We had history club the next night. Alex explained that she had to leave early to go to a friend's play with her mom. Ms. Roussau picked Alex up early, and I didn't want to risk an unpleasant conversation with Dr. Linus so I started packing up as well.
"Joan, may I have a word with you?" Dr. Linus asked. I nodded, not looking up from my backpack. "I've been thinking about our conference yesterday, and your mother in particular -"
I braced myself. I knew what was coming. I didn't want to hear it from it.
"I know," I interrupted. "I know she has a drinking problem."
After a few moments of awkward, tense silence, Dr. Linus continued. "I suspected." He now leaned closer to me, reaching across the desk. "I know how hard it must be for you, Joan." He paused. "Is there anything you want to share with me?" I knew what he was suggesting. And it wasn't true.
"My mom doesn't hit me," I snapped.
"Joan," Dr. Linus said, not really buying my previous statement. "You have nothing to hide. There are people who want you to be okay, people who care about you."
"I'm not a victim."
He still looked like he didn't believe me, and I was angry. "I should start walking home," I said, pulling my backpack strap over my shoulder and rising out of my chair.
"It'll be getting dark soon." He had a point. "Why don't I give you a ride home?" he said.
I nodded reluctantly.
"Alright. Let me get my things, and then we'll leave." Soon he was showing me to his car. I didn't really want to talk to him, and Dr. Linus was trying to conceal his emotions. Once we were buckled in, he looked at me and said, "You're going to have to tell me where your house is so I can take you there." I told him without making eye contact. He drove in silence for a while when my stomach growled loudly. I folded my arms, embarrassed, and Dr. Linus laughed quietly. "Hungry?" he asked.
"I guess," I answered. Actually I was ravenous, because I hadn't had lunch and had barely any breakfast. I was also worried, because there wasn't any food at my house.
"I didn't eat my sandwich for lunch today; if you want it, you can have it."
"Yes please," I said, looking around me for the lunch.
"It's in a lunchbox in the back." I reached into the backseat and found the bag. Almost immediately I began eating it.
"I take it you like egg salad sandwiches?" He asked, smiling at the large bites I was taking.
"Actually," I said, "I hate egg salad sandwiches."
Dr. Linus let my words hit the wall in between us. "Do you go hungry often, Joan?" he asked, gently.
I put the sandwich down. "You could say that," I replied. "But that's honestly the worst part." I was rushing my words now, "My mom tries so hard to take care of me and to be a good mom -" I started crying.
Dr. Linus pulled to a stop across the street from my house. "Hey, it's okay. I'm sorry I didn't believe you earlier, but I believe you now." He reached his arm across my shoulders and rubbed my arm gently. He handed me some tissues from his bag. "You're going to be okay. There are people in your life who can look after you and your family if you need it." I managed to stop crying and I blew my nose. Dr. Linus removed his arm and a few seconds later pressed a $50 bill into the palm of my hand.
"I can't take this, you don't have to -"
"You're taking it. Use it for whatever you need. Let me know if you need help."
"Thank you so much, Dr. Linus," I said. "This is all too much."
"Don't mention it," he replied, jotting something down on a piece of paper. "Here's my home and cell phone number. I want you to call me if you ever have any trouble at all. And don't hesitate to talk to me at school." He handed me the paper and pointing to it; said, "This is a list of the time and meeting places for alcoholics anonymous. Those meetings can be very beneficial. And this," now pointing to another spot on the page "is a support group for family and friends of alcoholics. I'd like you to think about going to at least one of those meetings. You'll feel better if you talk about it."
"Thank you. This is really amazing of you."
"You're welcome. Take care, ok?" I nodded as I got out of the car, with his lunch in my hands.
"And Joan," he said as I crossed the empty street. I turned and walked back to him. "My lunch is always available to you."
We shared smiles and I heard him drive away when I opened my door. I went to bed that night feeling conflicted. My conversation with Dr. Linus ended up making me feel better, but I hadn't seen my mom since the night before.
A/N
I'm very sorry to people who've enjoyed thist story; but this is probably the last I'll write of it. I stumbled across my old journal where I had written the beginning of this story, and found that I hadn't published this last part of it yet. So I typed it up; re-wrote some parts of it; and I'm publishing this last chapter for anyone who wants to read it.