Thanks to all the members of The Fanfiction Forum for all the rules of this list.
81) This is just a reminder: Gensoukyou is not Cpt. Takamachi's "training grounds".
81a) It is most likely not a relic of Al Hazard, either. Further research into the subject, while not explicitly forbidden, will not receive TSAB funding.
82) Patchouli Knowledge is allowed occasional supervised access to the Infinity Library. Kirisame Marisa is most emphatically not.
83) Following the Cross Gate Incident, research into the creation of humanoid mechanized weaponry - so-called "Super Robots" - is no longer prohibited. The assistance of the former members of Riot Force 6 is hereby requested in this matter.
83a) Andou Masaki is to be given an escort wherever he goes when in TSAB facilities. Last time, it took forever for him to get to Cybuster.
83b) We are opening diplomatic discussions with La Gias effective immediately.
84) All contacts between the TSBA and the group of magical girls known as the Tokyo MewMew are now forbidden. We DO NOT WANT for them to acess to our spells and for the Aces/Wolkenritter/Riot Force 6 to become hybrid human/animals. The tough of a catgirl Nanoha has scared our senior officers, for Pete's Sake!!!
85. We don't care how much Lutecia Aplhine's personality change unnerves you, you are not allowed to requisition one of the time-traveling Lost Logia to prove, (and in the case of the later possibilities, prevent), she is:
1) Identical Twins, who use illusion magics to keep whichever one lost the most recent game of chance hidden;
2) A badly prepared clone replacement;
3) A split personality;
4) Possessed by a Lost Logia; or
5) A twisted maniac, trying out various personalities to fuck with our heads.
86) We are beginning negotiations with Seyruun, but it is still forbidden to have informal contact. We really do not want Xellos or Naga running around unsupervised, or heaven forbid, Lina.
86a) WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THAT NANOHA AND LINA ARE HAVING A COMPATITION BETWEEN STARLIGHT BREAKER VS DRAGON SLAVE!?!
86b) Results are in. On a one-to-one power scale, Starlight Breaker wins. However, in terms of sheer wide-area damage, Dragon Slave is the more powerful.
86c) Following this, Lina Inverse is hereby banned from interacting with any world other than her own without having several Limiters put on.
87) All TSAB personnel are forbidden, unless given specific permission, from visiting the area of dimension space home to the Artificially Intelligent tanks known as "Bolos." Firstly, these demonstrate the logical conclusion of projectile based weaponry, something already banned under TSAB law, and secondly, we don't want Cpt. Takamachi getting ideas about Raging Heart getting a Hellbore mode upgrade.
88) For reasons of moral there will be no teaching Intelligent or Unison Devices to sing "Still Alive"
88a) Yes Lt. Col Yagami the Wolkenritter did look cute singing it as a quartet at the charity talent show, but frankly the lyrics started freaking people who recognized them as your Knights.
89) After some incidents concerning certain individuals who will remain anonymous, the Fangirl/boy Talk (upper case, bold and underline) is now mandatory for all the staff's members.
90) Would the person who read their Icha Icha Paradise in front of Vivio please report Captain Takamichi and Enforcer Harlown-Takamichi; all other personnel please evacuate to the nearest Starlight Breaker Bunker.
91 ) While Sheila Silvear is very thankful to whomever taught her shape-changing magic, please be advised that going to Jade is not, always, in our best interests.
91 A ) Oh, so it was someone using shape-changing magic on her.
91 B ) Great, now we have Rook to deal with.
91 C ) Will someone please deal with that teleporting undead knight?
91 D ) Preferably before Vita has an aneurysm from trying to play "whack the knight".
91 E ) WHO GAVE SUBARU A BETA-TECH PHANTOM RING?!
91 F ) You didn't see what happened when a Werecheetah used one of those things, did you?
91g) On further consideration of the fact that a Beta Ring seems to have permanently affixed itself to PFC Subaru Nakajima's Revolver Knuckle and integrated inextricably with Mach Caliber and grafted itself to her cybernetics, further forbidding of such technology is herefore recognized as futile. However, we must insist that Miss Nakajima restrain herself from using her new "Divine Phantom" spell near populated areas.
91h) And Beta tech is still restricted from everyone else, let's just make that very clear.
92: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
92a: Vita is not allowed to bring her boyfriend to work anymore.
93: A note to all summoner-class mages: summoning of Dremora in TSAB administered space is hereby forbidden. Permanently.
93) The Chenobal Exclusion Zone is strictly off-limits. The Zone is known to react violently to TSAB personal, generating Emissions which are lethal. Local Mutants will seek and attack any and all TSAB personal, and hostile natives have been seen deploying advanced mass-based weaponry in response to TSAB intrusions.
94) A reminder from chief medical officer Shamal. It is not in your best interest to attempt to woo Vivio Takamichi in her adult form. It will result in slowly healing injuries as she has been ordered that "Injuries sustained from mistaking an eight year old for an eighteen year old is still considered an act of attempted statutory rape, and as such are not to be healed by any means."
94a) Hitting on Vita on the other hand is just plain asking for it.
96) The Lovely Angels (aka the Dirty Pair) are hereby forbidden to step foot on any TSAB administered territory, and a standing order is given for their immediate execution when seen on said territory.
97) Xellos Metallium is not allowed travel through TSAB territories. Last thing we need is to deal with the Mazoku.
98) Retired Admiral Lindy Harlown would like to see Yuuno Scrya concerning the incident that happened in the Infinite Library two months ago.
98a) FERRET BOY!!
98 B ) I'd like you to know that wasn't my fault. -YS
98 C ) Tell me some more about how much you can't keep your hands off of me. - LH
98d) You'd think Chrono would realize by now that snatching up hot young men is tradition among us Harlaown women. -Amy
98e) You weren't a Harlaown before you got your hooks in, dear. –CH
98f) In blood, no. In spirit... well, the results speak for themselves, no? -LH
98 g) So where does that leave Enforcer Fate? - Anonymous TSAB Elite Mook
98 h) There is to be no further speculation on the ability for Harlaown women to snatch up hot young men. Anyone who wishes to further contribute to the topic will be subjected to overseeing the flame war that will inevitably break out.
98i) Besides, Caro got her hooks into Erio before "Fate-mama" coulllllllllllllllllllllllll
98j) We need a cleanup team and a coroner at Terminal 1138, on the double!
99) Whoever has summon the creature know as Sin is requested to send it back, BEFORE NOW!!!
100) There is no research to collect the Necronomicon or the Bakanomicon. We do not want a native-zombie invasion or an extradimensional-zombie invasion.
100a) Retired Captain Miho, we are speaking to you!
100b ) All TSAB officers are hereby notified to destroy the Hentainomicon on sight.
100c) Too late.
101) Further research into the so-called "Loud G-Stones" is to be halted, as PFC Subaru's presence seems to be having a deleterious effect on their function.
101 A ) G-Stones, likewise, are not to be researched upon.
101 B ) Same with J-Jewels
101 C ) 101 A has now been revoked as it turns out that Blitz, Mach and Jet Calibur were processed from fragmented G-Stones.
101 D ) Further review turns out that they were fragmented G-Crystals not Stones.
102) Mr. Scrya, while not technically a member of the TSAB, is still a member of Midchildan society. As such, he is encouraged to refrain from dancing and celebrating in public, especially on the subject of how he "knew his son would end up catching a good woman someday!"
103 ) While Subaru has used both Revolver Gauntlets on her arms, it should be noted that she, Nove and Ginga are forbidden from putting all four Gauntlets on at the same time. Seriously, we do not want to know what happens when two arm gauntlets and two leg gauntlets work together.
103a) You were supposed to be confined to quarters, Finieno, not "experimenting."
103b) PFC Nakajima, the activation of Mach Calibur's new "G-Calibur" mode is hereby restricted to crisis scenarios only, as per TSAB power limitation protocols.
104 ) Wendi is to return the Silver Surfer's surfboard IMMEDIATELY!
104 A ) Oh, it's just a replica, that's not so bad then.
104 B ) Wendi Nakajima is to stop writing in these rules to cover up what she has done.
104 C ) The Silver Surfer is here and asking for his board back. We do not want Galactus coming here.
105 ) Enforcer Fate is to return KITT back to its original owner.
106 ) Teana Lanster is hereby ordered to return all "ARMS" back to Non-Administered Planet 324, known to its inhabitants as Filgaia.
107) Will someone please get the Paper Masters out of my library? Organizing this mess is hard enough without a horde of crazed bibliophiles who never reshelve things properly!
107a) And tell Miss Readman that this library doesn't lend or sell.
108) In effect immediately will be a resource conservation policy. You cannot appropriate office material for the creation of elaborate cosplay costumes
108a) Hayate, this means you.
108b) You too Readman. And your entourage as well.
109) Whoever introduced Vita to Rammstein is going to pay for last night
109a) Feur frei!-Vita
110) Hayate, would you please stop trying to let a certain Kamina become a member of the TSAB
110a) Too late
110b)With this drill, I shall pierce the heavens- the great Kamina-sama
110c)He's mine!-Vita
110d) No way Vita. You always get the badasses. Let someone else have a turn-Signum
111) To whoever introduced the Cute Shotaro Boy trope to Shamal, you're paying for Erio's therapy bill.
112) The person who has introduced Agito and Etna will pay. With his life. -Overlord Laharl and others.
113) No one should even suggest to bringing together Riot Force 6 and the Eleventh Squad of Gotei 13: Our insurance does not pay such level of damages.
114) Enforcer Fate and Captain Takamachi are forbidden to adopt Sabaku no Gaara and/or Naruto Uzumaki. Or any other Jinchuuriki.
115) Hayate, just... no. You can't shoot J. or Masashi Kishimoto, even if they deserve it.
115a) The fact you are a fan of the Harry/Hermione and the NaruHina parings is not a valid excuse.
116 ) Whoever said that Rein was as annoying as Navi, you can come here and apologize to her. - Hayate
116 A ) Bring lots of chocolate. - Shamal
116 B ) And prepare for pain. - Vita
116 C ) I don't like seeing her cry. - Zafira
116 D ) Turn yourself in now and you might get out of this alive - Signum
116 E ) Can I burn them? - Agito
117) No, Ms Readman, Subaru is not related to your ex-boyfriend. Will you please go away?
118) The manuscript for the revised edition of How to Win Friends and Influence People being written by Captain Takamachi is to be confiscated and burned.
120) Hayate, please leave your cosplay outfits at home. Captain Takamichi almost died of Ofactual Enxanguanation from your "Dominatrix Catgirl" outfit you gave to Enforcer Fate.
121)Vita, please stop drawing those creppy rabbits on-GAH
121a) Clean up in Hanger 114a
122) All ships going and coming to and from 'Earth' are to be subjected to extreme level of search for unauthorized personnel. That stowaway problem we've been having is just getting ridiculous.
123) Ranma Saotome is to return Durandal to Admiral Chrono Harlown immediately.
123a) What do you mean it bonded with you ? Durandal is a merely a Storage Device, not an...
123b)Okay, who is the complete dunderhead who FORGOT to remove the "upgrades" that Brianna Digger gave Durandal, including its shinny, Peebo like AI ?!
124) Ranma Saotome and Signum are henceforth forbidden from sparring while using Durandal and Agito ever again. Not only did the two of you manage to completely total our brand new virtual training ground with that giant tornado, the sight of the two of you going at it right there in the middle of the training ground all but traumatized Erio and Caro.
124a) would Sgt. Ranma Saotome please report to visitor's lobby. There is a group of angry people here that wish to speak to you. Something about uniting the schools.
124b) I thought we had a rule against recruiting them?
125) Hayate Yagami and Tomoyo Daidouji should never be allowed to plot together, EVER.
125a) Fate you are to return that Suiseiseki cosplay costume back.
125b) But it looks so cute on Vivio.
126) All use of various Bind-type spells for sexual purposes by on-duty TSAB officers, or on TSAB administrative premises, is no longer permitted.
126a) You're grounded, Chrono. -LH
126b) I am a grown man and an Admiral in my own right, Mother. You can't ground me. -CH
126c) No, but I can. -Amy
126d) I'm a bit disappointed in you, Brother. -FTH
126 E ) Does that mean Raising Heart's Dominatrix Mode is now outlawed? -NT
126f) There's probably a loophole or two in there somewhere. –HY
127 ) No, Caro, summon bigger fish is not a legitimate summoning technique. Don't listen to the insane Jedi.
128: Samus Aran, please stop chasing Caro. She cannot actually summon Ridley.
128a: .....What do you mean she can?!
128b) Caro, please try to remember that there is a vast difference between "can" and "should".
129) Sgt. Ranma Saotome and Cpt. Nanoha Takamachi are henceforth forbidden from ever again participating in a joined training exercise. The bill for the three entire platoons of commando you manage to traumatize will be deducted from your pay. They still tend to go into panic attack the sight of anything pink.
129a) Hey, don't pin that one on me, it's not my fault for once ! HE was the one who used the bubble gum ! N.T.
129b) Bubble gum ? What in the... Wait, you know what ? We REALLY do not want to know.
130.) No member of the TSAB may violate the time-space continuum to attract the attention of unspeakable elder gods.
130a.) Especially not in order to have a good fight!
131.) As a transtellar military organization, bureaucracy is the lifeblood of our success. Everyone has to do their paperwork, no exceptions.
131a.) No, causing general wide-spread mayhem while fighting an incursion of transdimensional flesh-eating robo beetles does not exempt you from this.
131b.) Clarification: Causing widespread mayhem means you get to do a considerably bigger amount of paperwork than you would usually have to .
132) Rule 130 is hereby extended to include Mazoku, Shinzoku, LoN and alternative universe-ascended version of the Loopers.
132a)Never Mind...We were too late again...
133) Takamichi Nanoha is not to the planet Gunsmoke, their insurance polocies are already through the roof.
133a)What do you mean "Late again" ?!
Jointed rule 394/746/134) The person who has suggested a brainstorming between Kisuke Urahara, Mayuri Kurotsuchi, Severus Snape, Hermione Granger, Orochimaru, Kabuto Yakushi, Jail Scaglietti and Vita of the Wolkenritter is to kill on sight with charges for crimes against the OMNIversal health.
135 ) What rule are we on anyway? - SN
135 A ) Fixed for you. - TL
136 ) Subaru Nakajima and Teana Lanster, you two are NOT to have hot kinky sex while writing the rules down, regardless of the morale that you're giving the yuri-lovers around here.
137) Conctacts between Riot Force 6 and the Sailor Senshi are now forbidden for obvious reasons.
138) Captain Takamachi, you may not hire on Samantha Carter as an independent contractor. We really don't need her and Brianna working within the same think tank.
138a.) Medics to the sparring ring. Sgt. Saotome and Ronnon Dex, well the less said the better.
139) Yuuno Scrya you may not apply for an internship with Dr. Jackson.
139a) Whoever thought it was a good idea to put colonel O'Neil and Admiral Harlown in the same room, Amy Harlown has a few choice words for you.
140: Hey, Larry! What's the idea, naming me after you?! And why are we both girls now?!
140a: Uh. Looks like Ixy's awak-
140b: Hey buddy. Still alive?
140c: Due to yesterday's events, the "King of Belka" and the "Demon Lord of the Round Table" are not allowed to fight each other again. Ever. And yes, you're both paying to rebuild those training grounds.
140d: Also: Spanish guitars are hereby banned.
140e: And Captain Takamachi is not allowed to have a ribbon on her barrier jacket anymore.
140f) But I've always had it since I started using magic to blow st-er, cast spells. -NT
141. TSAB Officers are now forbidden to interact with any planes that originate from the multiverse of Dominia.
141a. Can someone please get Niv-Mizzet out of the Infinity Library?
142.) Visitors to the Infinite Library must at no time call the occasionally appearing Orang-Utan an animal, unless they can survive having their heads torn off.
143.) Visitors are encouraged not to call Officers Lanster or Testarossa "Psycho Lesbian". The TSAB disavows all responsiblity for the fate of anyone who does so.
143a. For the record, the 'Psycho Lesbian' trope applies when the love that a woman carries towards the object of her affections causes more trouble than it's worth (especially if they hound their loved one). As there has been no evidence of such concerning the two officers in question, labeling them as 'Psycho Lesbians' would be incorrect.
144.) It is prohibited to give a certain group of cardinals dressed in red access to any form of TSAB transportation device.
a.) "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition in mid childa"
b.) The exception to the rule being to transport them away from mid childa or other administrated worlds.
145.) Someone please tell the supposed 'King of the Britain' that he cannot have the lost logia known as the holy grail.
a.) While we're at it someone stop those french guys with the catapult from launching farm animals around mid childa.
145b. The Frenchmen are to be designated as a secondary issue to be resolved later. All TSAB officers are hereby notified to be on the lookout for the "Dread Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog" to capture and/or kill it.
145c. We are more than perfectly capable of handling such a beast and will not be requiring the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. Your offer of assistance is however appreciated, King Arthur.
145d. OH, SWEET MOTHER OF JES-
145e. The previous order to capture the Killer Rabbit is rescinded. All officers are ordered to treat this as a highly, dangerous beast to be killed on sight.
145f. Can someone please explain how this Killer Rabbit just became Vivio's pet? -NT
146.) No one in the TSAB may practice Jashanism. Period.
147) Mid-childa is a religously neutral area. As such any paramilitary orginization that is a devout follower to any sect of religion is here by fire upon with any and all brutality. Hellsing and Iscariot we are looking at you and we do have the technology to wipe out your secret weapons agents.
148) All conctacts between TSAB and the Autobots are to be maked CAREFULLY. We do not want to anger them.
148a) And no, nobody can recruit Grimlock and the Dinobots. PERIOD!
149 ) Whoever pulled Genesic GaoGaiGar, 3G, and the J-Ark out of the collapsing dimension, thank you.
149 A ) Now we just have to deal with Subaru fusing Mach Calibur to a G-Stone.
149 B ) And Nove fusing Jet Calibur with a J-Jewel.
150.) Thanks to whoever found the "holy hand grenade" the beast is now contained.
150.a) A warning to whoever found the "holy hand grenade", run!
150b) Seriously, you killed Vivio's bunny. Both Vivio and Sacred Heart cried. There is no saving you. Doesn't matter if it was a murderous hellbeast, you made them cry. You're the walking dead, now.
151. In relation to rule 58, the TSAB is not a party to the CONCORD Accords. As such, you are not allowed to interfere in the affairs of any of the four Empires, CONCORD, the Jovians, any rats, and all caspuleers.
151a. That also means no shooting first at them for any reason. We do not want our ships to get CONCORDed, people. Note that this stops applying if they shoot first.
152. In relation to rule 140c, anyone from the world known as Strangereal (native, reincarnated or otherwise) are not allowed to fight each other.
152a. Also, no recreating any superweapons from Strangereal. And if you do, you are most definitely NOT allowed to upgrade them with Mid-Childian technology. Those things are bad enough without it...
153) Under the advisement of Sgt. Saotome, access to Nerima, Tokyo (and there by the Nerima Wrecking Crew) is now locked. The shear number of ways you can be humiliated there would reflect badly on us.
153a) No, Enforcer Harlown-Takamichi, I don't care if they do fight dirty, you aren't going back.
153b) Anyone who ecounters android catgirls or Sanzinen family butlers is advised to retreat at once.
153c) This now extends to Minato ward. Don't fuck with the senshi, no matter how silly they look, Planetary mana taps are not to be trifled with.
153d) No, Hayate, you can't join them.
153e) Part b has been rescinded as Pr. Nuku Nuku claims that it is discriminatory against her.
153f) DAMMIT! Part b was meant to keep her out!
53g) Screw it, nobody go to Tokyo unless you live there, tis a silly place.
153h) Wait, let me guess, too late?
154) Shamal, performing physical exams on Sgt. Saotome without his consent, let alone using it to have your way with him, is hereby banned. Not only because it was an abuse of authority, but Signum wrecking the place after finding out about it really set us back on our medicinal supplies.
154a) Yes, that includes surprise physical exams Shamal.
155) Head Librarian Yuuno Scrya is never to go on a dig on a new, unexplored world without a proper escort ever again. We are getting tired of his tendency to stumble over powerful Lost Logia then MISPLACE them and the repeated attempt groom-nap.
155a) Sgt. Saotome is not to be Yuuno Scrya's escort ever again. Their combined might only make things even worse.
156) Admiral Chrono Harlown, Sgt. Ranma Saotome and Head Librarian Yuuno Scrya are not be part of any diplomatic mission if the opposing party include young, single and politically powerful women. Neither Amy, nor Signum and certainly not Nanoha and Fate were amused by the result last time it happened.
156a) And the less said about Vivio almost losing her favorite "uncles" the better.
157) Do not imply that Signum and Lamia Loveless are sister in the hearing range of either of them. You will not like the result.
157a) I know that these two are fierce rivals, but could someone ask them, nicely, to stop trashing our training grounds one after another ? Those thing are NOT cheap. Nor easy or fast to make.
158) And neither should you imply any kind of relationship between Signum and Ivy useless you really want them to use those Snake Sword of their on you.
159) Signum, you are not autorized to challenge Kenpachi Zaraki to a tag match, with Alucard and Guts as partner for the same match: you have scared to death the Yggdrasil System, and after that Skuld has vented her displeasure on US!!!
160) Shamal and Ritsuko Akagi are no longer allowed in the same room together... Bad things happen.
160a) it is requested that Hayate return the Evangelion pilots plugsuits immediately and stop complaining that the chests are too tight.
160b) it is to be noted that Shinji Ikari is indeed male