I DO NOT OWN FALLEN!

Six: Descend

Helston England, October 1854

It had only been three weeks since Daniel had left. Though the fracture in my heart felt as if it were caused by an eternity of his absence. For most of the time he had gone and left, I couldn't help but wonder why he would even want to leave. We had been together for nearly an entire year, and the way he would hold and kiss me felt so divine that I knew for certain that he truly loved my. Why would he choose now of all times to slip away when our entire lives together were nearly displayed out right before us?

When I looked into his eyes at the moment he said he would never be coming back, I knew they were not the words he had wished to say. There was a pained and longing look in those dark violet blue eyes of his. I had heard from a few of the townsfolk that he was journeying to the Americas alone. My heart had clenched when I made this discovery, he would be half an entire world away from me. The very echo of his name became to unbearable to whisper or even think about.

No letters from him had been sent to me, an almost promise as to him never returning back.

I had not played on my piano in such a long time, even when we were still together. The long days we would spend alone in peace and serenity would leave me very little time at home before I'd become weary to even play a single note to define our days together. But now, I have all the more reason to play. The emotions flooding my heart and soul yearned for some form of release.

The piano in my music room had collected a moderate amount of dust. I had gently with my hands wiped away the remnants of the dust cause by our time together. The reason behind my absence from sitting on the stool, and my hands placed over the smooth and polished ivory keys. As I examined the lonely grand instrument, I knew that I couldn't play here. This was the place that he would watch and listen to me play, closing his eyes as he lost himself in a reverie born from the euphoria I created with the infinite echos from the cloth cover mallets gently striking the metal strings. I needed to play somewhere new just this time in hope of moving on.

There is a small music theater in town that is very rarely used. I had once played inside of it on the old wooden baby grand piano for a concert the town had organized because I was the only pianist that lived here. The entire town had come just to see me play Moonlight Sonata and a piece that I had written myself. The whole theater was swarmed with the townsfolk that many people had to stand by the seats due to not enough being left.

I slowly walked through small townshop areas and neared the small theater. I clutched my silken robe closer to me from the cold October autumn winds that left my fingertips wan and numb. The theater was an old building that had faded wood that from my current distance I could see splinters chipped from the old and worn wood. I entered the door frame and walked down the small isle of chairs towards the small steps that led to the stage beholding the old piano.

Even from the new and perfectly polished one at home, I still favored this one more. I loved the idea of how old it was and all the people that could have sat upon and played on the darkened ivory keys. What used to have been white from they keys was now an almost faded brown color and a few of the keys had small chipped ends.

Running my hands on the rough faded ivory, I sat down on the small cushioned stool and gently placed my hands over the keys and began to play. The piano had remained tuned despite how little it was used. As I played, I looked for the perfect cords that expressed the emotions I had now felt, and then a melody arises from my lips and I begin to sing softly.

It is a very trebled octave tune and the further I played and sang along, words began to immerse.

Come on skinny love, just last the year
Pour a little salt, we were never here
My my my, my my my mymymy my
Staring at the sink of blood
and crushed veneer

Tell my love to wreck it all
Cut out all the ropes and let me fall
My my my, my my my mymymy my
Right in the moment this order's tall

And I told you to be patient
And I told you to be kind
And I told you to be balanced
And I told you to be kind
And now all your love is wasted
Then who the hell was I?
Cause now I'm breaking at the britches,
and at the end of all your lines

Who will love you?
Who will fight?
And who will fall, far behind?..

As I played the last whole note I knew that there was more to be said, but it was all to much to bear. My hands had left the pale brown worn Ivory and cradled my face as I began to cry. Soft whispered sobs had involuntarily escaped my lips as the sorrow kept in my heart escaped from its fracture. Tears had flowed down my cold cheeks and warmed them as they glided down to neck.

"That was beautiful..." A soft but deep voice had said from behind me, where the side exit door was. Although the voice was almost a whisper, it still startled me with a loud gasp sucked between my teeth and lips.

I quickly turned my head behind me to see a tall boy about my age standing right bellow the steps of the stage.

"My apologies, I didn't mean to startle you," he said kindly, and slowly walked up the few steps of the stage and stepped just a few feet away from where I was sitting on the stool. I could see now in the light from the candled lamps that he wore old and torn clothes with smears of dirt and stains in them, and the footwear he wore was torn and slowly falling apart.

I knew from the attire that he wore that he worked on the farm lands outside of Helston. The farmers here are paid very little and work for the majority of the day and only have the chance to rest on the weekends. Bathing and clothes are occasionally too expensive for them to have, so sometimes they are left with old clothing and have pretty poor hygiene.

Apart from how unsettling his clothing made him appear, his physical features were a sight to behold.

He had very broad shoulders which could only have been caused through countless hours of farm working and h is skin was beautifully tanned like freshly churned caramel. Light brown wavy hair had fell over his forehead that slightly hid luminous forest green eyes.

"I was just on my way back from delivering bread to the convenience store, and then I heard you playing and singing as I passed the theater. You have a very beautiful voice." He smiled warmly at me. His lips had light natural pink color to them and his facial hair had grown out slightly, making him appear older than he truly was. But then his warm smile slowly turned into a worried line. "Were... were you, crying?"

"Oh, um, yes, I am sorry," I said, quickly wiping away the wet rails of tears from my cheeks. " I've just, not been feeling all to well at present. I have to return home now so, forgive me." I rose from the stool preparing to walk out the side door from he probably came from.

"No, please wai-" he began as I arose. But then the bottom of my white peony sewn dress was caught on a chipped piece of the floor boards, causing me to step on top of it and losing my sense of balance. And then I began to fall forward.

I closed my eyes as I imagined my knees crashing to the floor followed by my crippled body, but then I felt strong thick arms protectively surround my entire torso. My body was slowly descended to the floor for a moments rest and then gathering my senses, I felt warmth radiating from the body that held my own. The large muscles in his arms and chest were tense and flexed from breaking my fall. Despite from how poorly unclean he appeared to be, he had a very faint sweet and almost spicy scent, like mint and cinnamon. I slightly pulled away so that i could face him, but my body had missed his warmth.

"My, that was very close," he said facing me with a careful smile. I was completely mesmerised by how much more grand and beautiful his features were up close. His green eyes were more lustrous and pure, and his sweet sent was stronger, filling my senses with him. My heart had involuntarily began to beat faster causing my breathing to accelerate from my lips. I could feel heat rising in my cheeks, signalling that they were turning red.

But then, I couldn't help but have a sense of familiarity in his eyes. Had I gazed at them once before? Were they just like Daniel's? No. I thought to myself. This boys eyes were completely different from his. But they still felt all too familiar.

"Um, pardon me for saying this," he said in the middle of my thoughts, "But... you are very beautiful." He gazed back at me with a similar look in his eyes that mine held. A breath had escaped my lungs from his comment and then he tucked a long section of black wavy hair behind my ear. "What is your name?" he asked softly.

"Lucinda." I whispered to him, trying to slow down my breathing.

"Lucinda," he whispered back to me, the sound of his voice had almost added meaning to my name. Just like the way Daniel used to say it. He brought both of his dry, calloused, dirt covered hands to my to my cheeks. I should have been appalled and disgusted by his touch, but the warmth that I missed from his body had returned through his large strong hands. And his touch was all too familiar to me to push away. "Please," he whispered again as his warm hands were gently secured around my cheeks, his worried expression returning, "forgive me for doing this."

And he slowly brought his lips down to mine in a soft tendered kiss.

His lips were surprisingly soft and smooth considering how dry and cold it was just outside. The warmth that radiated from his body began flooding into me just through his lips. I still had not pushed him away, and I didn't entirely know why. His warmth, his touch, his sent, his kiss. All of these features held some ounce of memory in my mind behind them, behind him.

I wrapped my arms around his broad shoulders and began to kiss him back, massaging my lips against his. His taste had a great resemblance to his sent, and I savored every moment, every stroke of his tongue against mine. His own arms came around my waist, and I could feel the strong muscles in them flex as he pressed our bodies together, making me feel so safely secured and warm. The quick gasps for air we made in between the kiss did not last long and we were forced to part away. His breathing had matched the quick tempo of mine and he still held me close to him.

"Tell me I'm mad," he began, looking me in the eyes with those bright iridescent green ones, "but, I swear that I've been right here before."

"No," I said back to him, my hands now falling to rest on his thick chest, "this feels very familiar for me too."

He let out a small breath of relief at my words. "Thank god," he said with that warm smile I began to grow fond of, "I was afraid you would strike me upon the face and scream out calling me a monster."

I place my smaller hand against his warm cheek, feeling the hairs on his face prickle against my touch. The face that he wore had showed so much kindness that I couldn't help but admire its beauty. His eyes, mouth, and face carried such delicate features apart from how physically strong he appeared. "Never," I said back to him. How could I strike and and ruin such delicate beauty from such a kind soul. "However," I said to him, not being able to hold back a smile, "I do find it very rude of you not to even give your own name before you kiss a lady."

"My dearest apologies madam," he responded, laughing slightly under his breath, "my name is Joaquin. My family had came here from Spain long before I was born, that's basically why its a very strange and foreign name here in England." he said, trying to hide the shyness in his smile.

"I think its a very nice name, it suits you well." My hand on his cheek hand wandered to his soft light brown hair, and I gently ran my fingers across the side of his temple.

"Thank you, Lucinda," he said, his eyes gleaming with from what I could see from our recent act of intimacy, was love. "But, please," he asked kindly, "call me Jack."

Song used in chapter: Skinny Love by Bon Ivor.