Prompt #9: Trust

Consciousness. The state of being aware and responsive to one's surroundings. Shadow thought the whole concept was overrated. Consciousness meant existing. It meant more than being. It meant thoughts. It meant feeling. It meant pain, though how much depended on who decided to bring him back. But being brought was always painful, and there was no escape from that.

It was like… before you were just being, without any of the costs that having an identity came with. Then you were shoved forcefully into a container, one that picked up on just how hot the world was. You burned a little. Then everything came back and you were aware. Aware of every tiny little detail – the way the sheets felt against your skin, the way the blankets made you too hot, the overpowering scents, the birds chirping, the wind. Emotions were the worst part. At first you don't know what in Din's name is going on.

And when you were someone like Shadow… you didn't feel like mortals felt. It wasn't tiny sensations in certain areas. Nervousness wasn't like butterflies in your stomach, fear wasn't a heart racing and love wasn't a gentle warmth in your chest. When Shadow felt, he felt with his everything. Every single part of his being. He was his emotions. He was ruled by them as much as ruled them.

So going from no emotions to a whole range of them a little stressful.

Shadow didn't even know what was going on at first. He couldn't even recall his name in the overwhelming confusion, curiosity, terror and elation. It took him a while to find himself. To find his memories. They bombarded him with information and more pesky emotions that he knew he had already started growing attached to.

When Shadow finally opened his eyes, he guessed that Zelda and her four heroes must have won the battle and brought him back. His first clue was the fact that he didn't seem to be in some kind of torture chamber – something that Ganon or Vaati probably would have preferred to do to him after his betrayal. His second was the window. The sun was shining, laughter echoed through the air and the land seemed peaceful. Which he doubted would be possible if Ganon or Vaati had taken over Hyrule.

Unless they decided to keep the Hylians too drunk to realize they were oppressed. He remembered joking with Vio about that once…

Either way, his terror (a useless emotion in his opinion) vanished and was replaced by anger. Anger and hatred. Vio's betrayal, the four Links destroying him and everything about them sent an inferno through every part of his body. He was done. He was tired of being used and manipulated. He was tired of being defined by the hero. He didn't want to deal with any more of this. It was too much, way too soon.

The door opened and the Princess of Hyrule walked through. She seemed tired, but her eyes lit up when she saw him. Her smile almost quelled his anger. Almost. After all, It wasn't often someone expressed concern for him.

"It's good to see you're up, Shadow" she greeted in a tone was somewhere between formal and relieved, "We had started to worry you'd never wake up."

Shadow cut right to the point, "How long ago did you bring me back."

"Last night, but we were still worried. The last time you were brought back you were awake instantly" Zelda answered.

"That's probably because you didn't bring me back within a couple of days. I faded from existence and wasn't anything until last night. That's not an instant thing, Princess" he scoffed.

Zelda smiled sadly, "It's Queen now. I wish we could have brought you back sooner, but we didn't find anything until a three months ago. And it took a long time to gather all the materials to sustain you."

"I hate everything."

"Anyway, now that you're up, is there anything I can do for you? We all owe you a lot after your sacrifice, so don't be afraid to ask" the recent (or possibly not, Shadow had no real way of telling) Queen of Hyrule offered.

Anger flicked, "I want to see your hero. Is he still separated into four, because I have some things I need to yell at certain parts of him."

"Green and Blue would be more than happy to see you, but Red is busy taking– Red and Vio are both busy. I don't know when Vio will be able to see you, but Red might be willing to see you later today" Zelda's eyes failed to meet Shadow's, and that wasn't the only thing that tipped him off that he was being feed BS.

"What's Vio doing?" he asked.

Zelda opened her mouth to reply, before she realized she hadn't thought of a decent lie and closed it. She sent Shadow a pleading look, asking him to drop the topic and take back the question. An answer, a random thought, appeared in Shadow's head and the fire went cold at it. A mantra of 'no' repeated throughout his head.

"What happened to him?"

Tell me I didn't kill him. Please tell me I didn't kill him.

"He was an idiot" Zelda sighed, "And now I think he learnt what happened when you messed around with the wrong magic starved and sleep deprived."

"He's not dead? Or dying?"

"Red had to slip him a mild sleeping potion in his tea, so he is in a magic-induced sleep. He'll be fine in a couple of days" she answered.

Shadow clenched his teeth, feeling them threaten to turn into fangs, "What are you hiding from me? I want to see him now."

"Shadow please…"

"Now."

Shadow didn't know what he was expecting. Vio was always strong and confident. When he was around Shadow, he had an aura of power. Maybe not magically or physically, but intellectually he was fierce. Even trapped in the Lost Woods, or facing his execution, Vio remained cool and collected. Unfazed. The black-clad boy had grown attached to the confidence that glowed within him. And the kindness and warmth that was buried beneath it.

Seeing Vio so pale… stuck in a bed with Red tending to him as best as he could, while Blue apparently had gotten fed up and snuck off to find a fairy… That wasn't Vio. And it was more than a little unsettling to Shadow. It was unnatural. He could hardly wrap his head around it. That the man in that bed was the same as the violet hero.

Green had understood that something was going with Shadow, even if Shadow couldn't understand it himself. Too many things were happening, too many emotions surfaced. He understood that Shadow wanted to be alone with Vio for a bit. Sweet Hylia, Green worked out that Shadow didn't want to leave Vio until the latter was better, offering to move a mattress into Vio's room for Shadow to sleep on if needed. Red took some persuasion to leave Vio's side, giving Shadow a hug before leaving. Shadow couldn't tell if Red was expressing pity, sorrow, or was just happy to see the Shadow back.

He found himself seated beside Vio's bed, right at his desk. It was littered with books on magic – ranging from light to some serious dark stuff that even Shadow (a reckless being brought into existence through dark, demonic powers) wouldn't mess with. He wondered if the others understood what Vio had subjected himself to. Those books should have been burnt, and they were lucky the goddesses didn't decide to use some form of divine intervention to put a stop to it.

"Hey."

The voice was too soft. It wasn't the tone he was used to hearing with that voice. It was just another thing that Shadow thought was wrong. It still brought his attention to the one on the bed, rather than the books that probably caused him a lot of trouble. Vio's lips curved into a soft smile. His hand twitched, as if he wanted to move his hand but wasn't sure about it.

"You're meant to be the smart one."

He had no idea why that was the first thing he said to Vio. Perhaps it was because he wanted to yell about betrayal, but couldn't when the other was obviously ill? Or maybe he felt the need to ensure that this wouldn't happen again. Even if Vio had been faking the whole time, Shadow still felt that he was his only friend, so this wasn't a sight he wanted to be greeted to upon coming back. This wasn't a sight he'd ever want to see again.

Vio's laughter was wrong as well, "It's a bit hard to be smart when you refuse to listen to reason. I got desperate wanting to get you back. I had to get you back."

"Well, next time, take a nap before any dark spells. I could have waited another day" Shadow replied, "Why are your eyes different shades of blue?"

Vio paused for a moment, "Healing magic has its limits, especially when the caster was already tired. It wasn't part of the spell. I made a deal with some… interesting 'people'… and that was the price. I don't mind, it was worth it in the end."

Shadow was about to reprimand him for that before Vio interrupted him, "I'm sorry. For what happened at the Tower of Flames. I never meant to take it that far."

"I can't trust you. I don't know if I can really trust anyone" Shadow sighed.

"If it helps, I wasn't lying the whole time. There were parts where I wasn't acting. I genuinely enjoyed your company."

"You know, I was prepared for that. Had my own little 'that's bullshit' speech prepared. But seeing as you were willing to lose an eye for me, among other things, I think I might believe that. Trust, however, is not something easily earned" even now Shadow had to fight for his form to remain the same shape.

Vio nodded, "It's even harder to regain. I'm willing to do what it takes, though."

"Well this does get you brownie points. Until you're better enough for me to yell at you for being more reckless than Blue. Sweet Hylia, I never thought you'd have done something so stupid."

"No matter what, I won't regret it."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll just wait here for the perfect moment to say 'I told ya'. Not every day I get to rub it in that you were wrong."