat, she couldn't hold back the tears any longer. She let her emotions fall from her eyes as she griped the soft fabric that made up her scarf. But the tears didn't last as long as she thought they would. Instead she wiped her eyes and walked over to the metal railing with her bag in hand. She looked over the crowd; searching for the one familiar face she had once called her friend. But unlike Henry, he was nowhere to be found. Henry. She couldn't imagine that in only a few days she could be face to face with him once again. Before she realized what was happing, the boat was slowly moving away from the old dock. She gave one last look at the city, giving a silent goodbye. She then turned her back on her old life in Paris to step back into her crazy life back in New York. From here on out, she would no longer be not know by the world. Instead, she would be Diana Holland, the one the world truly missed.