Meltdowns ahead. Happy Mother's Day. I figured since I hate spending time with my family, it'd be the perfect time to whip out my laptop and get a move on this belated story. Whoop whoop.
"Just sit," I said, pointing towards the couch.
She timidly walked in the direction of my index finger. "You're not gonna, like… Hold me hostage, right?" she asked, sitting down.
I was about to respond when I heard footsteps trampling down the hallway. I saw Robbie's flushed face appear, his glasses missing, out of breath. Apparently the glasses had a rather large effect, for then he tripped and landed face first on the plush carpet.
"Robbie!" I yelled, grabbing his arm and pulling him up. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," he responded, brushing the dust-bunnies off of his pajama pants.
I took his face in my hands. "Are you sure? Where are your glasses?"
I saw him smile lightly at my overbearing-three-in-the-morning nature. "I'm fine, baby," he said again, bringing my hands back down to my sides.
I relaxed a little bit, my breath slowing down. I was overreacting to everything lately. I guess that if you were in my place, everything would be worthy of overreacting. I suddenly remembered that we weren't alone. I turned to face Tori, who was now standing by the couch. Robbie looked in the direction of my eyesight . He squinted, his eyes hardly making out the figure in the corner. But he knew who it was.
He jumped to conclusions. Practically jumped down her throat. "Why are you here? How long have you been here?"
"Robbie," I grabbed his face again. "You need to calm down."
"I am calm!" he shouted. He lowered his voice. "I am calm," he tried again.
Tori bud in. "Robbie, it's really not what you think…"
Robbie put my hands down again. "How would you know what I think? You wanna know what I really think? I don't think anything. I legitimately believe that if a big lightning bolt struck through my house right now and destroyed everything, I would find it completely normal. You wanna know why? Because the amount of garbage I've gone through today is just so…"
"Robbie!" I interrupted, grabbing his wrists. I felt all the anxiety building up inside me. I just didn't know that Robbie was this screwed up, too. Tori was sitting down again, cowering in fear. I turned my head to face him. He was still squinting at Tori. I grabbed his chin and locked my eyes with his. "Look at me," I tightened my hold on his chin. "She doesn't. Know. Everything." I looked at her again, then back to Robbie. "But we're gonna tell her."
He started shaking his head. "No, no you can't."
"Robbie. This is my problem, and I'm sorry you got roped into it, but I need her help and this is not your responsibility," I said calmly, trying to slow his heartbeat.
It obviously wasn't working yet. "Cat, you are my responsibility, I'm not going to let you let this get out of hand," he rambled, taking a step closer to me.
I can ramble just as bad, though. "And how long have you known Tori? What, three years? You don't think that Tori is my friend? You don't think that Tori is your friend? You don't think that she's a trustworthy person?"
I could sense that Tori was feeling supremely awkward, due to the fact that we were talking about her like she wasn't there. She would get used to it.
Robbie continued. "I never said that, Cat. I never said that she wasn't a trustworthy person, but this is your life. This is everything, you can't tell people everything," he sneered through clenched teeth.
"I trusted you with everything!" I yelled.
"Yeah, you did, and look at where you are now! You think that I have any more of a clue of what I'm doing than you already do?" he snapped.
"No! No, I don't think you have a clue! But you wanna know why I told you? Because I am just so sick of doing this alone. Robbie, I was alone. And now I'm not, so no, I don't have any regrets that I told you, because guess what, you deserved to know because this involves you and I actually believe that Tori can help me, or help us, with this, now why don't you pull your head out of your butt and wake up!" I shouted, not taking breaks to use unnecessary breaths.
I could sense Robbie was starting to regain his bearings during my speech. By the time I was done, he was hugging me to his chest, slowly lowering himself to the floor, taking me with him. And I was sobbing vehemently. "It's okay, you're all right, it's okay, baby, it's okay," was all I could hear above the white noise in my head. I could feel him rocking me back and forth on the floor, his arms wrapped around me, my face buried in his chest. "You're okay," he said, stroking the matted hair on the back of my head.
"No!" I screamed bloody murder, wrapping my arms around his neck tightly, almost strangling him. "NO!"
I need my mom and dad. I need them. I can't take it, I need my mom and dad. I need them. I need them. I need them.
As much as I feel bad for what I'm doing to Cat, I kind of feel worse for Tori and her awkward bystander position. Lol. Review it like it's hot. Oh, and if I don't update that often, it's because I have a new pit bull to train. The vet was hilarious, though. "Well, you're a pit bull! But I'm gonna write down 'boxer mix'! Ya know, just for insurance reasons." Laughin' my apples off.