Chapter Thirty Six
Dennis Lachance died on a crisp spring morning near the military base of Fort Benning, Georgia. The lorry that had sideswiped his vehicle drove the jeep Denny was driving through the safety barriers before overturning and crushing it mercilessly.
Denny had an easy walk and and an easy smile. He was just the right blend of sensitivity and masculinity. Everybody liked Denny, from teachers and parents down to his classmates and Gordie's friends.
Denny was away at basic training camp when he died and being a soldier suited him. After seeing him in his uniform it was hard to imagine a time when he wasn't in the military. It was also hard to imagine he was gone. Just like that. I think for Gordie, it wasn't just Denny's death that was traumatic for him but the way he had found out.
Or hadn't found out so to speak.
Denny had been driving back to base when the lorry hit the jeep he was driving, It killed him instantly and plunged his passenger into a coma he would never recover from. There were many days that followed where I pictured Denny in the drivers seat, whistling along to the radio, drumming his hands on the leather steering wheel like he did when he drove us for ice cream. I often wondered if Denny Lachance ever saw that lorry coming.
The army called Mr Lachance to tell him the news. Some conversation must have gone on between Mr and Mrs Lachance because Gordie heard his Mom screaming from the furthest end of the yard. Gordie said it felt like his mom screamed for hours. No words, no indication of what was wrong, just loud blood curdling screams that made the hairs on his arms stand on end. Gordie tried to ask what was wrong but Mrs Lachance only continued to scream. Gordie grabbed hold of his Dad who was sat on the stairs staring vacantly into space. He tried to ask him what was wrong, why his mother was screaming but Mr Lachance looked straight through him.
Gordie stayed in that house for fifteen minutes, with his mom screaming and his dad saying nothing before he ran outside and locked himself in the storage shed at the bottom of the garden. That was where Chris had found him the next morning after the news broke. Chris didn't need to tell Gordie by this time.
Deep down, Gordie already knew.
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"So when the delivery comes on Saturday-" Fran was propping open the door to the walk in freezer as she dug through one of the boxes.
"I'm not here on Saturday."
My comment was met with an absolute silence.
"Say what, now?" Fran came out of the freezer to look at me.
I looked back at her blankly. I didn't usually work a weekend but every now and then I helped out when it was called for. This weekend was not one of those weekends.
"Of course you're here. Where else would you be?"
"Remember I told you, it's Denny's birthday? Me and Chris are taking Gordie to Washington."
"Washington? This weekend?" Fran looked frazzled, a rarity in her 'nothing phases me' facade. "It's my nieces wedding this weekend. And Tim is away for his brother's funeral."
"I know that," I said, suddenly feeling stupid. "I guess I thought that Clarissa and Sally…"
"You thought Clarissa and Sally could run the diner for the entire weekend alone?"
"Fran, I told you about this weekend. It's Denny's birthday. We always spend it with Gordie."
Fran shook her head as if to clear it, marched over to the staff rota and tapped her finger on the coming weekend.
"I told you I needed this weekend when I got the invitation. It's on the rota, sweetheart."
"But I told you-"
"People tell me lots of things. But if you're working on the rota, it's fixed. You know this, honey."
I pursed my lips, trying not to lose my temper, trying to remind myself that Fran had given me a roof over my head, a job when I needed it, a shoulder to cry on.
"Look, sweetheart. I aint trying to be difficult. You know I never go anywhere, you can have any other weekend off any time of the year. But this weekend my sisters kid is getting married. And I need you here."
She gave me a sympathetic pat on the back as she passed me to leave the kitchen and I muttered to myself once she was gone. Fran didn't want to be harsh. But she had left the room which meant there was no room for argument.
When my break came around, Chris showed up.
"Buy you a milkshake?"
"No but I can steal us one and you can save the money for liquor."
He looked startled by my sullen tone and reached up to put a hand on the back of my neck.
"Everything okay?"
"Fran won't let me have the weekend off."
Chris took a look around and then took my hand and led me to a table. Once we were sitting, he raised his eyebrows inquisitively.
"What's the problem?"
"I told her but I didn't write it on the stupid rota and she says she can't spare me."
Chris nodded thoughtfully.
"Did you tell her it was Denny's birthday?"
"Yeah, of course. But it's her nieces wedding this weekend. She's not gonna be here."
Chris sighed.
"I'm sure Gordie will understand."
"Will he? It doesn't feel right not to be with him. Especially since Violet's away at her grandparents."
"He's still got me." Chris shrugged. "I'll sell it to him as a guys holiday, he'll be fine. I'm just sorry you have to work….Hey, maybe I could convince him to stay here? We could camp out in the woods and that way we can still-"
"No." I shook my head. "Gordie has wanted to see the White House since we were kids. No way is camping out in the woods gonna compensate for going to Washington. But you guys go. We can hang out next weekend."
A couple of tables down, some kid elbowed his plate off the table and it fell with a deafening crash to the floor. I automatically stood up to clear it and then froze as the world began to swim out of focus.
"You okay?" Chris' firm hand on my arm brought me back to reality. I forced a smile.
"Yeah, I think so. Guess I got up too quick."
By now, Fran had breezed past us and was expertly sweeping up the broken plate pieces. Chris helped me back into my seat and told me to breathe. In a minute or so, the dizziness subsided.
"You sure you're okay? You don't look too good," Chris said when my break was over.
"I'm fine," I assured him, giving him a kiss goodbye.
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Gordie took the news of me having to work real well. I didn't know why I had doubted it, the guy didn't have a selfish bone in his body.
"Have an awesome time," I told Gordie and Chris, hugging them in turn before they got into their shared pontiac. Hours of labour and scrounging for parts had finally come good and both boys were proud of their wheels, a sky blue shimmering sheen of metal, waxed within an inch of it's life.
Chris pulled me tightly into his arms and looked deep into my eyes.
"Feels weird going without you," he whispered, as Gordie climbed into the car.
"Well, you've finally got what you wanted all these years, " I smirked. "Gordo, all to yourself."
"Rather have you all to myself," he grinned.
"Come on, come on, wrap it up, Chambers!" Gordie bellowed from the passenger seat. He had already opened a bag of chips and was crunching noisily.
"Oh yeah, swapping you for him is a real sweet deal." Chris rolled his eyes but laughed as Gordie threw potato chips at us. He gave me a final kiss, climbed into the car and pressed the horn in farewell.
Then they were gone.
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It was a crazy Friday night at the diner.
Clarissa dropped me home around midnight and I felt weird being at Fran's alone, knowing she wasn't coming home, that Chris wasn't coming over. For the first time that I could remember, I actually felt nervous of my own company.
I tossed and turned for much of the night and that led to a shitty Saturday morning where I was late to work and arrived feeling unsettled.
The diner was busy from the get go. There was the early morning rush, then the brunch time rush, then the lunch time rush. I hadn't eaten very much, or sat down at all either so by the time mid afternoon rolled around, I was beat.
"Are you getting me a coke or what?" Ace called from the other side of the room. "What's a guy gotta do to get a little service around here?"
"Not be a jerk off," I muttered, probably a little too loud.
But I went to the counter to collect his coke and walked it across the room to him.
Ace had pulled back since me and Chris had made it up. That didn't mean he didn't drop the odd dig in now and then but he seemed less like he was trying to make my life a misery these days.
"It's about time." he said as I put the coke on the table.
"You're welcome," I responded, turning away.
"Where are my fries?" Vince demanded rudely and although Ace punched him in the arm he still said,
"The service in here sucks."
I spun round to tell him to mind his own business when my legs suddenly went from under me and all I remembered after that was the ground coming up to meet me.
"Christina?"
The voice was tinny and far away.
"Nina, are you okay? Say something."
It was definitely the whiney nasal pitch of Clarissa and i tried to open my eyes but the motion of the room made me feel sick.
"We need to get her to the hospital." That was Sally, maybe, and she sounded worried.
"Well, what'll we do? Lock up?" Clarissa asked.
Then another voice. One way too familiar.
"I'll take her."
Strong hands that I'd felt, that I knew, carried me outside to the car. And when I finally managed to open my eyes and suck in the breeze from the open window, it was Ace Merril's piercing blue eyes looking back at me from the drivers seat.
"You okay?"
I put my head down low into my lap and wrapped my hands around it protectively.
"Don't hurl in the car, alright?"
I wondered how they could have let Ace leave with me. Fran never would have let it happen. But Clarissa was a bimbo and Tim didn't drive.
I tried to tell him I needed to be sick but couldn't get the words out. Fortunately he'd seen me be sick enough to know the signs and pulled over swiftly, rounding the car and opening it wide so I could puke outside.
When I pulled myself back into the car, I felt weaker than ever. I was shaking relentlessly.
"It better not be contagious." He put the car into gear but for a comment so callous he still looked worried.
I said nothing, tucking my head back onto my lap.
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The doctors ran all kinds of tests at the hospital. They took blood, made me pee in a bottle, listened to my chest and looked in my mouth and ears.
"They know what's wrong with you yet?"
I was propped up on pillows when I heard his voice in the room.
"Are you still here?"
He scowled and leaned against the far wall, his white blond hair a spiky mess.
"You're gonna need a ride home."
"I'll get one."
"From who?"
I stopped for a moment and thought about it. There was nobody. Fran was away and Chris and Gordie were away. Even Violet was away.
I wondered how Ace knew how to call my bluff. I guess he would have noticed Fran wasn't in the diner today.
"Chris and Gordie are in Washington," I croaked.
"Yeah, Eyeball was babbling shit about it." Ace shrugged. "Was why I stayed. I can leave though."
He pushed away from the wall and I felt a panic stir inside of me as I realised he was the only person in town who I could call on.
"Ace?"
He was already halfway out the door when I called him and he turned back and tipped his head in question.
"Would you get me a coke from somewhere?"
He looked at me for a couple of seconds, before tipping his head slightly and giving me a curt nod.
He'd been gone about ten minutes when the doctor came in. He stood beside the bed a slight frown on his lips while he asked me how he could get in touch with my parents.
"They're dead," I told him. Which was true. Both my mother and father were deceased.
The doctor frowned some more. He looked down at his notes and then back up at me.
"Are you aware, young lady, that you're pregnant?"
I don't know what made me feel more sick- his words, or the shocked look on Ace's face as he came in behind the doctor with a bottle of coke in hand. Not saying a word, he put the bottle on the side counter and walked straight back out of there.
The doctor continued to talk but I didn't hear a word of it.
It was at that moment, that I knew my life was changed forever.
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There was a loud knock at the door later that night. I ignored it at first. But the knocking went on.
Eventually, i hauled myself off of the sofa and yanked the door open.
Ace stood on the doorstep, his expression uncomfortable.
"What do you want?"
"There's gratitude for you."
I tried to slam the door but he shoved his foot inside, wedging it open. I struggled against him, jamming his foot between the doorway and the door but he stood firm.
"What?" I demanded in exasperation.
Ace put his hand on the door and pushed against it. Despite using both arms to try and stop him, my feet slid across the floor and the door opened far enough that he could step inside.
"Is it mine?"
"What? No!" I could feel my cheeks heating up, burning almost.
Ace closed the door and folded his arms.
"So it's Chambers then?"
"Ace, this is none of your business!" I snapped.
He walked over to Fran's refrigerator and opened it like he'd been living there his whole life. He took out a beer and used his teeth to release the cap.
I stood watching him, too weak and too confused to do anything else. I didn't feel like I had any fight left in me.
"So whatcha gonna do? What happened to you and faggot boy running away to college together?"
His words hit me like a sledge hammer. They were the thoughts that I was trying to ignore.
"We'll make it work," I stammered.
Ace took a swig of his beer and squinted at me.
"C'mon, Nina, you ain't stupid. You know this puts an end to any bullshit college plans. For both of you."
For once, I didn't have any tears, any curses, any raging emotions. I just felt numb. I sat on the edge of the sofa and I watched him lean in Fran's kitchen doorway and drink her beer.
"All Chris wants is to go to college," I whispered finally.
"So maybe it ain't his."
The realisation of that finally struck me. It could just as well be Ace's as it could Chris'. I tried to work out when my last period was and found I couldn't come up with dates. I put my head in my hands in despair.
"And how does that make it any better?"
"So you admit it could be mine?"
I closed my eyes at my slip up but didn't have the energy to try and backtrack.
"Either way, I'm fucked."
Ace cocked his head sideways and stared at me.
"How so? I ain't going nowhere."
His comment was almost surreal. I stared back at him, wondering if he was messing with me, wondering if this was the same Ace who had seduced me to get back at Chris, or if this was the guy who had threatened Stan to ensure I didn't go into a orphanage.
"You don't want a baby. You hate kids."
"True," he said. "But I ain't never gonna turn my back on my own. Not like my Ma did. And I ain't in no big hurry to get out of here. Not like Chambers."
My head was beginning to hurt.
"Ace, what are you saying?"
"What I'm saying is a baby would ruin his life forever. But it wouldn't ruin mine."
I don't know why I couldn't see around what he was saying, that I didn't have some sort of convincing come back, but the truth in it was clear.
"He'd look after me," I said shakily.
Ace shrugged in grudging acceptance.
"Sure, he would. He's a chump. But he'd resent you for it eventually. And the kid. That what you want? A kid with someone who thinks you ruined their life?"
"Ace, get out of here."
"Listen, Christina. I'm making you a serious offer here. One I ain't gonna make a second time. Come back with me. We'll do it properly this time. We'll have the kid. And I'll look after you."
"I want to be with Chris.."
"If you give a shit about him, maybe you should think about what he wants, what that little runt has always wanted- to get out of here."
"You're insane!" I snapped. "It may not even be yours. Why the hell would you want to raise it with me?"
Ace came over and grabbed both my shoulders.
"Because this was meant to happen. Because when we were good, we were good. And because I ain't never stopped thinking about you. But you have to decide. You have to swear on your mother's good name that this secret lives and dies with the both of us. Chambers doesn't come into the picture, the kids mine and thats all there is to it."
I wrenched myself free.
"I love Chris." I repeated. Reminding myself. Holding onto that with cold dead fingers.
Ace snorted.
"You love him but you've fucked his entire life up. Lucky guy."
"Get out," I said in a low, angry voice.
"You ain't never let go of me. Not really. " He leaned back to look at me, beer in his hand, head slightly tilted, and I almost shuddered at the familiarity of him being there.
"Get the hell out." I repeated. "Get the hell out of here and don't breathe a word to anybody."
For a moment, I thought he would refuse. But then he straightened up, put down his beer and walked out.
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A.N: Happy new year to everybody reading! Sorry this update has taken so long, life has kinda gotten in the way.