Not Worth It
Chapter 7
Merope's Makeover
A week went by after Merope visited Ollivander's wand shop. Her dreams, thankfully, were no longer depressing. She dreamed of her son as an infant. The staff of the orphanage was caring for him as much as the other children. As the dreams of her infant son continued, Merope noticed that the matron sometimes stated that the newborn baby was "funny " because he hardly ever cried. Some of the staff didn't mind the child's behavior, because all the other children cried often. All babies were different but as time went on, Merope thought it was a little strange herself. Her son didn't cry for attention. He did not cry for food. He did not cry when he was needed to be changed. Certainly he would cry when he was uncomfortable, wouldn't he? But he didn't. When he was hungry, he had a hungry look in his eye. It reminded Merope when her father looked at the last piece of meat on the table. When young Tom had soiled himself, he had a look of disgust on his face. It shockingly reminded Merope of Tom Riddle looked at her when the love potion wore off.
The only time when the baby cried was when the staff tried holding him. The moment the staff put it down it would stop crying. It wanted to be alone. It hated to be touched. Dreaming of the son she might have made Merope want Tom Riddle more. If she was careful enough, she could get him to stay with her and they would raise the child together.
She kept track of the times when he would go up and down the lane, and stand on the road. The first few times she couldn't open her mouth, but stood there like a statue. In a day or two she was able to mumble a greeting to him that he never returned. There were times when he was in company with Ceceilia Roberts. Cecelia intimidated her but somehow Merope even greeted the lady she envied.
"Morning, sir Riddle," Merope said. "Madam Roberts." Merope attempted a curtsy, but bent down so low that she lost her balance and fell.
The haughty couple roared with laughter. Merope pressed her face in the dirt to hide her embarrassment.
"Little waif," tittered Cecelia. "You'll never be a lady!"
Tom and Ceceila rode off, still laughing. Merope's attempts weren't improving, but she still had time. Merope pushed herself up from the ground and went inside to sulk for a while. Maybe Ceceila was right. Merope was a waif and Merope had no chance of becoming a lady. She looked her face over in the bathroom mirror. It was too heavy. Too plain. Too pale. She didn't turn the heads of the men in the village, at least not in her direction. They looked the other way.
To get her mind off her pitiful attempt to talk to Tom, she took a trip to Diagon Alley to get more potion ingredients. Shopping at Diagon Alley always seemed to cheer her up. Because she was a frequent buyer, Merope got rewards and she could use those rewards to receive discount on all her purchases. In no time, Merope's cellar would begin to look a lot like the apothecary.
"See you again soon!" said Rebecca, the owner of the apothecary.
After stepping out of the shop, Merope looked down the alley and saw people step through the wall separating Diagon Alley from the muggle side of London. Remembering places from her dreams with Tom, she decided to pay London a visit. She looked at the home where she and Tom spent their short year of marriage. She visited the shops and restaurants they visited. If she played her cards right, she and Tom would indeed do everything she dreamed of and more. She wouldn't lose him. She wouldn't have to sell all her belongings, even her cherished wedding ring, just to survive. They would remain at their home in London and they would raise their child together.
Merope entered one of her favorite stores from the dreams and she found herself in the health and beauty section. There were beauty products left and right. Face cream. Make up. Nail polish. Hair dye. They reminded her of something Emily told her. Cecelia had insulted Merope by calling her ugly, and Emily by calling her fat. Though Merope was offended, Emily wasn't. She retorted by saying that Merope could get a makeover and Emily could lose weight. Merope felt a smile creeping to her face. Despite Emily being an overweight, bespectacled muggleborn, Merope learned loads of things from her. She learned about more out spells, how to keep her house looking nice and getting self-confidence. With a makeover, maybe Merope wouldn't' even need the love potion. If she made herself prettier, not only would it turn Tom's head, but the heads of the rest of the men in the village. Of course, Tom Riddle was the only man for her, but if Tom saw that everyone else started to find Merope pretty, he would too.
'If this works, Emily,' Merope thought as she loaded her arms with beauty products, 'and I still marry Tom Riddle, I'll make you my maid of honor!'
Merope rushed home to take the mother of all bubble baths. She put on one of her new dresses and then applied the blond hair dye to her head. Since Cecelia was blonde, Merope believed Tom fancied blondes. If Merope was a blonde too, wouldn't that help her chances with Tom? While she waited for the dye to set in, she moved on to the makeup.
Having never used makeup, she had no idea what she was doing. She read the instructions many times and the names of the products did indicate where on her face. Lipstick on lips. Eyeliner and eye shadow on eyes. If there weren't instructions she would have no idea where to apply the blush. Merope applied the makeup, more than she was supposed to. Her lips were so red they looked like they were bleeding. The rouge on her cheeks looked as though it had been smeared on. She couldn't decide on what color eye shadow to use, so she mixed them all and pasted them from the bottom on her eyelids to top her eyebrows. She used so much face powder it looked like a bag of flour blew up in her face. She heated up the block of mascara and used her wand to put on her eyelashes.
She rinsed out her hair and because her hair was so long, there was only blonde in some parts of her hair. It didn't matter. Merope had blonde in her hair now.
Merope's face felt a little heavy, and it was hard to move her face. She thought that was normal. She looked different so she believed that she was beautiful. After looking at the new person in the mirror for a minute or two, she left her house and walked to town.
People did stop and stare and Merope believed they were taken in by her new beauty. Some people laughed but no one had the heart to tell her she had too much makeup on. She was passing by the constable's home and saw Kevin pruning an apple tree.
"Good afternoon, Kevin," said Merope.
"Ah, good afternoon," Kevin turned from his work and looked at Merope. She smiled at him and he saw traces of lipstick on her teeth. He laughed and Merope thought he was laughing because he was happy to see her, just as she thought the other people were laughing. Kevin put the tree limbs into a wheelbarrow and approached her, still chuckling.
"M-Merope?" he said.
She nodded. He stared and shook his head. "Sorry—you remind me of the time my sister first got into my mother's makeup bag."
"Yes?" Merope said. "Did she look beautiful? Like me?"
Kevin laughed. "Well, she sure looked different, like you do. Now I may not be an expert in makeup, but it looks like you have far too much on."
"Too much?" Merope said. "How can there be too much? It's supposed to make me pretty."
Merope touched her cheek and then looked at her finger. There were speckles of pink and white from the rouge and powder. Merope was ugly and she knew it. She the thought that the uglier someone was, the more makeup they had to use.
"Do I…look bad?" Merope covered her face. Oh what if she was standing in front of the squire's son right now? What would he do? What would he say? Merope felt close to tears. Putting on makeup seemed so easy. Any woman could do it. Merope couldn't do anything right.
"First time putting on makeup, eh?" said Kevin. "You know, my mother is a cosmetologist. She can teach you how to put it on properly. Come on in."
Merope slowly followed Kevin inside the house. It wasn't as big as the Riddle manor, but it was bigger than Merope's squalid cottage. Of course, all the houses in the village were bigger than the Gaunt home. She could probably fit her house inside their livign room. The home of the Hales was warm and inviting and practical. It also seemed familiar. Has she been here before?
"Mother, you don't have an appointment today do you?" Kevin called.
"No, why?" came Mrs. Hale's voice.
"Because you have a customer," he said.
"Who?"
"Merope Gaunt," he said.
"Merope…Marada's daughter?" Mrs. Hale said. "Be right down."
Mrs. Hale came down the stairs. She was indeed pretty. She had the same sandy hair as Kevin, only it had a few curls. Her eyes were green and she was slightly petite. She tried to hold back a laugh as she got a closer look at Merope.
"Oh my," she said. "It's like the time Lora got into my makeup."
"That's what I thought," said Kevin.
"So sweet of you to go through this all trouble just to impress Kevin," Mrs. Hale teased.
Merope looked down. Kevin flinched. "Mother!"
Mrs. Hale chuckled and then took Merope by the hand. She led her up the stairs. "Come on, dear. We've got work to do!"
Merope glanced back at Kevin, whose cheeks were about as red as hers. He clumsily walked out of the door to return to the yard work.
"I'm sorry about this," said Merope. "I'm just...so ugly. I thought the more I put on the prettier I'd be."
Mrs. Hale put her hands on her hips. "No woman is ugly. There's natural beauty in all women. You just need an extra bit of help finding it, that's all."
Merope shrugged. She wasn't convinced. Natural beauty? In her?
"Don't worry," said Mrs. Hale. "It might be a little difficult but I love a challenge. I wish I had the chance to give your mother a makeover. Oh well, she would be happy, I'm sure."
After removing the pound of makeup off Merope's face, Mrs. Hale stepped back to study her face and hair. "Well, you certainly missed some parts in your hair. Trying to go blonde?"
Merope nodded and Mrs. Hale picked up a few pieces of her hair. "It is a little dull and heavy isn't it? Too much to care for?"
"Yes," said Merope.
"What do you think about going shorter?" Mrs. Hale showed her a beauty magazine of different hairstyles. "Or I can show you how to keep it away from your face."
Merope looked at the pictures. There were all sorts of different hair styles. Her hair was indeed long and heavy, too much for her to care for. Some of the hairstyles looked too short. She saw a picture of woman that reminded her of Cecelia. Blond hair, chin length, wavy. Merope pointed at it.
"Like that," she said.
"I think we can manage that," said Mrs. Hale with a smile. She washed Merope's hair and then made sure to put plenty of conditioner in it so that it was easy to comb. She cut it the way Merope asked then fixed the botched hair dye job. She showed her how to use rollers to make her hair wavy.
"There, that's better, isn't it?" said Mrs. Hale. "When the blonde fades, I can add a touch up. Highlights would be pretty too, if a little light is what you're looking for."
Mrs. Hale grabbed her manicure set and examined Merope's fingers. "Your fingers look a lot like your mother's."
"They do?" Merope raised an eyebrow.
"Not just the shape of them, but I remember they were stained like this. I think whatever your mother puts in her tonics stains her fingers. Do you make home remedies too?"
Merope nodded. "I can get you some."
"I may take you up on that," she said. "When the cold and flu season gets here." After giving her fingers a good srub, she pushed back the cuticles and filed Merope's fingernails.
"I remember the first time you came to our home. You were just a little girl. Your mother came to do some repairs and cleaning. I was pregnant with Lora at the time so I couldnt' do much. You and Kevin became fast friends."
"We did?" Merope mumbled. "I don't remember."
"Ah, you were children," she said, waving her hand with the nail file. "Kevin invited you to play so I didn't have to watch him while your mother worked and I could get some rest. You came every time your mother to work for us, or give us medicine. Poor Kevin was so sad when had to leave."
"He was?"
She nodded. "Kevin's always sad when his friends have to go home. Oh, and after your mother passed, you no longer came to play and he was so heartbroken."
"I'm so sorry," Merope said.
"Not your fault," he said. "He was afraid of your father and your brother. He wanted to see you, was too scared to go out there and there was no way my husband would take him. Steven didn't want to go out there unless he really had to."
"Like when my father started a fight with someone," Merope said with a frown.
Mrs. Hale nodded as she reached for some nail polishes. "Must've been awful living with them. Marada didn't speak of your family life much, but I could tell she wasn't too happy to be married to your father. You know, she said the money she was making from helping people in the village was going to your school fund, but I reckon she was also planning on leaving your father."
"She would run away? And leave Morfin and and me with my father?"
"Oh, I think she would've taken you," Mrs. Hale said. She compared Merope's skin tone to several nail colors and then decidied on a pale pink. "I wouldn't have blamed her if she had left your father and taken you with her. I paid her generously so she'd have the means to make her getaway. Such a shame she didn't get that chance."
"I don't remember much after my mother died," said Merope. "I don't even know how she died. My father said that some mu—men killed her."
"He told you what—oh-I'm sorry!" Merope's remark caused Mrs. Hale to get paint all over Merope's fingertip. She quickly wiped it off. "You thought your mother was murdered? By someone in the village?"
Merope nodded. "Is that what happened?"
"Your mother didn't have any enemies in the village as far as I know," said Mrs. Hale. "Steven tried assign your father but he didn't give him details either. Said he found her dead in the woods Would't let Steven look at her body. Yoru father already buried her. Steven always thought it was fishy, but there wasn't much he could do."
"D-do you think he could try and find out if someone had killed my mother?"
"Oh it was so long ago," said Mrs. Hale. "But I'll talk to him about it. I'd like to know myself to tell you the truth."
She finished painting Merope's nails and let them dry.
"Now then, let's get started with your face." She picked up a pair of tweezers and began plucking Merope's eyebrows. Though it was painful, Merope stayed still and allowed her to continue. It was all for Tom. Merope would withstand whatever pain she had to win his heart. She added gray eye shadow to Merope's eyelids and instead of using mascara, put false eyelashes right above her own.
"If you don't like using mascara, you can try these," she explained. "I don't like having to heat it up. I hope that someday they'll invent a better way to apply mascara." She giggled. "I know I'm a beautician and should be used to it, but I always think I'm going to poke out my eyes, or those of my customers!"
Mrs. Hale looked at Merope's cheeks, frowning. "I know the pale, porcelain look is in, but you already look quite pale. I wouldn't add any face powder. We need to add some color to those cheeks. Let's see now…"
The beautician turned to a set of different colored rouge. She picked up an orangey pink and applied it generously to the apples of Merope's cheeks, explaining the method as she did so. Lastly she picked up a stick of red lipstick.
"The style for lipstick these days is making your lips look like a cupid's bow," Mrs. Hale told her. "Rather than putting it all over your lips. Like so…" she put the lipstick in the middle of Merope's lips. Merope was watching her work in the mirror behind her. When she was finished she backed up so Merope could see her reflection in the mirror. Merope gasped and walked to the mirror so she was just inches away from it.
"Is that…me?" she whispered.
"Yes, it's you," Mrs. Hale confirmed. "Quite a difference, isn't it? Now you don't look like a clown anymore."
"H-how much do I owe you?" Merope asked.
Mrs. Hale's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, you don't have to pay me. This was just to teach you how to use makeup. Your mother has done me many favors, and I know money must be tight for you. Let's go show Kevin."
She led her outside to show Kevin. "Kevin, what do you think?"
Kevin was pushing a wheelbarrow full of twigs and rotten apples. He dropped the wheelbarrow when he saw Merope. "You—you did a good job, Mother."
"I know I did," Mrs. Hale said dismissively. "I've been doing this for years. She does clean up real nice, doesn't she? Shame your mother is no longer here to see it."
"I'm done with the tree, Mother," said Kevin. "I'll go burn the twigs now."
"All right," said Mrs. Hale.
As Kevin pushed the wheelbarrow passed them, Merope put her hand on the wheelbarrow. "Wait, this was from an apple tree?"
"Yes, we need to keep the tree pruned every year," said Kevin. "You want some apples? We've got plenty."
"That's fine," said Merope, picking up a twig. "But I'd like some wood…if you're just going to burn it anyway."
"I suppose that's all right," Mrs. Hale said. "I'll put some apples in a bag for you to take home. Kevin, load the horse cart and take Merope home."
Kevin did as he was told and Merope helped him load the cart.
"What are you going to do with this wood, Merope?" he asked. "Your house is surrounded by trees. I'm sure you have plenty of firewood for the winter."
"Not apple trees," he said.
"You're going to try growing one?" he said. "You won't be able with just a couple of twigs."
"I know someone in London that makes things out of wood," Merope explained. "And I—I like apple wood."
Mrs. Hale came out of the house carrying a paper sack. "Here, we always get more than we can ever use. I also put in a leaflet on beauty tips. You can practice."
"Thank you," said Merope.
"You best be getting this lady home," Mrs. Hale told her son.
Merope looked at Mrs. Hale. Mrs. Hale caught her looking at her. "What is it, dear?"
"Nobody called me a lady before," Merope admitted.
"That a fact?" she asked. "Well, now you're one. Now don't be a stranger. Do come by sometime. We can have dinner with us. Won't that be nice, Kevin?"
"Er, yes, of course," said Kevin.
Once Kevin hooked his mule to the wagon he and Merope climbed aboard. They mainly rode in silence. Merope saw Tom and Cecelia on his gorgeous chestnut. Merope straightened up, getting ready to greet them.
"H-Hello!" she exclaimed as they passed.
Tom's mouth fell open and he stopped his horse. Cecelia looked at her and then at Tom, who was still staring at Merope.
"Who's that?" Cecelia demanded.
"I—I don't know," said Tom, turning around to watch Merope and Kevin ride off.
Kevin grinned and nudged Merope. "Did you see that? Riddle didn't recognize you!"
They arrived at the Gaunt house and then Kevin gave her his hand to help her down.
"House is looking better," said Kevin. "I see you planted some flowers."
"Mmm," said Merope. He helped bring the wood by her fireplace and she set the sack of apples on her table.
They turned to each other. Kevin looked like he wanted to tell her something.
"What is it?" she prodded.
"Merope, I—I just wanted to reiterate what my mother said," Kevin told her. "You're welcome to our house anytime. You can have dinner with us and have some fun."
"Your mother told me we played together as children," she said. "I don't remember it though."
"Yes, we did play together," Kevin said, sitting down at the table. He felt tired. Merope got him a drink. "We flew kites and played with balls and my toy train set."
"I don't remember much before my mother died," Merope admitted. "Did she take me with her when she helped other people of the village?"
Kevin nodded. "Yeah, but from what I remembered, you didn't get along so well with the other kids. I think they were afraid of your brother. I know I was."
"You were afraid of Morfin?" Merope joined him at the table.
"Even now he still scares me," said Kevin. "I'm probably stronger than he is, but the way he always talked in that made up language of his, and the things he did to other people, I never wanted to get on his bad side."
"Everyone is on his bad side," Merope said.
"I was afraid of your father too," said Kevin. "He was mean. I wanted to come, but I was too scared and my father wouldn't take me. He was concerned your father might hurt me."
"Yes, your mother said something like that."
"Well, now that your father and brother are gone," he said, "we can spend time together. Come visit us whenever you'd like. I'll be happy to cut wood for you and help you with anything you need. We can go fishing. It'll be just like old times."
Merope didn't know what to say. She wanted to focus on getting Tom's heart, not Kevin's. She didn't care if she and Kevin were friends. Tom was the only man she wanted. She always wanted to be with him. She looked down and then looked at Kevin. She wondered if he was playing a trick on her. Did they really play together? Why would her mother take her to a muggle family to play with a muggle child? It made no sense. From what Merope gathered from her mother's writings, she wasn't happy about helping muggles to get money. Certainly she wouldn't make things hard on herself to bring Merope along. Merope wondered if it was her doing. Maybe begged her mother to take her to wherever she was going. Merope could see that. She didn't like being left alone with Morfin and her father.
She studied Kevin's face. He looked honest enough. But she had to focus on getting Tom. If Tom thought that Kevin was courting Merope, he might not be interested in her. There was also the risk of Kevin learning that Merope was a witch. What if he didn't want to be her friend anymore? Though he had a point. Merope was starting to feel lonely. Perhaps she could use Kevin to make Tom jealous.
"Can you—chop some of the trees down?" Merope inquired. "It gets dark here and I'll need wood for the winter."
"All right," Kevin nodded. "I'll talk to my parents about it. They think I'm lazy but I just get bored of doing chores at my house!"
Kevin rose to his feet. "I'd better get home. I'll see you soon."
"Okay," Merope said and she waved goodbye to him. She went back inside and studied her face. The makeover Mrs. Hale gave her really did make a huge difference. For the first time in her life, Merope had beauty. She had already got Kevin to notice her and it was probably more than just the fact they had been childhood friends. He was taken in by her new found beauty, she was sure about that. If she was able to get Kevin to notice her, then why not Tom? Merope smiled. She would become a true lady. She would find a way to win him over. She'd do everything it took. And if all her efforts were in vain, she still had the love potion to resort to.
TO BE CONTINUED