AN: I didn't plan a second part, but it seems that whenever I try to write a short story about either Han or Leia, the other one shortly insists that they need to have their part too, and I just can't argue. So, here is Han's part regarding that awful moment in TFA.
Summary: This is a short piece about the moment in TFA when Han succumbs to his fate…
The Force Didn't Listen – Han
By Dark Poltergeist
The explosives are set. Chewie has the detonator. It's time to go.
But then I see him.
Ben.
My son.
I could go and be safe. I should go and be safe, get Chewie and those kids and get the hell out of here. But it's Ben and I haven't seen him since he turned. And I need to bring him home.
For Leia.
And for me.
I so badly want to go home to Leia, make up for all the time I was stupidly away from her. I want to spend the rest of my life showing her how much I love her.
I hesitate for only a moment, because I'm not sure how much light is left in him, but Leia says she feels it and I trust her. I always have. I want to heIp him, I want to ease his pain. I know he can strike me down with little effort on his part, but I believe my son is still there, the toddler I bounced on my knee, the young boy that flew in the Falcon with me.
And I can't bear the thought that he will die when we blow up the base. I have no choice, I must try to save him.
I call to him as he walks across the bridge, and he pauses and slowly turns as I move towards him. When he takes off his mask, I see the face of my adult son for the first time in years. I can't help it, I tear up. He looks at me and I can see the conflict in his face as he offers me the lightsaber.
Anything, I will do anything to help you. Anything to bring you home. And I mean every word.
And much to my surprise, he takes me at my word and accepts my life as what he needs to move forward with his ascension in darkness. It seems such a contradiction in terms.
The red glow pierces through me, the pain agonizing as the white-hot burning sears every cell within me. But worse than the physical torment is the bitter knowledge that with this final act of darkness my son is gone. I reach out and touch his face knowing it will be the last physical thing I can ever do, seeing the last trace of my son fade as the darkness of death begins to take away my vision.
Then I am falling.
Spiraling into an infinite darkness from which there is no escape.
Leia, honey. I tried. I'm so sorry I failed you.
Love you, Leia. And Ben. I'm so sorry…
And then too weak for anything more. I close my eyes and let the darkness absorb me, taking away my pain, my love, my essence until I am one with oblivion.
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AN: Another bit of anguish, this time from Han's point of view.
Still not a happy fic and I still hate Disney for what they did to these beloved, iconic characters who deserved a much better fate that what they were given.
I may do one more from Ben. I haven't quite decided although something like that would fit well here. I also refuse to believe that H/L were bad parents, not buying it. And that they would have a psychopathic son like Ben? The movie writers used the characters to make their plot work, rather than being true to the characters and writing the plot around that. It makes me crazy when that happens. Ok, enough said.
